Against the Wall (16 page)

Mel leans back against her counter with a wine glass in her hand. “Veggie wrap?”

“
Yes,” I groan. “He’s a vegetarian.” Mel almost spits out her wine. I wait for her to swallow what she has in her mouth before I tell her the rest. “And he drinks wine coolers.”

Her mouth drops in complete horror. “Yeah, I know,” I mutter.

She ambles to the fridge and whips out another beer for me. “You so deserve another one of these. And let’s order pizza.”

I down what’s left of my first beer, and swipe the other one from her hand. “Meat Lovers,” I tell her and we both laugh till Mel starts snorting.

Matty and I spend most of the time leading up to Christmas at my house, messing around, watching movies, playing video games, and eating. Mel makes an appearance a few times, but for the most part we just exist … happily … together.

I’m clearing our dessert plates when Matty asks me, “So what are you doing for the holidays?”

“
Going to my parent’s house on Christmas Eve, and then to Mel’s Christmas day. You?”

“
I’m going to my folk’s house too. I’m actually gonna leave tomorrow and won’t be back until the day after Christmas,” he explains.

“
Holy shit. I’m not gonna see you for four days.” My heart suddenly feels like a brick in my chest and I can’t believe I’m so affected by the thought of being away from Matty for such a short time. Four days really isn’t that long, but right now it feels like an eternity and he hasn’t even left yet.

Matty takes a spoon from my hand and places it in the sink. He faces me and runs his long fingers through my wavy hair. “Two really. I’m not gonna leave here until the morning and I’ll see you the day I come back.” He reels me in for a hug, and smacks a kiss on my mouth. It eases my heartache just a little, but not much. I’ve gotten so used to having him around, it’s going to be quiet and lonely without him. “You’re gonna be so busy with your parents and Mel, you won’t even miss me.”

“
Fine,” I tell him, not entirely convinced. Resting my head on his chest, I soak in his familiar citrusy scent that brings the outdoors in to me. I gaze up into his sparkling blue eyes that crinkle at the edges and stretch my face toward his. He meets me the rest of the way for a kiss that’s soft and gentle but has enough heat to send sparks all the way down to my girl parts. “We better make tonight count then.”

And we do. Make it count.

Matty leaves my house in the morning to pack for his two-hour trip up the coast to see his parents.

“
I miss him already,” I tell Mel over coffee and donuts.

“
Oh, shut your ass. He’s been gone for like two seconds,” she sneers, chomping on a maple bar. No sympathy from her.

“
Look at us,” I say, peering around my place. Not a single holiday decoration on display. “You wouldn’t know it’s Christmas time. I didn’t even decorate around here. Neither did you.” I didn’t put out stockings, I didn’t get a tree, and all the presents I have are wrapped in gift bags in the trunk of my car. The only thing representing the holidays is the dish of Dove chocolates on my coffee table. And that was just chance. I didn’t go shopping for chocolates in green and red foils.

She waves me off, taking a drink of her Amaretto splashed cup of Joe. “What the hell for? It’s not like I’m going to dig out all the shit by myself just for me. Too much trouble for nothing.”

She’s right. I nibble on my glazed donut, savoring every bite, trying to make it last as long as possible. “This is our first holiday without Chase and Nick. Weird huh?”

“
It’s so fucking crazy. I can’t believe it. We’re gonna go home and everyone’s going to be hovering all over us, checking to see if we’re okay. People are gonna be talking shit, saying we can’t keep a man. I bet you some people think we’re lesbians.”

We both laugh so hard we snort.

“
I really don’t look forward to my family asking questions,” I confide. “They’re all gonna say what a shock it was and they thought we’d be together forever. And they’re sure I’ll meet a decent man soon, yada yada yada.”

“
Well, at least they’ll have something right,” Mel says.

“
I don’t plan on telling them about Matty,” I respond. “I don’t want to jinx anything before it’s something.”

She shakes her head at me. “I’ve got news for you, Shel. It already is something. I don’t care what you’re calling it, or not calling it. You and Matty are a couple.”

“
No, we’re not,” I shout. “We’re just seeing how things go. Until I’m ready. For sure. We’re not rushing anything. I’m even dating other people.” My mind flashes back to Jacob. And I smirk at the thought of wine coolers. He’s lucky we’re on vacation or it would have been all over school. He’d lose his man card for sure.

“
Stop being a dumb ass. You guys practically live together, and you’re doing everything short of actual penetration, so I’d say you’re an effing couple. So stop being so scared and just go for it.” She pours another cup of coffee, heavy on the liquor.

“
You’re not nice,” I pout, sticking out my bottom lip.

“
Well, you’re not being nice to Matt. Put him out of his misery and just tell him you love him.”

I suck my lip back in and scrunch my face. Suddenly I feel like I’m in knots. “But I don’t know yet,” I screech. “He’s the first guy I’ve gone out with since Chase. How do I know he’s not just my rebound guy? How do I know he’s the one? I thought Chase was the one. Look how that turned out.”

“
Chase was not
the one
. He was an ass who was convenient,” she says, picking out another donut from the pink box. This time a chocolate bar.

She did not just say that. I did
not
spend practically my entire life with a man out of convenience. We were good together. We were. Really.

Mel and I pull up to my parents’ house.

“
You ready to be thrown to the wolves?” she asks me.

“
Only if you are,” I respond.

