Breathless Promises (Alluring Promises Series Book 3) (25 page)

Speaking of “Mom,” she hasn’t called and didn’t pick up when I tried to call her. My dad won’t talk about it, but I have a feeling they’re divorcing—all because of me. This is where I go back and forth. I should have never told my dad. But then that was the problem for all those years when my uncle…

I don’t know what would have been better. Sarah insists I did the right thing. Maybe if I had told him years ago, my life would have turned out different. Or would it? Would he have believed me? That’s a lot of what ifs.

I’m going to miss having my dad around. I hate writing in this journal. Don’t take it the wrong way, but it feels stupid and silly to write this…who the fuck is going to see this anyway? I have no idea if I ever want you to see this. You shouldn’t see it…because I’ll probably write something fucked up. That’s what journals are for though; to write out those stupid thoughts in your head and…what’s the point in putting them on paper? So someone can use it some day against you? Would you do that? Show me how fucked up I really am?

Aubrey…

Why am I even signing this????

It was time for my dad to leave and I was heartbroken. I didn’t want him to go because it was really nice spending so much time with him.

I knew I wasn’t going to be alone. No one would let me be alone. Hell, the schedules were set and divided among the group as to who would pick me up each day. There were days I was ticked off about being treated like a child. But when I had my bad days, I knew it made more sense this way.

Clark dropped me off every morning. His way of dropping me off was a lot different than my dad, who let me walk in on my own. Clark led me into the building every morning as if I’d wait for him to leave and run to a bar. But maybe he was right to do it that way; there were definitely days when that was exactly what I wanted to do. There were some days when facing the truth and going through my demons tore me up inside.

Running to a bar and getting drunk would have been much easier.

But if I did that, I’d let Clark down. I’d let Vanessa down. I’d let my dad down.

For some reason, letting myself down wasn’t up there on my list. I know it should be and I’m sure Sarah would have something to say about that.

Clark always told me I was such a confident woman and that was one of the draws to me. But, I wondered what he would think now.
And why I cared so much…

Clark

Alone time at last. The girls took Aub out for their monthly spa day and with her dad gone, I finally had the place all to myself. After making myself something to eat, I flopped on the couch and flipped on the TV.

It wasn’t like I didn’t enjoy Aub’s dad being here. He was actually a really cool guy and was someone my dad would get along with too. But there were those weird times that Aub would come home from therapy and neither of us would know what to say or do. I mean, hell, we’re guys. At least in my world, we deal with shit by watching a game and having a drink. Since I cleared all the liquor out of the house, drinking was out. And when we turned on the game, we had that weird silence as if we were supposed to talk to her about something, but had no idea what to say.

My mouth watered as I lifted the sandwich up to my lips. The dressing started to drip and I managed to wrap my mouth around the bread just in time to catch it. The tomato, ham, cheese and that dressing mixed together perfectly. I groaned to no one in particular when a knock at the door jolted me from enjoying more of my sandwich. Annoyed, I set my plate back down and went to answer it.

My pulse spiked the moment I opened the door and stared into those gorgeous blue eyes and taunting smile. As happy as I was to see Tina, there was something restraining the usual excitement I had for her. And no, it wasn’t because I wanted to get back to my sandwich. I stared for a moment and tried to remember all the good times we’ve had.

Ignoring whatever expression I had on my face, she jumped into my arms, hugging my neck tight. “Did you miss me?” Tina asked as she kicked the door closed with her foot. I pulled back irritated as I recalled the fight we had right before she left last time.

I peeled her off me and took a step back. Glaring at her, I wasn’t sure what to say exactly. A mix of emotions ran through me from the anger I felt versus the elation of seeing her standing here again. I ran through all the reasons why I should be thrilled to see her.
I mean it is Tina.
She’s a smoking hot model. She’s fantastic in bed. My eyes ran over her body.
Shit.
She’s got an amazing body. My dick got hard as I remembered what she felt like under me. Yeah, I couldn’t remember any bad times at that moment.

She propped her hand on her hip and smiled that gorgeous smile of hers. “I missed
you
,” she cooed as she closed the distance between us. Her hands gripped the sides of my shirt, pulling me closer to her.

I was torn between telling her I really didn’t miss her that much and feeling a bit of guilt that I hadn’t really thought of her in the past couple of weeks. Seeing her silly grin drew me back to her and I couldn’t fight allowing my cock to take over this situation. I broke into a small smile as I quickly wrapped my arms around her and squeezed her hard. I inhaled the sweet scent of her shampoo that brought me back to all the good times we’ve had.

