Blush (Rockstar #2) (6 page)

“I THINK I'M going to puke,“ I tell no one in particular. My stomach churning with nausea, my mouth gathering with excess saliva—you know, how it does just before you're going to vomit. I take deep calming breaths trying to stave off the urge to blow chunks all over the floor where Spenser just finished styling my hair. It doesn't really matter that it's styled, I know I'm going to be caked in sweat and look like a drowned rat before long.

“Luciana Russo if you throw up in this room, I'm going to end up throwing up right along with you and I can't promise mine won't be directed toward you,“ Spenser chides.

“Damn, Spense. Have some sympathy.“

“Lucy. You're going to be performing live in front of thousands of people, living your dream. You want sympathy for that? No way, doll. If you want sympathy you should look between shit and syphilis in the dictionary.“

Simone blinks while Carmen holds an outfit close to her chest, wide-eyed.

“Harsh much? Shit. I'm nervous. I'm going to love every second of it, but I'm a nervous wreck. Be nice to me damn it!“ I curse. “Where's Sera and Meggie?“

“They're long done and are likely doing a couple shots to calm their nerves.“

“Well why the hell am I last?“

Spenser directs Carmen forward with what I'm guessing is my outfit for the night.

“Because,“ he tells me, “you always take the longest and you're a light weight. I knew if I let you near the alcohol too early you'd be a hot mess.“

I shrug. “Valid point.“

“Here's your outfit, Lucy,“ Carmen says as she lays it out on the sofa for me.

“And shoes,“ Simone adds, setting them down.

“Okay,“ I reply, standing up and pressing a hand to my stomach. “Thanks you guys.“

Spenser nods. “See you out there.“

I nod back.

As Spenser and the girls exit, Jesse enters.

“Babe, you're looking a little green,“ he tells me, tilting my head up to look at him.

“My nerves are crazy, Jesse.“

“You're going to be great.“

I take a deep breath, breathing in his scent. Sandalwood, ocean, and yum. That's when I notice what he's wearing. Holy effing hell. My husband is
hot
. He's got on jeans and a tight sleeveless Blush t-shirt. I swear you can see the definition of his abs through the shirt which, I'm sure, is strategically done so the women in the crowd swoon. He's wearing black boots and has a pair of black sunglasses hanging on the neckline of his shirt.

“Damn, you are hot,“ I tell him, licking my lips.

“Yeah?“ he asks with a grin.

“Oh yeah.“

“How hot? Hot enough that you're wet?“ he asks.

I look at him through my eyelashes. “Maybe.“

“Hmm.“

“Maybe you should check,“ I tell him as I untie the sash of my robe and let it drop to the floor. I stand before him naked as the day I was born.

“Fuck, Lucy.“

“Yes, that's the plan.“

He chuckles. “It
would
get rid of your nerves.“

“Like we need an excuse,“ I tell him. “Lock the door.“

His grin turns wicked. “I already did when I came in.“

I wiggle my eyebrows and he leans in and plunders my mouth. There is nothing slow or gentle about this kiss just as I know there is going to be nothing slow or gentle about the sex we're about to have. It's going to be hard, hot, and furious and I am one lucky woman. My man is hot as hell.

I reach for the button on his jeans and then unzip. I reach beneath the waistband of his boxer briefs and wrap my hand around his already hard, pulsing shaft.

He grunts and lifts me up, my arms going around his neck and my legs around his waist. He sits on the sofa and I straddle his lap. He frees his cock from the confines of his clothing and pushes his jeans and boxer briefs down his legs, lifting me up as he does. Then he's lifting me, but he pauses, runs his fingers over the folds of my pussy, and growls when he finds me more than ready for him.

Then he's positioning the head of his cock to my opening and pushing up as I push down, slowly. It's never an easy task taking him inside of me, but it feels so fucking good when he gets there. Like now. I feel so full and he's so deep.

