A Hope Remembered (24 page)

Colin exchanged his wet clothes for a dry set. The weather would make flying cold enough without his clothes being soaked through. He grabbed the rest of his flight gear and left his room. Lyle was waiting for him outside, beside the plane.

Colin climbed into the rear cockpit. He worked the magneto and throttle as Lyle spun the propeller. The engine coughed, then roared to life.

“Be careful,” Lyle yelled over the noise. He removed the wheel chocks and the biplane began to roll.

“I will,” Colin shouted back.

Less than a minute later, the plane was speeding across the grass toward the lake. Right before the beach, Colin pulled back on the stick and the nose of the biplane rose into the air. He guided the plane upward, then leveled her out. The bitterly cold, damp air pierced his flight jacket and the exposed parts of his face, but he ignored it. He circled the plane over the lake and the village, toward the mountains ringing the north end of the valley.

The rain had lightened considerably since he’d been on the fell, but the clouds still obscured his view until he cleared the mountains. Colin didn’t fear crashing into anything, though. He’d flown over these valleys and mountains so many times he no longer had to think about when to use the stick or the rudder petals. His hands and feet responded without conscious thought.

He circled the next valley, searching the ground as he banked, then headed back toward Larksbeck. The cloud cover meant he couldn’t fly low enough to get a good look at the mountains. Colin grit his teeth in frustration as the plane zoomed south of Elmthwaite. If the weather didn’t improve, he’d be forced to keep circling aimlessly until he ran out of fuel.

“Come on,” he hollered at the clouds. He hadn’t felt this helpless since the day Christian had been killed. What if something happened to Nora before he could explain? Before he had a chance to tell her he loved her?

His stomach roiled with anxiety, and unshed tears stung his eyes. What more could he do? He was only one man against the power of nature.

Where had he heard those words recently? He searched his memory. They were from the hymn he’d sung that first day at choir rehearsal with Nora—the hymn Christian loved. Colin whispered the rest of the verse, “
Yet in my dreams I’d be nearer, my God, to Thee.
” If there was ever a time he needed to be near God, it was now.

“God.” The address felt foreign in his mouth, but he plunged on. “I need Thy help. I need to find Nora, but I can’t see her with the clouds. I know You care for her, even more than I do…” His voice cracked with emotion. “Please don’t let me lose her now.”

Clearing his throat, Colin turned the plane in another wide, slow circle and flew back toward Larksbeck. A patch of green off the right wing caught his attention—it was one of the fell peaks. Could the clouds be lifting? Had God heard his awkward but humble prayer? Colin steeled himself against full hope, but he sensed a tiny seed of it still taking root inside him, despite his doubts.

He guided the plane north of Larksbeck, circled the valley there, and headed back. This time he spotted several splotches of green on either side of him. By the time he circled south and flew toward Elmthwaite again, the only clouds remaining were those gracing the very top of one peak. The rest had receded high above him.

Colin stared in awe at the uncovered mountains. A feeling of optimism filled his heart until he hardly noticed the sharp cold anymore. God was not only near him, but he felt certain He was near Nora, too. Colin wasn’t alone in his search for her.

“Thank you, Lord,” he murmured as he lowered the plane and leaned over the side to scrutinize the terrain below. Sheep ran helter-skelter at his approach. He spotted the villagers combing the mountainside. Nothing else looked out of place among the grass and rocks.

He flew away from the valley once more, searching the next. How far could Nora have gone? Colin guided the plane back toward Larksbeck, his gaze jumping from one side of the mountains to the other. In the basin between two of the peaks, a flash of color caught his eye. He circled back, his eyes pinned to that spot.

There it was again. A piece of blue near a large rock. He allowed himself a quick breath of relief at finding something and nosed the plane down as low as he dared to get a better look.

A figure lay prone against the rock. Colin recognized the blue dress as Nora’s. Horrified, he nearly forgot to pull up to keep the plane from crashing into the mountain. Questions raced through his mind as he and the biplane shot back into the sky. What had happened? How badly was she hurt?

Fear sprung up like vines inside him, snaking their way outward to tighten his lungs and constrict his breath. He wasn’t staring down at the grassy slopes of the fell anymore, but at Christian’s shattered plane and broken body, though he hadn’t seen them himself. Grief cut through him. He couldn’t lose another person he cared about.

What of the miracle you witnessed moments before?
his heart gently entreated.

Colin lowered his chin in shame. Why did he so easily doubt the help of Someone far greater than himself? He may have once believed God had abandoned him and his family when Christian took his last breath, but he could no longer cling stubbornly to that way of thinking. Not after what he’d seen and felt today.

