Backtracker (44 page)

"
What good is knowing the future if you can
'
t
change
it
?
"
Larry slung hotly...and then he stopped pacing. Slumping back against a wall, he drew a hand down over his face, rubbed his eyes, his cheeks, his chin.
"
No good,
"
he said defeatedly.
"
It
'
s no good at all.
"
Sighing, he let his thick arms fall to his sides.

"
One time,
"
he said softly, and then he stopped. He swallowed, cleared his throat, started again:
"
One time, there was this...this girl I really liked. I was...I don
'
t know...sixteen, I guess...and she was a little older. We both lived on the same base in Germany.

"
We got to be pretty close. She was tall...and s
he had
the most beautiful long brown hair I
'
ve ever seen in my life.
"
The faintest flicker of a smile tweaked the corners of Larry
'
s mouth...and then it was gone.

"
Anyhow, things were perfect for a while. We were very happy together.

"
Then, one night...I had a flash. It was clear as a bell.
In this flash...I saw the girl...and she was being raped and...raped and beaten...by three guys.
"
Larry shifted restlessly against the wall, took a deep breath.
"
She was being beaten to death...and I saw myself, too...trying to save her...but I couldn
'
t.

"
I saw every detail,
"
Larry said in a pained voice.
"
I knew it would happen in a back alley in Heidelberg. I knew it would happen at exactly eleven
-
fifteen...and it would be Friday, just two nights away...and this girl I loved would die before it was over.

"
I didn
'
t do anything about it at first. I guess I kept hoping it was a false alarm...that for once, my flashes were wrong.

"
Then, the next day, she called and asked me if I wanted to go to Heidelberg with her. She planned to visit some friends of hers who were going to school there.

"
I tried to talk her out of it. I told her I wanted to take her out for dinner instead, to a fancy restaurant in Frankfurt. I begged her to stay in town...said I
'
d been planning this night out for weeks.

"
She really wanted to go to Heidelberg, but I kept pleading with her...and she finally broke down. We agreed to meet at her place the next evening.

"
I thought I
'
d saved her. I really thought I
'
d saved her.
"
Sighing, Larry sadly shook his head.

"
Friday evening,
"
he said slowly,
"
I went to meet her. She was gone.

"
Her father told me she
'
d gone to Heidelberg. He said she was really sorry, but she just had to break our date.

"
I went crazy. I took my parents
'
car and I drove as fast as I could to Heidelberg.

"
I got right into town, almost to where I knew it would happen...and then this other car broadsided me at an intersection.

"
The police came...and it took a long time to get everything ironed out. The car had to be towed. I kept looking at my watch, trying to get away, but I couldn
'
t leave.

"
Finally, I just ran. The car was being towed away and I just ran. I ran the whole way across town, praying that I wasn
'
t too late...that just this once, I could change things.

"
I couldn
'
t, of course,
"
Larry said gravely.
"
I found the alley...and she was there...and so were the three guys. I fought them like a son of a bitch...but I couldn
'
t stop them.

"
They raped and killed her...almost killed me...and then they just left us there.
"
Larry stopped; for a long moment, he was silent. He sniffed, drew in a deep, shuddering breath, released it.

"
So, you see,
"
he said finally, his voice low and hoarse,
"
these flashes of mine don
'
t really do me much good. They show me what
'
s coming, but they don
'
t...I can
'
t change it.
"

After another lengthy pause, Larry pushed away from the wall and resumed his pacing.
"
I guess I should really say that
I
can
'
t change things,
"
he said, and his voice was steadier.
"
I can
'
t
personally
do anything...but for some reason, other people can.

"
It took me a hell of a long time to find this out. I didn
'
t like to tell anybody about the things I saw, so it didn
'
t occur to me for years that other people might be able to help me...that I could
use
them.

"
It was really just an accident that I ever found out. See, I had this flash that some guy I knew was gonna
'
die in a fire. Something was gonna
'
go wrong with the wiring in his house, and the place was gonna
'
go up in flames.