Tina giggled and then I felt her soft lips as she brushed a kiss against my neck. I turned and kissed her back. Her sensuous lips pressed against mine as our tongues entangled with familiarity. My cock was at full attention and ready to rip into her. Maybe it’s just that I haven’t had sex in awhile since all this crap with Aub started up.

“Am I on your shit list? Or are you gonna let me back into your life?” She asked with a sly smile. I hate that I really can’t stay mad at her for very long. But, nothing ever changes between us. Why fight it? And why not use it to my full advantage?

“I don’t know. You really screwed me over last time you left. It seems to be a thing. I’m thinking you’ve got some makin’ up to do.”

My eyes lingered on her lips as her teeth tugged at her full bottom lip as she leaned in. “Let me show you how sorry I really am.” I watched as she dropped to her knees and began to undo my jeans.

I exhaled and was pretty sure I’d make her apologize to me over and over again. Maybe I’d just never accept her apology and make her keep begging for my forgiveness.

******

After letting Tina apologize to me, we ordered some take-out. My phone rang with a text from Matt that everyone was already at a restaurant and I should run down there. I shot a reply back letting him know Tina was back in town and that we’d skip meeting them out.

After another round of apologies, Tina fell asleep. I couldn’t though. I kept thinking about Aub. Actually, what was even worse was even when I was with Tina, I kept picturing Aub doing all those things to me. Every second Tina had her mouth wrapped around my cock I pretended it was Aub’s sweet mouth pulling me into pure bliss. I didn’t feel any remorse about thinking about someone else while I was with Tina. But, for some reason, I felt guilty I wasn’t with Aub. How fucked up was that?

I threw my jeans on and walked out to the living room. Feeling restless, I paced the carpeted floor. I shot a text to Vanessa to make sure she’s with Aub. I wasn’t sure what they were out doing, but I didn’t want Aub falling back into her old ways if they were at Allure or another bar. If I wasn’t around to watch over her, how could I help her if she got into some trouble?

I checked the time and realized it was only eleven. They’d probably be out much later. And what was Aub doing? Was she drinking? How much was she drinking? Was she getting picked up by some guy? And why did that thought make my heart rate spike? I clenched my fists as my pace quickened. What the fuck was I doing?

Me:
Is Aub drinking? Do you need me to come down there?

Vanessa:
She’s fine. Drinking water, actually. No need to come down. Shouldn’t you be paying attention to Blondie?

I ignored the blondie comment, knowing the girls get tired of Tina coming and going out of my life. I can’t say I don’t blame them. I swallowed and wondered how Aub felt about her. I knew before all her crap started up that she thought Tina was playing me. Does Aub care about that now? I should have shot a text to Matt instead. I wasn’t even sure why I sent one to Vanessa, but now that I had I was sure Aub would know I was checking up on her.

I stared at the blank text box and wanted to write something else, but wasn’t sure what. Maybe I should just text Aub. And why does just thinking about texting her make me excited. Hell, my cock felt like it was waking up again just thinking about her…and her lips. Hips rhymes with that, so then I couldn’t help but think of those. And grabbing them. Which led me back to that night after the wedding. The way she rocked those hips on top of me, and how she moaned when she came from riding my cock.

Fuck
. Now I’m fully hard just thinking about Aub. Maybe I should go down to the bar and see what she’s up to. I adjusted my cock so it wouldn’t be so uncomfortable in my jeans. I went back into my bedroom and pulled a t-shirt from my drawer and slipped it on.

I glanced over to Tina. She was still asleep in bed and I was glad she hadn’t woken. I should leave her a note, but hell, I was just running down to the bar. I’d be back before she’d even realize I was gone. I was actually thankful she was leaving soon for a photo shoot in Europe. I knew that would give me some time to get my thoughts in order about Aub.

I started for my closet when I heard a soft moan from Tina. Glancing back, I watched her reach over and stretch her arm out to the empty space. My mind was screaming for her to go back to sleep while I stood there completely motionless.
Don’t wake up. Don’t wake up…

Normally, the site of Tina naked with just a sheet covering the lower half of her body would have sent me over the edge. Especially the way my cock felt right now. I should stay and just fuck her again. Why would I waste my time going down to the bar? Aub is safe with Matt and Vanessa.

Unless she’s flirting with some guy, then she could fuck things up for herself.

That helped me decide what I was going to do. The thought of Aub batting her long lashes at some other guy made me want to punch the door instead of pound the hell out of Tina.