For the first time, he viewed the last year of his life with different eyes. He had much to be grateful for, despite losing his brother. He still had family, health, and Nora’s friendship. God had brought her here, of that Colin felt certain. Loving her had reminded him that what he cherished most about life—love, laughter, acceptance, purpose—hadn’t been permanently ripped from him at Christian’s death.

Colin set his jaw—he wouldn’t give in to the panic. There had been nothing he could do to save Christian that fateful day, but he could do something to save Nora.

He flew in another circle and came in low over the other searchers. They lifted their heads as the biplane zoomed low overhead. When he neared the spot where he’d seen Nora, Colin moved the plane’s stick left to right to rock the wings. Once the villagers began rushing in the direction he’d indicated, he headed toward Elmthwaite Hall. The sooner he landed, the sooner he could go to Nora.

His petitions to Heaven started up again as he circumvented the lake and lowered the plane onto the lawn in back of the house.
Please let her be all right.
Please let us reach her in time.

Once the plane had stopped, Colin threw off his cap and goggles, tossed them into the front cockpit to retrieve later, and clambered to the ground. He didn’t bother with the wheel chocks. His long strides ate up the grass as he headed back up onto the fell. Every footstep, every heartbeat, echoed with uncertainty of what he might find on the fell, but the fear he’d felt earlier had lost its overwhelming grip. His faith, however fledging, had made him stronger.

Colin met the other rescuers halfway up the trail. Mr. Bagley held Nora in his arms, while the rest of the group followed single-file behind him. The somberness of the villagers hit Colin from several yards away. The closer he came, the more details came into focus—Nora’s limp body, her mud-strewn clothes and face, her matted hair.

“Is she…” Colin couldn’t finish. He took a deep breath, bracing himself for the worst.

“She’s breathing,” Mr. Bagley said. Relief nearly drove Colin to his knees in the wet grass. “It looks like she took a nasty hit to the head. I think she might have slipped. We’ve got to get her warm and out of this weather.”

Colin removed his mostly dry jacket and draped it over Nora as Mr. Bagley passed by him. He wished he were the one holding Nora tight to his chest, but he appreciated the others’ willingness to help. Bess gave his hand a squeeze of gratitude as she and Jack walked past. Jack still appeared to be in shock. Colin fell into step at the back of the group. They moved in a slow line back down the mountain.

When they reached Nora’s cottage, Mr. Bagley carried her inside and upstairs. Bess began issuing orders for hot water to be boiled, for Dr. Chutney to be sent for, and for Jack to go tell the rest of her children that Nora had been found. Colin stood in the parlor, hands in his pockets, feeling in the way and useless. He could have been the one to go for the doctor, but he was glad someone else volunteered. He wanted to stay near Nora.

The doctor arrived soon after and hurried up the stairs. Colin paced between the parlor and the dining room, ignoring the small crowd that milled about and their conjectures on Nora’s condition. He saw Bess come down once and fetch water from the kitchen, but she returned to the second floor without a word to anyone. Eventually the group dispersed as the villagers slipped away to their own homes.

When they’d all gone, Colin summoned his courage to venture upstairs. Would he be allowed to see Nora when no one else had? The door to her room stood ajar. The murmur of quiet conversation floated into the hallway.

Colin gave the door a soft tap. Bess appeared in the doorway. “Mr. Ashby?” she said with evident surprise. “I thought you might have left with the others.”

“Not yet.”

Her face relaxed into a smile. “Thank you again for your help today. We might never have found her if you hadn’t gone up in your aeroplane.”

“May I see her?”

She looked him up and down a moment, then nodded. Opening the door wider, she gave Colin a view of the room. Nora lay in her bed with blankets up to her neck. She’d been cleaned up, all traces of mud erased from her face and hair. Her eyes were still shut, but her chest rose and fell with the even breaths of sleep. Dr. Chutney was putting his tools into his black bag.

“You located her just in time, Mr. Ashby,” the doctor said, straightening. “Any longer in this weather and her hypothermia might have been much worse.”

“Will she be all right?” Colin looked the man square in the eye—he wanted the truth, however painful it might be to hear.

Dr. Chutney glanced at Nora and back to Colin. “With plenty of rest and warmth, I believe she’ll be fine. She likely suffered a concussion when she hit her head, so she will need to be watched carefully for any signs of complication. But I don’t think she’ll suffer any lasting consequences from the ordeal.”

Once again relief flooded Colin, bringing hope in its wake. Nora would be all right. As he studied her peaceful expression, a longing to touch those lips and reddened cheeks nearly drove him across the room to kneel at her bedside. If only he could be the one to stay with her, sit near her, tell her everything the moment she awakened, but he doubted Bess would allow it.

