All We Are (8th Sin Book 2) (3 page)

Three days have passed since I had my run in with Nash at the warehouse and I still feel very disturbed by the entire thing. That doesn’t stop me from making plans to see him again one way or another.

“Are you attending that big shindig Jackson has been hounding you about?” Sophie asks from her spot at the pool.

I let out a breath or more a sigh and groan. “These events are so not my thing, but I told him that I would.”

“You poor thing. You have to hang out with a bunch of rich men and woman and drink champagne all night. It’s such a hard life.”

I give her a dirty look and focus on my tan. I’m a little bit nervous about fitting in with Jackson’s friends and fellow co-workers. I’m not his wife; I’m just the girl he is sleeping with on occasions. And if not for him, I wouldn’t have this great job that I have.

“He already bought you a dress. You can’t leave him hanging.”

Maybe I can’t but every little decision I make when it comes to Jackson makes me feel more and more attached to him, and that is the stupidest thing I could do right now when I am trying to focus on something other than romance.

I run from romance. I always have and some days I forget why.

“You’re right. And a little part of me is excited to be hanging on Jackson Luckman’s arm for the entire night.” I grin.

And just like that I’m easily reminded why I like him in the first place. I pick up my phone and dial his number.

He answers on the first ring. “I was just thinking about you.”

I twist a lock of hair around my finger and smile. “Oh were you? Or do you say that to all the girls that call?”

“Only the pretty ones.”

“So you think I’m pretty?” I smile again, having fun with the little game that we are playing.

“So, what’s the verdict?”

“I would love to go with you to this auction.”  I imagine the way his beautiful blue eyes light up when he hears something he likes. And it turns my insides into mush.

“It’s for a good cause. And an excuse to hang out with you all night long.”

I sigh into the phone. “That sounds great. Maybe I will let you convince me to come home with you too.”

“That’s just a matter of how many glasses of champagne you drink.” We poke fun at each other for a few more minutes before he lets me know he has some more work to get done.

I’m excited for tonight, and I’m no longer thinking about the 8
th
sin. I’m only thinking about Jackson’s face and how great he always looks in tuxedos.

***

“You sure clean up well,” he says when I open the door to Sophie’s apartment.

I plant a kiss on his cheek and let him inside. “This was just hanging in my closet.” I smile, looking down at the beautiful black dress he bought me.

He looks around at all the usual spots he would find Sophie but she isn’t home. “Where’s the British invasion?”

“She is on a date.” I grab my keys off of the kitchen counter.

“Do you think I should have got a haircut?” He asks, giving me the smouldering gaze he is so famous for.

I slip my fingers through his hair and smooth it back, brushing some of it off of his forehead but it still finds its way back down.

“You smell good.”  He nods and I plant a kiss on his lips. His fingers skim the thin fabric of my dress following the contour of my spine until he has a hold of my neck. His kiss is powerful and full of passion. And I feel magical whenever I’m connected to him.

The way that he touches me--I know I am special. When his hands are on me, there is not a doubt in my mind that I am appreciated.

He squeezes me tighter and kisses me slower. He tempts my tongue into chase and we feed into each other. He moves me backwards until I am pressed against the kitchen counter.

“We are never going to get to the auction if we keep doing this,” I whisper against his mouth.

His fingers grip the fabric of my dress and he groans. He traces my jaw with the backs of his fingers and then pulls it together. “You’re right, we can do all of this later.” He presses his lips into mine once more. “Because I am going to ask you to come back to my place.”

I have never been to an auction before. And sitting with a group of men and their wives as they silently bid on fancy over the top items is not my idea of what an auction is.

“Next up is this fine diamond necklace,” the auctioneer announces to the crowd.

All the wives gush over the fine piece of jewellery. I’m too busy gazing into Jackson’s eyes.

He whispers in my ear. “That would look beautiful on you.”

I lean into him and inhale his cologne. “It’s a little over the top.”

“You. Covered in diamonds and nothing else.” He plays with my hair, nipping me on the neck. He raises his hand and I shake my head because I can’t believe he is willing to pay way more money than he should for a piece of jewelry.

“
You
are insane.” I take him by the chin and kiss him on the lips.

“What can I say, you bring it out of me,” he raises a dark eyebrow teasing me with his blue eyes. Eyes that rival any other I have ever seen, eyes that are perfectly draped by dark lashes.

He’s a beautiful creature and he doesn’t even care.

The bidding goes on, one man after another bidding for a chance to get their hands on the necklace all of their wives are dying for. But Jackson outbids them every time.

Everyone starts backing down little by little as the price climbs. I squeeze his hand. “Come on, let someone else have it.”

