Broken Desires (14 page)

She forgot all about her fear
and anger when he buried his mouth right on her pussy and kissed it with a slow tenderness, his tongue gliding in and out of her, licking her clit with lazy circles. She watched him between her legs, watched his lips buried in her folds, watched him suck one petal, then the other before brushing his mouth side to side, feeling her lips with his. She croaked out his name and he groaned, his kiss on her privates turning passionate with hungry sounds. He sucked her clit into his mouth and her body bucked. “Oh Jesus,” she cried. “Shit, not Jesus.” She pumped her hips and moaned, “Don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop.” She was desperate for the fire he built so perfectly.

****

Daniel was losing control. But not in the way he’d expected. Sofia orgasmed so beautifully on his mouth but it felt all wrong. Incomplete. He needed to touch her. No, fuck, he needed her to touch him, he realized. His hands trembled as he untied her. As soon as she was free, she lunged up and embraced him. He caught her and helped her climb onto his waist. “I need you Daniel.”

God, he needed her too. He buried his cock in her, pulling her head back to feast on her neck like he loved. He wanted to kiss her. And yet his body locked up at the idea and her cries in his ear made him forget why. His back hit the wall and he held her waist as she rode him so gloriously. She made him forget his past, his future, there was only her, only Sofia all over him, inside him, around him.

The world became hazy then white as his orgasm rocked him. Her moans peaked to near desperate cries and she held onto him, mouth buried in his neck, nails digging as her sweet body came with him.

Daniel
never had orgasms like that. So intense, so…fucking…overwhelming.

“I love you,” she whispered in his ear.

Daniel froze as things stopped. Time first. Then sound. Then feeling. Everything just stopped. Only nothing, empty, and dead, remained.

Hid
mind flailed in the endless expanse of dark. Oh God. Oh fuck. What was she doing to him? Everything he knew to the deepest part of his bones seemed to be ripped out from his brain stem. And now he was falling. Falling into a black nothing. No ground in sight.

Panic hit like a train wreck and logic and reasoning vanished like it’d never existed. He blindly put Sofia down and stumbled around, his body feeling like it’d been detached from whatever gave him the ability to walk.

“Daniel? Are you okay?”

Her voice echoed in his mind. His life flashed.
You’ll fuck who I damn well want you to, you little piece of shit. They pay good money for your sorry little ass, now get back to work, you lazy sonofabitch.

“Fuck you. Fuck you,” he moaned.

“Daniel!”

He stared at Sofia, finally realizing it was her. She didn’t belong in his life. What was he thinking? He couldn’t…he couldn’t. “Please go. Fuck,” he gasped. “Fucking go! I don’t want you here.” He pushed her away, unable to stand being touched.

She sobbed and stumbled back.

Fury ignited in his blood and he began breaking whatever his hand touched.
Leave me alone.
That’s all he knew, that’s all he heard, roaring through his head, his mind, and out of his mouth until he was hoarse. Then he was sitting against the wall, alone, gasping the words like a fervent prayer.
Just leave me…alone.

****

Sofia cried as she ran home in his shirt and her jeans. Why? Why did he do that? What happened? Why did loving him have to be so bad? Why couldn’t her love heal him? Why did it have to hurt him? Why?

A week went by with no contact. Sofia cried in her room when she wasn’t taking care of Gammie. She ignored all calls and didn’t get online. No, that wasn’t true, she ignored all calls that weren’t him. And every call that wasn’t him, cut her, confirmed the worst. Again she cursed herself for falling so hard and so quick for a man. Stupid stupid girl.

The second week, the flowers came. Beautiful white tulips with a
Forgive Me
note. She did the right thing. She threw them out. But they continued to come every day for another week until she chewed her nails with indecision. What did he want from her? To kill her? She couldn’t help him. She wasn’t able, she cared too fucking much. She finally went and taped a note to his door. “I forgive you. Stop sending flowers. Thank you.”

