Backtracker (45 page)

"
I did get you to stop him from killing himself like I
'
d seen in one of my flashes...but I did too much. When I told you to keep an eye on him because he seemed depressed, it wasn
'
t enough. You didn
'
t take it seriously, so I had to do more...too much...to make you save him. I had to lead you out to where he was and throw you at him, then get outta
'
the way so I didn
'
t ruin things.

"
It worked...but then you guessed that I could see the future. By leading you to Boris, I pretty much gave away my secret. From then on, you were no good to me, because you knew I was psychic.

"
Really, it was all my own fault. I gave you too many clues. When I first met you and the gang, I was a little too careless. I really liked you guys, so when I had a flash that you were going to be turned in for taking chocolate milk, I gave you a little warning about it. Normally, I wouldn
'
t try to clue someone in to something like that, because for one thing, it
'
s pretty trivial, and for another, I know direct warnings from me can
'
t change things...but I was feeling good and I figured I
'
d do it for the hell of it.

"
My warning didn
'
t do you any good...like usual...but I guess you put two and two together, or started to. Then, at the party, I screwed up again. I had a flash that a cop was gonna
'
show up, and I went and hinted around about it. I
'
d already told you to watch Boris, so I thought he was taken care of and it wouldn
'
t matter if I took another chance.

"
I got sloppy,
"
shrugged Larry.
"
The chocolate milk...the cop...I never should
'
ve mentioned them. They got you thinking, and then I had to take you straight to Boris, and I guess that finally did it. You caught on to what I can do, and I couldn
'
t use you anymore.

"
That turned out to be a major problem,
"
said Larry, and then he sighed.
"
See, there were more flashes. I still needed help.

"
I had two flashes...one clear, one blurry. In the clear one, I saw Ernie Dumbrowski
'
s parents die in a car wreck. I knew exactly when and where it would happen...but I knew that
I
couldn
'
t save them myself, and
you
couldn
'
t help anymore.

"
I knew I had to work on somebody else, so I dropped hints to different people at the party the night before the wreck. I did everything except come right out and say that I knew Ernie
'
s parents were gonna
'
die, and I prayed that someone would get the right idea.

"
I even tried to get Ernie thinking about it. That was why I asked him all those questions about his parents
'
trip. I didn
'
t think it would work, because for some reason, family of the people I see in my flashes usually can
'
t change things...but I tried anyway.

"
Well...you know what happened next,
"
Larry said slowly, and he cleared his throat.
"
Nobody got the hint.
"
Pausing for a moment, Larry sighed and stared at the floor, looked melancholy and regretful.

"
My other flash, the blurry one, had to do with Tom Martin,
"
he finally continued.

"
It really wasn
'
t a clear flash at all. I could see that Tom was going to commit suicide, and that
he had
do it at his house...but I couldn
'
t see
when
he would do it. For all I knew, it might happen in a few days, or it might not happen for weeks or months.

"
I didn
'
t know
what
to do,
"
frowned Larry, resuming his restless pacing.
"
I knew
I
couldn
'
t do anything directly, and
you
couldn
'
t help anymore...and I just didn
'
t know where to turn.

"
The problem with Tom was that he didn
'
t have any friends, people I could get to worry about him and watch over him. The people who worked under him at the steakhouse hated his guts. The other manager, Mr. Wyland, barely put up with him...and Tom just didn
'
t have a social life outside of work.

"
That left his wife. Now, like I said before, I usually don
'
t have much luck using family of the people I
'
m trying to help, and that includes wives...maybe they
'
re just too close, I don
'
t know...but she was my only chance. I knew nobody else cared enough about Tom to get worried if I hinted that he was in trouble.

"
Anyway, I hoped for the best, and I went over to Tom
'
s house. I borrowed a car from the bartender downstairs...my landlord...since he
'
s got two, and he told me once I could use one if I needed.

"
I figured I could drop in to see Tom, and then I could talk to his wife on the sly, tell her she oughtta
'
keep an eye on him.

"
Unfortunately,
"
sighed Larry,
"
his wife wasn
'
t there. She was out of town, at her mother
'
s, and she wouldn
'
t be back for two days.
"
Larry shook his head defeatedly.

