A Bit of Me (16 page)

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A BIT OF ME

Bailey Bradford

97

Apparently Billy had seen Randy and Paulie fucking in the club before, and Randy had compared the two men’s techniques when he’d shoved Billy down to suck cock in Xavier’s office.

Hearing about Billy’s abuse at Randy’s hands had smothered the resentment Chase felt towards the bouncy blond. It had shocked him to realise not all of that resentment was because Billy was close to Xavier. There was a part of Chase that longed to be free and comfortable enough to laugh and smile and just enjoy life like Billy did.

Instead, Chase knew he was a bitter, angry man, and a dangerous one in certain

situations. He’d never be like Billy, but wouldn’t it be something if he could just…learn how to not be so…so like he was?

“Not gonna happen,” Chase muttered as he gave himself one last look. His hair was

tousled in a way that screamed JBF—just been fucked—and exhaustion gave his eyes a

heavy-lidded look that only added to that perception. He’d draw his share of attention tonight, although he’d also blend in with many of the other men at The Xxchange. He

absolutely was
not
trying to primp for the damned owner.

Chase wasn’t even interested in going to the club, exactly. It was just that it was

Xavier’s first night back, and everyone else was going—including Max and Bo, which could be amusing because Chase figured Max would spend the entire time blushing fiercely. But Chase doubted he’d be paying attention to the man. He would be looking for Paulie—that was the whole reason Chase was going. It had absolutely nothing to do with the man who’d haunted him at night, chasing away what bits of sleep Chase had tried to grasp. The lack of sleep had made the physical therapy session today more hellish than usual, which left Chase tired, sore, and well past cranky.

And wearing a goddamned pink belt with a godawful buckle. Jesus.
A knock on the door put an end to his brooding. “Come in,” he hollered, unsurprised when Josh strolled in before he’d even finished calling out.

Josh eyed him and licked his lips, leering so exaggeratedly Chase almost smiled.

Almost—but not quite, since Josh was wearing a very nice black and pearl inlaid belt buckle.

And maybe it was laid out in such a way as to form a penguin, too, but it wasn’t fucking hot pink and decorated with dancing penguins.

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“You look really hot, man, especially when you glare. Some guys can’t pull it off, but you definitely are rockin’ the whole deadly dude look,” Josh babbled, grinning at Chase.

“And those clothes are tight enough to show off your hot little ass,” he added as he patted Chase’s butt.

Chase glared so hard his eyes crossed, but in truth he felt a little flattered. Josh was a good looking man, and so effervescent it wasn’t possible to stay mad at him for more than a second or two.

Josh stepped back and cocked a hip, planting one hand on it. Chase checked the man

out as thoroughly as Josh was checking him. With his dark hair gelled and spiked and his green eyes rimmed in a thin line of blue, Josh was simply devastating. Slashed tee, splattered with various bright colours, exposing hints of nipples and ridges of firm belly; faded jeans so tight they made Chase’s balls ache in sympathy. Chase twirled his finger and Josh complied, shaking his pert ass when he turned away.

A noise at the doorway had Chase and Josh both looking over there. Nick stood with

his arms crossed over his chest and one eyebrow arched as he watched them. Chase opened his mouth up to explain it’d only been turnabout, as Josh had ogled his ass first, but then he really saw Nick and snapped his mouth shut.

The cowboy was dressed in head to toe leather, a deep burgundy colour that fitted him like a second skin. Pants, boots, vest, cap…and a couple of leather bands around his biceps. It should have been too much or boring or something, but Nick pulled it off and made it work.

“You should probably give Chase a break and swap belts with him like you intended

to,” Nick rumbled.

Chase looked for any sign of anger, but Nick was giving Josh a sappy grin and—

“We’re changing belts?” Chase asked, cringing at the relief in his voice.

Josh laughed and began unbuckling his belt. “Yeah, I really love that belt, it’s my

favourite—that’s why I lent it to you. It kind of occurred to me after that—just because I love it doesn’t mean you would, so if you want to swap—”

“Yeah. Thanks.” Chase had the belt off and was trading with Josh in seconds. “So,

what’s the plan? Everyone’s going to be watching out for that Paulie guy, and keeping an eye on Xavier, too, right?”