His mouth covers mine and I moan aloud as I lift and lower myself onto him.

“You feel so fucking good, Luce.“

“Mmm,“ I moan and tilt my head back as I ride him.

He reaches around and pulls my ass cheeks apart and my eyes fly open.

“Trust me?“

I don't hesitate. “Always.“

He smiles softly and cups my face, then slides a finger between us, gathering some of the moisture there. When he reaches back around behind me, I stiffen. I can't help it.

“I won't hurt you, baby. Never.“

“I know. It's just…“

“I promise you, this will feel good.“

I nod, biting my lip.

His finger touches that forbidden place that had only caused me pain when touched before. But this is Jesse. My husband. The man who loves me as much as I love him. The man I trust with my life. The man who would rather die than cause me pain. So, I relax as his finger probes the puckered flesh and slowly begins to slip inside.

I'm not going to lie. It feels all kinds of fucked up to have his finger there and when he pushes it inside, little by little, it doesn't feel the greatest. I realize then that I've stopped moving and he's watching my reaction closely.

“Move for me, baby,“ he coaxes.

I don't hesitate—I just do. At first it's a little painful but the more I move myself over his cock and his finger, the more the pain turns into pleasure. Then his finger slips in all the way as his cock nudges my cervix and I moan. Holy shit that feels amazing.

“Okay?“ he asks.

“Mhmm.“

“Feel good?“ he asks, beginning to thrust upward with both his hips and hand.

“Ahhh, Yesss.“

“Jesus, Lucy. You're so fucking sexy and hot and wet and tight. So perfect.“

“Unh,“ I reply, moving faster, my clit rubbing against his pubic bone.

“One day I'm going to take you here,“ he tells me, his finger matching his cock, thrust for thrust.

“Uh…“ His cock is huge. I'm not so sure about—

“I want all of you, Lucy. I want to take away the bad and replace it with us. Everything good.“

My heart skips a beat. Only my Jesse can do that to me. I nod and cry out as I grind down hard against him, my clit beginning to pulse.

“So close baby. You're going to explode all over my cock soon.“

“I didn't know…“ I trail off.

He just nods and then kisses me. The sensation is too much and when I lean forward, my clit rubs against him hard, his cock and finger slamming into me and I'm done for.

“Jesse,“ I whisper.

“Come, baby. Let me feel you. Let go.“

So I do. I come, and I come hard. I bite down on his shoulder so I don't scream down the building.

Jesse lets out a grunt and a growl as he thrusts his hips upward, drawing out my orgasm and bringing forth his own. When I feel the first of his cum jet into me, the next wave of my orgasm is more intense than the last. Hot and hard he pulses himself inside me and I lick and bite his shoulder and neck. When the last wave subsides, I rest my forehead against his shoulder.

I try not to cry and so far I haven't. He, my amazing husband, has just taken a horrible memory and turned it into something amazing and loving. I blow out a breath and look up at him, tears blurring my vision.

“Baby,“ he breathes, his forehead resting against mine. “I love you so much.“ His arms wrap around me tight and I reach my hands up to cup his cheeks.

“Thank you,“ I whisper. “I love you, Jesse. So much it hurts sometimes.“

He nods, his forehead brushing against mine. His lips press against mine softly.

There's a knock at the door. “Ten minutes,“ Damian yells through the door.

I meet Jesse's gaze and one side of his mouth kicks up in a smirk.

“Nerves gone?“

“Uh-huh,“ I reply, standing up. He walks over to the bathroom to clean up and brings me back some wet paper towels. I hold out my hand but he just reaches between my legs and cleans me up. I love that he takes care of me this way.

We both head to the bathroom, him to throw away the towels, me to pee before I get dressed.

When I get back into the room, I see Jesse frowning looking at my clothes.

“What's wrong?“

He shakes his head.

I reach for my cotton panties and bra—bless you, Spenser. Cotton will absorb the sweat and still be comfortable whereas lace would itch like a mofo.

