92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships (26 page)

“Yeah, but suppose the caller is selling office furniture?” I challenged.

“Doesn’t matter,” Steve said. “The salesperson gets the same reception after the staffer hears why he’s calling. If my staffer says warmly, ‘Oh, office furniture!’ the caller feels good. And I find the salesperson is a lot easier to deal with later.”

I told him, “OK, Steve, starting tomorrow morning, I’m going to put that ‘Oh wow, I’m so happy you called for that reason’ attitude in my voice.”

The next morning, the first call was my dentist’s office. “Ms. Lowndes, this call is to remind you you’re overdue for your sixmonth checkup.”

“Oh, of course, you’re so right,” I cooed. “I’m so glad you called.” The receptionist sounded surprised but very pleased at my reaction. “I can’t book an appointment right now,” I continued,

“but I’ll call you as soon as my schedule frees up.” She didn’t hassle me with her usual “Well, when do you expect that to be?” She just hung up satisfied. (And I got what I wanted—no call from my dentist’s office for at least another six months.)

The second time the phone rang, it was a man who had ordered my tape set calling to complain that one of the tapes broke. “Oh my goodness, I’m so glad you told me about that,” I said with the enthusiasm of having won the lottery. The caller sounded a little shocked but obviously pleased at my reaction. “Of course, I’ll get another set out to you and I hope you accept my apologies.” Caller hung up satisfied. (And I got what I wanted—

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his good will and word of mouth in spite of my tape duplicator’s blooper.)

The third call was tougher. This was from a vendor I had completely forgotten to pay. “Oh, I’m so glad you reminded me of that bill,” I lied. Again, shocked pleasure was the caller’s reaction. (I was probably the first creditor in history who ever sounded happy she’d called.) “In the back of my mind I felt there was one bill I had overlooked. I’m writing the check as we speak.”

Then I got my reward. The dunner said, “By the way, don’t worry about the 2 percent per month late-payment charge. As long as we get your check by the end of the week, it will be OK.” She hung up happy. (And I got a present—no finance charges in spite of my oversight.)

And so it went throughout the rest of the day, the rest of the week, and ever since. Try it. You’ll find you get a lot more from anyone when you smile, after you find out who it is or why they’re calling. Use the “Oh Wow, It’s You!” technique on almost every call.
Technique #62

“Oh Wow, It’s You!”

Don’t answer the phone with an “I’m just sooo happy

all the time” attitude. Answer warmly, crisply, and

professionally. Then, after you hear who is calling, let a huge smile of happiness engulf your entire face and

spill over into your voice. You make your caller feel as though your giant warm fuzzy smile is reserved for him

or her.

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63
How to Sneak Past

the Gatekeeper

“No, No, Aaaaaagh, not The Screen!” Picture a torture device called “The Screen.” The mad scientist, laughing maniacally, forces the victim into a giant meat grinder that mashes him through a heavy-metal screen. It slices his body into a million molecules before he’s reconstituted on the other side. Being screened when you call someone’s office is the emotional version of that ordeal.

You place your cold call. “May I speak to Mr. Jones?” you pleasantly ask.

“Who’s calling?” a haughty voice responds. Of course, your name is not prestigious enough for the screener to grant you the exalted status of speaking to Jones.

Her ruthless interrogation continues, “And what company are you with?” You submit your company’s name, praying it will score with her. And then to top it off, she has the pluck to ask, “And what’s this in reference to?” Aaaaaagh!

Several weeks after my luncheon with Steve, I had the occasion to call him again. “Is Steve Effros available? This is Leil Lowndes calling.”

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“Oh yes, Ms. Lowndes, definitely. Let me put you right through.” I start humming happily as I wait for Steve to come to the line.

A moment later his assistant came back and said sympathetically, “I’m so sorry, Ms. Lowndes. Steve just stepped out to lunch. I know he’ll be sorry he missed your call.” Meanwhile, I’m still smiling. Do I suspect that Steve didn’t “just step out to lunch”?

