Alaskan Exposure (17 page)

“Okay,” Charley said. She didn’t want to fight with this
girl. She knew it was foolish to argue with someone who was obviously
inebriated. Though, she couldn’t have been more shocked. Varinka could not have
been more than twenty-one or twenty-two. She was still a kid. Charley
recognized that she was the adult and just agreed with her claims.

“He always comes back to Varinka. He loves me.” She flailed
her arms and smacked one of her friends in the back of the head. “Not this
bitch.”

Her friends grabbed her and moved her quickly toward the
exit. The little blonde who had been helping, stopped and turned to Charley.
She had a guttural accent that might have been Dutch or another northern
European country. “I’m so sorry, madam. Please, she’ll be fired if anyone
reports that she was rude to a passenger. I know she shouldn’t have said
anything, but they’ll put her off right here and she’ll have to find her own
way home.”

“I won’t report her.”

The blonde’s shoulders slumped. “Thank you, madam. I’m truly
sorry and Varinka will be as well when she is sober again.”

“Go take care of your friend. Don’t worry about me.”

The blonde moved to walk away, but then turned around. She
looked as if she was debating over her next words. “Madam, I know it’s not my
business, but what she said about Mr. Macintyre, is not true. She wishes it
were, but it’s not.”

Charley didn’t know what to say. She just nodded, and the
girl ran to join her friends.

“Well, that was exciting,” Drew said.

“I thought we were going to have a catfight,” Bob added
laughing.

They all joked about the incident as they left the Irish
pub. The cool air of Canada felt wonderful after the stale, stuffy bar. Charley
took deep breaths and tried not to think about Varinka or Oswald.

As soon as they were back onboard the group went to the
martini bar. Charley pulled Bob aside and said goodbye before she made her way
back to her cabin. They had a flight at eleven in the morning out of Seattle
and she had to pack her suitcase and gear.

Jules’ suitcase was already out on the small couch and
looked to be nearly packed. Charley started with her camera equipment and
methodically secured it all in her bag before she started on her clothes. It
was quiet, maybe too quiet as she thought about all the wonderful memories she
would take back home with her. She ignored the sharp pangs in her chest and
just kept folding clothes and stuffing them into her bag.

At midnight, the ship pulled away from the dock at Victoria.
Charley felt the gentle rocking as they left port. She thought about Varinka
and hoped that the girl had gotten aboard without too much notice. She hated
the idea that she might be put off the ship and stranded in Canada having to
fend for herself.

At one in the morning, the knock on the stateroom door made
her nearly leave her skin. Her heart raced as she looked through the peephole
and found Kyle’s distorted image looking back at her from the corridor. Even
the fishbowl effect of the glass peephole could not hide how beautiful he was.

She pulled the door open. His smile nearly brought tears to
her eyes. Why did he look so happy? Why wasn’t he devastated the way she was?

As soon as he saw her face, his smile faded and he backed
her into the room. “What’s wrong?”

His questions made her so angry she nearly couldn’t speak.
She actually sputtered for a second. “What’s wrong? You know what, Kyle. If you
have to ask me what’s wrong, then you should just go back to your own room.”

She pushed him back toward the door but after two steps
backward, he stopped and stood his ground. “Look, we both knew that this week
was going to come to an end. That’s what vacations are like. You go and have a
good time, and then they end. You act as if this is a surprise.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Are you trying to make this better?”

The only good thing that had come from Kyle’s visit was she
no longer wanted to cry. Now she wanted to punch him in the nose. In the back
of her head, a voice was screaming at her to stop and think. All the emotions
built up inside her would not allow the logic through.

Kyle said, “I’m trying to be realistic and logical.”

“Go away, Kyle.” Her voice was loud enough that if there
were people in the corridor they would be able to hear.

His eyes widened. “Did something happen today?”

She couldn’t tell him about Varinka. She wasn’t going to
cost the girl her job. Besides, that girl had nothing to do with the fact that
no good could come of letting him stay with her for one more night. Every
moment was torture at this point. “No. Just go.”

Kyle looked down at his feet for a moment and then up at
her. His voice was only slightly above a whisper. Sorrow dripped from every
word. “Okay, if that’s what you want, Charley. I’ll go.”

