A Hope Remembered (15 page)

The tart in her stomach tasted less sweet. How could she explain to Bess that she felt nothing but friendship for her son?

“I’d better get back. Thank you for watching the food, Bess.” Nora brushed her hands free of crumbs.

“My pleasure.”

Nora wandered through the assembled group back toward the shearers, saying hello and accepting compliments on behalf of Bess for the good food. She stopped next to Colin and Lyle. “What you do think?”

Lyle shook his head, his expression one of awe. “I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“I haven’t been to a shearing since I was a boy. I forgot how interesting it is to watch.” Colin looked from the sheep to her blouse and trousers, an appraising gleam in his dark eyes.

Nora’s face warmed and she quickly turned her attention to the spot where Jack and another of the shearers were conversing. “It can’t be as easy as they make it look, especially to cut off the entire fleece in one solid piece like that.”

“You’re probably right.” A determined glint entered Colin’s gaze. “But I’ve made up my mind I’d like to try.”

“In that suit?” She raised her eyebrows in challenge.

“This is my weeding suit, remember?”

Memories of that day in the garden flitted through Nora’s mind, adding to her feelings of contentment. “What did you tell your valet about where the dirt stains came from?”

“I told him I was ambushed,” Colin said with a sly smile, “by a whole regiment of weeds.”

Nora laughed. “I guess if you have a mind to try, go ask Mr. Snow if you can switch with one of the other shearers.”

“I believe I shall.” He marched over to where Mr. Snow stood talking with one of the other farmers.

“Is he really going to do it?” she asked Lyle. She’d liked Colin’s friend the instant she’d met him. Despite his injuries, he didn’t seem overly bitter, only a bit lost at times. Nora could relate.

The young man chuckled. “Colin Ashby never backs down from a challenge. He’ll do it or die trying.”

Mr. Snow announced the shearing would begin again and that Nathan Duncan and Colin Ashby would be replacing two of the earlier shearers. Jack Tuttle would stay.

An exclamation of surprise rose up from the crowd at the older man’s announcement. Nora noticed a number of the single young ladies from the village moving closer toward the benches, suddenly interested in the shearing when they hadn’t been before. She returned to her post near the holding pen. Colin had removed his jacket and rolled up his sleeves, giving her another glimpse at his muscled forearms. He took a seat on the bench closest to her.

At Mr. Snow’s call, she handed off the first ewe to Colin. The shearer whose place Colin had taken stood behind the bench, instructing him on how to shear the sheep. Shouts of encouragement rose from the nearby group—nearly all of them directed at Colin.

He worked slowly but meticulously. After a few minutes, he was well behind the other two shearers, but he didn’t stop. The cheers for him increased.
Come on, Mr. Ashby. That’s right, young man; put your back into it. You can do it, Ashby.
Nora found her attention riveted on him as well. His brow was furrowed in deep concentration, and beads of sweat soon formed there.

When the last of the wool dropped off the ewe, Colin straightened on the bench and shot the crowd a triumphant grin. The villagers cheered. He’d averaged only one ewe to two of Nathan’s and three of Jack’s. But the unadulterated joy on his face made him appear more the victor than either of the other two.

Nora couldn’t take her eyes off him. Not only did he look impressively handsome with his rumpled hair, light bearded jaw, and muscular arms, but she suddenly realized she was seeing the real Colin. Here was the man he so often hid behind his jokes and nonchalant attitude. He twisted on the seat to smile directly at her. Nora swallowed in panic. Her defenses were useless against the power of this Colin and his dashing smile.

The farmer next to her prodded her with his elbow. “He said he’s ready for another.”

“Oh…right.” Nora scrambled to give Colin a second ewe to shear.

His movements were quicker and more confident this time. He finished shearing this ewe in almost half the time the other had taken him. After that, he asked for one more. When he finished shearing that sheep, he announced he was finished and stood. The crowd swarmed him, clapping him on the back and offering their congratulations. The fuss interrupted Nathan’s and Jack’s progress. Nathan finished with the ewe in his hands, then wandered over to talk with Colin, but Jack hung back, a scowl on his face.

Nora’s conscience pricked at the sight of Jack sitting alone. She strode over to him. “I had no idea you could shear that fast.”

Jack didn’t spare her a glance; instead he kept his focus locked on the villagers surrounding Colin. “Looks as though it doesn’t matter, does it?”

“It’s only because they’ve never seen a baronet’s son shear a sheep before.”

“Why aren’t you over there?” he countered, finally looking at her. “I’d think you’d want to be the first to kiss your chap.”

