Winter Hopes (Seasons of Love) (9 page)

“I told you. I miss my son.” Matt stared back at her, meeting her doubtful gaze. “He’s my only child. He’s probably the only kid I’ll ever have. I don’t want to miss his growing up. And since I live so close, there’s no reason for me to. I want to be a part of his life. And that’ll be easier if you and I get along. So I want to try. That’s it. Is that really so hard for you to believe?”

Lydia looked at Matt’s face—the face she used to know so well, a
face that now seemed to belong to a stranger. His pale blue eyes
implored
her. Matt had been a terrible husband, but a half-decent father, in
spite of his many shortcomings. She could give him that much. She knew how deeply he loved Andy.

She finally said in a quiet voice, “No. It’s not so hard to believe. It’s just surprising to hear you say it.” She pressed her lips together
as a thought occurred to her. Her eyes brightened. “I tell you what,”
she said. “I’m going into the city next weekend to meet… a friend. For the day. On Saturday.”

“Who, Melanie?” Matt asked.

“Yeah,” she lied. “And it’s going to be a long day for me,
probably both lunch and dinner. Jane was going to take Andy for the day… but what if we tried a sleepover again? You could pick him up early on Saturday morning, and bring him back home Sunday around dinner time. Would you want to do that?”

“Yes,” Matt said eagerly. “Yeah, that’d be great.”

“Okay. Then we’ll do that. And if it goes well… we’ll talk about taking it from there. We’ll see. Alright?”

“Yeah, alright.” Matt gazed at her and said earnestly, “Thank you.”

She nodded. Shrieks from inside came through the small crack in the open door. “Sounds like they’re going through the candy,” she said. “Let’s go in.”

SAM SAT DOWN
at his computer to check his email. It had been a quiet but productive Sunday. He’d started off with his run, as he did
early every morning, then gone to the gym for some light weight
training. He only did that twice a week since he'd gotten the
promotion.
After a shower, he’d taken care of a few errands, then decided to take
advantage of the lovely autumn day and gone to the park. He’d
stayed there for hours, reading the book he’d started earlier that week.

He took in the crisp air and colorful foliage from his park bench,
and watched families around him enjoying picnics, activities,
games—parents and children enjoying being together. He felt the tiny pang,
as he had been more and more over the past year. Scenes like this
reminded him that he was now thirty-five and without a family of his own. He watched the families around him wistfully, noting their
closeness and listening to the conversations, and found himself
wondering for the thousandth time what a child of his and Chelsea’s might have looked like.

After about four hours, he’d finished reading the book, so he’d
headed home to check his email, have some dinner, and maybe
watch some football or a movie.

Once home, Sam sat at his computer desk as he listened to two
messages on his voice mail—work intruding, even late on a Sunday afternoon. He sighed. He put his cell phone aside and sipped the beer he’d opened. When he brought the monitor to life, he was glad to see there weren’t too many emails waiting for him. In his personal account, the inbox was never overloaded the way his work email always was. A few jokes from John and Everett, a hello email from Alec, an email from Paige with pictures of the kids attached… he noticed an email from Lydia, sent earlier that day, and smiled as he clicked on that one first.

Hi Sam,

Hope you’re having a good weekend. Thought I’d send you a few pictures from trick or treating yesterday. We had a great day.

Call me in the afternoon if you’re around. Matt has Andy with him (as he does every Sunday) so I’ll be free to talk. I’m going out in the morning, but will be home reading all afternoon…

Talk soon.

Lydia

Sam saw she’d attached a few pictures and clicked on the first
one to open it. A broad smile instantly popped onto his face at the
sight of Lydia and another woman on their knees, with two cute little boys
in costumes between them. The caption on the attachment read,
“
Jane, Ethan, Andy, and me”. He knew Jane was her sister, and that Ethan
was Jane’s younger son. Lydia talked about Jane and her family
often. Sam liked being able to put faces with the names.

