Wolf Sirens: Forbidden: Discover The Legend (15 page)

I often wondered why she hadn’t joined them,
cut her losses and fallen in with them. Did she hate
Sam so much? Did she hate what she had become?
They were surely the only ones who understood her?
I underestimated the undercurrent, which made her.
I had not yet felt its force, upon myself.
Reid had explained it to me before the funeral.
The desire for hunters was strong; they wanted to kill
werewolves and were destined for no other path once
they had been triggered by the scent of one of their
enemy. It was an impulse that was inborn. The instinct needed training and honing in. Cresida needed
less of this because she was bitten and instantly transformed into a killing machine. Whether she liked it
or not there was no cure - destiny chose you. Sam’s
jagged bite was the kiss of death for her; she had the
skill but not the desire - not as it had been. Reid was
right, she was compromised, no longer an agent for
the hunter. She had unwittingly mixed business with
pleasure and become what she hated most. Cresida
was suffering a slow death.
Reid threw an arm around me, his plate was
empty, and I chewed the remaining two thirds of my
drying bread. Contemplating the newly acquired information in the secrecy of my mind, Reid looked at
me. “Staring into space?” he questioned.
Hardly. I smiled reassuringly at him.
I didn’t know then that I was the one who was
supposed to put her out of her misery.

I had however, been transformed into a lusting girl.
My heart was pulsing like a butterfly - an effect
induced by the scent of the wolves, of earthy musk
and honey.Though it was risking my life in more ways
than one, I did not want to consider the worst part:
that my feelings betrayed his best friend and his girl
friend, Sam - let alone the implications for my life.
And the bitter truth was he barely noticed I existed.
This was not mutual and I was going mad, he was so
far out of my league, preoccupied and I felt disdain
in his glances. I couldn’t imagine him with me, a
human - an unattractive human girl. One thing gave
me hope though: the fact that he had loved another
human girl before, Cresida, before he knew what she
was. So maybe it wasn’t so crazy to want to believe
he could love me. I buried my head in the pillow,
embarrassed for my own obsession that had crept up
on me like the tide, and I was in it up to my neck.

No matter how much I tried to prepare myself,
when he walked into practice my breathing became
laboured as I struggled to maintain composure. I
wondered if becoming a wolf would put me back in
control of my body. I began to sweat. He was more
beautiful than my mind could imagine in the dark of
my room when Reid left me at night.

I flushed bright red. What was happening to me?
I steadied my breathing and urged myself to control my body. This practice session was going to be
torture in more ways than one. What was this feeling? I asked myself again and again; the sensation.
I pined for him. I desired him in every moment of
every day and melted into a blubbering heap, inside,
in his presence. Every spare moment was dissolved
in thoughts of him. I became more and more distant
and indifferent to Reid. My feelings, or lack of them,
were the polar opposite of my emotions for Sky.

One evening I pushed Reid away from me. He
looked alarmed.
“I just need some personal space,” I said quietly, not wanting to make an issue of it. He obeyed
my subtle request but stayed near. He enquired if I
had doubts about him and I denied I had, though I
misconstrued his meaning. He asked about practice
and if I had spoken to Sky. I used the opportunity to
complain about Sky’s indifference and standoffishness with me. I implied I was disgruntled with him
somehow.
“He’s the ‘suffer in silence’ type, huh?”
“He’s my best mate, I don’t know.” Reid only listened and offered no real excuse other than that Sky
thought it was too dangerous for me to be in the pack,
near them, after Cresida. Reid disagreed, of course,
and Sam was adamant I was to stay, so he couldn’t
do anything about it. The fact that Sky wanted to
protect me warmed my heart; the fact that he didn’t
want me around wounded it. My passionate feelings
for him could only be displayed as dislike and then
disdain. I hoped his reaction to me was the same. I
wished I did to him what he did to me.

My shoulders ached, I had a bruise on one of them
where Giny had kicked me accidentally during a hold
and my lower back ached. Even my feet hurt and my
ankles must have been swollen.

“Practice was brutal,” I moaned to Reid when we
got home. He met me up in my room. It wasn’t necessary to sneak about anymore but I let it continue
that way because I knew Sophie would be able to
tell I didn’t feel as strongly as he felt for me. I knew
we couldn’t last much longer. I didn’t want to have to
explain why to anyone. It would have been embarrassing to admit and I would have needed to lie. My
unreciprocated crush on Sky mortified me.

“You’re trying to keep up with the supernatural,
I’m talking to Sam, and this isn’t fair on you,” Reid
worried aloud.