I pull the black, pink, and white top over my head and I realize now why Jesse's frowning. The top is cut off just below my breasts and sleeveless. It also dips low in the front and the back.

I pull on tights and then the bottoms, which are little more than high-waisted panties, ending just below my belly button.

Jesse's now scowling and I roll my eyes as I reach for my high-heeled shoes.

“Get over it. If you can go out there looking all sexified then so can I.“

“I'm not showing as much skin as you are, wife.“

I laugh softly. “You will be soon enough, husband, when you take your shirt off as you always do.“

He grunts.

“I wore more revealing clothes for the cover of the album than this, if you'll remember.“

“Yeah, maybe, but you weren't out in front of thousands of dudes panting after your sexy ass,“ he tells me, folding his impressively muscled arms over his chest.

I snort. “No, they just use those photos to jack off to.“

“Fuck.“

“Right? Seriously sucks but it is what it is,“ I tell him, putting the second large black hoop earring in my ear.

Another knock at the door.

“Luciana, unlock this door so I can put your lipstick on now that you're done fucking that seriously hot piece of ass you call a husband,“ Spenser shouts.

I laugh and Jesse shakes his head.

“That guy,“ Jesse says and I giggle. I actually giggle. Again. Jesse points and I stick out my tongue at him. His eyes darken and he licks his lips. My nipples harden.

“Oh my God. Stop,“ I laugh, pointing at him. He smirks and winks.

I unlock the door and Spenser rushes in. “You have, like, three minutes. Good to see your hubby took care of those nerves. Now, hold still.“ He applies my lipstick, grabs a tissue. “Blot,“ he says and I blot my lips against the tissue. He swipes a coat of clear gloss over the top and smacks my ass. “You better hustle, Damian is looking like he—“

Spenser cuts himself off as a harried-looking Damian walks in the door.

“Sorry Kingston, it's got to be done,“ Damian tells Jesse. He walks up behind me, grabs my shoulders and proceeds to push me down the hall toward the stage. “Suck it up, Lucy. There'll be nerves for like the first five minutes. Once you get halfway through the first song, all nerves will be forgotten. Remember how it was in Vegas?“

“How do you know what it was like in Vegas?“ I turn to ask.

He turns me back around. “Just remember what it was like in Vegas, how quickly the nerves went away—how everyone loved Blush.“

We get to the stage where Trace, Meggie, Jace, and Sera are already standing, each fidgeting in their own way.

“Shit,“ I say.

“Here,“ Sera says, handing me a shot.

“What is it?“

“Does it really matter?“ she asks.

“No. No it doesn't,“ I say and slam the shot. I know my face contorts into something screwed up but I just don't care. Jesse hands me his water and I take a drink. He also hands me a peppermint Life Saver.

“I've got nowhere to put that, babe.“

Jesse kisses my cheek then tucks it between my breasts where there's a bit of gaping fabric.

“Nice,“ I tell him. I crook my finger and he comes toward me.

“Don't you dare kiss him, Luciana Russo!“ Spenser scolds.

“Tsk, tsk. I know better,“ I tell him. Jesse leans down with a grin. “Since I can't kiss you…“ I lean in and lick his lips then pull back and he runs his tongue over where I just licked.

“That was fucking hot,“ Xander leers. “I think I'm hard again.“

I laugh.

“Go, go,“ Damian tells us and Trace heads out first.

“Shit, shit, shit,“ I say, bouncing on my toes and shaking out my hands and arms. I tilt my head to each side, back, then forward. Sera does her normal routine and Jace just cracks his knuckles.

Jace heads out next, then Meggie, then Sera.

I stand waiting for them to get set up and Trace starts beating on his drums. The crowd goes crazy and what can only be described as a roar rushes over me.

“Wow,“ I breathe. Jace starts playing. A few seconds later Meggie joins. Then Sera.

“You got this, Luce,“ Jesse tells me.