Her heart literally felt as if it were splitting in two. She
thought she might throw up. Her tattered heart was screaming at her to do
something to fix this.
Tell him how you feel. Beg him to go with you to Florida.
Ask him if you can stay. Do something.
But her head said to make a clean
break now. It will hurt less than dragging this out for days or weeks. It was
an impossible situation.

“That’s what I want. Goodbye, Kyle.” Her eyes burned with
unshed tears.

He never took his eyes from her face. She could see myriad
emotions flying through their beautiful blue depths. Before she knew what he
was going to do, he pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly. His mouth
pressed against her temple. “I guess you have your reasons. Take care of
yourself, Charley.”

A minute later, he was gone from her stateroom and from her
life. The room was so empty it was stifling. Charley stood staring at the
closed door for twenty minutes. Her feet demanded that she run after him,
apologize and tell him that she loved him. She’d never told him. As that
thought hit her, the first tear pushed over her bottom lid. She barely saw the
rest of her packing through the waterfall that followed.

The corridor outside Charley’s stateroom seemed endless as
he walked the length of it to the forward stairwell.
What just happened?

He had fully intended to go up the one flight to his
stateroom but found himself continuing to climb and then crossing the short
distance to the Constellation Lounge. There was always a going away party there
on the last night of the cruise. People were happy and sad that it was over. He
just wanted a drink.

“What can I get you, Kyle?”

Kyle had barely noticed the crisp white arm of the
bartender’s sleeve as he leaned over the bar toward him.

He looked up. “Vodka, rocks, Gene.”

“No shift tonight, sir?”

Kyle gave a weak smile. It was none of the bartender’s
business, but it was nice to have friends who cared enough about him to ask.
“No. I have the next forty-eight off.”

Gene nodded and a minute later placed the drink in front of
him.

The glass was half empty when he noticed he was no longer
alone at the bar.

Jules sipped at her own clear liquid and watched him. “Where
is Charley?”

He shrugged. “Sleeping, I guess.”

“She didn’t want to come with you?”

He shrugged. He didn’t want to discuss his relationship with
Charley’s friend. A moment later, he found himself talking in spite of his
determination to keep quiet. “I guess she just didn’t want the same things I
wanted.”

Jules wrapped her dark-red lips around the straw and sucked
in the last of her cocktail. She looked up at him. “She’s cautious. She has a
right to be. She doesn’t see how it can work out.”

Gene came over, and Jules ordered another gin and tonic.

“Maybe she doesn’t want it to work out.”

“I think she does, but she’s afraid. She was feeling better
but then the thing with that girl tonight probably freaked her out.”

He was only half listening, but caught bits and pieces of
what Jules said. “What girl?”

Jules raised her eyebrow. “The Russian girl, at the pub in
Victoria. Charley didn’t tell you?”

“No.” She had his full attention. His heart started to race.
Could something have happened that Charley didn’t tell him about?

Jules looked uncomfortable. She frowned as if deciding what
to say next. “I guess she didn’t want to get the kid fired.”

He had no idea what Jules was talking about. “There are a
lot of people in Victoria. It’s a busy city.”

“This one works on the ship and said you were her guy. It
was pretty tense there for a moment. She was drunk and we all just laughed it
off.” Jules shrugged.

“I told Charley how I feel about her. What more am I
supposed to do?”

Jules took her drink from the bar. “More,” she said.

He watched her walk away. She crossed the room to a group of
tables that Drew and the others had pulled together. Drew got up and kissed her
cheek before they both left the lounge.

* * * * *

He ran down the dock once he saw her familiar red hair
moving away toward the taxi stand.

“Charley, wait.”

She turned. Her eyes were red and puffy. She really looked
terrible, as if she hadn’t slept all night. That made him feel a bit better. At
least she wasn’t apathetic to their situation.

She looked away and watched the street for her ride.

“You are really just going to walk away without even talking
to me. I want to be understanding, Charley, but you really make me mad.”

Finally, she turned toward him. “What am I supposed to say?
You have a life here on a ship. I have a life in Florida. We had a good time.
That’s it. Now I go back to reality and you go back to…whatever.”

“Is that really what you want?”

“It doesn’t matter what I want. It’s life, Kyle.”

She kept her large suitcase in front of her as if it was a
suit of armor, shielding her from him. He looked at Jules but the brunette kept
her eyes averted.

A large black car pulled up to the curb. The young man that
got out called her name. She nodded and gave him a weak smile. The driver came
over and took her suitcase. She looked lost.

