Children in Her Shadow (5 page)

At Ruth’s Splott home Mrs Morgan decided that as a Christmas treat, Mary and Ruth deserved a night out with her at the Merchant Navy Officers Club in the dock area, a regular and favoured haunt of hers for many years. And so with only two days to go before Christmas the three ladies, dressed in their finest set off into the blackout with torches in hand to visit Cardiff docks and into Mrs Morgan’s nocturnal world.

As they settled into the smoke filled club, Ruth was awe struck to find that this was a world filled with handsome young officers dressed in their magnificent uniforms all clearly with an eye for the ladies. She could overhear their stories of exotic places on the other side of the world and their encounters when being escorted through the dangerous shipping lanes by the Royal Navy.

The club was filled with the blue grey haze of cigarette smoke and the strong smell of beer and spirits and in the dimmed light Ruth could see a smattering of ladies who Mary described in a nonchalant manner as, “liberal minded” who wanted a “good time with these brave young fellas.” Ruth scanned the large bar area and observed dozens of uniformed men all who seemed incapable of any kind of coherent conversation in the company of the bevy of beautiful young ladies.

With hardly a moment’s thought for Mary and Ruth, Mrs Morgan slipped away with someone who was later identified as the captain to “inspect his ship” only to return an hour or so later looking almost as chirpy as the captain.

Mary and Ruth struck up the occasional conversation with those young men who tried to enter their company but Mary was adept at seeing them off with a whisper in their ear that resulted in the strangest look at both of them before they went on their way.

Ruth and Mary were much more preoccupied by the comings and goings of the ladies and their officer friends. Ruth pressed Mary about her mother: “You have mentioned your mother’s men friends” she said, “But tell me more” giggled Ruth anxious not to leave this place without a feel for why Mrs Morgan loved it so much. And in that matter of fact way that Ruth had become accustomed to and valued, Mary simply said, “she has a lot of men friends who always want to see her when they are in port and what she gets up to is up to her.” Mary paused and ended by saying, “I wouldn’t want that kind of life or those kinds of relationships but Mam has had to do whatever was necessary to have the life she wanted” She went on, “My Gran was the same and so we just don’t talk about it.”

As Ruth and Mary sat drinking their lemonade they talked a lot about men and relationships and concluded that men only want one thing and neither of them was inclined to give it to them. Whilst not being at all interested by the constant attention of the men in the bar, they were both fascinated by the way that some of the women seemed to move from one man to another leaving Mary to simply say, “They’re going to be exhausted by the time they get home tonight.”

Ruth travelled home to Senghenydd on the afternoon of Christmas Eve carrying gifts for her family bought from the few shillings she had managed to save over the past few weeks. She also carried a bag containing a selection of rationed items given to her by Mrs Morgan crammed with some of the gifts given to her by her men friends.

The bag contained a bar of chocolate, twenty American cigarettes, a Cuban cigar, two pairs of stockings, Dutch cheese, a salami sausage, six eggs, and half a pound of bacon and half a pound of butter. As Mrs Morgan gave the parcel to Ruth she said, “This is for you and your Mam and Dad from me for being such a good girl.” And with a glint in her eye she whispered, “And there are to be no question asked”! Ruth felt slightly uncomfortable about carrying what were clearly black market goods but knew that her Mother would be thrilled, as indeed she was.

Christmas was an enjoyable time, as it gave Ruth an opportunity to be with her family and to see friends who she had not seen for some months since starting work in Cardiff. She called in to see Auntie Lott and Uncle Arthur and was delighted to see that Dai was home. Ruth had grown up in the company of Dai and she loved his stories of where he had been and what he was doing.

All too soon Ruth was back into Cardiff to work the few days between Christmas and New Year as part of a skeleton staff. It was decided that as New Year’s Day fell on the Wednesday, and Ruth would have to be back in the post office on the Thursday, she should stay in Cardiff rather than go home to Senghenydd.