Jane was as pretty as Lydia, but had a distinctly different look; she was more slender, had a more angular face, and long brown hair, not reddish like Lydia’s. But Jane had the same exact eyes as her
younger sister, the same shape and long lashes, the shade of golden
brown that seemed to glow and reminded Sam of expensive brandy. Lydia’s expressive, beautiful eyes had captivated him from their first meeting. He studied the picture, taking in the happy expression on Lydia’s face. Warmth touched his heart with soft fingers.

The second picture was of Lydia, Jane, a man that Sam assumed was Jane’s husband, since he stood next to her with his arm around
her waist. Four children were lined up in front of them, all in
costumes, three boys and a girl. They were all outside, in front of an attractive
brick house and trees that were multicolored with autumn glory.
“Andy, me, and the Aronson Family” the caption read.

In the third picture, Lydia held her son’s hand as the two of them walked down a tree-lined suburban street, looking at each
other and laughing.
Whoever caught that moment got a great shot
, Sam thought with approval.

The last picture was of Lydia alone; she stood under a tree, in her orange sweater and jeans, smiling demurely at the camera with one eyebrow arched, and holding a large yellow leaf to her chest. Sam felt his insides warm and a smile etch deeply onto his face. It
was a reminder of the day they’d met, when he’d caught a leaf just like that one as it blew towards them in the garden. He recalled the
wary
yet amused look on Lydia’s face as he’d held it out to her, an
offering…

He picked up his cell phone and hit speed dial, still smiling.
Lydia
picked up on the third ring, and before she could say anything
beyond a hello, Sam said, “I love these pictures. Especially the last one, the one with the leaf. You know why.”

Lydia laughed softly. “That leaf fell down right on my head! It made me think of you, of course. So I asked Jane to take that picture so I could send it to you.”

“That’s pretty cool. I love it. I’m going to print this picture out, if you don’t mind.”

“Seriously?” she asked.

“Yeah, seriously. You look beautiful.” He leaned back in his
chair, his eyes lingering on the photo. “I love this shot. The look on your
face, your hair flowing over your shoulders, the colors, the leaf—
everything about it.”

“Well, thanks,” she said, sounding self-conscious. “I’m glad you like it… that you like all the pictures. I’d hoped you would.”

“Your son is really adorable,” Sam said. “Except for the blue eyes, he looks a lot like you.”

“That’s the rumor,” she joked lightly. "The blue eyes are from his father."

“Okay. Woody costume, huh? Very cute.”

“Thank you,” Lydia said. “Yeah, he was super cute. He had so much fun, I was so happy for him. This was the first year he really
got
that it was Halloween, understood what was going on, you
know? The kids all had a ball.”

“You have a nice family there,” Sam noted. “Looks like you all had a good time.”

“Yeah, it was okay, considering,” Lydia said.

“Considering what?” Sam asked.

“Huh? Oh.” Lydia paused, the awkward pause of someone who’d slipped. “Um… well, guess who actually took that picture of my whole family?”

“Uh… a neighbor?” Sam guessed.

“I wish,” Lydia quipped. “No. My ex-husband. Matt came trick or treating with us. He called me the night before and asked if he could come. I was hoping he wouldn’t show up, but there he was at Jane’s door, right on time.”

“Ah. I see.” Sam rubbed his jaw and asked, “How’d that go?”

“Actually, not as bad as I thought it would. He wasn’t his usual sullen self, and he tried to be nice to everyone, even my sister. Andy was thrilled to have both of his parents there. What can I say? It was a glimpse of our future, I guess… having to deal with each other for Andy’s sake. We got through it.”

“Well, I’m glad it went smoothly, then,” Sam said. Lydia didn’t
usually talk about Matt with him. Sam was a bit surprised she’d
brought up any of it, but was glad she did. He took it as a sign that she was starting to feel more comfortable with him.

“Yeah. It was okay.” She cleared her throat delicately. “And, uh… he asked if he could take Andy for sleepovers once a month. I said we could try it. Starting next weekend.”

“Next weekend?” Sam couldn’t help but smile. “Oh really?”

“Yeah. He’ll pick Andy up at ten on Saturday morning, and he’s not bringing him home until six on Sunday night.”

