Blood of the Rainbow (39 page)

Sara cleared her throat and coughed so they would think she’d just walked out of the kitchen.

“Come on, Sara, I’ll take you to the barn.” Myra walked out the door without waiting on Sara.

 Sara hugged Nadine. “Thank you.”

Nadine smiled and watched them leave. A tear slid down her cheek.

Myra followed Nadine’s instructions to the letter. She barely said half a dozen words to Sara on the short trip. She pulled up to the barn, helped her saddle Jade and got back in her car. “Be careful, Sara and good luck. I hope he listens to you,” she said, then sped down the road in a cloud of rusty dust.

Sara mounted Jade, and sat there for a while, thinking about Nadine and Myra’s conversation.

‘Whatever future they have is based on the decisions they make. We can’t steer them in the right direction for our own personal gain, and you know that.’

What did Nadine and Myra know about Jared and Sara’s future? Did they have a future?

‘One wrong word – one wrong move, that’s all it takes.’

Was Jared’s future with Eve despite what he said and believed? Was that what needed to play out that Jared was so afraid of? Then Sara thought about what Jared had said to her last night in their moment of passion.

‘Sara, we have to stop now! I won’t do this. I won’t risk having a baby with you.’

“That has to be it,” Sara mused. “Even the book was trying to tell me. Oh I’ve been so foolish.”

Regardless of what their future might hold Sara was determined to get answers – starting today! She took out the map and compass, and started plotting her path into the desert. She wasn’t sure she could do this, but she knew she
had
to try. Things couldn’t go on like this, and despite what she’d decided, she wasn’t ready to call it quits. She still wanted to spend her life with Jared. That part had never changed. It would never change! Book or no book. Destiny or chance, Sara was going to be sure this was what Jared wanted.

 Sara leaned over and patted Jade’s neck and gave her a gentle nudge in the flank. Jade trotted ahead with Angelstar galloping alongside them. Using landmarks as points of reference, and checking her position on the map from time to time, Sara headed in the general direction Jared had taken her.

------------

After a while, Sara decided she was hopeless at this. She would never have been a good tracker.
Who was I kidding?
Sara would never find him. She’d been going around in circles. Everything looked the same to her. Sara wasn’t lost, but she couldn’t find that damn line of cactus she remembered seeing, before they got to the bottom of the mountain.

“I’m going to get lost and dry up like the ground beneath my feet,” Sara mused. “Maybe Jared can find some peace when I’m gone. Maybe then he can find his ‘real’ dreamgirl.”

Sara leaned down on Jade’s neck, closed her eyes and cried. Nadine’s words echoed through her mind. ‘
Listen to your heart and it will lead you straight to him
.’

“Ok Nada, what have I got to lose?” She dried her eyes, cleared her mind, and pointed Jade in the way she felt compelled to go. She opened her eyes and aimed Jade west, further into the desert. “Now I know I’m crazy. That has to be it! The desert sun has fried my brain. I’ve lost all sense of reason.” Sara nudged Jade and treaded onward.

Half an hour later, Sara was just about ready to give up. Desperate tears streamed down Sara’s cheeks. She leaned over on Jade’s neck again. “You’re wrong about me Jared. Everyone else might have a Spirit Guide, but I don’t. Even Garfield would be nice now. All that’s going to be remembered about Sara Foster is that she dried up in the Arizona Desert.”

Sara wasn’t even sure if she could find her way back, but she didn’t really care. She was getting ready to aim Jade toward home when she saw them. Dead ahead of her, standing like green giants were the row of cactus she’d been looking for. She even remembered what Jared had called them.

Sara gave Jade a gentle nudge, and she started a slow gallop. Little Angelstar was in full gallop trying to keep up.

Sara found the mountain and at the foot of it was Satan, Jared’s horse, tied to the same bush he’d used the last time. Nadine was right. Her heart
had
led her to him.

Sara tied Jade and gave all three of the horses a drink in her hand from her canteen. She then swung what was left over her shoulder, stuffed the map and compass in Jade’s saddlebag, and headed up the mountain, following the same path as near as she could remember. Her progress wasn’t quite as fast this time. Without Jared there to help her, Sara wasn’t that confident. She felt empty without him. She didn’t like that feeling, it frightened her. Sara pushed everything aside and concentrated on her path and footing. As it was, that was hard enough, in itself. This was the first time she’d braved the heights alone.