"
Anyway, I was out drinking with another guy, and I was really plastered..
.
and I started talking about bad wiring. I was upset because the one guy was gonna
'
be burned to a crisp, and I knew I couldn
'
t do anything about it...so I babbled to this other guy about bad wiring and how you just never know if it
'
s gonna
'
cause a fire.

"
I really didn
'
t think anything of it at the time. I just went about my business, waiting to hear the bad news when my flash came true over the weekend. The guy was gonna
'
burn, and I knew there wasn
'
t any use in trying to save him.

"
Well, I was in for a surprise. The day after this guy was supposed to die, I was at the bar, feeling sorry for him...and wouldn
'
t you know it, he walked in and sat down next to me!

"
I thought he was a
ghost
!
"
chuckled Larry.
"
I thought he
'
d come to
haunt
me because I hadn
'
t saved his life!

"
He
wasn
'
t
a ghost, though. You know what he told me?

"
He said
'
I just got done rewiring my house
'
!

"
It turned out the other guy...the one I was drinking with before...really got it in his head that bad wiring was a big problem! After I talked to him about it, he decided to check the wiring in his own house...and then he mentioned it to this friend of his, who was the guy who was supposed to die in the fire!

"
The guy I
'
d seen dying in my flash went and checked
his
house...and he fixed the bad wiring that would
'
ve killed him!

"
I couldn
'
t believe it
!
"
Larry said excitedly.
"
One of my flashes didn
'
t come true! It was the first time that
'
d
ever
happened!
"
Newly enthused, Larry began to speak and pace more rapidly.

"
Anyway, I figured that if it worked once, I
'
d keep trying this trick, see if it would do the job again...and it
did
.
It really worked.

"
Well, it worked
some
of the time, anyway,
"
shrugged Larry.

"
See, it
'
s a real touch
-
and
-
go thing. I
'
ve found it all depends on the person I
'
m dealing with, and what I say to him or her. Some people just don
'
t pick up on stuff you tell them. It goes in one ear and right out the other. There
'
ve been plenty of times when I
'
ve tried to maneuver someone to help a person who I knew was gonna
'
die or whatever...and no matter what I did, I couldn
'
t get the one person on the right track.

"
Like I said, what I
tell
people has a lot to do with it, too. The people I use to try to change what I
'
ve seen in my flashes...I have to feed them just the right line. Sometimes, if I tell them too little, if I don
'
t give them a big enough hint, they won
'
t catch on. Sometimes, if I talk about something too much, they
'
ll get tired of listening to me...or it
'
ll be like, they
'
ve heard this so many times, it doesn
'
t sound important anymore.

"
It
'
s tough...telling somebody just the right thing to get them to change the future. It
'
s
never
foolproof, because people are just so damn unpredictable. Lots of times, I
'
ve thought I had someone set to save a guy
'
s life...but for one reason or another, my flash came true anyway.
"
Still pacing, hands folded behind his back, Larry shrugged.

"
I
do
know that it
never
works if I mention that I can see the future. It
'
s weird, but...the times when I
'
ve tried to convince someone to do something, and I
'
ve said that I
know
what
'
s gonna
'
happen...if the person I
'
m working on doesn
'
t laugh in my face...if I get him to
believe
, because I think that
'
s the only way he
'
ll listen to me...the job always falls through.

"
Always
,
"
Larry said forcefully, slashing his hand out and down in a sudden, emphatic gesture.
"
I don
'
t know why, but if I convince someone that I
'
ve got this ability, and I send them out to keep one of my flashes from happening, they
always
fail. It
'
s as if I was going out and trying to change things myself.

"
I really don
'
t understand it, but that
'
s the way it works. The only way I can change the future is by guiding someone to do the job for me, without their knowing that they
'
re being guided. That
'
s one of the reasons why I cover up what I can do, what I can see.

"
It
'
s also the reason why I never told
you
.
"
Larry stopped pacing, halted just a few feet from the mesmerized Dave Heinrich.

"
See, I was trying to
use
you,
"
Larry said soberly.
"
I used you to save your friend Boris...only things didn
'
t turn out like I
'
d planned.