“Clever woman,” Sam said approvingly. “Now you can, ohhh, I
don’t know, go into the city on Saturday and not have to worry
about rushing home, really have the day to yourself… I like the way you think, lady.”

Lydia released a shy laugh.

“I guess we should start talking about our actual plan for
Saturday,
then,” Sam said, getting up from his chair. He began to pace around his living room, as he usually did when talking on the phone. “Is that okay?”

“Yeah, absolutely,” she said. “Did you have anything specific in
mind?”

“A few things,” Sam replied. “You’re coming into the city at
twelve, right?”

“That’s my plan.”

“Okay, great. So…” Sam stopped at his window, looked out, and took an inner deep breath. “Would it be horribly forward of me to ask you to pack an overnight bag?” he asked gently.

Her voice was soft and sweet as she answered, “No. Not at all. I was hoping you’d suggest something like that.”

The corners of Sam’s mouth curved up. “Fantastic. We, uh… we’re on the same page, then?”

“Yes,” she said, quietly but firmly. “We are.”

He smiled, feeling elation and a twinge of lust soar through him.
Yesss
. But he continued casually, “Okay, great. So, I think you
mentioned you'd take the train into the city?”

“Yes.”

“Do you want me to meet you at the station?”

“You don’t have to, that’s not necessary… but on the other hand, I don’t really want to carry a big bag around with me all day.”

“Right. Hmm. Okay, then how about you hop a cab and come to my hotel? I’ll be staying midtown.” Sam started pacing again. “I’ll meet you in the lobby. We can leave your bag with the concierge and take off from there. How does that sound?”

“Sounds like a good plan. Which hotel are you staying at?”
Lydia went to get a pen and paper, and wrote down the information Sam
gave her. “Okay. So figure I’ll get there by twelve-thirty, at the
latest.”

“I’ll be in the lobby as of noon, just in case you get there earlier
than you thought you would,” he assured her. “Then, we can get a
light lunch, and hang out all afternoon.”

“Anything in particular you’d like to do?” she asked.

“Oh, several things…” The delicious thought of undressing her sprang into his mind. “But we’ll play it by ear, see what the weather
does, just see how it goes.” Something occurred to him and he
added, “Is there something specific that
you’d
like to do?”

“No,” she said. “If you have ideas, you can surprise me. That’d be fun.”

He smiled broadly. “You got it.”

“Great.”

“Later on, I’d like to take you out for dinner. How about sushi, do you like it?”

“I love it,” she enthused. “As long as it’s not one of those sushi karaoke places. No karaoke. Promise me.”

“You’ve never gotten drunk during a sushi dinner and done drunken karaoke after?” Sam asked teasingly. “C’mon, it’s fun! Talk about an icebreaker.”

She laughed. “I will gladly get drunk during dinner with you,”
she said. “But karaoke? No way. The thought of getting up and
singing in front of people makes me cringe from the inside out. I don’t like to be the center of attention, everyone looking at me.”

“Ah. Right. I remember.” Sam flashed back quickly to the
wedding weekend, where on the first night, he’d swooped in at the bar to get Lydia away from a drunken, overzealous admirer. It had almost
turned into a brawl, and Lydia had been mortified that everyone
there
was watching them, watching her. She’d all but ran out of the
lounge. “Alright, regular sushi joint, no problem. I promise. I’ll find a good one online and make a reservation.”

“Sounds like you have the day mapped out,” Lydia said. “So.
Meet
you at the hotel, have lunch, go play, have dinner… and then what?” Her deep voice dropped a bit lower, playful yet unmistakably
suggestive.

Sam felt his libido jump to life, felt the lust course through him. “I’m sure we’ll think of something. Hell, I’ve been thinking of things every day.” He liked flirting with her. “But I shouldn’t go into them over the phone. Don't want to get you all hot and bothered when I'm not there to do something about it. I’d rather just show you.”

“I can’t wait to see you,” she admitted. She said it so softly, he
almost thought he hadn’t heard her correctly. But he had. He
stopped his pacing, stopped short in the middle of his living room, and felt… something. Something he couldn’t name, but something compelling that pulled at his heart, mind, and body.