Child of Promise (22 page)

A look of concern in her eyes, Abby nodded. “As a matter of fact, he just stopped in for a quick glass of lemonade.” She opened the screen door. “Come on in. Your father’s in the kitchen.”

Beth led the way, Abby following, and found her father sitting at the table, a glass of pink lemonade in his hand. His eyes brightened at the sight of her.

“Well, what’s this? Someone sick at Culdee Creek that I don’t know about?”

Beth glanced sheepishly down at her doctor’s bag. “No, no one’s sick that I know about. I’m just glued to this bag, I guess.”

She pulled out a chair, set her bag off to one side, and took her seat. Abby poured an extra glass of lemonade. After placing it before Beth, she sat down opposite her husband.

“Beth came to visit because she has something she wants to talk with us about,” Abby said. She turned to Beth. “Don’t you, honey?”

Two pairs of eyes riveted on Beth. She wet her lips, paused to consider several ways to present the news, and finally discarded them all.

“Noah’s been offered a position at his old seminary, and he’s seriously considering taking it. In case you didn’t know, the seminary’s in New York City.”

For a long moment, there was silence. Then Conor cleared his throat.

“How do you feel about that, girl?”

“I love Noah, and I want him to be happy.” Beth toyed with her lemonade, tracing little swirls on the perspiration-coated glass. “He’s so upset over Harlow’s death and what he views as his part in it, that he’s admitted he’s considering even leaving the priesthood. But this offer, coming when it did . . . well, Noah’s very excited about it. It may be what he needs to regain his heart for the ministry.”

“But how do you feel about leaving your practice here, leaving Grand View, leaving us?” her father persisted. “Or doesn’t anything matter to you anymore but what Noah wants?”

“That’s not fair, Pa! Of course it matters that I’d have to leave everything. I love it here. I love working with Doc, love the inroads I’ve made with my patients. I love this place, and I’m s-so happy to be back home.”

Tears filled her eyes and she had to choke back a sob. “But Noah . . . he’s so unhappy, Pa. He feels like such a failure.

And I fear the Petersons’ tragedy, coming like it did on the heels of Alice’s and Millie’s deaths . . . well, it’s all Noah can do right now even to hold onto his faith in God.”

Conor and Abby exchanged troubled looks.

“It’s gotten that bad, has it?” her father asked. “Blast Noah’s stubborn streak of pride! Besides telling you, he sure hasn’t let onto anyone else how despondent he’s become. He’s quieter of late, maybe doesn’t laugh as much as he used to, but aside from that, he’s hidden his pain well.”

“I asked him to come talk with you, Pa,” Beth said. “I told him you could help him if any man could. Has he ever come?”

“No.” Conor pursed his lips and shook his head. “No, he hasn’t. But I’ve half a mind to ride out this very afternoon, grab him up by his collar, and shake some sense into him.”

Beth reached over and grasped her father’s wrist. “No. Don’t. I don’t want him to know I’ve talked to you about this. It’s probably not right as it is, a wife going behind her husband’s back, but I just didn’t know what else to do. Not only do I not want to leave here, but I don’t think it’s the best thing for Noah, either.”

“Why not, Beth?” Abby asked. “Why don’t you think it’s the best thing for Noah?”

Why, indeed? Beth thought to herself. She pondered that question for several seconds.

“I don’t know,” she answered at last. “It’s just a gut feeling. He’s been so good for Grand View, and we still need him here. It’s . . . it’s almost as if Noah’s running away from difficulties meant to help him grow. As if . . . as if he’s running away from God.”

“Then help him to see that.” Abby leaned forward, a fierce light gleaming in her eyes. “Do what’s truly best for Noah, no matter how hard it is. Don’t
you
run away from the difficulties meant to help you grow, either. And don’t shirk
your
responsibilities to God.”

Beth met her stepmother’s gaze. Something unspoken passed between them—a woman’s intuition, an understanding of the depth and scope of commitment demanded in loving a man—piercing clear through to Beth’s soul.

So this was how it was between her parents. This was what Abby had done for her father. And this was what she must do for Noah, in keeping her promises to him.