“May I come by tomorrow?” he asked instead. “To see how she’s doing?”

“I can’t say she’ll be up to having visitors,” the doctor said in a kind tone, “but you’re welcome to stop by. If that’s all right with you, Auntie Bess.”

“Course.” Bess settled into the hardback chair pulled up near the bed. “Will you let my Mary know what’s happened, Mr. Ashby? And that I’ll be staying here for the time being? She can swing by on her way home.”

Colin nodded. “I’ll let her know.”

With nothing more to say or do, Colin bade the two of them good-bye and let himself out the front door. The rain had stopped, and a shaft of sunlight shone down onto the lake. The sight bolstered the feeling of optimism stirring inside him. He’d been led to find Nora—of that he had no doubt.

What would she say when he told her how he’d prayed and how the clouds had parted for him? The thought brought a trace of a smile to Colin’s face, the first he’d felt all day.

Tomorrow he’d tell her about the miracle in finding her and how much he loved her. Tomorrow everything could return to the way it had been.

S
omething warm and wet lapped at Nora’s chin. Curious, despite the ache in her head, she cracked her eyelids open. A wriggly ball of brown fur stood with its hind paws on her chest.

“Phoebe,” she croaked out. “You’re back.”

The dog continued to lick her face as Nora lifted her hand and scratched Phoebe’s ears.

“Jack found her last night and brought her home straightaway.” Bess was seated next to the bed, a bit of mending in her hands. “Good to see you awake, love.”

“How long have I been asleep?”

“Since yesterday midmorning. It’s going on eight o’clock now. Looks as though it’ll be a sunny day.”

Nora settled Phoebe at her side and glanced at the window. Beams of sunlight streamed through the curtains into the room. The sight warmed her nearly as effectively as the extra blankets.

“How did I get home?”

“We found you on the fell. It looked as though you slid down the trail, then hit your head on a rock.” Bess cut a thread with her teeth. “Though that rock stopped you from ending up all the way at the bottom.”

Nora gingerly touched her head. She remembered searching for Phoebe on the fell and being very wet and cold. There was also a vague recollection of traversing some stairs before she felt herself sliding. After that, all she could remember was the feeling of being lifted into the air and the rise and fall of voices around her. She’d been too tired, her head too full of pain, to pay much attention or respond.

“Dr. Chutney will be along soon. He believes you should be up and around in a few days, mind you stay in bed and rest.” Bess motioned to the tray on the bedside table. “Care for something to eat?”

The poached egg, toast, and steaming tea made Nora’s mouth water. She couldn’t even remember the last thing she’d eaten. “Yes, please.”

Bess helped her sit up, with the pillow propped behind her. A wave of dizziness engulfed Nora, but she shut her eyes against it and the feeling soon dissipated. After Bess settled the tray on her lap, Nora sipped at the tea. The hot liquid felt heavenly sliding down her dry throat and warming up her insides. She still felt chilled.

“Where did Jack find Phoebe?” Nora asked, her hand brushing the dog’s fur. Phoebe lifted her head at hearing her name, then lay back down. Nora smiled at her—she’d been so worried she’d never see the puppy again.

“Somewhere on the fell, I suppose. He was very upset at seeing you hurt.” Bess cleared her throat. “We all were. Half the village turned out to look for you.”

Gratitude mingled with remorse inside Nora at Bess’s words. “I’m sorry to have worried everyone. I probably shouldn’t have gone up the fell alone, but I had to try to find to Phoebe.” A memory nibbled at the back of her mind—some event that had transpired before she’d gone looking for her dog—but Nora sensed it was unpleasant and she drove it from her thoughts.

Bess’s serious expression perked up into a smile. “How’s your head feeling?”

“Sore. But other than feeling cold, I’m all right.”

With a scrape of the chair, Bess stood and gathered another blanket from the foot of the bed. She draped it around Nora’s shoulders. Nora snuggled into the warmth. “Better?”

Nora nodded. “You don’t have to stay here. Your family needs you more than me.”

Bess shook her head as she sat back down. “You are family. And my young’uns will be fine until you’re fully better.”

The feeling of appreciation expanded in Nora’s heart. She and Phoebe weren’t alone. She needed to remember she had family here. “As soon as I’m well, I’ll have to thank everyone who helped.”

“You can start with Mr. Ashby. He said he’d be along today to see how you’re faring.”

Nora set her cup onto the tray with a loud
clink
, drawing an odd look from Bess. Memories fired through her mind like gunshots—Sir Edward’s visit, his request to buy her land and farm for a hotel, Nora’s discovery that Colin had known about the plan from the beginning. “Wh-why does he want to stop by?”