For all his brawn, he could be so tender. I lay on
my bed and he sat at my side and pulled off my shoes
and rubbed my feet around in circles massaging the
soles. Suddenly he was gone, disappearing into the
cupboard with a bump, before my door cracked open.
My mother asked me what was wrong.

“Oh, my legs hurt from practice with the girls.”
I made a mental note not to be quite so complacent,
“I’m going over to Sam’s tonight if that’s okay?” I
asked calmly as I lay on the bed, though I’d never had
to ask for permission. I needed to tell her where I
was, to avoid further intrusion. She didn’t pry further
that way. Something I really appreciated at times.

“Alright,” she said, upbeat.“I’m going out tonight
as well. I won’t worry about dinner then?”
“No,there’s no need to,Sam’s got plenty.”I thought
of all the piles of pizza they all went through, with
a smile. “Where are you going?” I asked, suddenly
interested. We were still new in town and my mother
had never been a night owl. Did this mean her depression was over?
“With some ladies from work, to a bar or something? Why?” she said equally inquisitive. I suppose
maybe I’d never asked her things like this before.
“No reason,” I said as I lay my head back against
the bed.
“Okay, then I’ll see you later tonight?”She paused.
“Should I shut this?” She gestured holding the door.
“Yes,” I agreed casually, without missing a beat.
Her question made me wonder if she’d cottoned on
to my visitor. I imagined her lurking outside, ear to
the wall. But I didn’t care and out of the cupboard
peeked my boyfriend who just happened to have sonar ears and stealth speed. Even if she heard us, she’d
never catch him.
After her car sped off Reid wasted no time. He
kissed my lips, warm and wet, as we made out in my
room.
“Do you think I should meet her?”
“Who?” I said lazily.
“Your mum?”
“Oh, why?” I did my best to sound bored.
“Well I’m your boyfriend right?”
“Right,” I teased.
“So shouldn’t I meet her?” he asked seriously.
“I don’t see why Reid? Isn’t it dangerous to involve her?”
“What do you mean?” Offence coated his voice.
“I don’t see the point?” Sophie knew I dated
him, I guessed. She would have heard it in town; the
Penny Market was gossip central, second only to the
town Pharmacy.
“You don’t see the point in your mother knowing
what your boyfriend looks like – or even that you
have one? It might make all this sneaking around
easier.”
“No, it wouldn’t Reid, it might make it more difficult, I don’t need the hassle.” I stretched.
“Oh, okay.” His voice was sarcastic.
“Is something wrong?” I screwed my nose up.
“I just thought…we were serious?” He shrugged.
I wanted to say we weren’t but I would have confused the situation further and I knew breaking up
with him wasn’t something I necessarily wanted. I’m
sure he heard my heart thud as I panicked a little.
“Should I go?” He sat up disgruntled.
“No, please don’t go…I love you.”
What was I
saying?
He slid onto the mattress and ran his hands up
my legs, firmly, and we made love on the bed. I never
thought my first time would be with a beast halfman, half wolf. Afterward I felt numb and Sky was
still the foremost in my mind. I wanted his hands
grabbing my body, not Reid’s. I let him have sex with
me out of guilt. I was infatuated with his best friend.
I burned for him; maybe I imagined it was him? Reid
didn’t seem to notice.
“Reid?”
“Yeah.”
“I was just wondering?”
“Yeah.”
“-If you can have children, if werewolves breed?”
“Why, you want one?” He smiled teasingly.
I ignored him.
“So you have to be created only, you’re not able to
procreate?” I had wanted to know everything.
“No, sterile, I guess.” He shrugged.
“But you look so youthful?”
“So what? We should have useful sperm?” He sat
up on his elbow.
“Youthful, I said youthful, not useful.” I laughed.
He giggled too, embarrassed.
“Maybe I have my after-sex ears on.” We laughed
as if letting out the tension.
More seriously he replied as an afterthought,
“No, we have to create…if we want one– a family.
Like Sam’s done.” He chomped his teeth together as
though biting the air.
“Not with your…” I laughed looking at the area
in question trying to peek under the blanket, which
he modestly pulled down.
“No, only with our…” he pointed to his teeth and
smiled. He bit me softly, kissing the skin over my
shoulder and chest.
“Stop! It tickles.” I moved away. I sat up and
drank some water from the bedside, feeling a familiar
tug of guilt, but I pushed it aside.
“So, Sam created a pack with you and Bianca and
Sky.” I hoped he didn’t notice me stumble over
his
name.
“Yeah, sort of, but Sam didn’t create me.”
“Who did – Sky?” I guessed.
“No, Lily actually.”
I looked over in disbelief and then surprise.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I sounded as shocked
as I felt as the blood drained from my face. Surely