The bastard stopped sending them. It infuriated her. Giving up so soon? Of course he was.

Then Jason called and again she did the right thing and she took Dara’s advice, and agreed to go on a date with him. And it was when she returned back from the store the same day of said date that Gammie’s sitter, Amelie, met her at the door. “You have company,” she whispered. “A man!” Like that was some phenomenon.

Sofia’s heart banged painfully.
Jason came early. Shit. “Where?”

“He’s sitting with your grandmother,” she whispered.

Oh how sweet. She made her way to her grandmother’s room and went in.

“Sofi, now where have you been hiding this young man? I hope not in your closet, skeletons go there and this man is not a skeleton.”

Daniel laughed next to her grandmother’s bed, his eyes twinkling up at Sofi as she made her way to her grandmother’s bed in wide eyed what the fuck are you doing here shock. 

“Are you all getting married?” her grandmother asked.
“Cause Sofia needs a husband.”

Sofia got too close to Daniel and he pulled her into his lap. Her stomach fluttered violently, and her body went crazy at making contact with his. She tried to get up but Daniel’s hold was uncompromising. She smiled at
her grandmother. “Noooo Gammie, he’s just my…my good friend.”

Daniel lifted Sofia’s hand and kissed her palm. “Very good friend.”

Shit, what was he doing? He wrapped his arms around her then and oh my God, she never knew something so simple as an embrace could feel so flipping fantastic.

Gammie’s head wobbled as she spoke. “You two look like soul mates.” She nodded, more head wobbling. “That there is when two people meet and
no matter how unmatched they are, they fit so tight, nothing can break that connection.” She turned her pale gaze away. “You all know what I’m saying?”

“Yes,” they both said. She wanted to elbow him for fucking barging in
there and forcing all this, while her body betrayed her and enjoyed every second of it.

Gammie clapped her hands once and laid back on her pillow. “Well then my work on this earth is surely over.”

Sofia’s heart skipped a beat as she stared at her grandmother. “Gammie, what?”

“I been stickin around here for Sofi,” she explained to Daniel. “She never had
anybody good and I couldn’t bear leaving her all alone.”

Daniel tightened his embrace
and Sofia realized her grandmother took their understanding of what soul mate meant for agreeing they were. The thought of her grandmother suddenly leaving her, now or anytime soon, made her stomach lurch. Sofia wiped the tears from her face. “Gammie, soul mate or not, I need you in my life.”

“Bah!” she flicked a hand at her. “Nobody needs a decrepit old woman in their lives
, Sofi Ann.”

“I do. Now stop talking about leaving me. Please. My life wouldn’t be the same without you.”

“No, it’d be a hell of a lot easier.”

“Stay a little longer, Rachel. I would love to get to know you.”

He’d addressed her by her real name. That fucking bastard sweetheart.

Her
grandmother’s eyes brightened like a teenager on her first date. “Well,” she said, clearly flattered. “Guess a few more years won’t kill me. Came this far.”

“A few more years would be really nice,” Daniel said.

“Alright then. But Sofi, you have to do something about Amadeus who calls herself babysitting me.”

“
Amelie? What Gammie?” Sofia loved how her grandmother never failed to get her name wrong.
Amadeus, Amelia, Annabelle Amee…she’d even called her Arnold before.

“I’m not trying to be rude, but the woman stinks like she doesn’t get around to bathing much. I know I ain’t roses, but I’m bedridden, that woman has no excuse. She smells like rotted floral matter. I’m tired of eating cough drops just to drown out the smell.”

Daniel buried his face in Sofia’s side, hiding his snickers.

“I’ll see to it Gammie.”

“She’s a fine person apart from her smell. Well and those hands of hers aren’t exactly easy on the eyes. It’s damn alarming waking up to King Kong knuckles near your person while fuzzy headed.”

Daniel
pressed his face harder to hide his strained laughter and Sofia couldn’t help joining him.

