Compulsion: Magnetic Desires (25 page)

Where was there? I was too far away from Clo. Seb, we were going to call him Seb, cried in my arms. I stared at his tiny face as he wriggled and pushed his pruned little hand in his mouth. He blinked at me and I wondered if he knew his mother was dying. I didn’t know. I didn’t know anything but her.

"Charge it again."

I caught a glimpse of her knee. She was so pale, so white underneath the crimson that covered her like a veil.

"One. Two. Three. Four. Five."

A buzz in the air. "Clear!"

Beep, beep, beeeeeeee...

My life was over. My heart tumbled and spilled onto the floor. It was in my throat and in my feet. I was stretched too thin. She was dying, and I wished it was me.

"Charge it again."

Beep, Beeeeeeeeeeee

It was over. She was leaving me. I’d never survive without her. How was I supposed to be everything to our child? He needed his mother. I was useless to him.

"One. Two. Three. Four. Five."

"Clear!"

Bep, Beep, Beeeeeeeeeeee....

"We’re losing her."

"One. Two. Three. Four. Five."

"L
ife can be a bitch. It can hand you everything you wanted and in the same breath take it all away. I’m sure I could find some clichés for this phenomenon; everything happens for a reason, it is better to have loved and lost, the course of true love never runs smooth, but I think it comes down to life... is a roller coaster ride of ups and downs, and you never know when you’re going to be thrown from your seat."

Orion rests his head on his hands for a moment before he gazes back at the camera. Pain rolls over his features, and his eyes shine. His voice cracks as he hunches over. "I guess that’s why I had to make this video."

"I don’t plan on going anywhere. I don’t plan on leaving you. You’re my world, but today of all days I can’t help but think of how everything can change without any warning at all, and I need you to know, in case I’m not here... "

His shoulders shake, as he takes a moment to compose himself. "I want you to know the most important story in my life, the story of how I won the love of your mother, and how I was lucky enough to have you in my life."

The door behind him opens, and a small red headed child sticks his head into the room. "Daddy?"

Orion glances over his shoulder. "Did Mike send you to get me?"

"Yes." The boy scoots across the room and throws himself into Orion’s arms.

"Oh, look at you little man. Don’t you look all grown up in your suit?"

Seb pops his thumb in his mouth, and Orion scoops him up for a cuddle. "Did Uncle Mike help you get dressed?"

Seb nods, as he winds his arms around Orion’s neck. "Uncle Mike says it’s time to go."

"Okay then." Orion lowers him to the ground, and slips into his suit jacket. "I’m almost ready. Let me turn off the video."

He walks over to the camera. The black of his jacket and the white of his shirt fills the picture. "I’ll finish this later."

***

T
here were so many people inside the church already. They were chatting as they waited for us. I held Seb’s hand, and he buried his face against my leg.

Mike clapped me on the back. "Are you ready?"

I tilted my head in acknowledgement. Was I ready? Was this really happening? "Yeah."

Birdie and Mom made their way through the crowd, and I hugged them both.

Birdie squatted down to Seb’s height. "Hey little man, do you want to come with me and Nana while your dad gets ready?"

Seb stared at her with wide eyes. "Do you have candy?"

In a conspiratorial whisper, Birdie said, "I think Nana does."

She winked at me, and I let go of Seb’s hand so he could place his chubby fingers in hers. Mellie approached, and shot a cool stare over my shoulder at Mike, before turning her full attention on me.

She fussed with my collar, and picked invisible fluff from my shoulder. "Are you ready?"

"I think so," I said, "I’ve been ready all my life, but today..."

"You’re nervous." She straightened my tie and planted a kiss on my cheek. "It’s going to be perfect."

I clasped her arm. "How’s she doing?"

"Oh, she’s as nervous as you are." She grinned. "And with that, I better get back there."

Mellie scooted around me and pushed past Mike without a word.

"One day." I turned to him. "One of you is going to tell me what the hell happened."

"It was nothing." Mike glanced at his watch. "I think we better move up the front. It’s almost time."

We made our way through the guests who were finding their seats and took our position in front of the steps. Mom caught my eye and lifted a corner of her mouth. I glanced from her to Birdie, and then to Genevieve. It did nothing to soothe the jitter in my nerves. Standing at the front of the church waiting for Clo for the second time, I didn't want to run. This time I was where I was meant to be; the groom waiting for his bride. My feet were firmly planted on the ground, and I hoped it was the same for her.

Mellie slipped inside the church doors and offered me a thumbs up, cueing the music at the same time. My gaze was glued to the doors as Mellie threw them open and the guests went silent, while the music swelled and flowed through the room.

Clo was outlined by the bright sunshine that filtered past her as she stepped into the doorway. A vision in a simple sheath that skimmed the floor with each step she took toward me. Hugh patted her hand and whispered in her ear as he brought her up the aisle. I couldn’t have ripped my gaze from her, even if I’d wanted to.

Her gaze connected with mine. Glossy copper locks swept to one side and cascaded over her pale shoulder, serving to highlight the sparkle in her eyes and steal my breath away. Beaming at me, her lips tugged up into the intimate smile she reserved for me.

Finally, they reached me, and I noted the softness in Hugh’s gaze as he placed her hand in mine. "Take care of my girl."

"Always." I gripped his hand.

Hugh took his seat beside Genevieve, and I turned to Clo, running a finger over a loose curl. "My Angel."