Kyle took a step forward and wrapped her in his arms. She
was afraid, he knew that was the problem. He hated that he had some part in
causing her pain. Why did she have to feel so good in his arms? Why did his
heart feel as if it was going to push out of his chest? “Charley a long time ago
my father told me something that has made all the difference.”

Her arms finally came around his back. They gripped at him
as if she might pull herself inside his skin.

“What was that?” she asked.

He broke the hug and kissed her hard on the lips. “Life is exactly
what you make of it. Good or bad, ultimately, you are in control.”

He could see she was about to say something but he cut her
off. “What happened with your ex was not in your control, but everything that
happened since then was up to you. Meeting on this ship was a moment of fate,
but what happens from now on is determined by the two of us.”

“I don’t understand,” she said, and tears started down her
cheeks.

Her tears were breaking his heart. She needed more than he
could give her at that moment. He was only a first officer on a ship. He had
another three months on his current contract. None of it was fair. Yet his
father’s words continued to echo in his head.

The driver held open the back door and Jules climbed in.

“I’ll call you,” Kyle said.

“I don’t see what good can come of that.”

“I’ll call you.”

“Don’t,” was the last word she said as she climbed into the
car and drove south away from him.

It should have been the happiest night of her life. A
gallery show. An entire section of a major art gallery dedicated to just her
photographs and she felt as if her heart were breaking all over again.

“Are you dressed yet?” Jules hollered from the living room.

She heard the fabric tear as she pulled off the third dress
she’d tried on. She tugged it over her head and threw it in the corner of the
room. “Shit.”

“That didn’t sound good.” Jules stepped into the bedroom.
She looked perfect in a black cocktail dress with her hair bouncing around her
shoulders. Red pumps and a red clutch purse rounded out the ensemble.

“That was the third one. I have nothing to wear. I’m not
going.” She sank down on the end of her bed.

“Oh shut up.”

“What?” While her friend always spoke her mind, she’d never
told her to shut up before.

“You heard me. This is your big night. Put on the black
slinky one you wore on the cruise, fix your hair and let’s go before we’re
late.”

“I said, I’m not going.” Charley’s stomach was in knots. She
was probably going to vomit at any moment. She would not be bullied.

“You are going. You, Drew and I are going to get into the
car in ten minutes and go to your beautiful show.” Jules came and sat next to
her. Her voice softened. “Look, you have done nothing but work on making those
pictures perfect for the past three months. At times, I thought you were
working yourself sick. It’s a big night. I know you’re tired and nervous, but
we are going. Drew came down from New Jersey for this and frankly, I’m not
missing my best friend’s first real show.

“So pick your perky little ass up off the bed and put on the
slinky black dress, or I’m going to drag you out of here in your lacy bra and
panties.”

Charley looked down at her underwear and back at Jules, who
did not look as if she was joking. “Fine. I’ll be right out. Apologize to Drew
for me.”

“No need. He’s a very patient man.” Jules winked and left
the bedroom.

As promised, ten minutes later they were in the car.
Charley’s stomach rolled and churned with every stop and start of the SUV. Each
time they rounded a corner, she was sure she would have to scream at Drew to
pull over or lose her lunch in the back of Jules’ vehicle. Somehow, magically,
she made it to the gallery without losing her stomach contents. The car was
taken away by a young man in a red jacket. She quietly followed Drew and Jules
inside the glass doors.

Her parents rushed over to meet her. Her father smiled but
her mother had a sour look on her face. Charley’s stomach flipped again.

“I don’t understand half of these pictures,” Beverly said.

“It’s a great show, little girl. I’m very proud of you,”
Jack said.

“Thank you both for coming.” It was the first time either
one had shown any interest in her work.

“I still don’t know what some of the pictures are supposed
to be,” her mother continued.

Her father snapped at his wife. “That’s not the point,
Beverly.”

Charley said, “Some of them are a bit abstract, Mom.”

“I think it all looks great.” He was talking to her mother
and not her, which was good since his voice pitched with anger.

An instant later, they were bickering between themselves.

The gallery owner Frederique Manard whisked her away and
after that there was no time to think about anything.