Having worked through to six o’clock on New Year’s Eve Ruth took some persuading by Mary that they should stay up until midnight but they did. She loved the sense of naughtiness and the feeling that this is what adults do. Not surprisingly, Mrs Morgan was at the Merchant Navy Officers Club and so at a few minutes to midnight Ruth and Mary ran out into the darkened street to join neighbours and passersby in cheering in the New Year much to the annoyance of the ARP who reminded everyone that there was a war on and that they should observe the blackout.

Despite earlier apprehension Ruth was overjoyed to be able to say that she had seen in the year of nineteen forty one a New Year of hope for everyone. How short that celebration would be and how rapidly the tears of happiness would be replaced by tears of grief and despair.

It was the second of January and having worked all day Ruth and Mary, wearily walked arm in arm on their short stroll from the post office to Splott in the cold evening air of winter. They were a matter of a minute or two from their home at about six thirty when the air raid sirens wailed their eerie tone across the city. First one could be heard then another, then more. Ruth looked to Mary and in an instance they knew to run the few yards home. On entering from the rear gate they rushed immediately to their air raid shelter at the bottom of the garden.

Mary dashed into the house and collected the paraffin lamp that was always kept by the back door. She also grabbed the blankets that were kept in the same place and a loaf of bread from the kitchen. Mary had hardly reached the shelter when the sound of bombs exploding could be heard in the general direction of Grangetown and Adamsdown. They could by now hear the crack, crack, crack of the anti aircraft guns as searchlights combed the night sky for German aircraft.

The girls grabbed each other as the sound of more explosions could be heard and they knew instinctively that this was going to be bad. They closed the door of the shelter and threw themselves to the floor as explosion after explosion could be heard nearby. Still more terrifying blasts could be heard as the relentless explosion of bombs shook the ground. In tears and screaming the girls grabbed each other and shook with fear.

They had spent many nights in the shelter in the past and had experienced the fear of bombing before, but nothing they had been through was as intense as this. As more bombs rained down upon Cardiff and the docks area, it became clear that the shards of light they could see piercing the holes in the door were not just searchlights but they were also the flames from intense fires burning some distance away. The bombing continued for some time before it abruptly ended.

After about ten minutes of silence they heard the sounds of neighbours shouting and screaming. Not waiting for the
all clear
they stumbled out of the shelter and stood awe struck by what they saw. There were fires raging across the whole horizon in the direction of Whitchurch, Canton and Adamsdown all areas of Cardiff close to Splott and very near to Cardiff docks. Before long people were relaying stories that Llandaff Cathederal was alight and that Llandaff Village had also been hit.

As the few minutes passed by it became clear to Ruth that she could not stand there and do nothing. She quickly asked a few of the neighbours if they were willing to go to Adamsdown to see if they could help. Mary and three other women were instant volunteers and within minutes those who could not go were offering blankets, sheets for bandages and thermos flasks of hot tea.

Ruth and her group of ladies ran as quickly as they could in the general direction of the flames and as they came closer the full horror of what they had heard and seen from a distance confronted them. They saw the full impact that the bombings had visited upon these streets and homes. Houses were alight, many were mere heaps of rubble still more had the whole front blown out and family possessions were eerily visible in the bedrooms that were now torn apart.

There were many injured and frightened people in the street, some walking aimlessly in circles still dazed by the sheer ferocity and devastation of the bombing others were too injured to move, others were clearly dead. Ruth saw a police officer and explained that she and other volunteers were here to help. They were immediately dispatched to the corner of a street where a temporary refuge centre was being established to help cope with the many confused, frightened and very distressed women and children who were in deep shock.

Ruth soon realised that unless these good people were wrapped up warm, very quickly many could perish on this bitter cold night. As Ruth organised her band of helpers to assist this group, she was drawn towards a makeshift medical area a few yards away that was acting as a holding location for people who needed hospital treatment and who would need to wait until an ambulance arrived to transport them. Men were clearing rubble from the streets to provide access to ambulances and the fire engines. It was already evident that in the absence of ambulances, any available vehicle was being commandeered to rush these dreadfully injured people to the care of doctors and nurses in the nearby hospital.