------------

Three times Sara had rested and took a drink from her canteen, before she reached the familiar ledge, her Achilles heel. The overhang of stone where she would have to jump up. Sara stretched as far as she could reach. Even, on her tiptoes, she could just barely feel the top with the tips of her fingers. “Well that isn’t going to work. Now what?” Sara tried jumping and almost fell off the ledge. Her foot slipped on the loose rock fragments. Her heart jumped in her throat, and she started hyperventilating. Out of sheer desperation, Sara started to cry. She wiped the tears with the back of her hand, creating streaks of mud down her cheeks.

Sara slumped to her knees, folding her feet under her. She’d failed. The only thing left for her to do was to call out and hope Jared heard her –
if
he were even up there. Jared might have gone further up the mountain or went up a different path. If he’d done that, he could easily come back down and never see her. When he got to the bottom, he would see Jade and Angelstar beside Satan, and be infuriated with her for bringing the horses out in the noonday sun, with as little water as she had. Who was she kidding? Jared was already furious with her. Maybe he’d have mercy on her, and toss her off the mountain. It would save both of them a lot of trouble.

Using the last shred of common sense she had left, Sara turned to retrace her steps back down the mountain. In her haste to get to Jared, she hadn’t been paying attention to her surroundings. If she had been, she would have known that she wasn’t on the ledge alone. On the other end, barring her way back down the mountain, she had company – the worst kind – a pissed off rattlesnake. Sara could almost hear fate laughing at her. She couldn’t go up, and now, she couldn’t go back. Unless the rattlesnake magically appeared out of thin air, he must have been asleep when Sara stepped over him. Having been disturbed by a crazy human, the rattlesnake wasn’t at all happy, sharing his personal space with Sara.

Sara had gotten herself into a fine fix this time for sure. Keeping one eye on the rattlesnake, she carefully unlocked her cell in hopes she could call someone – no signal. Cautiously, she walked the few paces the scope of the ledge would allow her to – still no signal. She locked it and shoved it deep in her pocket, so it wouldn’t fall out. She looked at the wall of stone in front of her; warily searching for a possible hole or crevice. Anything, she could put her hand or foot in to boost her up, since it was obvious she couldn’t go back. There wasn’t any. She sighed deeply, and silent tears came. This time, she didn’t even bother to wipe them off. It didn’t matter now anyway.

Sara focused her ears, listening for any sign that Jared was up there. On the rare occasion, when the wind blew over the ledge, she thought she could hear a faint sound, like someone chanting. She sighed. Relieved that he or at least someone was up there. Now all she had to do was get up enough courage to call for help. That wouldn’t be easy either, Sara was embarrassed. She should have known better than to try something like this on her own. What was she thinking? That was just it. She wasn’t, any more than she had been when she ran from Jared. Nadine was right. Sara had listened to her heart, and it had led her to him, or at least Sara made herself believe it had. The person chanting might be a stranger and may not appreciate Sara invading his personal meditation. Whatever, Sara was getting what she deserved.

Out of pure reflex, Sara started screaming. She forgot all about her problem with Jared. “Jared! If you’re up there, please help me!”

Sara heard a voice above her. “Sara! What in the name of all that’s good, are you doing down there on that ledge?” Jared’s voice was harsh.

Sara was right – he was angry. She started crying again. “Trying to find you,” she replied, feeling like a little kid being rebuked by her Mother. It wasn’t her mother that was rebuking her. It was the man she was in love with. She was about to be bitten by a rattlesnake. She would probably die, and Jared was yelling at her.
What a fitting end for such a failure
.

“I thought you said all you needed to say last night. You said it was over. You said you didn’t love me anymore. You threw me out of my -
your
bedroom. Sara, why have you followed me out here? Whose idea was this? Myra’s? Who told you where I’d be, Mother?”

“No! She didn’t know where you were. She told me to follow my heart, and it would lead me to you. Now I’m not sure coming out here was a good idea. In fact, if this snake doesn’t kill me first, maybe I should just step off the ledge. I’m sure that would work,” Sara said, moving closer to the edge.

