With Every Breath (5 page)

She eased inside, not wanting to draw any undue attention to her entrance.

No such luck.

As she did a quick survey of the room, her gaze unerringly settled on Sterling and she froze when she saw his eyes solidly fixed on her. He'd evidently clocked her the moment she'd walked in the door as if he'd been waiting for her—had he? And he stared at her with those piercing dark eyes that never missed a damn thing and when she thought things couldn't get worse than the fact he'd obviously been keeping an eye out for her arrival, he began shoving through the crowd not even caring that he was being rude and pushing people out of his way. And he was making a beeline for
her
.

Damn his arrogant, smug ass straight to hell. She was here. So why was he so intent on making a scene when he'd been the one so adamant that things be perfect for Gracie's debut, had been pissed that Gracie's feelings would be hurt if
all
her friends weren't here.

She glanced left and right looking for an escape route, any escape route so she could melt into the crowd and not be there when Sterling shoved into her space. Or maybe she could fake a sudden onset of the flu or some wicked stomach virus. Food poisoning! But then she hadn't eaten her forgotten takeout in her car because the damn man had forced a confrontation on her turf and well, after that, her appetite had fled.

A waiter bearing a tray full of champagne glasses brushed by her and she lunged for one of the glasses and then on impulse grabbed another one. If this wasn't a double-fisted drinking occasion she didn't know what was. She gulped down the contents before the waiter had time to move on and she plunked the empty down with a thud and quickly nabbed another two. The waiter gave her a wary glance and hastily went on to the next patron.

Too bad they were serving smaltzy alcohol and not something more fitting. Like vodka or tequila. Preferably in a solo cup instead of a tiny-ass shot glass. She needed all the liquid courage she could muster for what she could only describe as the night from hell.

Avoiding one person was difficult enough, though God knew she'd had plenty of practice avoiding Sterling. Hell, she'd become an expert. But having to avoid not only a knuckles-dragging-the-ground Neanderthal but also a woman she considered a friend, who just happened to have the ability to read minds, stretched even Eliza's impressive set of skills.

Knowing that Sterling was the lesser of the two evils because he could
think
what he wanted, she resigned herself to having to grind her teeth and somehow get through the next hour without getting close enough to Gracie to be busted. At least
he
couldn't see into her head and
know
everything she was thinking.

The damn bastard's eyes were full of laughter though his lips and expression reflected none of the humor in his gaze.

“You came,” he drawled.

She sent him an acid look that normally withered the recipient but Sterling didn't even flinch.

“Wow, your powers of observation are astounding,” she mocked sweetly, giving him her most saccharine smile. “And you stating the obvious is ever so intelligent. I find smart men
soooo
attractive. Too bad you're lacking in the IQ department.”

“I
must
be stupid,” he said, his words laced with sarcasm and a bite she'd become all too acquainted with.

She lifted an eyebrow, shocked to hear those words coming out of his mouth. If he was nothing else, he was decidedly sure of himself. Confident. Arrogant. Cocky. No one could ever call him humble.

“If I had half a brain, then I'd stay the hell away from you,” he growled.

Only because she lifted one of the two champagne glasses she held to her lips was she able to prevent her mouth from falling open. What the hell was that supposed to mean?

“Then use the other half and do what the missing half would if it were present,” she said sweetly. “Because apparently common sense left with the missing half as well. Stay the hell away from me, Sterling, and make us
both
happy.”

And then it happened again. He smiled, teeth flashing, and he threw back his head and issued a throaty laugh that gave her actual goose bumps. His smile and that laugh were so devastatingly sexy they should be outlawed. Jesus, no wonder he had a veritable parade of women in and out of his bedroom.

His gaze drifted down to the two champagne flutes she had a death grip on and his eyes continued to twinkle with silent laughter. Even forced to be in his company for a short time was worth hearing him laugh and seeing that breathtaking smile. Twice she'd seen it now. In the same day. Surely the world was ending.

Or at least hers was.

