Captivated (10 page)

Life at the orchard is pretty quiet, except for Annie and her driving. Oh and I think Sarah fancies one of the boys working on the Sinclair's farm. Mr. Sinclair hired a few boys to help with Joe gone. One is older, a couple of years older than you I'd guess. He's really quiet and shy, but she blushes something fierce whenever he brings a bushel of vegetables to the house. Yesterday, she made three cobblers, to make sure she had at least one that tasted good to give him. I wish you were here to make jokes about it with me. I miss you! Let me know how you're doing, please!

Love,

Katie

Chapter 8

December 23, 1943

December 1, 1943

Dear Lilli,

I know mail really slows during the holidays, so let me start by saying Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I'm not sure when you will get this, hopefully it is before Christmas. I only wish I could send you a gift, then watch you open it. I love picking out the perfect present for someone, and then I love to watch their reaction when they open it. My sisters usually yell at me for staring on Christmas day, but I can't help but be excited.

On the same day I received your letter, I also received a letter from my sister, Katie. She didn't say anything about a gentleman friend, but she did tell me about Sarah's new beau. He works on a nearby farm and is really shy. Katie says she is really smitten, and blushes whenever he comes around. I'm going to have to write to all three of my sisters to find out more about him. There's got to be a reason he's not fighting in the war, and I'd love to know what it is. I'd like to know a lot of other things too, it's the protective instinct. I'll find out, somehow or another.

You, are beautiful, absolutely stunning. Thank you for sending your picture, it is better than any Christmas gift! I can't help but stare at it in my free time. Your letters are more vivid now with your face in my mind while I read. I've re-read every letter you've written with your picture beside me. I can't wait to watch your hair blowing in the breeze, or your eyelashes fluttering. I think it's fairly safe to say that you will be taking root in my dreams from now on.

I hope the picture I sent is alright. I don't have any pictures of me by myself here in camp. Those are my two best friends with me in the picture, you'll find the names on the back. It is getting more and more cold here in France. I'm hoping they'll be bringing in some blankets soon. The nights are especially cold. I wonder how much longer this war will last. I am ready to come home, and so are all of the other men here. When I am home, I'll cherish every moment of being with you and my family.

Enjoy your holiday's Lilli, I know how much you enjoy them, know that I am thinking about you.

Still Captivated

"Wow," Viv sighed, putting down the letter. "Where's the picture? I need to see the picture." She reached toward Lilli and pulled a string of gum from her mouth, twirling it around a finger.

"Here, he's on the left."

"Goodness, he's dreamy! I only managed to catch a glimpse of the side of his face when he asked you out at Judy and Pete's. I'm so glad I forced you to go out with him! He's perfect for you."

"I think he might be too." Lilli blushed, falling into a nearby pillow.

"His friends are pretty handsome too, maybe you can introduce me to the blonde when they get home."

Lilli took the picture from Viv again and flipped it over, reading the name on the back. "Sam Carter," she sighed, "I think he may have been killed, Joe doesn't mention him, not even when I ask."

"Then, you can introduce me to the other one...he's cute, and alive."

"You're terrible!"

"Yes, yes I am, but a dead soldier doesn't do me much good." Viv smiled, mischievously.

"No, I guess you're right. A dead soldier wouldn't do me any good either. Gosh, I pray he comes home safe every day."

"This is why I don't invest in long term relationships with these guys. I go to the U.S.O, dance a little, smooch a little and go home. That's what you should have done instead of all this letter writing. You don't even get to kiss this man, and you're more attached to him than you are to your own parents!" Viv squealed, coming to her feet in exasperation. She had been making these kinds of comments through their entire relationship. But, Lilli had the feeling that Viv was a little envious of what she had going with Joe. And, she didn't care about kissing him now, all the letters would make it easier to fall into his arms as soon as he stepped off that boat.

"You know I would have never gotten very far at the U.S.O. I've never been kissed, I would never have let a different drunken soldier slobber on me every night. Besides, I'd be so nervous and shy, I wouldn't even talk to anyone. I'd sit at a table in the corner sipping a club soda, watching you have a good time."

"That's true, it did take you two months before you spoke to me, and we lived in the same room!" Viv laughed, which got Lilli giggling on her bed. It took a while to control the laughter the memory caused, and when they composed themselves, Viv took a step toward Lilli. Her face became serious and she tilted her head. She looked...concerned, a look Lilli had only remembered seeing twice before in their five year relationship.

"Lil, I just really don't want you to get hurt. You deserve your perfect man, I hope all of it works out. Not to mention, your mother hates him which is enough to make me root for him."

"My mother really does hate him... She doesn't want me to live on a farm, where I might have to be in the sun for part of my life."

"Do you love him?"

