You Are the Reason (18 page)

I ran my palms up and down the sides of his body, enjoying the feel of naked skin on my hands. His body was beautiful, despite it not being a perfect gym-god bod like the ones in underwear ads. I really preferred Lee’s body to those models. He was lean, verging on skinny, and a pale white color that I knew would burn badly in the sun. He had no chest hair, but when I ran my palms over his pecs, there was the prickle of fuzz, and I realized his hair was so pale it blended with his skin.

As he had previously promised me, his genital area was completely shaved. I looked down and felt the saliva pool in my mouth at the sight. I wanted him. I wanted to suck him. I wanted to fuck him. I wanted to rub myself all over him.

I simply didn’t know which one I wanted to do first.

“Dave?” he whispered to me.

I continued to kiss and lick at the flesh on his stomach. I had his balls in one hand, was flicking his nipple with my other hand and circling his belly button with my tongue. I swallowed and muttered against his skin, “Davo.”

I felt his laughter through the tensing of his stomach muscles, rather than the sound. His cock bumped my chin, and I dipped down further and drew the head into my mouth. I circled it with my tongue and relished the taste.

“Dave?” Lee tried again. When I didn’t respond he chuckled and said, “You there? The guy on the end of my dick?”

I looked up without releasing his cock from my mouth. I arched one eyebrow in query.

He smiled and pulled his legs up until his heels were resting on the bench. The new position opened him up in all sorts of ways that I loved, and a million thoughts ran through my head. Where to start?

“Dave?” he said for the third time. “I want you to fuck me. We can do slow and exploratory sex later. For now? I’ve been waiting weeks. I just want you to do me hard and fast.”

I didn’t need my oracle to give me the correct answer to that one.

“Wait here,” I puffed. “Condom. Lube.”

I dashed away without any further explanation, nearly tripping myself on the pants still around my ankles. I stopped to yank them off and managed to kick my toe on the frying pan and then stab myself with a pen that was lying on the floor. “Shit.”

Finally I was out of the danger zone. I raced to my room. The condoms were in easy reach of my bed. Top drawer. Where else?

I raced back to where I had left Lee and found he’d climbed off my kitchen counter and was leaning over suggestively, waving his butt ever so slowly in my direction.

“Shit,” I moaned and managed to kick the frying pan again with my toe. I reefed out a condom and dropped the rest of the packet on the floor, not caring if it added to the mess. The condom somehow made it on, and I looked around for the lube. “Lube. Lube. Shit. Where’s the lube?” I muttered, searching the clutter on the floor.

“Where you left it? Under your arm?” Lee suggested, and I glanced down and found the tube stuck between my torso and bicep, exactly where I had put it while I placed the condom on.

I smacked his butt cheek for his impertinence. “Be thankful for the lube and count your blessings.”

He glanced over his shoulder and eyed off my erect cock. “Oh, yes. Gonna be counting my blessings soon enough.”

I upended the tube and placed the lube on my dick, then drizzled some down his crack. I watched as the cold gel made him squirm.

“C’mon,” he urged me. “I’ve been waiting for this for ages.”

I threw the lube on the countertop and pushed one finger between his arse cheeks, just to make sure the lube was where it was meant to be. I pushed in with my finger and felt his response. Oh, yes. We were good to go.

“C’mon,” he said again. “Unless you want to flip, and I’ll take your arse for a decent ride.”

I grabbed my dick and held it against his hole while exerting firm but steady pressure. No one was getting a piece of my arse. I knew what I liked, and that was fucking my partner. I pushed in, listening for any sounds of wincing that would require me to wait. Inch by ever-so-careful inch, I slid into place. Lee groaned, but it wasn’t in pain. I held his hips as I moved in that last bit, until I was rested against the round cheeks of his butt.

I rubbed the skin of his back, allowing him the time he needed but keeping both of our minds on the goal. Oh, yes. That wonderful goal.

I held still while Lee rocked a bit, to and fro, to make himself comfortable. He rotated his hips, and I ground my teeth to keep from thrusting until he gave me the green light. He reached around and cupped my thigh.

“Holy shit, Dave.”

“Davo,” I gasped. “My name is Davo. Only the ladies get to call me Dave.”

“I don’t care if your name’s Crab-bait. Just fuck me now.
Please.
”

It was that
please
that got me. An almost keening wail that said “do me now and make it good. Who was I to refuse?

The first flex of my hips was an almost experimental exercise, just making sure we were good to go. Then I pulled back farther and slammed home.

“Oomph. Oh, God. Yesss.”

As Lee hissed out his pleasure, my baser self took control. My hips snapped back and forth of their own volition, plunging back into his body and bringing me closer to climax. It was a heaven that’s hard to describe. My inner being was shouting, rejoicing, climbing while my skin felt so sensitized I could have felt an ant walking across my arm.

I gripped Lee while I allowed myself to fly for endless moments, losing myself in the joy and feel of his body. I could hear him making grunting sounds, calling to me to continue, to go faster—yes, right there.

I opened the eyes I didn’t realize I had closed and focused on his back. There were freckles across his skin, mostly on his shoulders, as if he went shirtless a lot, and the sun had kissed that area. I glanced down to where our bodies were joined and nearly lost myself in the maelstrom of that beautiful sight.

I pumped and then realized I didn’t know what Lee was feeling. Usually it didn’t matter to me. I was normally interested in my own pleasure. As long as my partner wasn’t telling me to stop, I was happy enough that he was enjoying it. But with Lee, it was different. Maybe because I knew more about him than I knew of my other partners. After all, I knew his first
and
last name.