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Josh and Nick looked at each other for a few seconds before Nick spoke. “Ostensibly, we’re going to celebrate Xavier’s first night back.”

Chase snorted as he slid the other belt through the loops. Yeah, he knew how these

guys were. Protective and caring to the point of smothering someone with it, although they’d got a lot better at giving Chase his space. Now it looked like Xavier was going to be the recipient of the same…nurturing Chase received.

And Chase was going to be in on it, even if it seemed a little hypocritical to him. He could tell himself he was only going to look for Paulie, but Chase doubted he’d be able to resist seeking Xavier out alone. The man had started a fire burning in Chase, one that seemed to scorch beneath his skin, and Chase meant to put that fire out tonight.

His first night back officially sucked. Then again, the entire day had sucked. He’d been so relieved when Randy had agreed, finally, to see him, but the outcome of that short chat had crushed a part of Xavier’s hope that he and Randy would ever reconcile. He closed his eyes and rubbed at them as he replayed the morning’s events.

As he had over a dozen times before, Xavier had asked to speak to Randy. Expecting

another refusal, he’d almost thought it was some sort of joke when the guard had said Randy would see him. The guard seemed shocked, too, but after checking Xavier over and making him leave anything that could be considered dangerous with another guard, Xavier had finally been led to the visiting area.

When Randy walked through the swinging doors, his hands shackled behind him and a

stern-looking guard on his heels, Xavier’s heart had all but stopped. Randy had lost so much weight he looked skeletal, but even through the glass partition he could see that Randy’s eyes were clear and his attention sharp, even if he was looking at Xavier as if he were the sludge at the bottom of a sewage drain.

“Randy,” Xavier had begun when his brother had sat down across from him. The

partition had seemed to put more distance between them than there really was, or maybe it had been the hatred in Randy’s eyes. “I’m so glad—”

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“Shut up,” Randy had snarled, stunning Xavier with the anger that laced those two

words. “There’s nothing you have to say that I want to hear. I’m fucking tired of you begging to see me when you never had time before. Everything was Billy, Billy, Billy, like that fucking little street whore was your brother instead of me. So fuck you, Xavier. I ain’t your brother anymore.”

Xavier had wanted to break the partition between them and shake Randy until he

stopped talking bullshit. He’d always tried to be close to his brother, but even before Billy came along, Randy had been too busy blowing through his inheritance to spare Xavier any time. Then, once he was broke, Randy had started hanging around the club, but even then he hardly ever spoke to Xavier unless it was to insult him or ask for money.

But Xavier didn’t say any of that, because he’d tried before and those were the other times he and Randy had come to blows. In Randy’s world, everything was Xavier’s fault.

“Here’s the deal,” Randy had growled, narrowing his eyes as he glared at Xavier. “I

fucked up with attacking that guard. One of the other guys had told me he could score me some meth and my request didn’t go over so well. I panicked or whatever, and now I’m looking at even more time. I’m gonna plead guilty and get a shorter sentence no matter what my fucking attorney says. And I don’t ever want you to come visit me again.” He leaned closer until his forehead almost touched the partition. The guard surged forward and snapped out a demand for Randy to sit back. “Don’t fucking bother me anymore. Go away and stay away, asshole.”

Randy had sat back then, smiling triumphantly while Xavier felt like his chest had been split open with a dull knife. “You hate me that much?” he’d asked, barely able to raise his voice enough to be heard.

“Fuck yeah,” Randy had answered, then he’d stood up and left Xavier sitting there.

Xavier was still reeling from the encounter hours later, but he refused to spend the evening in his office, even if that was what he usually did. Somehow now it seemed like hiding, something he absolutely wouldn’t do. He didn’t want anyone thinking he was afraid to be in his own club.