Do I suspect he’s sitting right there? Do I ever, in my wildest paranoid dreams, think he doesn’t have the time or inclination to talk to me? Do I feel screened? No way! I’m as happy as a carefree kitten as I leave my number for a callback. You see, I have probably fallen for “The Sneaky Screen.”

Technique #63

The Sne aky Screen

If you must screen your calls, instruct your staff to first say cheerfully, “Oh yes, I’ll put you right through. May I tell her who’s calling?” If the party has already

identified himself, it’s “Oh of course, Mr. Whoozit. I’ll put you right through.”

When the secretary comes back with the bad news

that Mr. or Ms. Bigwig is unavailable, callers don’t take it personally and never feel screened. They fall for it every time, just like I did.

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64
How to Get What You

Want on the Phone

from Big Shots

I know a secret about a big cat who owns an international hotel chain with properties in six countries. He hires and fires thousands, awards or pulls immense contracts, borrows from major financial institutions, and makes lavish contributions to charities. Mr. Big Cat (we’ll call him “Ed”) has a respected and immediately recognizable name in his industry. And here’s the secret: Mrs. Big Cat is the real brains behind the operation.

I became friends with Mrs. Big Cat (we’ll call her “Sylvia”) when I did some consulting for her husband’s organization. Sylvia invited me to tea one afternoon. She sweetly apologized that this was “maid’s day off ” so we’d have to fend for ourselves. As we happily perched ourselves on the patio and were about to dive into our tea and crumpets, the phone rang. She excused herself to answer it.

I heard Mrs. Big Cat say, “No, I’m sorry, he’s not in. Shall I tell him who called? . . . No, I don’t know when he is planning on returning, but if you give me your name and . . . No, I said I don’t know what time he’ll be back . . . Yes, I’ll tell him you called.”

As Sylvia returned to the patio, I could she was annoyed by the call. Always on the lookout for a good phone story, I ventured a questioning look.

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Picking up on my curiosity, she said, “That fool thinks he’s going to get a contribution from Ed. Ha!” she laughed wryly. Her candor emboldened me to ask her more. It turns out the caller, a Mr. Creighton, was a fund-raiser for a major charity Ed was considering contributing to. My hostess said Creighton had called twice in the past two weeks when Ed was out. “And not once did he greet me, ask how I was, or apologize for the disturbance.” This did not please Mrs. Big Cat.

Was it a major irritation for Mrs. Big Cat? No, only minor. But did it mean a major loss for the little cat who called? It sure did. In Ed and Sylvia Big Cat’s household, subtleties count. At the dinner table, Mrs. Big Cat could say to her husband, “A very nice man named Creighton called for you today, dear.” Or she might say, “A rather irritating chap named Creighton called for you today.” One comment or the other could mean millions won or lost by Creighton’s charity. And all because little cat Creighton mildly ruffled Mrs. Big Cat’s whiskers.

Home advice: Salute the Spouse. Office advice: Salute the Secretary.

Technique #64

Salute the Spouse

Whenever you are calling someone’s home, always identify and greet the person who answers. Whenever you call

someone’s office more than once or twice, make friends

with the secretary. Anybody who is close enough to answer the phone is close enough to sway the VIP’s opinion of you. A surprising number of Big Cat spouses—and secretaries—

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hiring time, firing time, promoting time, or buying time, many spouses have a say. When it comes to whose calls get through, whose proposals get put on the top of the boss’s desk, who gets luncheon appointments made, secretaries’ opinions count!

Only foolish callers don’t realize all spouses and secretaries have names. All spouses and secretaries have lives. All spouses and secretaries have feelings. All spouses and secretaries have influence. Deal accordingly.

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65
How to Get What You

Want—by Timing!

When Alexander Graham Bell invented the phone, he and his comrades had no use for such trite phrases as “Hi, how ya doin’?”

Bell and his boys never just started spouting their ideas into their listener’s ears. The first words out of their mouths in those times were “Can you talk?” Bell and his buddies were, of course, referring to technical capabilities. Little did they know, more than a hundred years later, big winners would use a form of that same greeting. Today, of course,

“Can you talk?” means “Is it convenient to talk?” Before launching into conversation, they always ask “Is this a good time to chat?”

