Christian Domestic Discipline 101 (5 page)

Since every woman is different, a husband must learn his own wife’s body language to gauge how effective the punishment is. This will come with time, open communication, observation, and experience.

Uncooperative Wife

A husband in a CDD marriage should expect his wife to be reasonably cooperative when he has decided to spank her. Of course since Punishment Spankings HURT, it is reasonable that a woman will squirm around, cry, beg, or even become angry during a spanking. However, she should be expected to place herself into position to begin with and maintain that position to a certain extent.

Often a woman will try to “back out” of the agreement just at the point when she is to be punished. This should not be allowed to happen or it will derail the whole arrangement.

Within a consensual CDD marriage, a husband should never allow her refusal to submit to go unpunished. If she refuses to stay in position, perhaps she should receive strokes to her thighs or be spanked in the diaper position. If her hands keep flying back to block his strokes, her palms might receive a stinging
“hand spanking”
with the end of a belt, a switch, or other
flexible
implement.
(***Always use extreme caution when spanking outside of the “safe-spanking zone”***)

A woman who refuses to remain in position might be punished with extra strokes, but these need to be distinctly separate, maybe after a period of time in the corner, so that she realizes she’s paying for her uncooperative attitude rather than the misbehavior that got her punished to begin with. If the uncooperative behavior is particularly abhorrent, another full spanking may be given at a later time.

AAAC Spanking

If the Punishment Spanking is the most dreaded of all spankings, the
AAAC
or
Avoid At All Costs Spanking
is the most dreaded of the Punishment Spankings.

An AAAC Spanking is dreadful by design. Usually long and drawn out, it is severe, painful, and destined to be remembered. These should be administered sparingly and only for the worst misbehaviors.

Bruising/Marks

Nothing seems to distress a husband new to CDD more than finding he has left bruises or marks on his sweetie’s behind, but he should know it is very common, especially for bottoms unaccustomed to a lot of spanking.

A bruise, of course, is nothing more than blood that has pooled under the surface of the skin from small broken blood vessels. Even though they can be painful, they are rarely as serious as husbands seem to fear.

The problem seems to be that bruising is so closely associated with abuse. In child abuse cases involving spanking, often a legally acceptable punishment is differentiated from an unacceptable one by the presence of a bruise. However, this makes little sense.

A husband should realize the force that would bruise one woman may not bruise another. Genetic predisposition, skin tone, and even nutritional status can all cause an individual woman to bruise more easily than another. As he gains experience, he will learn his own wife’s tendencies and be able to adjust accordingly.

Of course most husbands will want to prevent bruises if he is able. As mentioned before, one method of doing this is to begin each spanking with a warm up, especially if he plans to give a long, severe one. Another method is to provide breaks between series of swats. Never continue to spank if the flesh of her bottom is visibly turning bluish in color, or if your implement begins to leave white marks on her solidly pink flesh as this indicates bruises may be developing.

An ice pack or the old standby, a bag of frozen peas, applied to the bottom just after the spanking can prevent bruises from forming by decreasing the blood flow to the area. It also helps with the pain . Never apply a heating pad as this causes more blood to flow to the area and can worsen the bruising.

So what if despite all your efforts, you still end up with bruises? As stated before, they are rarely serious and should soon begin to fade. A product called
Arnica Gel
might be applied to facilitate healing, as well as the continued use of frozen peas. Avoid spanking in that area until the bruise has healed.
(***In rare cases and medical conditions, a bruise may need medical attention. See your doctor if you have any doubts.)

Aftercare

What to do after a spanking is an individual decision as well. Some women want nothing more than to be held and comforted by their husbands. Others need time to reflect on their punishment before they are ready to receive affection from him.

Some men will not allow their wives to “rub away the sting”, believing the lasting effects of the spanking adds to the lesson she’s learned. Others like to rub cooling cream or Arnica Gel on their wives’ scalded behinds as a gesture of care and comfort.

Some wives want to take a nap and need to be chastely kissed and tucked into bed. Others want and need their husbands to comfort them sexually.

The important thing to remember after a spanking is that the transgression has been paid for and the wife should feel completely and freely forgiven. It is important that husbands be patient and caring toward their wives as she works through her feelings after a punishment.