Her thoughts quickly sobered because once again, for just a few seconds, she forgot herself. Forgot that this was her last night to see Ramie and Ari. Grief overwhelmed her because she wouldn't
get
to say goodbye to Gracie. And in the morning she'd say a silent farewell, a permanent farewell to the people she worked with. Her family. And, God, Dane.

Sterling's eyes narrowed, losing the amusement so prevalent just seconds before. His lips became a thin line and his jaw bulged, his cheekbones more defined as he stared piercingly at her.

“What the hell is going on with you, Eliza?” he asked quietly.

She lifted her glass and drained the contents, glancing frantically around for one of the servers, though she still had one full glass left. Seeing no one, she raised her last glass to her lips, or rather was in the process when Sterling intercepted it, wresting it from her grasp.

“What are you doing?” Eliza demanded. “That was my drink!”

“Your third,” he said dryly. “Is this the only way you can work up the courage to face me? By getting shit-faced as soon as you walk through the door?”

She fought the heat and betraying flush that crept slowly up her neck. She never blushed. Nothing embarrassed her. Pissed her off? Yeah. And she tended to get red in the face then, so she would have no problem passing off her embarrassment as rage.

“Sorry to have offended your prudish sensibilities,” she said snidely. “Or maybe there is a drink limit I wasn't aware of? You getting cheap, Sterling? Can't afford free booze so you expect everyone to limit their intake?”

He shook his head, the half grin, half grimace back in place. Well, at least he was no longer prying or trying to pry into her thoughts.

“You are so full of shit, Eliza,” he said in what sounded like an exasperated tone but nothing seemed to fluster the man. Not that she'd ever witnessed. “Now, what were you thinking about a minute ago? Care to share?”

So much for him no longer being nosy.

“No, I don't care to share,” she said in a frosty voice. “I don't care to share anything with you, Sterling. Not your company, not your presence. I don't want to share the same space or even the same air you do so
get out of my way and leave me alone
.”

He didn't respond, instead turning as if to walk away. Oh God, please let her prayer be answered. Just when she thought her fervent prayer had been granted, Sterling snagged her elbow and deftly escorted her through the crowd.

Apparently God was occupied with far more important things than indulging in her cowardice. She could hardly blame him. After all, she'd rather save her prayers for when she really needed them, and she would need them soon.

“What do you think you're doing?” she hissed.

He shot her a pissed off look—a look she was intimately acquainted with, having been the recipient of it every time their paths crossed.

“Taking you to your posse,” he said in a tone that matched his expression.

That brightened her considerably until she looked to the group they were approaching and saw that Gracie was in the middle of them looking stunning. Shy and overwhelmed but drop-dead gorgeous and deliriously happy. Her heart ached just to see the group of people she worked with, called friends, people she loved and people who had one hundred and ten percent of her loyalty.

Inwardly she cringed because her thought had been in the present tense. She had been loyal to them. Until now. She'd never lied to them. Until now. And she'd never deceived them. Until fucking now.

“Gracie will be thrilled you're here,” Sterling murmured.

Thank God Gracie hadn't looked away from her husband to see Eliza yet. Eliza stopped in her tracks, nearly tripping because Sterling was still in the process of his long-legged stride and well, her legs were considerably shorter.

He frowned, rounding on her, purposely positioning himself between her and the DSS group, something she was grateful for even though she knew he hadn't done it for her. He'd done it so Gracie wouldn't see Eliza and realize that Eliza had no intention of speaking to her.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Sterling snapped, his eyes blazing with anger and judgment. Oh yeah, he'd judged her and found her lacking all right. He thought her the worst sort of person and an even worse friend.

Eliza closed her eyes, so miserable she wanted to do something that appalled her. She wanted to cry.

“It's not what you think,” she choked out, her mind churning to come up with a plausible excuse.

“What I think is that you're being a selfish bitch and shitting all over someone who risked her life to save you. Someone who took a fucking knife and was slashed because she was trying to get to you, to do whatever she could to protect you when you were helpless.”