Beth smiled, in recognition, in gratitude, in renewed determination. Thank You, Lord. Thank You for all You have given me, in giving me such wonderful parents, in my Culdee Creek family, in my friends, and most of all, in my precious husband.

“Yes,” Beth whispered. “I see, Abby. I understand at last.”

21

Who hath ears to hear, let him hear.

Matthew 13:9

When it was time to leave, Beth’s parents walked her out onto the front porch. She gave them both a hug and a kiss.

“I knew coming to talk with you would help,” she said, glancing from one to the other. “It always has and always will. Now if I can be even half as wise when it comes to Noah . . .”

“Noah? What’s this about Noah?” Ian asked, walking up from around the back of the house. “Having a marital spat already, are ye?”

Beth sighed in exasperation, shook her head at her parents, then turned to the young Scotsman. “You’ve an uncanny ability, you know, to turn up at the most unexpected times.”

Ian grinned. “Only when it comes to ye, lass. Only when it comes to ye.”

Behind Beth, her father chuckled. “Reckon we’ll leave you two to your wrangling and head on back inside.” He laid a hand on her shoulder. “If there’s anything else you need, girl, any time, just give us a call and we’ll be there for you.”

She glanced over her shoulder and nodded. “I know, Pa. Thanks.” Then as her parents walked inside, their departure punctuated by the snap of the screen door closing, she turned to Ian.

“I was just about to ride back to Grand View. What are you up to these days?”

He shrugged. “Not verra much. I’m thinking I’ll be moving on soon. Mayhap travel farther west, to California or Washington state. Or mayhap even to Alaska.”

“Really? But you haven’t been here for more than a few weeks, Ian. It’s not at all long enough. I haven’t had a chance to spend much time with you.”

“Aye,” he said with a disparaging snort, “as if ye’ve been thinking much of me at any rate, what with yer new husband and all.”

Beth climbed down the porch steps, slipped her arm through Ian’s, and tugged him forward. “You’re right. I’ve been selfish and inconsiderate. Let’s take a walk and talk. It seems you’ve got as much to tell me as I have to tell you.”

Ian arched a dark brow. “Aye, from the little I overheard as I came up, I’d say ye most certainly do. And where would we be heading on this wee walk, if ye don’t mind me asking?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” She looked around. “How about the pines up on the hill behind Devlin and Hannah’s house? We always enjoyed our times up there, talking and playing games.”

“Aye, that we did, Elizabeth.” Ian smiled in remembrance.

“We had such verra good times together, didn’t we?”

She laughed. “Yes, and a few times when we had
too
good a time and got everyone all riled about us.” Beth squeezed his arm. “You were the first boy who ever kissed me, you know.”

“Indeed?” Ian chuckled. “Well, that’s something I’ll always have over Noah, then, isn’t it? Not that I wouldn’t rather have the girl herself, mind ye, but it’s a wee consolation.”

“You’ll always be one of my best friends, Ian. Always.”

“I’m glad for that, Elizabeth. Truly, I am.”

They walked for a while in silence, passing Devlin and Hannah’s house, climbing the grassy hill that, the higher they went, became more and more densely inhabited with the rough, gray-barked ponderosa pines. Finally, they came upon a fallen log. After taking their seats, Beth turned to Ian.

“So, you first,” she said. “I’m not really the reason you’ve decided to leave Culdee Creek so soon, am I?”

Ian paused to watch a sooty-headed and dark-blue-bodied Steller’s jay hop overhead from branch to branch, its harsh
shack-shack-shack
call a familiar sound in the coniferous forest. Beth glanced up and grinned. As if realizing it had been discovered, the big bird quieted suddenly and glanced down at them. Then, after another round of now indignant calls, it took wing and flew away.

Ian turned to her, one corner of his mouth twisting upward in amusement. “Kind of reminds ye of me, doesn’t it?” he asked. “A big, noisy bird who flies in, makes a ruckus, then flies out. It’s all I know, though, Elizabeth. There’s just something calling me, calling me to the next place with its promise of something better.”

“Is there anything better than home and family, Ian?”