But I came to the realization that it was more than just knowing more about him. It was
caring
about him. He was bent over my kitchen bench, two hands braced on the surface to hold himself steady while I pounded him from behind. I could hear the moans of pleasure from him, but otherwise I knew nothing.

Was he faking it? Was he in pain? Was he close to coming?

I pulled out abruptly and spun him around to look at his face. There was only confusion and surprise in his eyes. I glanced down his body and saw he was still fabulously erect, so all signs pointed to him enjoying himself. But I needed to be sure.

“Davo? What’s wrong?”

I stepped in and kissed him hard. “Nothing’s wrong.” I looked around the room at the papers and pens littering the floor. Then I saw the blue mat I had placed on the tiles where I stood to wash the dishes. It was small and not exactly luxurious, but I found it gave just enough cushioning for my feet and spine that I didn’t get a backache while standing and washing up.

It would do.

Nothing is worse than fucking on cold tiles.

“There.” I pointed. “Lie down on your back.”

Lee hesitated for a moment but willingly obeyed, placed himself on the blue wool, and spread his legs for me to kneel between. He grabbed his erection and squeezed hard as I lined up to enter him again. I pushed in and paused to enjoy the sensation.

“Okay?” he asked me, placing his hand on my shoulder.

I looked up. “Just needed to see your face.”

A small smile played around his mouth. Then it was lost in the hurricane of desire. I watched carefully and had to admit that, yes, he was enjoying himself immensely. This new position—although we would probably both regret it tomorrow with sore knees and an aching back—was better for both of us. Lee grabbed his cock and began furiously jerking himself while I braced with one hand on the nearby cupboard and let go.

I watched, enthralled with the picture before me. Lee, with his red hair mussed, his eyelids at half-mast, his chocolate brown eyes staring at me with lust, his hand a blur on his own erection. And the miles of creamy white skin that I promised myself I would kiss and lick, at some point.

“I’m gonna come,” I said through gritted teeth.

“Yes,” he cried.

I pushed harder and furiously thrust into his body. Then there was the white-hot arc of orgasm zipping through my body and causing me to arch my back. There was the answering feel of wetness between us, and I could feel Lee’s body respond, his own climax claiming him, making him squeeze me tight. His legs around me were as strong and tight as a piano wire.

I gently rocked into him, prolonging the pleasure and coming down off my fluffy cloud. He went slack beneath me, and his legs dropped to the side as if he were too wasted to hold them any longer. I knew the feeling. I chuckled and pulled out. Then I collapsed to the side of him and managed to hit my head on the damn frying pan.

“Fuck,” I cursed and shoved it across the room.

Lee chuckled and placed a warm hand on my thigh. “That frying pan is out to get you.”

I leaned over and placed a kiss on his sweaty head. “Too bad. I got you instead. And I’m not trading.”

There was an answering squeeze of fingers on my thigh. We lay on the floor of my kitchen, recovering and savoring our closeness. “You want to sleep over tonight?” I offered. “I’ll make you breakfast if you don’t sneak off this time.”

He turned his head and smiled, his white teeth showing through his pouty lips. “Sure. No bearded lady tonight.”

I ran my hand across his chest, rubbing his nipples and smearing the wetness I found. “And I’m really glad for that. You know, I was really worried that you had turned me straight. I couldn’t believe I was attracted so strongly to a woman.”

We smiled at each other in shared remembrance.

A
FTER
THAT
night, Lee began testing my boundaries. At first I was uncomfortable, but I got used to it.

The first bit was a touch of makeup that he wore on our third date. As promised, I took him to a live performance. It was a musical reproduction of
Grease
—but with a tweak to make it a gay version with an all-male cast.

I went to pick him up and was chatting with Howard about production problems of post-manufacturing foreign designs when Lee appeared. Only fifteen minutes late. He was getting better.

He was also wearing a gorgeous shimmering blue shirt and black eyeliner.

He looked… gay.

I swallowed my discomfort and smiled bravely. I could do it. I could date a guy with eyeliner.

He was eyeing me really closely, so I don’t think I was able to hide all of my unease. Or perhaps he was testing me. I pushed down my inner resentment and told myself to grow up. I grabbed his arm and placed a kiss on his cheek to show him that I was in it. Despite my embarrassment at being seen with one of
those
gays.

It was my first time going to any sort of gay pride gathering. Night clubs and bars weren’t counted—because they’re simply hookup joints. A place to find someone to get your rocks off. A gay musical, on the other hand, would attract all sorts of gay people—and the flamboyant ones would be out in force.

I was right.

The first person I spotted at the door of the theater had rainbow stripes through his hair. I clenched my jaw and set my face in stone. We walked toward the place, and I could see
them
out in numbers. Pink hair. Earrings. High-heel boots. Pants so tight they were cutting off the circulation. Shirts cut so low you could nearly see their belly buttons.

Lee groped for my hand, and I pulled away in horror. PDA? Here? “Chicken,” he whispered to me. Thankfully he didn’t press the point. We walked farther into the crowd, and I began to notice other things.

The
normal
looking people. And to my surprise, there were a lot of them. There were mums and teenagers. Business suits and pencil pushers. Flamboyant gays, but also flamboyant straight people. And none of them gave me a single look. None of them cared a bit. None of them pointed or stared or even whispered behind their hands at the fact that I was with Lee.

Oh. Except for the older, limp-wristed, martini-drinking guy who stopped and looked me up and down as if I were naked and on display. “Oh,
hel-looo darling
,” he cooed at me with a smile that was supposed to be seductive but looked predatory.

Lee stepped between us and bared his metaphorical claws. “Mine,” he declared and wrapped his arm around my elbow. The man gave him a shrug of discontent and turned away without further comment.