He shakes his head taking a drink of his scotch. “Never.”

I stay quiet and let him do what he wants until he is the winner of the necklace.

“Congratulations, Jackson.” One of the wives at the table says. “That’s a lovely piece. From one of my favourite designers.”

Jackson smiles at me.

She sits forward. “What could a bachelor like you want with such a beautiful piece of jewelry? Is there someone special you haven’t been telling us about?”

She looks right at me when she says it and the other wives join in all nodding and asking him to spill the news. There must be a reason why he would go to such lengths.

“I think what Marta is saying is when is the wedding?” They laugh and I shift uncomfortably in my chair.
Talk about jumping the gun.

Jackson shakes his head. “No wedding. Just showing my appreciation.” He kisses my hand and everyone smiles.

I smile too but secretly I feel bad. Jackson deserves to have a woman by his side that can see a future with him.

“Don’t think like that,” he whispers in my ear.

“How can I not think like that?” I mean he can even read my mind.

“We’ve already talked about this, Savy.” We both watch the next thing up for auction come out. “We only have a few chances in our lives to get it right. And I’m willing to wait.”

That’s why I love you
. But I would never tell him that.

“Jackson, you are such a great man. Someone very lucky is going to be happy to call you theirs one day,” the older lady at the table tells him, giving him sincere eyes.

“I’m sure that is going to happen,” he insist. “Life is not like the romance novels. We don’t find the one and live happily ever after so easily.”

One of the men raises a glass. “You got that right. If only it was that easy.”

Everyone laughs. Jackson squeezes my hand. I pull his into my lap and hold onto him.

***

I watch Jackson makes both of us sandwiches in his kitchen. I’m a little tipsy and he’s equally as tipsy and we’re both hungry.

He takes his time setting up the supplies for turkey sandwiches.

“I still can’t believe you bought that necklace for me,” I look at the box sitting on the counter.

“Do you want mustard?” He doesn’t even acknowledge how generous he has been tonight.

I shake my head. “That was a lot of money for a necklace.”

“Mayo?”

“No. I don’t like mayo.” I take a seat on the bar stool across from him and start closing the bags for him. “Does it make you uncomfortable when they ask you about dating?”

He shakes his head. “Curiosity is all that it is.” He takes two plates from the cupboard behind him and turns back around. “I’m at the age most of them got married.”

“Do you think you should be married because of your age?”

“I think I should be married when I’m in love. Now eat your sandwich.” He pushes my plate toward me.

I lift it and sigh. “And obviously you think that you are in love otherwise you wouldn’t have asked me to marry you.”

He chews thoughtfully. I look down at my plate, I want to say so much more but I am afraid of ruining the night.

“I asked you because I’m in love with you.”

That little voice in my head tells me that I am horrible for taking him for granted. I should be honest and tell him that I am not sure I even want to be in love with him for fear of screwing it up.

He puts his sandwich down. “Come here.”

“Why?”

“Because you are overthinking and I hate when you do that.”

I stand up and go around the counter. He pats the marble, directing me to take a seat, so he can reassure me for the second time tonight that I am not breaking his heart.

I lift myself up and he moves in front of me. And now he is looking at me. And I just want to look away and break our stare down because he has no inhibitions.  Me on the other hand, I feel like I am under a microscope.

“One of the things that I love about you is how honest you always are with people.” He touches my face. “Never once have I felt like you are leading me on.”

I don’t say anything.

“I like you, Savy for so many reasons. Some I can’t even explain,” he says, in barely a whisper. “If that means I can’t have you the way I want, I’ll take it.”

Every bad thought crumbles.

And now I’m smiling, like some lovesick fool.

Jackson doesn’t care that I don’t know if I love him. And he is willing to wait until I figure that out. That’s how in love with the idea of us he is.

That’s just how great of a man he is.

So why am I just not giving in?

Why am I wondering if there is something else out there?

What is wrong with me?

This makes me feel like a horrible person. I should feel like a horrible person because horrible people play with other people’s hearts.

I look at him and I can tell he wants me to forget all the bad parts and just accept things the way that they are. And I want to accept things the way that they are because being with him is great and I can’t think of one bad thing about any of it.

I want to tell him that I think he is everything I am looking for and that I secretly think that I love him too. But that’s not something you should tell someone who has already admitted to wanting to be with you for the rest of their life, unless you are sure that you feel the same way.

“I’m not really sure what to say,” I say.

He smiles and then sighs, probably grateful I said anything. “Then don’t say anything.”

I nod in agreement and we just stare each other down from an awkwardly close distance. I like looking at him and he loves looking at me.