“Mayhap not, lass.” He smiled sadly. “I used to think so when it was just Claire and me all those many years ago in Scotland. And I’ve been happy here at Culdee Creek most times. But I don’t know when I’ll settle down and get this daft wanderlust out of me.”

Beth laughed. “And here I was, taking your bout of jealousy over Noah so seriously.”

“Aye, I did make a bit of a scene, didn’t I, when ye first told me?” He took her hand, lifted it to his lips, and kissed it. “In truth, as much as I love ye, Elizabeth,” Ian said, lowering her hand, “I wonder if I could’ve even settled down with ye. I fear . . . I fear it may not even be in me ever to make such a commitment.”

“Don’t sell yourself short, Ian. You’re a man of high principles and capable of a deep and lasting love. All you need is to find the right woman and all your fears will be over.” Beth gave his hand a quick squeeze, then disengaged her hand from his clasp. “Just have a care. Don’t miss that lass when she finally comes your way. Don’t get so caught up in the joy of the treasure hunt that you don’t recognize the treasure when you find it.”

“Aye,” he said with a nod, “ye’re right, of course. I’ll have a care, that I will.” He leaned down, picked up a bit of broken tree branch, and tossed it back down the hill where they had come. “And now that we’ve solved the mystery of my leaving, what about ye? What kind of wisdom were ye seeking from yer parents, when it comes to yer husband?”

Beth looked away and sighed. “Noah’s thinking about taking a teaching position at his old seminary in New York City. I love him dearly, but I don’t want to leave here.” She turned back to him. “This is my home. This is where I belong.”

“Ye belong where yer true family is, lass, and Noah’s now yer family. Ye must cleave to him above all others.” A look of compassion gleamed in his eyes. “Still, to be sure, it’s a heart-wrenching dilemma.”

“Yes, it is.” Beth drew in a deep breath, then slowly expelled it. “We haven’t been married a month, Ian, and then Noah goes and stuns me with this. It isn’t fair. It just isn’t fair!”

“And who said marriage was fair, or even a fifty-fifty split most of the time?” Ian laughed. “Why do ye think I shy away from it like I do, lass? For all its fine advantages, the cost of making a marriage work is still more than I yet care to pay.”

“Well, why didn’t you warn me about that beforehand?” she asked irritably. “All you said was I wasn’t cut out to be a preacher’s wife.”

“Och, and as if ye would’ve listened to me at any rate!” Ian rolled his eyes. “Ye’ve been so head over heels in love with Noah Starr for years now. And seeing him as the perfect man that he is, leastwise in yer love-struck eyes, ye wouldn’t have thought aught could ever be a problem no matter who was telling ye the opposite. So don’t blame me for the fine mess ye’ve now gotten yerself into, lass.” He shook his head vehemently. “Nay, don’t blame me.”

He was right. Nonetheless, Beth still hated to admit it. What she needed now was sympathy, not recriminations.

“Fine. Have it your way, Ian Sutherland,” she snapped. “You always do in the end anyway. I just want to commend you, though, for your compassion and understanding.” She climbed to her feet. “I think I’ll be going now, thank you very much.”

Before she could take two steps, Ian leaped up and grabbed her hand. “Och, lass, don’t go on like that. Ye know I care. I just don’t see what’s to be done for yer problem, save talk with yer husband and try to convince him to stay.”

“But that’s just the problem, Ian.” Once again, Beth sighed. “I don’t know why he’s suddenly so interested in a position he’s turned down once already. If I knew, maybe I could—”

“Och, I think ye know, Elizabeth,” Ian said. “Search yer heart, and I’d wager the answers are all there. And if they aren’t, I’d wager they’re just as unclear in Noah’s mind, too. Ye’ve only then to talk with him and help him discover the truth. And once the truth’s come to the forefront, ye can both face the answer head on.”

Help him discover the truth
 
.
 
.
 
.

Strange, Beth mused, but Ian’s advice was almost the same as Abby’s had been. Was this, then, what the Lord was urging? Beth knew God often spoke through His children. He had done it so many times for Noah through Millie.