He was only a few inches taller than her and wore a
perfectly tailored black, pin-striped suit. His shoes were polished to a gleam
and his light salmon shirt didn’t show a single crease. “This is a singular
event, Miss Ballantine. I can’t tell you how many compliments your work is
getting. I’ve already had two offers on the shadowy deck and one on the eagle
in flight. Several people are talking about the icebergs, the whales and the
glacier but I’m holding off on taking bids, since there is so much interest.
We’ll wait until the end of the night and drive the price up.”

She felt clumsy next to his perfect grooming. “Wow, I had no
idea this would be so…big.”

“You’re photographs are amazing. You must know that.” He
watched her as if waiting for a response. When she was silent on the subject,
he smiled showing perfect white teeth that must have been caps or veneers.

Finally, she managed to mumble a thank-you.

“Leave everything to me, and we will both do well tonight,
Miss Ballantine. When is your next trip? I’m already anticipating your second
show being even bigger than this one.”

“I don’t know.”

He stared at her as if he expected her to say more.

Her heart was pounding. The white walls began to close in.
“Soon.”

That seemed to appease Mr. Manard. “I’m sure some of the
buyers will want to meet you. Go get yourself a glass of champagne and mingle.
You really should be very proud of your accomplishment.”

She didn’t know about being proud or the mingling, but the
champagne was a good idea. She’d seen a table where a bar was set up when they
arrived and turned to find it.

“I’d like to know the answer to that last question too,
Charley.” Kyle held two glasses of champagne. He passed one toward her.

Instinctively, she took it. “You’re here.”

“Did you think I would miss your show?” He looked perfectly
at ease in a gray double-breasted suit, blue shirt and tie. He might have just
stepped out of a men’s magazine. There was no sign of his uniform. He was just
a well-dressed man out for the evening.

Her heart had lodged itself in her throat. It was
impossible, but he was even more attractive off the ship than he had been
onboard. She had to swallow twice before she could get her throat to open up
for speech. “How did you know about my show?”

He frowned and closed the gap between them. “Not because you
told me or even took one of my phone calls. We can both attest to that.”

She turned away. He had called more than a dozen times in
the last three months. She guessed he tried to reach her whenever the ship was
in a US port. It would have only made her feel worse to talk to him. Though in
retrospect, she wasn’t sure she could actually feel any worse. Still, she had
listened to each message over and over again, addicted to the sound of his
voice.

She straightened her shoulders. “If you’re so angry, why did
you come?”

He ran his fingers along the curve of her upper arm. “For
the same reason I chased you down a dock in Seattle and called you twenty times
since then.”

She ignored what he was obviously trying to tell her. It
would kill her to hear him say those words. “How did you know?”

One side of his mouth turned up in a half smile. “Jules told
me about it.”

She looked around the room and found Jules standing with
Drew in a corner. They admired the close-up she’d taken of Kyle the first time
she saw him. She had struggled with whether or not to display the intimate
smile he’d given her through the lens. In the end, the photo had been too
beautiful not to share. Though, it was also the only photograph that was not
for sale. She couldn’t bear for someone else to have him.

Looking at it now, even with the real man standing so close,
the memory of that moment sent chills down her spine.

Kyle stepped behind her and spoke low in her ear. “When I
couldn’t reach you, I called her. She told me about the show, and I made some
arrangements.”

Just his voice and breath on her lobe had her body shaking
with desire. She turned, unable to endure two of him at once. She looked up
into eyes she never thought she’d see in person again. Tears blurred her sight.
He took his cocktail napkin and dabbed them out of the corners. “Don’t you dare
cry unless it’s with the joy of seeing me again.”

That made her laugh so hard she snorted and people turned to
look. Her cheeks warmed and she covered her mouth. “What arrangements?”

He smiled. “See, now that’s a sensible question.”

“Is there a sensible answer?”

He smiled and looked around the room. “This is quite a show,
Charley. I’m impressed with what you saw. I’ve seen those sights dozens of
times but you see things differently. You see things with an artist’s eye.
Amazing.”

“You’re not going to tell me?” Her stomach was churning
again and her heart pounded.

“I want the answer to my question first and I had the
impression you didn’t want to talk about your next trip at the moment.”

“I haven’t made any decisions yet.”

She could see his eyes shut in her peripheral vision. What
was he thinking?

“God, you smell good,” he said.

He smelled amazing too and he looked even better, but she
was making an effort not to look as if she was some oversexed teenager. This
was her first professional showing. It was the night that could make or break
her career.