“Did I catch you at a good time?” “Do you have a minute to discuss the widget account?”

All folks have a Big Ben in their brain that determines how receptive they are going to be to you and your ideas. When you mess with their internal cuckoo clock, they won’t listen to you. No matter how interesting your information, or how pleasant your call, bad timing means bad results for you.

It’s not your fault. Whenever you call someone at home, you never know whether she was sleeping or whether there’s a fire raging in the kitchen stove. Whenever you call someone at work, you
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never know whether he’s got two hours to get a report in or whether the big boss is not-so-patiently sitting on his desk. Whenever you place a call, always—not occasionally, not frequently—always ask about your timing. Make it a habit. Make it a rule. Make it a self-punishable crime if the first words out of your mouth don’t concern the convenience of your timing:

“Hi, Joe, is this a good time to talk?”

“Hello, Susan. Have you got a minute?”

“Hi, Carl, did I catch you good or did I catch you bad?”

“Sam, do you have a second for me to tell you about what happened at the game last Saturday?”

There are many ways to say it, but it all boils down to “Is this a good time to talk?”

My friend Barry, a broadcaster, accomplishes more in a day than most people do in a week. He came up with a clever conversational device that ensures he’ll never shatter anyone’s emotional sundial. He calls it “What Color Is Your Time?” Barry introduces the device by telling people he’s calling he has great respect for their time. He then asks permission to start his future conversations with a question that assures he’ll never disturb them at an inopportune moment. Barry says he’s going to ask what color their time is. They should honestly answer, “red,” “yellow,” or

“green.”

Red means “I’m really rushed.”

Yellow means “I’m busy but what’s on your mind? If it’s quick, we can deal with it.”

Green means “Sure, I’ve got time. Let’s talk.”

Red, like the stoplight at the corner, means stop. Yellow means hurry up, time is short or stop and wait for the next green light. Green means go.

Busy people pick up quickly on his artful device and enjoy the game. Most especially, they enjoy Barry’s sensitivity and respect for their time. In fact, he says, most of his callers play the same 07 (229-264B) part seven 8/14/03 9:19 AM Page 247

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sensitive game when they call him. “Hi Barry, what color is your time? Are you green?”

Salesfolks, Wait for the Green Light

A note here for salespeople. If you ask a prospect if he or she has time to talk and the answer is “Not really, but tell me what’s on your mind,” DON’T! Do not make your sales pitch while he or she is red. Do not talk when he or she is yellow. Wait until green, very green. (If you ever want to see any green coming from your prospect, that is.)

Technique #65

What Color Is Your Time?

No matter how urgent you think your call, always

begin by asking the person about timing. Either use the What Color Is Your Time? device or simply ask, “Is this a convenient time for you to talk?” When you ask

about timing first, you’ll never smash your footprints

right in the middle of your telephone partner’s sands of time. You’ll never get a “No!” just because your timing wasn’t right.

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66
How to Impress

Everyone with Your

Outgoing Voicemail

Message

You can tell a lot about people just from the outgoing messages they leave on their voice mail. “Hello,” his machine answers. “I’m not in right now. But you probably don’t want to talk to me anyway.” Beep. Would you suspect this fellow has an inferiority complex?

“Hello,” her machine answers. “The sound you hear is the barking of our killer Doberman pinscher, Wolf. Please leave a message after the tone.” Beep. Would you suspect this woman is worried about break-ins? Most of us don’t record our personal foibles so conspicuously for the world to hear. Nevertheless, people can hear a lot between the lines of what we say on our voice mail. Last month I needed a graphic artist to do some work for one of my extremely conservative clients. I phoned Mark, an artist whose work I had seen and liked a lot. His answering machine blasted ear-splitting rock music through the receiver. Then his voice boomed over the electric guitar, “Hey there, dude, don’t be crude. Jes’ croon me an earful of sweeeeeeet sounds right at that lone tone. Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Beep. I banged the receiver quickly
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