Classic Snacks Made from Scratch (8 page)

ASSEMBLE THE CAKES:

Fill a pastry bag or gallon-size zip-top bag with the filling (see How to Fill a Pastry Bag,
page 187
). Use a sharp paring knife to cut small holes in the bottom of the cakes (a single hole for cupcakes, 3 or 4 for canoes or cut loaf pieces). Insert the pastry tip into each hole and squeeze gently to fill. The cakes will swell slightly as the holes fill up.

Dip the cakes into the raspberry glaze, coating all sides except the bottom. Sprinkle with coconut.

Store the filled cakes in the refrigerator in an airtight container for up to a week; as with most sponge cakes, they really do taste better after resting overnight than if eaten fresh.

A cross between a devil’s food cake and a whoopie pie, Drake’s Devil Dogs are a mystery for many who didn’t grow up on the East Coast. After Hostess bought the Brooklyn-founded company in the late ’90s, however, the regional snacks worked their way across the country. If you thought Suzy Qs and Ding Dongs were too greasy (not to mention oddly monikered), you might just say “hot dog!” to a Drake’s Devil Dog.

YIELD:
16 cakes

TOTAL TIME:
1 hour

DIFFICULTY:
3

SPECIAL EQUIPMENT:
canoe pan (or standard 12-cup muffin tin, 4 mini loaf pans, square metal baking pans, or split-top hot dog bun pan), food processor, electric hand mixer and/or stand mixer, candy/oil thermometer

CAKE

1/2 cup (1-1/2 ounces) unsweetened cocoa powder

1/2 cup boiling water

2-2/3 cups (10 ounces) cake flour

1 teaspoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon kosher salt

8 tablespoons (4 ounces) chilled unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch cubes

1 cup (7-1/2 ounces) packed light brown sugar

1 large egg

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup buttermilk

FILLING

3/4 cup (5-1/4 ounces) granulated sugar

1 tablespoon light corn syrup

1/4 cup water

3 large egg whites

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

MAKE THE CAKES:

Preheat the oven to 350°F. Spritz the pan(s) or pan wells with baking spray.

Whisk the cocoa powder with the boiling water in a small bowl until the powder is completely incorporated, with no lumps remaining. Set aside.

Whisk the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt together in a medium bowl. Set aside.

In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat the butter and brown sugar together for 2 to 3 minutes on medium speed, until fluffy and pale beige. Reduce the mixer speed to low and add the egg, mixing thoroughly, and then the vanilla.

Add the dissolved cocoa powder and stir for 30 seconds until fully combined. Add a third of the flour mixture, stirring until just combined, then half the buttermilk. Repeat with a third more flour, the remaining buttermilk, and then the final portion of flour.

Pour the batter into the prepared pan, filling each well half full if using a canoe pan or muffin tin. Save any remaining batter for a second batch.

Bake until the cakes are puffy and dry on top and a tester inserted into the center comes out clean—8 to 10 minutes for canoe shapes, 13 to 15 minutes for muffin tins or mini loaf pans, and 18 to 20 minutes for 8-inch square metal baking pans or hot dog pans. Timing may vary, so watch carefully.

Cool the cakes in the pan for 10 minutes on a wire rack; they will shrink and pull away from the sides of the pan. Then line the rack with waxed paper and spritz the paper lightly with baking spray. Invert the cake pan to turn the cakes out onto the rack. Cool completely before cutting into small loaf shapes (if using a loaf or hot dog pan) and filling.

MAKE THE FILLING:

In a small, high-sided saucepan, stir the granulated sugar, corn syrup, and water together over medium-low heat just until the sugar has fully dissolved and the liquid no longer feels granular. Clip a candy thermometer to the side of the pan and bring the liquid to a boil without stirring. Continue to heat until the sugar syrup reaches 235°F to 240°F (soft-ball stage).

Meanwhile, using the stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, whip the egg whites on medium speed just until soft peaks form. Just before the sugar syrup reaches soft-ball stage, restart the mixer on low speed. When the syrup reaches temperature, drizzle it into the egg whites.

Increase the mixer speed to medium-high and whip for 5 to 7 minutes, until the filling is thick, shiny, and white, forming stiff peaks. Add the vanilla and stir for 15 seconds to incorporate.

ASSEMBLE THE CAKES:

Slice each cooled cake in half lengthwise, then spread evenly with filling. (If you’re feeling fancy, you can pipe it, but a mini spatula works just fine.) Reassemble into a filled sandwich and serve.

Store the filled cakes in the refrigerator in an airtight container for up to 3 days.

If the junk food world has a hierarchy, cheese most definitely gets a spot at the top of the heap. And boy, do those snacks let you (and everyone else) know it, leaving that telltale orange grease all over your fingers as a calling card. Show-offs. So let’s celebrate this sassy neon subgroup of chips and crackers—only maybe let’s tone down the food coloring and amp up the real cheese flavor. Don’t worry, you’ll still be able to lick the powder off your hands when you’re done eating, I promise.