“Don't you think I know that?” she yelled, thanking the heavens that the music and the huge group of people mingling and conversing drowned out her passionate outburst. “Don't you think I relive that moment every fucking night? Every goddamn
day
for that matter. Do you think I would have
ever
wanted Gracie, Ramie or Ari to risk themselves the way they did to help
me
? I would give my
life
for them.
All
of them,” she raged, gesturing to where the rest of the DSS group was standing.

Sterling looked genuinely perplexed as he studied her. Almost as if he had some built-in “Eliza truth detector” able to ferret out what was truth and what was lie. Then sudden realization dawned on his features. She could practically see the “aha” moment in his eyes and on his face. His eyes became sharp and piercing, examining every inch of her face as if he could see behind her outer mask.

Fuck this. Only one man had been able to do that and she'd spent years finding ways of mentally strengthening her natural shields and barriers. She'd taken every class on psychic abilities available. She'd read countless books on the subject matter. Dug through thousands of articles. She would love the chance to try her blocking abilities with Gracie, but she hadn't thought she'd ever need that ability until that damn phone call and now she couldn't take the chance. She couldn't risk not being able to block Gracie from her mind and, besides, if she couldn't block Gracie she would be defenseless against Thomas. And right now, all she had was
hope
that she would be successful. If she knew she would fail, then her already flagging confidence and courage would vanish and she'd be spilling the entire story to Dane, begging for his help or running in the opposite direction as Thomas instead of straight to him. As far from his reach as she possibly could, even if it meant landing halfway across the world. But even there, he'd find her. She knew he would and that made her feel even more helpless.

“What is it you don't want Gracie knowing, Eliza?” Sterling asked so softly that she almost didn't hear him above the surrounding noise.

Eliza froze. She had to act fast. She'd always been good on her feet and quick-witted—when she
had
her wits about her. In other circumstances she would be smug and triumphant at how easily she thought of a way to throw Sterling off her trail, but right now she just felt desperate and scared to death he'd see right through her lie. Well part of it was a lie. Part of it was truth. Just the
details
were muggy.

Her face fell, a carefully orchestrated act as if she'd been caught out and wasn't happy about it. She even managed a convincing glare from underneath her eyelashes, one that told him what she thought of his intrusion into her privacy.

“I've been planning a surprise for her,” Eliza said grudgingly, making sure she sounded her normal pissed off self any time she came face-to-face with Sterling, which until yesterday hadn't been often. Why he suddenly popped up on her radar after so long of mutual avoidance she had no clue. But whatever the reason he could just slink back to whatever rock he lived under and get the hell out of her life.

“A surprise?”

There was no disguising the outright disbelief in his voice or expression. His eyes narrowed dangerously, and it was clear his Eliza-truth radar was beeping nonstop. He looked as though he wanted to wrap his hands around her neck and throttle her. Given his really large hands, she doubted he'd have any difficulty.

“Wade,” she said in a pleading voice, giving him her best big-eyed totally girl plea. It wasn't a look she could remember using in a very long time. It was rare for her to dip into her feminine arsenal when a snarl, a threat or an ass-kicking would achieve the same results. But she could do none of those things with a roomful of people surrounding her and worse, every single person she worked with was halfway across the room and they'd certainly notice.

He looked shocked, his eyes widening and he stared at her like he didn't know whether to throttle her, kiss her—oh God!—or take her to the hospital for psychiatric evaluation.

“That's the first time you've ever said my name,” he said in a low husky voice that made her knees go weak and tremble. A voice and expression that said he liked it. A
lot
. His eyes were soft, a slight crinkle at the corners as he studied her, and for some reason her gaze was drawn to his lips that weren't contorted into his usual Eliza scowl of exasperation. In fact, the ends were curled upward slightly, not a smile. Something altogether different. Something she wasn't about to analyze or figure out because his entire body language had changed and, worse, his hold on her had tightened so an air of intimacy shrouded them.
Now
she realized she should have gone with the snarl, threats and ass-kicking.
Fuck!