“He was the one who discovered you were missing in the first place, love. Found you on the fell, he did, using that aeroplane of his. Without him, I don’t know that we would’ve found you until it was too late.”

Colin had saved her life? The realization was as unsettling as the thought of seeing him. He didn’t want her; he only wanted her land. If she’d died out on the fell, it would’ve made things much easier for the Ashbys.

Nora frowned at her own dark thought. Colin might have broken her trust and her heart, but he wasn’t a fiend. That didn’t mean she had anything she wished to say to him, though. In a few more days she’d have to give Sir Edward her answer about the farm, and she would make that decision without succumbing to the charms of Colin Ashby ever again.

“Please tell him I’m fine, but that I don’t wish to see him.”

Bess gave an absent nod. “That’s all right if you’re not up to him visiting today.”

“Today or any other day.” Nora kept her chin up, even while her heart and dreams split further at saying the words out loud.

“I see.” Bess shot her a veiled look before she resumed her sewing. “Something happen between you two?” Her tone sounded causal enough, though the question certainly wasn’t. “My Mary’s talked about seeing you and Mr. Ashby together quite often.”

Nora slid her tray back on the bedside table, her appetite gone. She slipped down onto her pillow. How much should she reveal? She considered telling Bess about the acts of vandalism to her property, but she decided against it. She didn’t have actual proof that Colin had stooped to such tricks, though she had no reason to doubt his involvement now. It was humiliating enough to have to admit she’d fallen for the man’s lies.

“We did spend a lot of time together.” She feigned intense interest in the hem of one of the blankets. “But I learned yesterday his interest was an act.”

“How do you mean?” Bess didn’t sound convinced.

Nora cringed as she recalled her conversation with Colin’s father. “Sir Edward wants to buy my land, to build a hotel and bring in more income for Elmthwaite Hall. Apparently Colin—Mr. Ashby—knew this from the start and was charged to persuade me to sell.”

Bess’s mouth fell open. “Buy your land? But you’ve only just come home. What did you tell the man?”

“I told him I’d think about it and give him an answer in a week.”

“What for, love? How come you didn’t send the baronet packing with a ‘no’?” She studied Nora’s face with such intensity Nora lowered her gaze. “Ah. You still care for Mr. Ashby.”

“Yes.” Tears swam in Nora’s eyes. “I mean, no. How can I? I was wrong about him.”

She waited for Bess to speak, to get as angry as she felt over the whole mess. Instead the older woman gave a sad shake of her head. “You have every right to be upset with him. But…”

“But?” Nora repeated, her frustration making her tone sharp.

“If you’d seen him yesterday.” Bess stared down at the sewing in her lap. “The look on his face when he told me you were missing, and then again, when he found us carrying you back.”

Despite her best efforts, a flicker of hope attempted to ignite inside Nora. She pressed her lips against it. She wouldn’t be fooled again. “He was probably worried if something happened to me, my land would go to you and your children and he’d never get it.”

Bess met her eye. “I think your land was the farthest thing from his mind.”

Nora pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders. Bess didn’t understand. Nora had allowed herself to love again, only to learn it wasn’t real.

Her head began to hurt. She twisted onto her side to face Phoebe and drew the other covers up to her neck. Only with her back to Bess did she allow the tears to come. “I’d like to sleep now. Please tell him that I don’t wish to see him.”

After knocking on Nora’s front door, Colin stepped back and waited for Bess to answer. He eased his grip on the bundle of flowers in his hand. Hopefully Nora would like them. He’d picked them from one of the Elmthwaite gardens this morning.

He knocked again, knowing the sound needed to carry all the way upstairs. After another minute or so, Bess opened the door. Colin noticed her usual animated demeanor had been replaced by a somber one. Had Nora’s condition worsened in the night?

“Good morning, Bess.”

She dipped her head in acknowledgment.

“Is Nora worse today?”

“No, thank the Lord. She woke up about an hour ago and drank a little something. She’s tired and says her head still hurts, but she seems to be improving.”

Relieved, Colin smiled and hoisted his flowers. “May I see her? I won’t stay long, I promise.”

Bess shifted her gaze to the floor. “I’m afraid that’s not possible, Mr. Ashby.”

“Is she sleeping? I can come by later.”

The older woman shook her head. “Isn’t that.” She lifted her chin. “She won’t agree to see you—today or any day. I’m sorry.”

Nora refused to see him? Colin fell back a step and lowered the flowers to his side. He’d expected anger, even distrust. But he hadn’t counted on Nora not even giving him a chance to explain—to tell her he wasn’t the man his father had portrayed him to be.