“What’s so funny,”
her grandmother demanded, oblivious and bored looking.

“You Gammie. You’re funny.”

“Me?”

“King Kong knuckles? Were you once a standup comedian?”

“Now I see where Sofia gets her charming wit.” Laughter lit Daniel’s deep voice and created an emotionally erotic feeling.

“You two get out now, I need my beauty rest.”

Sofia got up and kissed her Gammie’s forehead and her heart clenched in her chest when Daniel stood and did the same.

“Nice to meet you Miss Rachel.”

“Same to you sweet heart. May as well call me Gammie since I feel like you’re already family.”

He kissed her forehead a second time. “Thank you Gammie. If you don’t mind, I’d like to take Sofia on a date.”

“By all means,” she said, ecstatic. “The child is a little green around the edges, so take care of her for me.”

“
Always.”

S
ofia was furious at how adorable he was behaving. Forcing her to feel all this mushy shit for him. Wait, date? Oh shit.

The
y walked out of her Gammie’s room and before she could pull him to hers, Amelie met them. With Jason. Holy hell.

“Sorry,” Jason said. “I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d meet your grandmother before we headed to
Applebee’s.”

She glanced at Daniel who stared at the floor before giving Jason a smile. “I was just leaving.” He turned to Sofia. “Do have fun. You deserve it.” He
gave her a lingering kiss on her forehead, and left.

Sofia
stood numb, wondering how in God’s name could that happen? In that frikn order? On that frikn day?

She came close to cancelling with Jason
but couldn’t bring herself to. She’d deal with Daniel after. He’d have to understand.

Chapter Thirteen

“You look absolutely beautiful, I’m not kidding.”

“You uh, you look pretty damn good yourself.” Sofia sipped her water and smiled pleasantly while cussing out the butterflies going wacko in her stomach.  She couldn’t stop thinking of Daniel. Daniel’s smile when she’d walked in to her grandmother’s room. The feel of his arms around her. The feel of his face pressing into her. The sound of his beautiful laughter. The pain overshadowing the pretense of happiness he’d forced in his blue eyes before he left. She took another sip of water, wishing the night would be over and she could crawl in bed and just cry. Cry for him. For her. For Jason who clearly liked her. And the irony of that. How many years had she wet dreamed of him? Too many to count. He’d become an idol in her mind, the kind you only drooled over, not dated.

“You okay?”

She jerked her gaze to Jason. “Sorry, was thinking of Gammie, she uh…she’s been acting kind of weird lately.” God she hated lying about her grandmother, it felt sacrilegious.

“Like what?” Jason reached across the table and took her hand, totally blowing her concentration.

“Just…” Sofia froze. Daniel was in the restaurant and headed to their table. Sofia jerked her hand out of Jason’s and watched him approach. Black t-shirt, blue jeans, and determined blue eyes locked and loaded right on her. Sofia couldn’t’ breathe or move or look away. She braced as he strode right up to their table, took her hand and pulled her to her feet. One hand slid around her waist and the other up into her hair. His intense blue eyes bore into hers. Then he kissed her. Lord in heaven, the man
really
kissed her. His soft full lips meshed into hers, his tongue demanding entrance. Sofia couldn’t stop her whimpered moan as he explored her mouth with a heart breaking passion.

Sofia gasped when he broke the kiss, stroked her lower lip with his thumb, then turned and walked away.

She stared after him, stunned, hurting. Then furious that he would waltz in, steal her heart and breath away and waltz back out.

“Excuse me Jason.”

****

“Stop!”

Daniel turned, hand gripping his car door and faced a furious Sofia. With her, he could never be sure exactly why she was pissed. It was all he had to keep a straight face and not show what that kiss had done to him. Her flashing blue eyes, her ivory skin in the moonlight, her breasts moving to the tune of her fury in her white silk top… all made him ache bone deep. But what was so different in that moment was the emotional orgasm threatening him with her every approaching step.