“I could look at you all day. You’re that attractive,” I tell him.

He shakes his head in disagreement because he thinks that I am insane for saying something like that out loud.

But it’s true. Jackson is breathtakingly handsome.

“You are. Just accept it.” I poke him in the nose.

He nods his head. He’s finally accepted that he is hot thanks to me.

“Only if you say so,” he says, amused.

“I say so.” I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him closer. “Now that you know how hot you are I think we can discuss other things.”

He doesn’t take his eyes off of me. “I’m all ears.” He smirks.

“I think the only solution for the current situation, being how much we both care about one another is lots of sex. We should be having sex right now.”

“Oh, you think you have all the answers.” His smirk turns into a full on grin.

I don’t have any of the answers, that’s why I am having such a hard time falling into this love that I feel for you.

“I can’t see how you wouldn’t agree with me,” I say, moving in to get even closer to his lips.

He gets even closer as well. “I agree with you wholeheartedly. Every single word and every single letter that is coming out of those beautiful lips of yours.”

I wait for the kiss but he holds off. Now he is toying with me and I don’t like it because the only part of me that seems to be working right now is what’s between my legs.

I’d be willing to say or do anything that Jackson wants if that means he will put his hands on me. And I think he knows that, I can tell by the way he is looking at me.

“So, what are we waiting for then? You should be taking my clothes off as we speak. Maybe I should put on that necklace you bought me.”

He licks his lips, watching my mouth. “Right now huh?”

I nod. “Yes, right now.”

He tilts his head like he is really giving it a lot of thought. “I think I can do that.”

He starts with the zipper sliding it down carefully. I help him get me out of the arm of my dress, not taking my eyes off of him. My dress drops around my waist. I’m glad I am wearing my favourite bra.

He slides his hands through my hair. And drops my heart to my stomach by brushing his thumbs across my cheeks, he concentrates on my mouth and the shaky sigh that slips from my lips.

“Jackson,” I whisper.

He presses his lips into mine, solidifying how much I enjoy every single tiny second that we have together. Especially the ones when we are touching.

My tongue greets his and I am obliterated by his essence and everything else that makes him who he is. He does a beautiful job at turning me into a blob of a person.

Every thing he is doing is turning me into an idiot.

A love drunk idiot.

He is taking what he wants; showing me how much he wants what I have.

Who can deny something so right?

I know I can’t.

I run my hands through his hair, down his back, enjoying everything that I could have for a lifetime, if I just said the word yes.

Jackson’s hands on my neck, he guides his mouth against mine and then tugs me closer.

I drop down off of the counter and he takes me by the hand leading me to his bedroom.

When we make it in his bedroom, he loosens his tie and takes it off. He watches me slip the rest of the way out of my dress and then we stare each other down.

“Nice bra,” he says, smiling at the lace. It’s my favourite and I love that he appreciates it.

I take it off and he moves closer.

“What about these?” I touch the matching panties.

He nods. “I’m pretty sure they would look better on the floor.”

I step forward and let him have at it.  He traces the backs of his fingers down my stomach creating a fire on the inside.

When his fingers stop moving and he looks at me, I touch his face. “I love this.” I want him to know that.

“Me too,” he kisses me on the lips. And I climb onto his bed. Pushing the covers away so I can get more comfortable and he watches my every move before he climbs in himself.

I lie down and look up at the ceiling. “Does anything ever worry you?”

He’s on his side, his fingers running through my hair as he listens to me.

“Of course.”

I look over at him. “Like what, tell me.”

He continues running fingers through my hair, I like when he touches me—every way he touches me is as good as the rest.

“I worry that I’ll never figure out how to really be happy,” he tells me. And this is the first time I have heard Jackson say this. “But I’m a stubborn guy and I refuse to stop until I find it.”

“That’s very brave of you,” I tell him. “Some people live their entire life afraid of that.”

He nods. “I’d much rather be kissing you right now than talking about this stuff.” He makes a face.

So kiss me.

He takes me by the chin and does. Tongues intertwining, lips meshing and groans coming from both him and me as we twist and tangle ourselves all across his bed sheets.

He stops kissing me and says. “I don’t think I would know what to do if I couldn’t do this whenever I wanted.” And he kisses me again.

What I like the most about sex with Jackson is everything. But to be completely honest it’s everything that leads up to that. How well he pays attention to my feelings, my every word.

He knows what he wants. He takes what he wants and he gives me anything I want until I can’t take anymore. In all ways that he is a gentleman, Jackson is totally not that in the bedroom.

He slips down to my stomach and I groan at the feel of his tongue against my skin, gliding across my rib cage, swirling around my bellybutton.