He took her hand. “Come on. I saw that your parents are
here. Introduce me.”

If anything was going to chase him away, this was the
moment. She nodded and walked across to where her parents were staring
sour-faced at the whale’s eye. She took a deep breath. “Mom, Dad, this is my
friend, Kyle.”

She probably should have given him a better title, but she
hadn’t had time to think of anything.

Her father held out his hand and began barraging Kyle with
questions. Her mother narrowed her eyes and said nothing, which was probably a
blessing. Though, Charley knew it wouldn’t last.

Kyle handled the interrogation splendidly, answering every
question and never allowing the older man to ignite his temper.

When they finally managed to get away from them, he smiled
at her in a way that made her think he might drag her out of the gallery like a
caveman. She might have let him.

“That was interesting,” he said.

“I’m sorry. They can be…”

“Don’t finish the sentence. I’m not interested in your
parents. I’m only interested in you.”

She thought her heart might burst. Her chest ached with the
tenderness of the declaration. She almost forgot about the show and the room
full of people.

Smiling, he pulled her deeper into the crowd and stood by
her the entire night while she mingled and did an impression of a successful
artist. All the while, she wondered if he tasted the same as he had three
months earlier. It was the longest evening of her life.

In the end, Mr. Manard had been right, every picture sold
and the icebergs had gone for an outrageous amount.

A dozen or more attendees were still milling around
negotiating for prices and asking if more work would be available and when.
Frederique Manard was in his element. Charley watched from the back corner of
the room.

Kyle’s fingers slid up her arm, from her wrist to the inside
of her elbow. “Come with me.”

Without thinking, she followed him out a back door, down a
hall and out another door that led to an alley between two buildings. “What are
we doing here, K—?”

His body pressed her against the wall as his mouth consumed
his name. Her pussy ached and she couldn’t help pressing her hips forward
against him. His cock jutted between them. With his tongue plundering her
mouth, she had no opportunity to tell him that she had a condo fifteen minutes
away. Even if the opportunity had presented itself, she wasn’t sure she would
have told him. There was something about the possibility that at any moment
someone could come into that alley and find them. She should have been
mortified by the idea, but she was excited and turned on.

He tugged her formfitting dress up until she could feel the
stucco wall’s roughness on her ass. His fingers found her thong and he pulled
the tiny triangle aside and dipped one finger between her folds. His mouth was
on her ear, teasing and nibbling the lobe. Every touch had her gasping for
more.

She had never done anything so crazy in her life. It had
never even occurred to her until the cruise that it might be exciting to have
sex anyplace but a bedroom. Now she found herself wondering how far she might
be willing to go.

His finger worked her clit expertly. Every rub drew a cry
from her lips. His body moved up and down hers, rubbing against her nipples and
heightening her pleasure. The hard wall scratched her skin, but even that added
to her pleasure.

“Kyle, I’m going to come.”

He covered her mouth with his to muffle the sound of her cry
as her pussy pulsed and her body stiffened in his hands. The waves of orgasm
crashed around her. Her ears rang with the blood flooding her head. Kyle’s hand
cupped her pussy, pressing tight as the sensation passed and liquid flowed down
her thighs.

“Charley, you feel so good.”

She had to gasp for air. Her body shook, but he held her
tight.

“I missed you, Kyle.” As soon as she said it, she wished she
could take the words back.

He immediately stilled and the kisses he was raining down on
her neck stopped. “Then why didn’t you answer the phone?”

She suddenly felt very exposed and tugged her dress down
over her hips. “Why didn’t you ask me to stay with you three months ago?”

In spite of the anger she saw in his eyes, he put two
fingers in his mouth and licked her juices off the digits. He leaned in so that
his mouth hovered over hers. “You never gave me the chance. You threw me out of
your room that last night and ran away in the morning as if the ship were on
fire.”

The back door opened and Mr. Manard poked his head out.
“There you are. The buyer of the icebergs wants to meet you, if you have a few
minutes.”

Kyle blocked most of her body from the door. She cleared her
throat. “I’ll be there in just a minute.”

The door closed and Kyle took a step back. If he was angry
with her, she couldn’t tell. He smoothed his hand over her hair and
straightened the top of her dress where it had gone far enough to the right so
that her lace bra was exposed. He smiled down at her. “You may need a quick
stop in the ladies’ room.”