there was a connection between wolves and whoever
made them immortal, especially if they knew them.
I had severed it. I was stunned for a moment. I felt
a pang, because perhaps she loved him? I knew instantly that was why she hated me. I put my hand
over my throat. Perhaps this was the reason I felt so
bad being with him, that I had sensed it.
“It’s okay, I didn’t feel obligated to her like Sky
did to Sam.”
“Reid, I didn’t know.” I searched his face for the
traces of pain losing a loved one left. “Did you love
her?” I had already decided not to believe him if he
denied it.
“Lily didn’t have the same talents as Sam.”
“Talents – what do you mean?” I exclaimed. He
had mentioned this previously but I had been full of
other more pressing curiosities at the time to notice
the importance.
“Well, it seems to us that Sam has a talent for…
persuasiveness. It probably explains why she has
stayed Alpha for so long, her whole life…as a wolf.”
“What do you mean?”
“She’s able to very subtly get people to agree with
her, especially if part of them wants to.” He shrugged.
“Like super charisma or something?” I was
intrigued.
“Yes, but stronger and if they are…gullible, she
does it with ease, like a hypnotist, on anyone she
wants.”
I took in the information. “She hasn’t tried it on
me has she?” I asked suddenly fearful. I hadn’t realized her power over people to be so strong.
“She knows free will is best, so we tried that first.
Then when she tried a little to test it out on you, she
knew you were very strong willed and wouldn’t follow easily.”
“Why? Is that unusual?”
“No, just rare.” He could see I was thirsty for
more. “Sky and I stopped her. There’s the weak, the
medium and the strong willed - I guess, and most
people are…weak to medium and you’re up there in
the strong category.” He gestured, apologetically.
“What are you?” I questioned, curiosity enthralling me.
“Umm…medium-strong, probably.”
“You just made up your own category,” I accused.
“I made them all up. It’s not that simple, anyway, I was just dummying it down for you. It depends
on many things, like if you want to believe her or
not, for instance…do you understand?” he said concerned. “Don’t become complacent or drunk around
her because she will have you do anything she wants,
basically,” Reid warned.
I wondered why he hadn’t told me before. “Can
you tell? Do you know when she’s doing it?” I
worried.
“No, she usually does it when she’s one-on-one.
So no one can tell you, she infiltrates your subconscious.” I felt the warning he was trying to convey as
his eyes pleaded. “Only if you’re clever or wise to it,
only if you want to resist –but it all comes naturally to
you,” he added happily, shrugging. Reid had tried to
let me in on this secret but then I had been too naïve
to understand his subtle warning.
“Why?”
He smiled. “It just does – you’re already awake,
you’re special, more than you know.”
He was being sweet. “Thanks.” I wasn’t sure what
he meant by ‘awake’.
Now I was wise to it I made a note to be careful
of this trait. “Do you have talents also?” I wondered
about the others, about Sky. Were they all under her
influence? Or did they assert their own?
“No, I don’t know actually. They can take ages
to develop or just be so subtle you may not notice
for some time. It can just be like – something you
were good at in life, can just become more powerful or effective in this life.” He gestured to himself.“I
wonder all the time what mine is, if I’ll ever have it.”
He looked at me, assessing my reaction as he began
to dress, finding his jeans.
“Do you know when she’s using it on you?” I
enquired.
He breathed in. “You get to know it.” I wondered
what she had done to him - or if he even knew.
I looked into his eyes “Does Sky have a gift?”
“What makes you think that?” He smiled.
“I don’t know,” I said thoughtfully – whilst remembering to ask about the others as much as I
asked about Sky. I tried not to flush.
He pulled on his jeans and was looking about for
his shirt.
“We don’t know the extent of it but he seems to
be oddly good with the ladies.” He smiled wide and I
knew from his bursting snicker that he was just teasing me. I hoped then that he hadn’t cottoned on to
how much I was taken with Sky and I checked his
tone to see if there was a hint of disdain. I hoped to
hide my interest in him behind a façade, of wanting
to know more about Reid, by understanding his best
friend. Reid slid off the bed.
He was standing shirtless but otherwise clothed
in front of me then. I saw the beginnings of a five
o’clock shadow across his jaw. He was magnificent in
his own right and I was stupid to have eyes for any
other. He knew better than to be insecure. “What?”
he said noticing the lack of amusement in my gaze.
He bent down on his knee and crouched lower to
look into my eyes.
I whispered, frowning. “How do you know Sam
