Butterfly Swords (10 page)

‘I know little about her family, but I know they’re loyal to Emperor Shen,’ he said.

‘And so am I,’ she insisted.

He looked over at his cup of wine. Picking it up, he tossed it down, relishing the familiar burn as the alcohol slid down his throat. He was going to need much more to relax the tension twisting his stomach.

‘With all the talk of unrest and rebellion, Changan has become a dangerous place for barbarians like me,’ he explained.

‘Dangerous for everyone.’

She leaned forwards, her perpetually serene expression replaced with a shrewd look. He decided not to tell her of the smuggled weapons and his confrontation in the southern province. It was best to keep Ailey and Lady Ling as far away from that as possible.

‘I need to ask for your help. Ailey needs to get home to her father, but I can’t take her.’

‘You want me to go with her to Changan?’

He passed a hand over his temples. Occasionally his head would ache, the tension centred above the scar from his head wound. He wondered if it was a phantom reminder or was he not yet healed.

The plan had come to him only hours earlier. Ling could escort Ailey without having to hide in muddy river banks and forest groves. Her escort wouldn’t be accosted by imperial soldiers the moment they reached the capital. She could use whatever contacts she had to get Ailey home.

And, most importantly, Ailey wouldn’t be shunned when she was seen returning with Lady Ling. He had weighed the strength of his sword against the rest and the answer was easy.

‘She will not be happy,’ Ling said quietly.

‘I know, but this is the only way.’ His fingers curled into a fist as he said it.

‘Where will you go then? Back to Yumen Guan?’

He nodded.

Ling folded her hands in front of her, fingers entwined. ‘You surprise me.’

‘How so?’

‘I did not think you would sacrifice something you wanted so easily.’

There was an unfamiliar tightening in his chest. ‘It’s not a sacrifice.’

He had planned to leave Ailey with her family once they reached Changan anyway. What difference did it make if they parted several days earlier? He’d have to tell her when they were alone and make her see that this was the best decision. The only decision.

Ling’s almond eyes slid over him, urging his secrets to the surface. It was said she could captivate a man with a single look, but the face he kept seeing was Ailey’s.

‘There is another reason you are so eager to part with her. You’re afraid.’

He leaned back, willing to let the lady have her fun.

‘Certainly. She has four brothers with swords who would not be too happy to find their youngest sister travelling alone with a barbarian.’

‘You were never afraid of men with swords.’ She tapped a nail against the table thoughtfully. ‘She looks at you with such adoration, completely infatuated. What a powerful temptation that must be.’

‘Nothing has happened.’

So he had kissed her twice and nearly lost control both times. Nothing worth dwelling upon.

Her lips curved. ‘I believe you that nothing has happened. Otherwise, you would not burn for her so. Unrequited love.’ She sighed.

The thought of having Ailey sent a flood of heat between his legs, but it wouldn’t be enough to fill the even deeper ache within him. And it simply wasn’t going to happen.

‘She is a pretty girl,’ he said casually. ‘One of many pretty girls.’

‘Yes, I remember. You wreaked havoc among the palace girls.’

‘I don’t remember it quite like that.’

Ling leaned forwards, a tigress on the prowl. She was enjoying herself. ‘You feel guilty being here with me while she’s not here, yet you have not so much as touched my hand. Tell me, do you remember every single time you’ve touched her? Are you thinking of her right now?’

It was useless to try not to think of Ailey. He conjured up the softness of her skin, her arms wrapped around his neck, even the stubborn tilt of her chin whenever she faced a situation she didn’t like. He was going to see that bit of wilfulness again very soon.

‘Why are you so concerned?’

‘I was worried you would let a pretty face cloud your judgement, but clearly you have the situation under control.’

Completely under control. He grabbed his wine and swallowed it down. The servants had been diligent about keeping the cups filled.

‘We two are so very similar,’ she said softly. ‘You want women to fall at your feet, but you cannot stand to be at anyone’s mercy.’

He traced a fingertip over the edge of the table. ‘But I’m completely at your mercy right now.’

‘You are not.’ Her eyes sparkled. ‘I would know. You’ve always kept yourself apart, beholden to no one.’

Maybe everything she said was true. All the more reason to let Ailey go, untouched. ‘Can I trust you to get her home safely?’

A shadow of sadness crossed her face. It was the only sincere emotion she’d allowed to escape the entire evening. ‘I do owe you a debt. This may be my one chance to repay it.’

‘Thank you.’

It was done. This was a woman who had survived assassination and rebellion. She would be able to protect Ailey much better than he could. When he’d been given command of that shipment, he had known he wasn’t the right man for the task. He’d gone through with it blindly and lost everything. He’d be damned if he let the same thing happen again. The hollowness he felt inside must have meant he was making the right decision.