Ruth recognised one of the people giving assistance as a customer from the post office and knew that he was a local family doctor. She asked if there was any help she could give and, looking deep into Ruth’s eyes, he explained that many here would die before they reached hospital, and that all she and others could do was to make them comfortable before their inevitable demise. He warned that what she would see would be shocking and distressing and asked her to be certain before she offered her help.

Ruth was drawn to a woman whose injuries were repulsively shocking, she was very badly burnt and it was clear that she had face and head injuries. The woman was laying on the pavement, dust and rubble around her. Ruth knew she was going to die alone if she didn’t face the horror and bring some care and comfort quickly.

Ruth knelt beside this poor wreck of humanity and slowly moved her burnt head into her own lap and gently placed the woman’s hand in hers. In the flickering light of the fires Ruth looked into the face of this young woman and, as her mother would do for her when she was in pain, she gently stroked her face and quietly sang the only hymn that came into her head which was the twenty third Psalm: As she sung these poignant words so others knelt beside the two of them and joined Ruth:

The Lord’s my Shepherd, I’ll not want.

He makes me down to lie

In pastures green; He leadeth me

The quiet waters by
.

My soul He doth restore again;

And me to walk doth make

Within the paths of righteousness,

Even for His own Name’s sake.

Yea, though I walk in death’s dark vale,

Yet will I fear none ill;

For Thou art with me; and Thy rod

And staff me comfort still.

My table Thou hast furnished

In presence of my foes;

My head Thou dost with oil anoint,

And my cup overflows.

Goodness and mercy all my life

Shall surely follow me;

And in God’s house forevermore

My dwelling place shall be.

There they stayed until, sometime later the doctor came over to Ruth and with an experienced compassion he gently closed the woman’s eyes and softly said to Ruth, “This night I have seen the very worst and the very best that mankind can do one to another.” He looked back at Ruth and said, “Your kindness and your compassion has meant that these victims of war didn’t face their maker without firstly looking into the eyes of kindness, you are a brave young soul and I will not forget what you have done here tonight.” With that the kind doctor moved on. Ruth moved from one person to another, some who would not survive and others that simply needed a caring word to see them through this terrible, terrible night.

Some hours later Ruth met with her friends and they slowly and in silence walked back to their homes each with their own mental pictures of what they had seen. It was many more hours before the full extent of what had happened began to unfold as it became clear that dozens of people had been killed and many more were injured. People who were running from the general direction of the fires brought with them terrible tales of destruction and death. Neighbours were calling out to passersby to ask if they had seen their loved ones. Then suddenly Mary realised that there was no sign of her mother.

It was by now gone ten o’clock and Mary was becoming increasingly concerned. One neighbour said they had seen Mrs Morgan in Grangetown and another said she was definitely at the docks. The confusion was soon resolved when a dishevelled smoke covered Mrs Morgan was brought to the house by a police constable declaring her to be the heroine of the hour for personally dragging several people from a burning house in Grangetown, returning several times before she was satisfied that all the residents had been evacuated.

The all clear siren did not sound in the Cardiff area until just before five o’clock in the morning and perhaps it was only then that this small group of people realised the real danger they had put themselves in to try to help the dead and the dying. The following days were to reveal that more than one hundred and sixty people perished and several hundred more were seriously injured many with hideous burns.

The scars from what Ruth had seen were deep. Whilst the sense of duty in Ruth saw her return to work the following day, she became increasingly frightened by the prospect of further bombing raids. She shared none of her deep anxiety with her mother though it was clear that her mother and father were worried about the impact this incident had on Ruth and the prospect of further bombing raids on Cardiff which was an important strategic port for munitions for the war and food for the nation.