“
I’m not worried about your house. They’re gonna love me like always. I’m shitting my pants about tomorrow. My tías are gonna be all up in my masa,” she says, waving her hand around her face. No doubt they’re going to be in her business before she even walks in the door.

I put my hand up to high five her. “True that, sister. Let’s get this shiz over with, and then we can go back to my house and get drunk.”

She slaps my hand with hers and we take our first step up the walk of shame to my parents’ front door.

“
Shelly, there you are. I was wondering when you were going to arrive,” my mother sneers, taking her first jab at me. I guess fifteen minutes isn’t considered fashionably late, it’s just rude by her standards. As if I didn’t know this already. But obviously, I don’t care. Oh well. I learned a long time ago, there is no pleasing this lady.

“
Nice to see you too, Mother,” I say, and air kiss her cheek.

“
Oh, Melissa, it’s so wonderful to see you. You look great, doesn’t she, Shel?” My mother gathers Mel in a dramatic embrace fit for TV when a mother gets reunited with her long lost daughter who she hasn’t seen since birth.

I roll my eyes. “Oh course she does.”

Mel winks at me. If we make it out of here without me strangling my mother, I’ll deserve a gold fucking medal.

My dad greets us next. He envelops me in a bear hug. “Hey, sweetie. It’s nice to see you.”

“
Nice to see you too, Daddy,” I say, as he puts me down.

“
Would it kill you to visit your old man more often?” he asks, gazing down at me from his big brown eyes.

I glance over at my mom. “It might.”

He gives me a disapproving look. He knows exactly what I mean, but always tries to play devil’s advocate where she’s concerned.

Dad turns his attention to Mel. “Hey, Melly, good to see you too. I haven’t seen Nick on the street yet, but when I do I plan on having a few words with him.” He holds up his fist to show us exactly what he means by words.

“
Sounds good to me,” she says, hugging my father. “You can throw in an uppercut for me if you want. I won’t be mad at you.”

He winks at her, and says, “Well, I’ll leave you two fine ladies to mingle. For some strange reason, there are a lot more bachelors here than usual.”

My dad bends down to whisper in my ear, “But word is you're doing fine in the
boy
department. I'm really happy about this. I've always liked Fuller.”

I'm going to kill my brother when I see him.

My dad walks away and I whip my head around to see Mel with her mouth hanging open.

“
It wasn't me,” she says.

“
I know exactly who it was,” I tell her. “Ugh. And now my mom is trying to marry us off too.”

Mel and I look at each other, and I frown in fear.

“
I’ll save you if you save me. I can’t believe my mother is plotting already,” I tell Mel, as I take her arm for protection. I really don’t feel like meeting any bachelors right now.

“
You got it,” she says. “But, hey, I don’t have a Matty waiting for me at home. So I may not need saving.” She raises her brows at me and I jokingly smack her arm. She doesn’t want to get involved with anyone my mother would deem appropriate. She’s had plenty of that nonsense with Nick.

We make our way into the dining room to scope out the food. My mother always out does herself for Christmas: turkey, roast, mashed potatoes, too many casseroles to count, and about fifty different types of baked desserts. I don’t know how I didn’t learn how to cook like her. Oh wait, yes I do. I’d have to be able to tolerate her long enough to actually learn from her. During the eighteen years I spent in this house, according to her, I never poured a bowl of cereal correctly.

During the holidays, I would always try to help my mother in the kitchen at the request of my dad, but she always scoffed at how I did things. Cracking an egg with two hands instead of one. Using a slotted spoon instead of a ladle. Cooking with vegetable oil when she would have used extra virgin olive oil. I could never do anything right. When I finally moved out, I did try to come over early to help out but eventually it got to the point where I am today. Showing up when everything is ready makes it a lot easier on me, and I bet on my mom too since she doesn’t have to sneer at all the shortcomings her very own daughter has in the kitchen.

“
Oh, Shel, use a small plate,” my mother whispers, taking my dinner plate from my hands, and replacing it with a salad-sized one. “You look like you’ve gained a few pounds.” I won’t admit she’s right to her face, but she probably is. I haven’t had time for my regular exercise routine since Matty.

“
Thanks for looking out for me, Mother,” I sneer. I take her miniature plate and start piling things on.

“
Hey, little sister,” Tyler says. “Looks like you can use this.” Thank God for my brother. What appears to be a plain Coke is actually spiked with rum. I can’t very well go walking around with a bottle of beer in my hand. What would the Stepford mother think? She’d probably faint at the sight.

“
Oh, dear God, Ty, I love you.” I take the drink from his hands and chug away, ignoring the burn in my throat and the bubbles exploding near my nose.

“
But I'm pissed at you.” I smack him in the arm.

“
What'd I do?” he shrieks.

“
You told dad about Matty,” I squeal.

Ty rubs his forehead, “He was worried about you so I told him someone was making you feel better these days. He says he's met him before and likes him.”

On the rare occasion I mixed family and friends for birthday parties or holidays, Matty had a chance to meet my easygoing dad and my overbearing mother.

“
I'm sorry. You still love me?” he asks, batting his lashes.

“
Yes,” I concede. I rarely get to see him, so I can't stay mad at him for long.

“
I know,” he says, giving me a brotherly squeeze. “How ya been? How are the kiddos treating you?”

“
They’re all right. I have a really good group this year,” I tell him. “You?”