“It’s about her land, isn’t it?” he asked, though he knew the answer.

“Yes.”

“Can’t I have five minutes, to tell her the truth? Please, Bess.”

“I can’t be going against her wishes. I’m sorry,” she repeated, her voice nearly as sorrowful as his own. Why hadn’t she condemned him, too? After all, it was his father who wanted to throw out her relative.

As if she’d heard his unspoken question, Bess threw a glance over her shoulder and leaned forward. “I want to thank you again for saving her life, even if she won’t. Whether for her or her land, that was a brave thing you done. I only wish it could’ve made things right between you. Good-bye, Mr. Ashby.”

The finality of her farewell wasn’t lost on Colin as Bess quietly shut the door. She might not convict him completely, as Nora had, but she wouldn’t choose him over a relation either. Colin stared at the flowers in his hand; he’d forgotten to give them to Bess. Their cheery heads mocked the pain squeezing his lungs.

He tossed them at the stone wall of the cottage and watched them fall to the ground, crushed and battered. Just like his hopes for the future—ones that had included Nora, until yesterday.

With his hands jammed into his pockets, he walked down the lane. Regret and anger warred inside him. If only she’d given him a chance…But he didn’t blame her for not wanting to either. He’d broken her trust, from the moment he’d agreed to his father’s plan. Someone like Nora, who’d already lost so much, wasn’t likely to trust again where she’d found deceit. And yet his feelings for her had been—still were—genuine. In that he’d never lied.

Could he avoid seeing her, once she was well? As his father and Eleanor had clearly avoided each other. Perhaps. But even without seeing her, Colin knew it would be a long time—the rest of his life maybe—before he would be able to forget Nora.

The walk home succeeded in driving away most of his hurt and frustration, leaving only numbness. Colin entered the house and stopped in the entryway. What should he do now? He’d spent nearly every day for the past three months in Nora’s company.

“Colin!”

He looked up to see Lady Sophia sweeping her way down the stairs.

“I’ve been looking for you.”

“Have you?” He suddenly felt too exhausted to play her games.

“Will you take me for a ride in your aeroplane?” She came to stand beside him, her hand moving possessively to his sleeve. “Father’s given his approval and it’s a gorgeous day.”

Was it? Colin hadn’t even noticed the lack of cloud cover or rain. He glanced out the door, which he’d mistakenly left open. Sure enough, sunshine shone down on the gravel drive outside.

“You look as though you need cheering up, and I know how much you love to fly.”

Colin studied her hazel eyes, which appeared to be largely free of pretense today. He didn’t particularly like Lady Sophia—he’d witnessed more than his fair share of her shallow, petty opinions during her two visits. But flying was exactly what he needed today. With her aboard the plane, he might actually be able to forget Nora and her refusal to see him, at least for a few minutes.

“You’ve convinced me,” he said, forcing an exaggerated smile. It felt unfamiliar to his mouth. For weeks now, he’d been himself—the real Colin Ashby—because of Nora. And though she might not want him anymore, he didn’t have to go back to living behind his pretentious façade again. That, at least, was something he could keep from his time with her.

He let the fake smile fall away. “You are correct, Lady Sophia. I’m very much in need of a good, long flight. And you are welcome to join me.”

Bess opened Nora’s door and stepped inside. “You’ve a visitor.”

Had Colin tried to come by again, as he had yesterday? Nora’s heart beat faster at the thought. “Who is it?” she asked.

“Mr. Lyle.”

Nora blew out her breath in relief and sat up straighter against the pillows. She hadn’t seen Lyle since the party at Elmthwaite Hall. “I’d love to see him.”

Bess nodded before disappearing out the door. A few moments later, Nora heard the methodical thud of Lyle’s cane and footsteps against the stairs. When he reached her doorway, he paused and rapped a knuckle against the wood. “May I come in?”

“Yes, please.” She motioned to the chair drawn up near the bed.

He crossed the room and sat down, resting his cane across his lap. “You’re looking quite well.”

Nora laughed as she fingered her loose braid. Except for the occasional dizzy spell, she was feeling much better, though the doctor still insisted she rest as much as possible. “That’s what visitors are supposed to say.”

“Yes, but it’s especially true in your case, Nora.”

She blushed at his compliment. If only she hadn’t given her heart foolishly to Colin, perhaps she and Lyle might have been more than friends. As it was, she was finished with romantic attachments. “Thank you. What have you been occupying your time with?”

“Automobiles,” he said with a grin. “Sir Edward had four sent up from London. Fascinating machinery.”