Her thoughts flitted briefly to Noah’s aunt. Stand at my side, Millie, she thought, when I talk with Noah. And Lord, put the right words in my mouth. Open my own ears and heart to what Noah says. So I may truly hear him and understand. So I may be the wife and partner he needs.

Beth managed a tremulous smile. “It’s time we were getting back. I need to head home.”

“Aye, lass, that ye do,” Ian said, releasing her hand. “Yer man needs ye.”

Noah came home that night just after supper. Beth had Emily in her bathtub and was entertaining the little girl by playing patty-cake with her. Emily chortled each time the game ended, begging for more. Beth would laugh, then repeat the rhythmic hand clapping and poem. As she did, Noah noted, standing quietly in the entryway shadows, she was gradually encouraging Emily to try different things.

The realization gladdened him. Perhaps there was indeed some hope for his daughter. Perhaps the horrible events of her birth might yet find some positive resolution. Noah felt a tiny ray of hope glimmer in his heart.

And it was all because of Beth. She had never treated Emily as any less than a normal child. She seemed to see past the outward disabilities to the heart and soul beneath.

It was more than he had ever been able to do. As much as he loved his daughter, Noah knew he had always viewed her in terms of her palsied limitations. He had let his guilt and pain cloud his perceptions.

But the guilt and pain had faded, burned away by the bright radiance of Beth’s presence in his life. Thanks to her, bit by bit, his perspective about many things was changing.

Love for the beautiful woman kneeling there in the kitchen rose up and overwhelmed him, drenching him with such a piercing joy he almost cried out from the sweet pain. Instead, Noah strode into the kitchen, hurrying to his wife’s side.

She lifted her face for a kiss. “Your supper’s in the warming oven,” she said. “I’m just finishing with Emily’s bath. Enjoy your meal while I take her upstairs and get her ready for bed.”

“I hate to miss so much of her growing up.” Noah walked to the stove, opened the warming-oven door, and retrieved his plateful of food. “I’m glad the seminary job will provide me with a much more regular schedule and hours. I’m looking forward to having more time to spend with you and Emily.”

Beth shot him an enigmatic glance. “You talk as if you’ve made up your mind.”

“Well, I have. All I’m waiting on is your agreement to send back a letter of acceptance.”

“And if I don’t agree?” she asked, wrapping a towel around Emily and lifting her from the tub. “What then, Noah?”

He frowned in puzzlement. “Well, I guess we’ll need to talk about it. I’ve just been waiting for your decision and trying to be patient in the doing.”

“Well, your patience has been rewarded. We’ll talk, just as soon as I put Emily to bed.”

Plate in hand, Noah watched Beth leave with his daughter, a sense of foreboding rising within him. This apparently wasn’t going to be an easy discussion. If the look in his wife’s eyes wasn’t enough of a warning, the tone of her voice certainly was. She didn’t want to leave Grand View, and she wasn’t going to do so without a fight.

With a sigh, Noah collected a knife and fork from the cupboard’s silverware drawer and carried his plate to the table. The pork chops, mashed potatoes and gravy, and spinach salad from the last spinach plants in the garden were good, but he found himself picking at his food. His mind was just too preoccupied with what Beth would say, and how he might convince her moving back East was God’s will for them.

At long last, Beth reentered the kitchen. Noah glanced up from the cup of coffee he had just poured himself after cleaning his plate and washing it. Relief filled him. Beth’s expression was pleasant, if a bit guarded.

“Would you like a cup of coffee?” he asked, standing. “I could get you—”

She motioned him back into his seat. “Sit. I’m already up and can get my own coffee.”

Noah complied and watched as his wife took down a mug, walked back to the stove, and poured herself a steaming cup of coffee. Then, after adding a generous dollop of cream from the creamer in the icebox, she pulled out a chair at the kitchen table across from him.

“So,” Noah began as Beth sat, pulled over the sugar bowl, and proceeded to stir a teaspoonful of sugar into her coffee, “you said you’re ready to talk about the seminary position. How do you feel about it?”

Beth laid aside her teaspoon and took a tentative sip of her coffee. “I think it’s a wonderful offer, Noah, and one you richly deserve,” she said. “However, that said, I’m against you accepting it.”