I grabbed my jacket from my closet with such force that the hanger clanked against the rod. I held my breath and glanced at my bed.

Tina sprang up, looking around the room while blinking her eyes.
Shit.
I’m not going anywhere. Unless I can convince her to go out too.

“What are you doing, baby?” She brushed a hand through her long blonde hair. “You’re all dressed,” she noted when her eyes seemed to fully open and take in my appearance.

“I was just going to run down to Allure to meet up with the gang for a drink. Do you want to come?” My heart beat furiously inside my chest. Was I nervous because I didn’t want her to come? Or that she’d think I was up to something?

“Mmm, it’s my first night back. Come back to bed, baby,” she whispered as she leaned over, allowing the sheet to fall. My eyes flew to where the sheet had been. I swallowed and tried my best to keep my focus back to what I really wanted to do. At least, I think it’s what I wanted to do.

“Well, I just thought a drink would be good. You could see the gang again and we’d be back here in no time.”

I knew I’d have a fight the moment I watched Tina roll her eyes and huff. “You see them all the time. You haven’t seen me in a very long time.” She threw me a seductive smile and flipped the sheet back.

Like a seductive goddess from the pages of a sinful novel, she rose and strode to me. Every move she made caused my eyes to flick over her body. When her soft hands ran over my face and then down my body, I knew she won.

Fingers undid my jeans in record time as her lips flicked over my throat eager to seduce me. I sighed trying to focus on where I was supposed to go, but couldn’t remember at all. My shirt was shoved up my chest by her fast flying maneuvers and by the time her hands were down my pants, I couldn’t think straight at all.

“Mmm,” she moaned. “I just can’t get enough of you. I’ve missed you too much.” Her hands and mouth tried to prove the worth of her words.

The sound of the front door slamming shut magnified the pain shooting through my cock. “Ah!” I lurched forward feeling the pain from her teeth scraping against my sensitive skin.

“Honey, I’m home!” I heard Aub shout loudly through the apartment followed by Vanessa’s laughter.

“Ohh! Ohh! Ohh!” Aub moaned sex noises obnoxiously as they continued to joke around.

“That bitch!” Tina seethed as she fell back to the bed. I was still hunched over trying to rub the pain away from my cock.

The sound of the TV filled the previous quiet of the apartment as the girls continued to laugh and chat about something down at the bar.

I shoved my dick back into my boxer briefs and pulled my jeans back up, zipping them fast as I stared at the door angrily.

“It was so much nicer when she worked out of town. When I get back from Europe, I sure hope she’s on another job assignment.”

I looked down at Tina with my brows furrowed.
Holy shit.
I never even asked Aub what happened to her job.

More cackling outside my door reminded me that they were back. Aside from the pain that was now subsiding, I was a little more than anxious to talk to Aub and find out if she met anyone down at the bar. She was home and safe now. So, I didn’t need to worry, right?

“Hey!” Tina smacked my thigh and I looked back down at her.

“What?”

“I was talking to you! I just asked…”

“Shh!” I swear I could hear a guy’s voice out there. I held my hand up to silence Tina as I strained to hear that other voice.

“What is with you?” Tina huffed. I knew I had to tell her something, but there was no way I was going to tell her what happened with Aub.

“I thought I heard a guy’s voice out there.” I tried to explain.

“Yeah. Probably Matt’s and Aub probably brought someone home too. Who knows with her? She’ll sleep with anything that walks.”

The comment hit me hard and I had a sudden urge to smack her. I couldn’t actually do it. I don’t hit girls.
Ever.
But her words elicited a need to punch something. Hard. I might not have been so angry, if there hadn’t been some truth to them.

“It’s true,” she huffed.

“Look, I’m just going to go out there and talk to them, to see what happened tonight and if I missed anything.”

“Missed anything? What the hell would you miss? One of your girls hooking up with someone else?”

I never wanted a girlfriend for this reason. Not that we’re really together, but this was the bullshit I tried to avoid.

“No. I just wanted to see what happened down at the club tonight.”

“It just seems that you’re not too excited I’m here. I leave tomorrow and I’ve missed you,” she whined.

She had a point. I strained again and didn’t hear any other male voices. It could have been from the TV, I suppose. My quick decision to keep Tina calm took over.

“You’re right. You leave tomorrow and I should just enjoy our time.”

“Good. Now come back to bed, silly.”

It’s hard to argue with a naked woman; especially one with her legs spread and nipples hard enough to cut ice. And just like that, my dick took over.