Nora frowned. “He’s not my chap.”

“Isn’t he? I’ve seen the way you look at him.”

She refused to argue with him or let his bad mood spoil the lovely day. “Congratulations again, Jack. Thank you for helping with my sheep.” She turned and started to walk away.

“You don’t know him, not really,” Jack hurled at her back. “If you did, you wouldn’t be sticking up for him. Not if you knew what I do.”

Nora spun around, her hands balling into fists at her sides. At least Colin’s remarks about Jack weren’t malicious. “I shouldn’t have to remind you, you’re on my property, Jack. So I suggest you keep your opinions of Colin Ashby to yourself until you leave my farm.”

He had the courtesy to look apologetic. “I didn’t mean to make you angry, Nora. Honest. It’s just, that man is always…” He broke off when she held her hand up for him to stop. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

She forced a steadying breath to calm herself. “Apology accepted. You are still planning on saving me a dance tonight, right?” If she could get through it.

The anger left Jack’s expression and he nodded.

“Then I’ll see you tonight, Jack.”

She returned to the holding pen. There were at least twenty-five sheep left to shear before everyone would head home to get ready for the dance at the pub. Would Colin and Lyle attend? Nora hoped so, though she couldn’t free herself of the feeling that perhaps they ought to stay away. She hadn’t liked the animosity burning in Jack’s eyes just now.

M
usic from the fiddles spilled from the open pub door, inviting Nora to enter. Despite the slight drizzle, some of the farmers were drinking their pints outdoors. A few of them called out a greeting to her. While their acceptance warmed her through and through, it did little to calm the nerves in her stomach as she stared into the crowded pub.

It had been too many years since she’d last been to a dance, and never alone. Tom had always gone with her. The remembrance only added to the feeling inside her of being unable to move. She couldn’t enter or flee. If she did choose the former, would she be able to dance tonight without being plagued by memories?

Nora smoothed a hand over her waist, grateful she’d brought along more than one nice dress to England. She’d arranged her hair differently, too—half of it pulled back, while the other half fell long over her shoulders.

Another farmer exited the building, a mug in hand. “Evening, Miss Lewis.”

She nodded in response.

“Better get on in there if you plan to dance. All the good partners will be gone.” He chuckled.

Right.
She could do this. She could enjoy the evening, with the friends and villagers she now felt a part of.

Taking a deep breath, she walked through the door and into the pub. Half a dozen couples were dancing in the middle of the room. A small crowd watched and conversed along the perimeter. Nora squeezed through the throng, the music drawing her forward like a bee to honey. Her feet itched to tap out a beat to the vibrant melody pouring from the instruments of the two fiddlers. She caught sight of Lyle seated in the corner, talking with Mary Tuttle. If Lyle was here, then Colin must be, too.

She searched the faces around her, but to her surprise, Colin wasn’t standing along the walls. He was dancing and doing a fair job of it.

As if sensing her stare, he turned in her direction, and seeing her, he smiled. He looked very much as if he belonged here, just as he had earlier when he was shearing the sheep. Tom had possessed similar qualities, of being able to fit into any situation and putting people at ease with his ready smile.

For one brief second, she saw Tom instead of Colin. Any minute now she’d hear his voice call her name; she’d feel his hand clasp hers and pull her toward the dance floor. The memory felt so real she took a step toward him.

Someone jostled her from behind, jerking her from the past. Nora pushed out her breath. Tonight was about her life here, not the one she’d left behind.

The music ended and the dancers dispersed to find new partners. Where was Jack? She’d promised him a dance. Before she could locate him, though, Colin reached her side.

“Care to dance?”

“Yes, but I’m not sure how.” The steps she’d seen him doing weren’t like those she’d danced back home.

“Well, it’s about time I taught you something.” He held out his hand to her.

Nora hesitated, afraid to stir up the old memories again, then the notes of the next song filled the pub. She’d never been able to resist energetic music. “All right.” She placed her hand in his.

Colin led her to the middle of the room. There were more couples this time than Nora had seen dancing to the last song, but the crowd had thinned along the walls to accommodate them. With her hand firmly grasped in Colin’s, Nora followed his lead. The steps went perfectly with the tempo, and soon her anxiousness disappeared in the wake of newfound confidence. She’d never danced in such an animated way, but the music demanded it.

A rush of happiness engulfed her and she grinned at Colin. “This is nothing like dancing back in the States.”

“Forget those sedate waltzes or tangos,” he said near her ear so she could hear him. “Give me a good country dance any day.”

“You’re quite good at it.”

