A Captivating Conundrum (36 page)

"Nope." 

His hands grasped my arms and I could feel the strength flow through him. "I. Am. Not. Done."

I studied that face. Every twitch, every movement…he looked dangerous when he licked his lips—the skilled duo that'd already caused me to explode over and over again. "Do you trust me?"

His brow furrowed. "What?"

"Do you trust me?"

The corner of his mouth pulled up, allowing the adorable chin dimple to appear. "In theory," he replied.

I slapped his chest and reached over to the nightstand, trying to ignore the huge moan he let out beneath me. Grabbing a pair of panties from the drawer I sat back, feeling the hard weight of him press into my thigh. "Sit up?"

"Gladly." Matt said, as he started to flip me back over.

"Put your hands behind you."

"What?"

"You're so worried about touching me…this will take away the problem."

Matt shook his head. "No. I need to touch you, Beth."

"Just for a minute? Please?" I leaned in, whispering in his ear as my tongue stroked the sensitive skin of his neck. "I want to touch you…and this is obviously the only way you'll let me."

~ His ~

My heart practically beat out of my chest when she whispered those words. I wanted to please her. I wanted to give Beth everything…but not being able to touch the woman I craved more than air made my mind scream at me to take over and steal the breath from her lungs.

Closing my eyes, taking a deep breath, I clasped my hands behind my back and felt Beth's soft hands and the silky fabric put me out of play. I swallowed hard. Beth was more than I ever thought any woman could be.

As she pressed her hand against my chest, pushing me back into the pillows, I watched the luscious lips begin their magic. Caressing, kissing my chest, Beth immediately caused the tingles to appear in every inch of my body. Moving slowly Belt tasted, touched—made sure that she put me through the same torture I had given to her. But this was far worse.

Beth's movements were gentle, calm, and the combination of the silky, wet skin and the perfect hard nipples moving over my ribs made me want to scream. The first hand appeared and Beth began to stroke me, priming me for that stunning mouth that was only inches away, licking the inside of my thigh. Her tongue was exquisite; warm, wet and smooth. And her breathing—the short breaths she exuded as she moaned her excitement brought me to another place. It was already too much.

She kept whispering my name, and with each whisper Beth sent a small cool breeze over my cock making it tighten even more, as I waited for the feel of that mouth with an anticipation that no human being has ever felt before.

I struggled with the ties on my wrists; I pulled at the satin creation but I couldn't budge the knot. It was as if she'd used handcuffs to make sure I would suffer.

The hand appeared on my chest and I heard that deep purr, "Relax." 

The growl that came from my throat was something I'd never heard before. "I need to touch you."

"I want to taste." 

It was as if I was suddenly drowning when I watched that beautiful mouth open. Her lips parted and she took me in, stroking, licking, fondling; her fingers caressed while she sucked me in and out of her mouth, pulling me over the edge. I couldn't breathe. All I could do was scream her name as I felt her drink every bit of me.

She had to be a dream, a fantasy that only exists in the mind, because the beauty, grace and heat that she focused on me was unbearable and completely unreal.

The fondling began again, as the tongue flicked back and forth. I moaned, "Beth, no man can go again that fast." My body betrayed me in seconds. Everything I owned was letting me know that, with her, I could do anything she wanted me to do.

The trip to paradise began again, and just when I reached the pinnacle and threw myself into an abyss that felt more amazing than anything else in this world ever could, Beth's hands and mouth would go back to work, bringing me to the top of the world so many times that I felt like I was literally flying.

~ Hers ~
   

 I don't know how long I sat there…how long I studied that incredible face. You know guys always use the word 'beautiful,' but this man actually was. 

When I discovered Matt had fainted, or perhaps just ridden off on his own cloud for a while, I ran for the glass of water. Switching on the light, I grabbed for my robe and tied it around me, a bit scared now that anyone could just walk into my inner sanctum if they tried.

When I came back and sat on the bed, I covered his magnificence with the sheet. I wanted to make sure that Matt wasn't unveiled to any unexpected visitor's eye, as I just sat and stared at him.

The brown curls were so thick; the ears were perfect on either side of the strong, rugged jaw; and those beautiful long lashes that I knew were protecting the most wondrous eyes I'd ever seen, were amazing to covet. The stubble outline where his mustache and beard would grow if left too long to the natural world was pronounced, as if a shadow had been added to make him look even more dangerous when he stared into my eyes with that total look of lust and passion.

The chest was still my favorite; the muscles that held me, pulled me, pressed me against him—there was a large part of me that simply wanted to lay down, rest my head on that perfect, protective mass and fall asleep. With Matt beneath me I would be assured a night of bliss, where I felt safe and warm as if nothing in the world could ever seep under the door to disturb us.