"
Since Tom
'
s wife wasn
'
t there, all I could think to do was stick around and see how Tom was doing. I figured maybe I could get a handle on whatever might
'
ve been pushing him to suicide, and then I
'
d be better prepared to get someone to stop him.

"
For a while, it seemed like Tom was feeling all right. He and I did some drinking and bullshittin
'
, and he seemed okay. He was laughing, telling jokes, telling stories...seemed to be having a good time. I thought that maybe my flash wasn
'
t meant to come true for a while, for a few more days at least.

"
Then, after a couple hours, he got quiet. He turned on the TV, and we sat there and watched it, but he wouldn
'
t say a word. Every time I tried to get him talking, he
'
d just ignore me.

"
I started to think maybe he wasn
'
t so okay after all. I started to think maybe what I
'
d seen in my flash was gonna
'
happen real soon.
"
Pacing to one corner of the room, Larry paused briefly with his back to Dave.

"
I didn
'
t know what to do,
"
said Larry, turning then to retrace his course yet again.
"
I knew that if it was gonna
'
happen, it was gonna
'
happen, and I wouldn
'
t be able to stop it. All I could do was try to stay in the house, hope this wasn
'
t the night for him to kill himself.

"
Eventually, he asked me to leave...said he was really tired and had to get some sleep. I told him I
'
d rather stay, because I was too drunk to drive.

"
Well, he didn
'
t want me to stay. We got into a big argument over it, a real shouting match.

"
Finally, he seemed like he was giving in. He was still pissed, but he said he didn
'
t care whether I stayed or not, as long as I stayed outta
'
his way. I laid down on the couch and he turned all the lights off and went upstairs. I thought everything was okay.

"
I should
'
ve known better.

"
Just when I was starting to relax, Tom came back downstairs. He just walked over to me, right to the couch, not saying anything. I asked him what he wanted...and he pulled a big knife out from behind his back.

"
He started waving the knife at me, and he told me to get out. He was...he was just crazy. He said if I didn
'
t get outta
'
there, he
'
d kill me.

"
What was I gonna
'
do?
"
Larry swept his arms wide, threw Dave a querulous, apologetic look.
"
I mean, I thought about trying to take the knife away from him, but he wouldn
'
t let me get close. Every time I went toward him, he backed off and stuck that knife at me.

"
If I tried to fight him, maybe he
'
d
cut
me. Just because I didn
'
t see it in my flash, that didn
'
t mean he couldn
'
t
kill
me.

"
I really didn
'
t know what to do,
"
shrugged Larry.
"
I couldn
'
t think of anything.

"
I tried talking to him, but that didn
'
t do any good. He just kept waving the knife, telling me to get out of his house.

"
He finally started coming at me, and
he had
a crazy look in his eyes...and I just gave up. God help me, I gave up and left.
"
Larry
'
s voice trailed off, and he stopped pacing; standing at the opposite side of the room from Dave, he bowed his head and remained silent for a moment.

"
I really tried, you know,
"
he said at last.
"
I just...like always, I couldn
'
t change things myself. I tried, but I couldn
'
t.

"
When I walked out of the house, I thought about trying to get help somehow...but there just wasn
'
t any way to do it in time. It was too late at night to get somebody...and even if I could, they
'
d be too late to stop Tom. He probably...went upstairs with his knife the minute I walked out the door.
"
Once more, Larry fell silent; when he finally looked up, his expression was bleak and slack, his eyes haunted and hopeless.

"
That
'
s what happened,
"
he said slowly, sounding as if he were depleted of all energy, every last bit of vitality.
"
I couldn
'
t save Tom. I couldn
'
t save Ernie
'
s mom and dad. I couldn
'
t save anyone.

"
Now you know what I can do,
"
said Larry.
"
Absolutely nothing.
"
With a heavy, dejected sigh, he walked to the cot and sat on the edge of the thin mattress.

"
Damn,
"
he said quietly.
"
Maybe I should
'
ve told you sooner. Maybe you could
'
ve helped somehow...talked somebody else into trying to save Ernie
'
s folks, or Tom. You couldn
'
t
'
ve done anything on your own, but maybe you could
'
ve found someone who could help.

"
I don
'
t know,
"
said Larry, shrugging dispiritedly.
"
I guess I just wasn
'
t sure what you
'
d do if I told you the truth. I didn
'
t know if I could trust you or if you
'
d go and tell everybody about
what I can do.