Making Love

It concerns many women that their husbands want to make love directly after they’ve spanked her, but I see this as a natural and maybe even inevitable consequence. First of all, he has been recently focused on her (probably bare) bottom. This alone causes most red-blooded men to want to make love to their wives. But more importantly, he is probably aroused by her submissive and trusting gesture by placing herself into a position to receive discipline from him.

Remember, God created us to be most content in the roles He created for us, and He created erotic feelings to be enjoyed inside a marriage. It seems natural that we would be aroused by these roles in their most basic form. There are probably few things that punctuate our most basic roles in marriage more than the dominance and submission of a discipline session.

Furthermore, since most men see making love as an expression of affection and comfort, they may feel the need to comfort their wives in that way and receive comfort in return.

Other husbands, on the other hand, do not want to make love after a spanking as they do not wish punishment and sex to be confused in any way in their wives’ minds. Many wives have no desire to make love just afterwards, but would rather have time to calm themselves and reflect on what has occurred. However, that doesn’t stop many of them from finding themselves unable to keep their hands off their husbands in a couple of hours!

Again, this is one of those things individual to a couple’s wants and needs. Just don’t feel guilty or confused if you find yourselves aroused after a discipline session. It doesn’t negate the lesson or make it any less serious. It just confirms you are in love with one another and the roles you are emphasizing are those ordained by God to cause your marriage to be the best it can be, even in your marriage bed.

Glossary

AAAC:
Acronym for Avoid At All Costs. A spanking designed to be particularly severe.

Aftercare:
Comfort and physical care given to the wife after a punishment spanking.

Arnica Gel:
A topical gel (usually aloe for its cooling effect) made from a flowering perennial plant,
Arnica Montana
, which is thought beneficial in healing bruises, swelling, and pain.

CDD:
Acronym for Christian Domestic Discipline. An arrangement between a Christian married couple that involves the husband having authority in the household and enforcing that authority through spanking or other means of punishment.

Coccyx:
The end of the spine. Commonly called the tailbone.

Consensual:
Both husband and wife agree to live in the CDD relationship and to all it entails.

Corner time:
An alternative form of punishment where a wife is required to stand facing a corner, often with her bottom on display, before, during, or after a spanking.

Diaper Position:
Spanking position where wife lies on her back with her legs raised upwards toward her head.

Discipline:
To train or develop, bring under control, or punish.

Domestic Discipline:
An arrangement between two adults where one is given authority over the other and enforces that authority through spanking or other means of punishment.

Hand-Spanking: 1.
A
spanking given with the hand.
2.
A light but stinging series of slaps administered to the palms of a wife’s hands when she fails to keep them out of the way during a spanking.

Implement:
An instrument used to administer a spanking.

Maintenance Journal:
A record of a wife’s behavior presented to her husband before a scheduled maintenance spanking.

Maintenance Spanking:
Spankings given in regular intervals for the purpose of maintaining a submissive mindset in a wife, correcting minor faults, and/or reinforcing marital roles.

OTK:
Acronym for Over the Knee. A popular spanking position in which the wife is placed face down across her husband’s lap with her head on one side, her legs on the other, and her bottom supported by his knees.

Play Spanking:
A lighthearted spanking given for the purpose of play, sexual enhancement, reinforcement of marital roles, and/or maintaining a submissive mindset in a wife.

Pre-emptive Spanking:
A spanking given before an event or occasion where a wife has, in the past, had a difficult time with her behavior in the hopes the reminder will help her to behave, sparing her a more severe punishment spanking.

Punishment:
A penalty inflicted for misbehavior.

Punishment Spanking:
A spanking given for the purpose of correcting misbehavior.

Razor Strop:
A heavy leather strap designed for the purpose of sharpening the blade of a straight razor.

Reminder Spanking:
See Pre-emptive Spanking

Safe Spanking Zone:
The areas of the buttocks it is relatively safe to spank. Begins at the crest of the buttocks and ends about midway down the thighs, avoiding the sides and genitals.

Sit Spot:
The sensitive lower area of a woman’s buttocks located just above and at the area where her cheeks meet her upper thighs.

Soaping:
A dangerous alternative punishment where a wife’s mouth is washed with soap.
Not recommended.