does it, hypnotizes … if you don’t know when she has
done it to you?” I worried.
“You’re not frightened are you, by all this?” He
frowned back.
“No,” I answered, “but there’s a million things I
want to know.” My eyes searched his amber irises,
which up close displayed the deep crevasses and patterns of the surface of Jupiter.
“And then some,” he added, a broad smile spreading across his face and disappearing behind a serious
expression. “Sky picked up on it. He’s got my back…
we stick together and she has agreed not to exercise
her gift with us,” he said, seemingly brushing it off,
looking away.
“Do you trust her, Reid?” I asked still concerned,
despite his efforts to reassure me.
He looked down. “Short answer - no. Sky said he
would only get back with her, if she agreed never to
do it.”
“And she did?” I imagined Sky bargaining with
her. I knew it wouldn’t have been that simple. Reid
had a way of washing over details.
“No, she blatantly tried it on you, at lunch.”
In a second I remembered the moment clearly,
he didn’t need to elaborate. The first day they had
approached me in the canteen was vivid in my mind.
“– And Sky called her away?”
“Yeah, but he didn’t break it off with her until
after the river she wa-.” He stopped.
The pause was obvious “Have I asked too much?”
I offered.
“No, you have a right to know, I guess.” He
seemed to be thinking. “But we have to be careful,
you’re still new to the pack.” He stopped then, but
I felt he wasn’t finished. I wondered how persuasive
Sam could be, if she was the reason he didn’t speak of
certain things, if he had been editing. I couldn’t tell.
He pulled a shirt over his arms. Maybe he was in the
dark too. Neither did he talk about the animals he
killed with his bare teeth; out in the woods, I knew
he was ashamed. But he needn’t have been.
I thought aloud.“Reid. Am I supposed to become
one of you?” I whispered. This had come out before
I had considered the implications of his answer. We
had talked about this before. But now it was more serious. I knew more now and I hoped this was because
they would turn me.
I waited for his reply with bated breath. The answer came as a question.
“Do you want to?” he asked. He sounded genuinely curious. He was open, readable again now.
I was surprised that he even had to ask. “Yes,” I
breathed, honestly, without adding more.
“Huh!” He laughed once. “Just like that?” He
spoke as if to himself, buttoning his shirt up.
“I know it’s not that easy.” I didn’t want him to
think I was naive. But I would never have spoken my
real thoughts, which whispered from the recesses of
my mind.They were buried, but no matter how much
I covered them, I still felt the muffled thoughts. Reid
threw his jacket on – this was purely for looks, he did
not need its warmth.
The thought of becoming a werewolf appealed
to me, not for Reid or the eternal life, or anything
- but the possibility that then I would be beautiful
enough for Sky. I guess so maybe, one day, I could be
his
. Every day I spent with Reid made this thought
seem more ruthless, but I didn’t believe I would ever
have Sky, no matter what body I was in. I wanted to
make the pain go away. It didn’t make sense even to
me, and it wasn’t a choice to need him. I would have
done anything to be near him, in his world for eternity, despite Reid, Sam, despite logic and despite
myself. I wanted him so desperately, though I knew
the implications of such a desire. I was embarrassed
for myself, but the feelings wouldn’t subside. I wondered if Sam’s talent could bring things you wanted
to keep hidden, to the surface. Like the fact that I
had a dangerously obvious crush on her boyfriend.
I feared talking in my sleep and made a deliberate effort not to be alone with her. Cresida couldn’t
protect me from revealing secrets or brain washing
– for that I was on my own.
Reid rubbed his warm hands over my shoulders
and ran his arms around me in an embrace. I snuggled into his heat, sheltered in the coat.
“Are you going?” I asked into his chest.
“Yeah,” he breathed.
“Don’t phase until you’re past next-door,” I
warned pulling away.
He laughed a deep chuckle. “Ben Flinds has been
a bad shot his whole life.”
“He might improve.”
Or get lucky
, I thought.
Reid smirked. “Yeah, maybe, when he’s not
pissed.”
I smiled. “Just watch his gun, I think he is making
a sport of it, watching for targets.”
“Even if I walked past him with a sign on my ass
in broad daylight he would miss.”
“What if he wasn’t drunk?” I glared.
“He’d still miss!”
I looked at him sternly.
His smile faded.
“It wouldn’t kill me you know?” he said.
“But you’d be hurt.” I squinted.
“Yeah, it depends.”
“On what?”
“Where we get hurt.”
“Where’s that?” I pressed, undeterred.
“So many questions, Lila.” He moved uncomfortably. I felt puzzled by his sudden evasiveness.
“I can’t tell you my weakness.”His soft eyes steadied on my face.