Granted, the office gave him the heebie-jeebies now, but he’d get over that. He’d come in early and sequestered himself in the room for a couple of hours. The rather spectacular www.total-e-bound.com

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argument he’d had with Billy over that, and over replacing his chair—which hadn’t

happened, much to Billy’s disgust—had only made Xavier more determined to deal with

what Paulie had done to him.

He had to accept his own culpability, too. He’d got strange vibes from the man all night but had been dick-dumb and had ignored his instincts. Except, unless his blurry memory of events failed him, where Chase was concerned. Xavier was as certain as he could be that he’d handled that right, and if it hadn’t been for the EMT’s bursting in, he’d have been able to stroke more than just Chase’s jaw. Xavier doubted it would’ve have mattered to either of them that Josh and Nick were there—the desire that had slammed through his veins had flowed right out and wrapped around Chase as well, drawing the man to him.

Of course, he hadn’t seen Chase since then, which didn’t surprise him at all. Xavier pushed up from the chair, having conquered that particular beast by remaining seated through a round of shaking that had nearly rattled his teeth. He was reaching for the door knob when someone knocked and scared a year off his life. Composing himself took a few seconds, then Xavier opened the door, stepping back to allow Adam in.

Xavier managed to swallow his disappointment as his friend looked him over. It’d been stupid to think for a minute that Chase would’ve been so bold—would’ve come looking for him at all.

“You look good,” Adam said, his gaze intense. “Are you sure you should be back to

work already?”

Xavier would have rolled his eyes if he hadn’t chewed Billy’s ass for the same thing a hundred times over the past years. Instead he turned and walked back to his desk, where he propped a hip on the top of it and settled into what he hoped was a pose that projected a confidence he wasn’t quite feeling yet. He wondered who had shown up with Adam tonight to keep a watch over him, but didn’t ask. He’d find out soon enough.

“I’m fine. Once my body temp was brought down I started feeling a whole lot better.”

Worn out, limp as wet paper, but that was still better than feeling like he was burning from the inside out. “I’ve had enough sleep the past couple of days to recover. And I won’t be run out of my own club by some little shit that has got it in his head that I am responsible for www.total-e-bound.com

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Randy being in jail. That is entirely Randy’s fault, something neither he nor Paulie will likely ever comprehend.”

“Probably not,” Adam admitted, dropping his gaze to the floor. Xavier watched him

and realised the man was uncomfortable for some reason. He waited, figuring Adam would get around to it eventually. And he did, after a full minute of silence. Adam’s shoulders slumped slightly and he shifted from foot to foot before looking up at Xavier.

Xavier nodded.
Bring it on.
He kept his friendliest, least threatening expression in place as Adam took a breath, then another before speaking.

“I also wanted to warn you.” Adam paused, looked back at the open door, then walked

right up to Xavier, close enough he could feel the heat from Adam’s body and scent his shampoo. It didn’t do a thing for Xavier except put him on alert. “Well, not
warn
you like it’s a bad thing, but…tell you, I guess. Chase is here tonight, too.”

“Really.” Somehow Xavier hadn’t expected that. He’d thought Chase would want some

distance, especially after kneeling at Xavier’s feet like he had—and liking it. Drugs or no, Xavier knew he hadn’t imagined the surprise—then acceptance—that had saturated Chase’s features any more than he’d imagined the pleasure the man had felt once the acceptance came.

Adam stepped back and nodded. “Yeah, and I don’t think he’s here looking to hook up

with some anonymous man.” Adam pinned him with an intent green gaze. “I’m surprised he isn’t in here, really. He was prowling through the club like he had a certain goal in mind.”

“Hmm.” Xavier thought about it for a moment. “He’s probably looking for Paulie, not

that he’ll ever get in The Xxchange again. The bouncers would break him in two if he tried.”

“Maybe.”

Xavier stood and unfolded his arms, reaching behind to press at the small of his back while he arched and worked out a kink. He sighed once that was done and started to speak when he heard the scuff of a heel in the hallway. Adam heard it as well, turning and moving further from Xavier. Considering the way his whole body was humming as if fed an electrical current from his toes to the top of his head, Xavier thought he knew who was out in the hall.