CHEEZ-ITS

GOLDFISH CRACKERS

NACHO CHEESE DORITOS

NACHO CHEESE COMBOS

CHEETOS

CHEESE POPCORN

CHEDDAR–PEANUT BUTTER CRACKERS

A Cheez-It is a finely tuned instrument, each tiny square packed with the triumvirate of the perfect flaky crunch, cheesiness with a hint of salt, and (possibly most importantly) just enough grease to leave a light sheen on your fingers. No wonder it’s impossible not to stuff handful after handful into your mouth.

A fluted pastry cutter re-creates the cracker’s signature pinked edges, but a sharp knife or pizza wheel will work just fine in a pinch. Use yellow Cheddar for a spot-on neon color, or white Cheddar for a subtler, more sophisticated hue.

YIELD:
about 13 dozen crackers

TOTAL TIME:
1 hour 45 minutes, including chilling time

DIFFICULTY:
2

SPECIAL EQUIPMENT:
stand mixer or food processor, fluted pastry cutter

1 (8-ounce) block extra-sharp Cheddar cheese, coarsely shredded

1 ounce finely grated Parmesan cheese (about 1/4 cup)

2 tablespoons chilled unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch cubes

2 tablespoons vegetable shortening, cut into 1/2-inch cubes

1 teaspoon kosher salt

1 cup (4-1/4 ounces) unbleached all-purpose flour

2 tablespoons ice-cold water

INSTRUCTIONS:

Using a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, blend the cheeses, butter, shortening, and salt on medium-low speed, or pulse in the bowl of a food processor until soft and homogenous. Add the flour and pulse or mix on low to combine; the dough will be dry and pebbly.

Slowly add the water (through the feed tube, if using a food processor) and continue to pulse/mix as the dough coalesces into a mass. Depending on the brand of cheese used and the humidity level at the time, you might need a small dribble of water or the full 2 tablespoons. Pat the dough into a disc, wrap tightly with plastic wrap, and refrigerate for at least 1 hour.

Preheat the oven to 375°F. Line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper or Silpat liners.

Divide the dough into 2 pieces on a floured surface and roll each into a very thin (1/8 inch or less) 10 by 12-inch rectangle. Using a fluted pastry cutter, cut the rectangles into 1-inch squares, then transfer to the baking sheets. Use a toothpick or the tip of a chopstick to punch a hole in the center of each square.

Bake for 12 to 15 minutes, or until puffed and browning at the edges. Watch carefully, as the high fat content of the crackers makes it a fine line between golden delicious and burnt. Immediately move the baked crackers onto wire racks to cool.

Store your Cheez-Its at room temperature in an airtight container for up to a week.

“I love fishes cause they’re so delicious!” Was there ever a more accurate jingle in the history of Saturday-morning snack food commercials? The light crunch, adorable shape, and notably unfried makeup meant kids could nearly always con their parents into buying a bag for the lunchbox. We are all utterly powerless in the face of Goldfish. And can’t we all agree that the Cheddar fish are the top dog in Goldfish flavors?

YIELD:
10 to 15 dozen crackers (depending on cookie-cutter size)

TOTAL TIME:
1 hour

DIFFICULTY:
2

SPECIAL EQUIPMENT:
goldfish-shaped cookie cutter

1 cup (4 ounces) very finely shredded sharp Cheddar cheese

1/2 cup (2-1/8 ounces) unbleached all-purpose flour

1/2 cup (2-1/8 ounces) cake flour

1 tablespoon Cheddar cheese powder (see
page 12
)

1 teaspoon kosher salt

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon onion powder

1/4 cup whole or reduced-fat milk

1 tablespoon vegetable oil

MAKE THE DOUGH:

Stir the cheese, flours, Cheddar powder, salt, baking powder, and onion powder together in a large bowl until the cheese is evenly distributed and coated. Add the milk and vegetable oil and continue to stir with a spatula, then knead in the bowl with your hands until a cohesive dough forms. It will be crumbly at first, but continue to press and knead the dough until any dry bits are incorporated.

Transfer the dough to your work surface, cover with the upside-down bowl, and let rest for 10 minutes.

MAKE THE CRACKERS:

Preheat the oven to 375°F. Line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper or Silpat liners.

Divide the dough into 2 pieces. Refrigerate one piece while you roll the second piece as thin as humanly possible, no more than 1/8 inch thick. (The thinner your dough, the crispier your crackers will be; thicker dough means puffier, more bread-like crackers.)

Stamp out cracker shapes with your cookie cutter of choice: a fish is the traditional shape, of course, but the crackers taste just as good as hearts, stars, circles, or small squares. Transfer the shapes to the prepared baking sheets.

Bake for approximately 15 minutes, until the crackers are crispy and just turning golden at the edges. The timing will vary according to the size and shape of your crackers.

Transfer to a wire rack and let cool completely.

The crackers will soften when kept in an airtight container, so they’re best eaten within a day or two.

Nacho Cheese Doritos are my personal Kryptonite—I’ve been known to snack myself to the point of queasiness with a single bag. Thankfully, the homemade kind makes me mindful of how much I crunch, because I’m the one who’ll have to make more when I chomp through the whole batch. Even though this recipe leaves a white coating on your fingertips instead of the telltale orange residue, the pow-boom-bap signature spice is still there, lightly dusted all over the freshly fried tortilla chips.