Pulling her bottom lips between her teeth, she gazed up at me, and I squeezed her hand. It wasn’t the wedding that had her nervous. She’d called me from the hotel where she was staying with the girls early this morning before anyone else had woken. Sitting out on the laundry steps, so nervous I couldn't sleep, I'd been thinking how when we came home from our honeymoon we would be moving house. The house was finished and I was waiting until after the wedding to tell her, but she'd had news of her own and it scared both of us.

We were expecting another child. Somehow we created magic between us, but I’d almost lost her once and the thought of not being so lucky next time terrified both of us. I’d told her that we shouldn’t worry until we spoke to the doctors. They’d be able to give us answers, but for today at least we needed to put it aside. It was too early to stress over it, and today was meant for happiness.

She’d agreed with me, but she’d wanted me to do something for her. A video for Seb and our unborn child, in case tomorrow wasn’t as bright as today. She’d made one too.

I inched closer to her as we turned to face the priest, and he cleared his throat and addressed the crowd. "We have come here today, to witness the marriage of Orion and Clodagh... "

I stared into her eyes while the priest talked. His words barely penetrated my thoughts. I had waited so long for her I almost couldn’t believe she would be my wife. We had always belonged together, and I would never let her go. Everything would always be right, as long as we had each other.

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Keep reading for the first chapter of
Addiction
(Book 2 in the Magnetic Desires Series). Coming soon!

Chapter One

Drake

I
tossed the small yellow tube up in the air and dialed Will’s number. Staring at the little round pills, I shook the bottle once or twice while I waited for him to pick up. How long had it been since the last time I’d made this call? Was it nine, or maybe ten months?

"Hey, man." Will’s voice echoed into the apartment from where my phone sat on the counter. "What’s going on?"

I leaned against the counter, the tension uncoiling in my shoulders at his level tone. "I lost a patient today."

"Shit," Will said, and I could hear him moving about his sardine-sized apartment. "So, I’m guessing you’re not calling because you miss me."

I glanced at the bottle in my hand and walked around the counter to dump the pills in the trash. "I’m doing okay... better now."

"Good," Will said in that slow smooth way he had. "Do you need to talk about what happened?"

I picked up my phone and took it with me into the bedroom. "She’d had complications with a previous birth, but we were prepared. I told her and her husband..." I shoved my hand through my hair, "...not to worry. That everything would go smoothly. She started bleeding out. A blood condition we hadn’t found in our tests. There was nothing we could do. It happened so fast."

"You didn’t give up though, knowing you."

"No, but how do you tell a man he’s lost his wife? How do you tell him he has to go home without her?"

"I don’t know, man. I don’t know how you do it."

"Sometimes I don’t either but Hailey..."

"Hailey would have been proud of you."

I wasn’t so sure.

"So what are you going to do?"

I pondered the question while I crouched to look under the bed. My gym bag sat unused. Pulling it out, I wiped away the thin layer of dust that had settled on it. "I’m going back to boxing."

His smile came through clear in his next words. "You’ve come a long way, Drake. Just remember these moments will pass. Maybe go to a meeting."

I shouldered my bag and headed for the door. Sober for almost five years, the days of struggling to get through twenty-four hours at a time were further and further apart. Need no longer crawled through my veins the way it used to, but one slip up would be enough to destroy the life I’d rebuilt and take me back into hell. "Thanks Will. I’m doing all right. Next time I call it’ll be to say hello."

Will chuckled. "That’s cool, man. I get you’re busy saving the future generation."

"I’ll talk to you soon," I said, locking the door of my apartment.

"Until next time."

I smirked, knowing that Will had tipped an invisible hat at me as he hung up. Ending the call, I shoved the phone in my back pocket and stepped into the elevator.

The muscles in the back of my neck were tight and I rubbed them to loosen the knots. I hadn’t been able to save the patient this morning, and I hadn’t been able to save Hailey all those years ago. In two months, it would be ten years since I lost her. The memory of her floated to the surface.

***

S
he pulled the thin white sheet up under her arms and rolled onto her side, resting her head on her hand. The sun filtered through the blinds, adding to the lustrous shine of her dark locks. Tugging the loose wave that hung over her shoulder, I wound it around and around my finger. "You’re so goddamn beautiful."

She was radiant; her hazel eyes shining as she climbed over me. "You make me so happy, Drake."

She lowered her head to mine and the smell of her coconut shampoo danced in my nose. I breathed her in, intoxicated by her. Tightening my hold on that tendril of hair, I pulled her closer, and she giggled a peal of pure joy as she nibbled at my lips. My hand on the back of her neck, I brought her closer. "I can’t wait to have our own place, just you and me, baby. I can’t wait to make you scream."

"Actually, I have something to tell you." She beamed.

***

S
queezing my eyes shut, I locked away one of the few precious memories I could still remember. I hadn’t been in a relationship since Hailey. She couldn’t be replaced, and I didn’t want to try. The elevator doors parted and I stepped into the parking garage.

Since I’d moved to Reverence, I’d let go of the routines that had kept me sane. It had taken a while to settle in, and then I’d spent so much time at work I hadn’t had time for much else. The few lonely hours in between, I’d occupied with women who were interested in what I could give them in bed. Tonight though, I was swapping women for boxing.

I stalked over to my motorcycle and stowed my bag. I couldn’t let it go any longer. I needed to get back into routine. Pulling my helmet on, I started up the bike. The motor growled as I scooted out of the car park and down the exit ramp.

I sped the few short blocks from my apartment to the gym I’d looked up. From outside, I could hear the rhythmic thump of fists meeting bags, and I slid off the bike. Will had introduced me to the ring way back at the beginning of our friendship, and I’d gotten hooked. The same rush of adrenaline that came with my fist connecting with another man’s flesh coursed through me now.