“And that surprises you?”

“I suppose I didn’t think to add dancing and sheep shearing to your list of talents.”

Colin laughed, full and genuine, the warm sound embracing Nora. It reminded her of the look on his face after he’d shorn his first sheep. The more she came to know him, the more he surprised her.

The moment the music ended, Jack appeared at her side to claim his dance. While he smiled at her, his demeanor radiated bitterness when he glanced at Colin. Without a word, Colin released her hand, bowed, and walked away. Nora watched, with a twinge of jealousy, as another young lady latched on to his arm and pulled him back toward the dance floor.

“I won fastest shearer again,” Jack boasted as the music started. “Fourth year. They announced it right before the dancing.”

“Congratulations, Jack. We’re all indebted to your quick shearing.”

His gaze latched on to someone over her head, probably Colin. “Nice to hear there are some who fancy my skills.”

Nora held her tongue—she didn’t want to incite another argument.

A minute or two into the song was long enough to prove dancing with Jack was nothing like dancing with Colin. Where Colin’s hand fit snuggly and warm against her waist, Jack’s gripped her a little too tightly. No easy conversation or friendly banter flowed between them either. Instead Jack remained morose unless he was looking at her. Only then did he act pleasant.

The song ended at last, to Nora’s relief, and she thanked Jack for the dance. To her chagrin, though, he kept her hand locked in his. Did he intend to dance with her again?

“Miss Lewis.” Lyle moved quickly toward her, despite having to use his cane. “May I have the next dance?”

Nora nearly kissed him. “I would be honored.”

Jack scowled at Colin’s friend, but he finally let go of her hand and stalked away.

Lyle leaned close to say, “I’m afraid I can’t dance these country jigs with this bum leg and cane, but you looked as though you needed a change in partners.”

“Yes, thank you.”

Lyle led her to a corner of the room, and while they didn’t dance, Nora enjoyed talking with him. He was a congenial young man, who loved music as much as she did. More than once he expressed his delight at hearing her and the choir sing in church the previous Sunday.

Long after the one dance had ended, she lingered by him, happy to continue discussing their favorite pieces of music. Occasionally Nora glanced toward the dancers as she and Lyle spoke. Colin was always there, a different girl on his arm each time. The spark in his dark eyes showed how much he enjoyed the dancing, while the young ladies’ starry gazes suggested they were more enamored with him than the festivities. Nora couldn’t blame them. When was the last time they’d danced with a handsome baronet-to-be?

Once she spotted Jack standing alone in the opposite corner. He was watching the dancing, too, his expression hard.

“You’ll have to come by and listen to my great-uncle’s gramophone,” she told Lyle at the end of their conversation. “It might be old, but the sound is still beautiful.” A warm hand clasped her elbow.

“What’s this? Lyle’s invited to listen to your musical contraption and I’m not?” Colin glowered at her. “I’m hurt, Nora.”

She pretended to ignore him as she smiled sweetly at Lyle. “What do you think? Should we allow a future baronet to our humble musical gathering? He probably has a whole room dedicated to music in that big house of his.”

“He sheared three sheep today,” Lyle pointed out, his face a mask of serious reflection.

“True.” Nora gave a thoughtful nod.

“And he does appear to be quite popular tonight because of it.”

“Good point.”

Colin growled deep in his throat. “Are you two finished?”

“Almost.” Nora turned toward him. “You’re welcome to come with Lyle, if…” His eyebrows shot up. “You agree to dance with me one more time.” It was her turn to dance again with her friend.

“I accept your terms.” He tucked her hand beneath his arm and pulled her close to his side. In a low voice, meant for her ears alone, he added, “It would be my great pleasure to dance with you, and only you, the rest of the evening, Nora.”

She couldn’t stop the blush that flooded her cheeks, but she couldn’t let him think he’d rattled her completely. “I doubt your many admirers would allow that,” she whispered back. “But I’ll accept two dances.”

“Very well.” He grinned and spun her onto the dance floor.

Nora laughed at his enthusiasm. If she didn’t know better, she might have suspected Colin of being a farmer, instead of the heir to a title and a wealthy estate.

The dance steps came easily to her this time. But whether that was because her country dancing had improved or because she had Colin as her partner, Nora couldn’t say. She had to admit she very much enjoyed dancing with him. Their movements were perfectly matched and she felt content, even proud, to be at his side. Almost as if they’d been dancing together for years.

Like me and Tom.

In an instant, the pub, the crowd, and the lively music receded. Memories replaced the present in her mind. Instead of being in England, she was back on the farm in Iowa, waltzing with Tom. The gentle strains of the piano spilled through the screen door.