"I love thinking about him, I love reading his letters, I love imagining him coming home and seeing him for the first time. But, how can I be
in
love with a man I've only had one conversation with?"

"You've had more than one conversation with him, they just haven't involved your voices." Viv corrected.

"He could be very different in real life. He might not be who I think he is." Lilli crumpled, resting her head against the bedpost.

"Or, he could be the man you've always dreamed of." Viv sat beside her on the bed, curling next to her. "Hey, what if he comes back missing a finger?"

"What?" Lilli laughed.

"You know, he's in a war. What if he comes back missing something, like a finger, or a leg, or an eye! Do you think you'll still like him? Honestly, do you think you could sleep with a man with one leg? Or a guy who could never hold your hand if you were standing on his left side?" Viv let out an uncontrolled laugh that sounded like a cackle, she clearly thought herself very funny.

"You're horrible! Of course I would still like him! I'm not interested in his legs, or his arms, or his pinkie finger! I'm interested in who he is, and as long as the war doesn't touch his soul too much I'll be very happy to spend every day of the rest of my life with him."

"Come on, it will take some getting used to if his eye socket is just a big empty hole!"

Lilli started to laugh, the picture in her mind becoming more and more ridiculous. "It might take some getting used to..."she managed to squeak out. "But nothing could change the way I feel about him."

Lilli picked the picture up again, gazing at Joe again, running a finger over his handsome face, pretending she was really touching his stubble covered chin. He looked so happy, so full of life in the picture. Surely he would return home the same way, despite the cruelty of all he would see and hear in the war, he would come back the man she knew. She was worried, worried that he would be different, worried that he wouldn't come home at all. That was the reason she couldn't let herself believe that she loved him. If she loved him, everything would change, so much more would rest upon things she could not control. And then, if she lost him, would it not be more difficult if he was the first man she ever loved?

Viv noticed the clouded look on Lilli's face and proceeded to fill her ears with talk about her boys from the U.S.O. It amazed Lilli that Viv hadn't been tempted to deepen her relationships with any of the handsome soldiers yet. Then again, Viv liked her fun, she always had, and settling down would mean an end to all of that. If Viv ever found her perfect man, she wouldn't be able to get enough of him. She would think about him every waking moment, as often as Lilli thought of Joe.

Chapter 9

December 31, 1943

"Lillian, guests will be arriving in ten minutes, please tell me you're almost ready." Mrs. Windsor said with breathless frustration outside of Lilli's bedroom.

"I've been ready for twenty minutes, I'm reading until the guests arrive." Lilli answered calmly, ready for the storm that was to come. Every year she tried to stay out of her mother's way until the guests arrived, and every year, she failed. Mother always managed to find her at the last moment, making her do some ridiculous chore in her dress and high heels, or primping her for a handsome young gentleman who was coming. Now, the only question was, which storm would come.

"Come downstairs and help me. You and your father are no help! Reading while I'm running around like a crazy person! You would think that no one else enjoys this party, if no one else enjoys it, why do we even have one? I could certainly do without all the business! I had better not have to come looking for you again young lady"

Lilli sighed and put a book mark in her new book, a Christmas gift from her Grandmother. She straightened her black dress before going downstairs, she was in no rush, this was her least favorite night of the year. At least she had managed to get Viv invited this year. Viv promised to be early, Lilli peered anxiously out of the kitchen window as she walked past, hoping to see the platinum blonde hair of her best friend.

"Lillian, what are you doing? Come and open the sparkling cider, pour a few glasses so they're ready for the first guests. When you've finished that, turn off the stove, the coffee should be finished. Pour the coffee in the carafe, then start another pot, do you think you can manage that?"

"Yes Mother."

"Good, now where is your father?" she said, sweeping back out of the kitchen in a flurry.

Lilli shook her head and set to work. Pouring the cider was easy enough, she only misjudged the foam in one glass, which spilled all over. It was a good thing her mother wasn't watching over her shoulder. She would have been flapping around, squealing like some kind of distressed bird. Lilli quickly cleaned up the mess and continued with her assignments. When she was measuring the grounds for the second pot of coffee, the first guest arrived. Much to her own dismay, it was not Viv.

Lilli slowed down considerably when she heard a male voice. She knew her mother would never bring a guest into the kitchen because it looked cluttered, she was safe here for now. The door opened three more times before Lilli had finished with the coffee. Instead of joining the guests, she began to arrange the appetizers on the trays set out by her mother. The fourth time the door opened, children's voices echoed in the hallway. Lilli dropped her dishtowel and went to greet the O'Connors.

"You came! I'm so glad." she smiled, pulling all three children into a simultaneous hug.

"We thought Bridget was old enough this year, but she might need to borrow a bed at one point." Colleen smiled, placing a loving hand on her daughters head.