“Stop!” Jared’s voice was an animalistic infuriated guttural growl. “Don’t you dare Sara!”

“What difference does it make? I’m not supposed to be in your future anyway Jared.”

Jared’s eyes started changing to a deep glowing crimson. Even in the bright sun, it was easy to see. His voice changed from anger to fear. “Don’t move, Sara! Don’t even breathe. I’ll be
right
back. Don’t move, just
hold
still and don’t provoke it.”

Sara responded in an exceptionally soft voice. “I wouldn’t dream of pissing it off any more than it already is.” Even at that low volume, Sara’s voice set off another volley of rattles from her reptilian roommate. Sara closed her eyes and held her breath. There was a loud bang, and Sara was covered with a shower of rock fragments and dust. She screamed again. The snake went spiraling down the mountain.

When she first looked up, she thought she was in her dream. Jared was wearing nothing but a leather loincloth tied around his waist, that didn’t hide a lot. His chest was bare, and his face and torso were covered with paint. Sara felt faint. She closed her eyes and took a couple of deep breaths.

“Give me your hands, Sara, so I can pull you up!” Without hesitation, Sara reached out. Jared lifted her up so fast her head spun. The next thing she knew, Jared was pulling her into his arms, leading her a few paces from the edge of the rock. He took her backpack off and flung it towards his camp. The instant Sara was out of danger, her adrenaline rush left and her legs folded. Jared lifted her into his arms and carried her over to his camp. There was a blanket on the ground, next to the fire where he’d apparently been sitting.

Jared wet a cloth with water from his canteen, wiped Sara’s face, and then laid it on her forehead. Sara’s head was still spinning when she opened her eyes and sat up. She gasped in fright. “Easy, it’s me, Sara. Are you all right? It didn’t bite you did it?” he asked, anxiously examining her arms and legs.

Sara’s voice was unsteady. “No….”

Jared smiled relieved. “What were you thinking Sara? You could have been killed!” His voice was raised again.

Sara started to cry again. “Maybe I would have been better off. Please don’t stop loving me. I’m sorry. I was wrong. I didn’t mean what I said.”

Jared raised an eyebrow at her and tilted his head. “None of it?”

“No.”

“Then tell me why, for the last few days you’ve been pulling away from me.”

“I thought it was what you wanted. Please don’t be mad at me. I was drunk. It wasn’t me talking.”

Jared half laughed, and gathered her in his arms. “I’m not mad at you. I’m relieved you’re not hurt. And I’m surprised that you could think I would
ever
stop loving you?”

“Well, the way you left my room….”

Jared scoffed. “I wasn’t mad at you Sara. I was mad at myself, and hurt because you didn’t think you were good enough for me. And everything you said… about not wanting to push me… and backing away from me. I had to get some answers.”

Sara tucked her head against his chest. “Jared, I’m
not
good enough for you!”

Jared lifted her chin and stared into her eyes. “Listen you stubborn little idiot,” he said playfully, smiling at her. “
You
are
good
enough
for
me
!” he said slowly, enunciating each word.

“No I’m not,” Sara said trying to hide her face again. Jared wouldn’t let her.

“You are! And, I’ll prove it to you,” he said, covering her mouth with his. His kiss was so demanding it practically sucked the breath from Sara’s lungs. His hands were all over her - touching her, caressing her. He kissed Sara repeatedly, each one deeper, longer, and filled with more passion than his last.

Jared dropped to his knees, pulling her with him and embraced her. He pulled Sara tight against him and kissed her again. He started taking her clothes off with practiced ease – as if they’d been this far before.

Sara was dazed with need, burning with desire. It didn’t matter what he did to her now. She was putty in his hands. She forgot about everything but her and Jared. The whole world disappeared.

Jared finished undressing her. Easing her back on the blanket, Jared laid beside her, pulling her against his all but naked body. Sara groaned and moaned with anticipated release. Jared showered her with kisses and caresses all over her body until her heart was pounding so fast, and her breath was so shallow, she thought she was dying.
If this is death, lead the way.

He untied his loincloth in one firm tug. “Maybe now you’ll believe me when I say you’re good enough. He studied Sara’s eyes, and then he kissed her long, hard and deep as he rolled on top of her.