Matt brought peace to the room, the house, my heart—and he would never know the feeling of that. Even with my writing I could never put into words the love—no, that wasn't enough—the complete beauty he gave me that made my soul actually want to join with another. Matt made me want to soar, to grow wings like some of my characters and simply ride the wind as long as he was beside me to catch me if I fell.

This was suddenly
our
sanctum. I leaned forward and placed a kiss on his strong chin as those lashes fluttered and he came back to me. 

His eyes were glazed a bit as he took a moment to see my face and smile. He raised his hands, freed from the satin bond. "What happened?"

I handed him the glass of water, all of a sudden completely unsure of how to speak to a fantasy.

He placed a hand over his eyes and moaned. "I passed out?"

I nodded.

He took my hand. "So much for the stud label." 

"I thought it was adorable."

Matt chuckled. "Yeah, sure. The old—he came and he went joke." A blush appeared in his cheeks.

"Just drink the water. You've had a long day and I don't think you ate anything since breakfast."

His gaze grew warm. "I ate exactly what I wanted to." Flicking the tie on my robe, he continued, "And you might as well ditch this because you won't be getting out of here for a while."

I smiled. "There's a granola bar on the table next to you."

He laughed, grabbing the snack and turning back to me. "Except for the Italian dinner you chowed down to keep from answering my questions, I've never seen you eat anything but fruit."

 I shrugged. "What can I say? I'm used to caffeine and fruit. Of course I, like a good girl, drink a ton of water."

Matt drank down the glass. "Do you want to tell me how a woman whose last and only lover was over a decade ago knows how to do what you just did?" 

"You forget," I said, with a smile. "I am a huge proponent of education."

"Damn," Matt said, swallowing the snack. "What kind of books does the New York Public Library give out? Do they have classes?"

I slapped his chest and dropped my gaze, suddenly feeling a tad bit guilty. "I really am sorry. I didn't mean to overstep anything. I just wanted to see."

I looked back into a face of pure confusion. His eyes were wide as he let out a laugh. "You're
sorry
? If you didn't notice, or if the library books skipped the ending, you should know that I not only enjoyed myself, beautiful, but it was the best night of my entire life."

Without warning, Matt took me by the waist and placed me down on his lap, spreading my legs on each side of him in the process. As my robe fell open and his hand began to take up residence, he smiled with his eyes. "There are no boundaries with us." With his other hand Matt reached for the panties that were once his manacles. "Although, payback can be a real bitch." 

Slowly his warm fingers entered me and my breath caught, as the feeling of ecstasy returned.

~***~

The knocking on the door made me jump from his lap as Bobby's voice came from the other side.

"Um, Beth? You know I would never do this, but…"

I tried to calm my breathing as I watched Matt's eyes begin to roll.

"Beth…it's Jerry."

My heart constricted in my chest. "What?" My voice was barely a whisper.

"The hospital called. He had a heart attack."

Matt's face completely changed as he nodded at me and jumped from the bed, throwing on his clothes as he went around the room. "I'll get the car." 

Twenty-Eight

~ Hers ~

Matt drove very fast for a man who didn't live here—a man that had no concept of the lay of the land. 

All I tried to focus on was breathing in and out, attempting to calm my racing heartbeat while begging whoever might be listening to save the extraordinary man that Death now had in his clutches.

I felt Matt's hand on my knee and heard his soft words in my ear, as Bobby and Chris spoke from the backseat. I was surrounded by love—by friends—and I was suddenly truly grateful that I wasn't alone this night; this one night that was already crushing me and I hadn't even seen Jerry yet.

As we pulled up in front of the emergency room it all came back…

My mother crying, my Dad lying lifeless on a gurney as they raced to hook him up to every contraption known to the medical world in order to get his heart restarted and bring him back to life…

But this time I just stood in the glow of that god-awful red neon light and took a deep breath, as Matt's hand stroked my back, his whispers of support continuing in my ear.

I walked through the doors, hearing the metallic 'whoosh' that always reminded me of the jaws of death, and was immediately assaulted by the worst smell known to mankind. You never forget it. This scent is the only one related to life
and
death. Isn't that odd? The life of a child coming into the world, and the lives of many headed out far too soon, are all entrenched in that hideous smell.

Blake, the owner of the bar, was staring at me as other friends sat in the uncomfortable blue chairs scattered around the waiting room. Some had tears, some had hope, and some were just staring off into space as if wondering when it would be them on the other side of the door while their friends held vigil.

I nodded at everyone. It's all I could do. I really had absolutely no idea what to say as I looked at the ER doors. They were closed; the big red bar was set in place so that no one could get in and disturb the people who were struggling just to wake up and walk back through them to freedom.

Matt's supportive hand on my back felt almost like a life preserver. He was guiding me, balancing me, as the world whipped around my head and brought me back years to when I had to sit and stare at my father…