He finished the last of the wine and stood, the emptiness threatening to swallow him. Now he had to go and tell her.

T
he sound of movement brought Ryam out to the side of the house. A shadow wove through the peach trees, wielding butterfly swords. Only Ailey would be working through fighting forms late into the night. She broke the pattern as he reached the railing and then continued without glancing his way. Moonlight flashed off the blades as they whirled through the darkness.

He couldn’t hold back his smile. ‘Were you waiting for me?’

She stopped and kept her gaze focused ahead, breathing hard from the exercise. ‘I’m training.’

He braced a hand against the rail and leapt over it, his feet landing solidly on the bare ground.

‘It’s late,’ he said.

‘Yes. It is.’

With a flick of her wrists, she lowered the swords and turned to him. Experience told him he wouldn’t be able to leave until Ailey got the confrontation she wanted.

‘Did you have a pleasant dinner?’ she asked.

‘Yes, I did.’ He folded his arms over his chest to brace himself for battle. ‘You left rather quickly.’

‘Is Lady Ling the type of woman you prefer?’

He’d been thinking quite a bit about what sort of woman it was that he preferred. Ailey argued the same way she fought—with clean, precise cuts. Her skin glistened from the exertion and her hair hung in loose strands that framed her face.

‘Lady Ling could tear a man to pieces and he would beg for more.’

Her mouth drew tight. ‘You like her.’

‘When I’m not afraid of her.’

She swung away to start another drill, her braid whipping over her shoulder. Her movements lacked their usual fluid grace. The flow of energy was disrupted, the Chinese would say. He watched her with perverse pleasure. She wouldn’t have him, but there was hell to pay if any other woman came near. He should have been too jaded to be aroused by jealousy, but from Ailey he loved it.

‘Is there something you want to say to me?’ he asked.

‘Nothing at all.’

Her swords cut through empty space. She was probably imagining him in front of them. Now was definitely not the time to tell her what he and Ling had decided.

‘Your swordplay is quite aggressive,’ he said. ‘Surprising, for someone your size.’

She lifted her eyes to him. ‘It’s the best way against a larger adversary.’

‘Interesting.’

The drill came to a stop as she turned to him, her stance guarded and tense with challenge. He would miss that quiet fire. The journey out of the empire seemed to stretch out an eternity now that he knew he would travel the rest of the way alone.

He ventured forwards, keeping his attention on the butterfly swords. Ailey had an even temper, but she did have an impulsive streak.

‘Show me,’ he said.

She hesitated, but lowered her weapons. It was good thinking on his part to distract the both of them.

‘A large fighter would want to hold his opponent back where he has the advantage. When I move within arm’s reach…’

She demonstrated by stepping close and the scent of her hair drifted to him, mysterious and feminine. His heartbeat quickened.

Fellow swordsmen, he’d sworn. Ridiculous. He only had to look at Ailey to want her. Every movement sang of strength and hinted at her passionate spirit.

‘It becomes difficult for you to strike,’ she finished absently. When she tilted her chin upwards they were nearly face to face. She was standing closer to him than she needed for this demonstration.

Not as close as he wanted.

The corner of his mouth lifted. ‘I could just grab you.’

‘That’s why I have these.’ Her blade shot up between them.

He laughed and she joined in, the sound of it washing warm over him. Between the lanterns and the moonlight, her face radiated confidence and sensuality with a touch of innocence, the same combination that had caught his attention from the first moment at the roadside tavern.

‘Here, let me show you,’ she said suddenly.

She reached down to pull the sash loose from her waist. The sane part of his mind knew she wasn’t undressing for him under the night sky, but the hint of it was enough to make him stiffen.

She stood on her toes. ‘Lower your head. You’re too tall.’

He bent down and closed his eyes as she placed the sash over them, tying it securely around the back of his head. Her jasmine scent caressed over him and her fingertips brushed lightly against his ear as she straightened. His skin prickled with awareness, sensitised to her every movement as he was engulfed in darkness.

‘You train blindfolded?’ he asked.

She laughed, sounding so close. ‘This is how you train your touch reflexes. It’s called
chi sao
.’

‘You are a constant surprise,’ he murmured.

He strained to listen for her through the whisper of the breeze, his vision blocked. She took hold of his hands and he let himself be led. Her skin was flushed from training. He found it incredibly sensual, waiting in the dark as she positioned his arms into a guard.

‘Stay relaxed. Try to maintain the contact when I move.’

Her voice was intimate, soothing. He could feel the line of her wrist, the tension in her arm as she pushed against him.

‘Ready?’

‘Yes.’

‘Slowly first.’

She moved and he followed her, turning his body to keep her in front of him. When the pressure withdrew, he sought her out, shifting his feet to maintain contact.

‘Keep with me.’