“Are you scared?” Nora whispered. “To go fight?”

Tom lifted his shoulders in a shrug. “Naw.” A sheepish grin lit up his face a moment later. “All right. Maybe a little.”

Nora stopped dancing and squeezed his hand where it still held hers. “I’m scared, too.”

He cast a glance into the house where her mother sat playing the piano and her father read the newspaper. “Come here. There’s something I want to ask you.” He led her off the porch and to the oak tree across the road from the farmhouse. Nora rested her back against the rough wood, beside the heart Tom had carved there with their initials.

“You know I love you, Nora.” He peered down at her, his expression unusually serious. “Always have, always will. Which is why I think we ought to get married.”

Nora gave a startled laugh. Was he serious? It was hard to tell sometimes with Tom. “But you leave tomorrow.”

“Not before I go, but the moment I get back.” He cupped her cheek with his free hand. “I’d wake the preacher and do it now, but I don’t like the thought of possibly leaving you a widow.” He placed a finger over her lips when she started to protest such talk. “Not that I plan on doing anything else but returning to you. So what do you think?”

The answer came easily to her lips. After all, she’d wanted to marry Tom Campbell for years now—their families expected it as much as the two of them did. “Yes,” she said, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her cheek against his shirt. His steady heartbeat beneath her ear was a comforting sound. “The moment you get back, I’ll marry you.”

“I don’t have a ring to make the engagement official.” He eased back to see her face. “But if you’ll promise to be mine forever, that’s good enough for me.”

Be mine forever.

The noise of the dance and the pub rushed back into her conscious mind, and Nora stumbled. Colin, not Tom, held her hand now. His firm grip kept her from losing her balance, but they’d gotten off tempo.

“Are you all right?” he asked. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Almost.
“I think I could use some air. Do you mind?”

Colin shook his head. “Follow me.” He led her off the dance floor, through the crowd, and out the pub door.

Once outside, Nora gulped in a deep breath of the cool evening air. The light rain had stopped, though the sky was still littered with clouds.

“Where to, fair lady?” Colin hadn’t released her hand yet, for which she was grateful. She relished the human contact to chase away her recollections of the past.

She pointed to the low wall behind the pub. They walked over to it, and only then did he let her go. Tiny purple flowers dotted the stones. Nora plucked one, rubbing the soft petals between her fingers.

The girl Tom had left behind wasn’t the same as the one who stood here beside a stone fence in the middle of the Lake District. She’d loved and lost and grown up in the process. So why did she feel compelled to keep her promise to a man who could no longer honor his end of their agreement?

She didn’t have to search very deep to find the answer—it was fear. Fear of the pain and loss, if she were to fall in love a second time with someone who wouldn’t stay.

Companionable silence settled around her and Colin as they stared at the row of mountains on the opposite side of the lake. She appreciated that he was willing to let her think and that he didn’t feel an immediate need to disrupt the quiet.

She shifted her gaze to Colin’s profile. Ever since arriving in Larksbeck, she’d found him intriguing. That interest had soon given way to trust and friendship the more time she’d spent with him. His company made her quiet life more exciting and less isolated. She enjoyed their walks around the lake, when he regaled her with stories of his youth or his time in France. She appreciated the funny faces he shot her during choir rehearsal when Mr. Bagley was preoccupied. She liked the challenge of matching his banter and teasing with her own. He’d become her dearest friend in Larksbeck.

And something more?
her heart prompted.

Before today, she would have brushed the question aside, fearful of dishonoring the love she’d shared with Tom. Tonight, though, Nora allowed it to seep into her thoughts. The very act of looking toward the future instead of the past felt as freeing as the Iowa sky and as soothing as rain on a parched field.

As she continued to study the handsome contours of Colin’s face, a new question emerged.
What does he think of me?
Colin appreciated her friendship; that much she knew. Otherwise why would he choose to spend so much time with her? But did he see her as more than a friend? Seeds of hope, and fear, sprouted within her at the possibility.

At that moment, he turned to face her, causing Nora to glance away. Had he caught her staring? “You look rather serious.”

“I’m fine.”

A low chuckle emanated from him. Nora’s stomach fluttered at the sound. “Don’t worry. I won’t pry your secrets from you.” He reached out and fingered a lock of her hair. Even the whispered touch sent her heart racing. “I like your hair this way.”

Nora looked at him to gauge if he was joking or not, but he watched her solemnly. “Thank you.” His compliment pleased her, more than she probably ought to let it.