She guided him with her touch, testing him forwards and back. They stepped side to side; each time he used the contact against her arm to gauge how she moved. Gradually she quickened the pace, using different patterns, breaking the rhythm so he would have to adjust.

‘How does this help you fight?’ he asked.

‘Touch allows me to read an opponent faster than seeing him. Every time I deflect a strike, I can read your movements. If you push too hard, you will over-commit. If your touch is too light, I can sense an opening.’

It had been a long time since anyone had tried to teach him anything about the art of the sword, not since his father’s death. But he couldn’t fully concentrate on the technique. Her voice flowed over him like water, his awareness heightened by the blindfold.

‘Let me try it,’ he said devilishly.

His movements became more aggressive. He pushed forwards. Attack and retreat. She responded, her movements complementing his, the ebb and flow of her breathing increasing with the rhythm. He could hear the soft pad of her footsteps against the ground. A dance in the darkness.

It would be that way if they made love. Completely attuned to each other’s bodies through simple touch and tension. He sensed it in his soul as heat and energy pumped through his veins.

He stopped abruptly and let go of her, reaching up to remove the blindfold. Ailey came back into view.

She blinked at him. ‘Why are you stopping?’

He sucked in a breath. ‘Do you even know what you do to me?’

She could entice him to madness without even trying. With a combat exercise, of all things. Sooner or later, he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off of her. And when he gave in to his need, he wouldn’t know how to let go.

‘You’re not for me, Ailey.’

She shook her head. ‘I don’t understand.’

He needed to get this done. Ailey respected directness and honesty and he didn’t have any time to squander. By morning, he would be gone.

‘I spoke with Lady Ling. She can escort you the rest of the way to Changan.’

The light drained from her as she looked at him, silent and stricken. The urge to put his arms around her was overwhelming, but he forced himself back. That would be the easy thing to do. Hold her close and take away the sudden chill that had set in between them.

‘So this is what the two of you have decided?’ she asked.

‘You should be accompanied by someone like her. Someone respectable.’

Not by a barbarian who would drag her into ruin. Ailey had her own honour and her family’s reputation to uphold. Even he knew these things.

‘You promised.’ She was grasping and they both knew it.

‘I told you I would get you home safely. That’s all.’

His voice sounded too loud among the peach trees. She was the one who’d made him swear not to touch her, and he’d kept his word despite being an irresponsible bastard.

‘In a few days you’ll be home,’ he went on. ‘We were always planning to go our own ways in Changan.’

Her lip trembled, but she fought hard to control it. Methodically, she bent and returned one sword after the other into the sheaths.

‘You are right. You have no obligation to me. But I don’t trust Lady Ling and I won’t go with her.’

He was ready for this. ‘
I
trust her. Ling Suyin is a friend. She owes me a debt.’

Her pained expression told him he had pierced her armour. Ailey lived by honour. It ran thick in every drop of her blood.

‘She won’t let any harm come to you. I swear it.’

‘You’ll go tomorrow, then?’ she asked tightly.

‘Yes.’

He had to leave while he still could.

She held his gaze for a long time, unflinching. He could see himself reflected as tiny spots of light in her irises. He would never know what it was she saw in him. Then, with a nod, she walked past him. Her shoulder brushed stiffly against his arm as she retreated from the orchard.

Warrior pride.

She slipped into her room, the door creaking shut. He had known she wouldn’t plead or throw a tantrum. In a way, she’d made his announcement dreadfully easy on him.

He stayed in the orchard until the servants came to extinguish the lanterns, blowing out the candles one by one.

Ailey closed her bedroom door behind her and leaned against it. Before she could compose herself, a tear slid down her cheek, followed by another. She swiped at them angrily with the back of one hand.

She couldn’t grasp her own emotions, didn’t understand the feeling of loss as if something had been ripped from inside her. Ryam was right. They were going to separate in Changan. It shouldn’t make any difference for them to part now. But she had thought she would have a little more time. Time for what, she didn’t know.

She moved to the bed and lay down, twisting her hands into the coverlet. Ever since they’d kissed by the river she’d lost all ability to centre herself. Even their sparring exercise had become an excuse for her to touch him.

In the empty spaces between their conversations, she would imagine Ryam staying by her side. They would never reach the capital. But it was nothing but a childish fantasy. She had a duty to her family and to the empire.

She could have argued with Ryam and convinced him not to go just yet. She could have reached up and kissed him as she had been fantasising about the entire day. He might have just laughed at her if she had. Or he might have kissed her back, as he had done in the woods.

She took a deep breath and let it out. He was a wandering swordsman. She was a princess. What did she think they’d do? Cross swords and wander through the forest for ever? If he was determined to go, she wasn’t going to stop him. This was best. She would never have to tell Ryam who she was.

But part of her wished she’d dared to tell him the truth. She wished that she didn’t have to hold anything back. That they would never have to swear to anything, except what they truly wanted.