Willow (28 page)

I said nothing and he sighed.

“Amber and I made the decision to date each other today,” he announced. “I’ve been completely honest with her about how I feel towards you. She knows. There are no secrets.”

I stood there expressionless and he stood there looking exactly how I felt.

“She’s alone right now, having lost so much, and through all the years she has never questioned her feelings for me. I’ve cared about her since we were kids. I can’t let her down.”

My mind was swirling and my heart was screaming. Was he pointing out my previous indecision?

I started and then stopped. I couldn’t find the words. I never could when I needed them! The true ones wouldn’t come. I looked up at him and I knew he was waiting. I had to say something.

“I’m sure you’ll both be really happy.” I started to walk towards the front door.

“What kind of b.s. is this?” He said angrily. “Tell me how you really feel!”

I dropped my hand from the door and turned to him. “I can’t.”

“Bullshit!” he yelled. “Tell me the truth dammit!”

I opened my mouth to say something and I turned my head so he wouldn’t see that I was on the verge of tears. I was such a coward! I willed back my emotions so they wouldn’t fall down my face, then I turned to him once more. Our eyes were locked on each other. His glare was impatient and intense. I walked towards him and stopped.

I spoke the words I didn’t think I would ever be able to verbalize.

“Hold me?”

The ferocious glints in his eyes softened before he closed them. He reached for my hand and for a few brief seconds our hands revealed all there was to know. He pulled me towards him. My heart beat strong against his chest and I could feel his, too. I felt his breath on my hair and reveled in his tight grip. He wouldn’t let me go and I didn’t want him to. I didn’t want him to let me go ever. In that moment I was completely and devastatingly happy. And too soon it was over. The heat between us was interrupted by the chill of us separating.

“I want one final thing from you before I go and if you don’t give it, I’m going to take it because I know you want it, too.”

I reached up to brush a tear away and fought to control myself.

“I saw that,” he said.

I laughed through the tears. “You always do.”

The kiss that was meant for us had been interrupted by our shared understanding of what was right and what was wrong. The moment had passed. I felt an ache that nearly brought me to my knees. “You should go,” I said. “Go to Amber.”

Reece was resting near the railing and his arm was resting on the beam. He made a fist and leaned his head against his hand. Then he pushed himself off, turned away from me, and bounded down the stairs quickly and angrily. He turned to look at me before opening the door to his truck.

“It’s not over,” he stated with conviction. “But I’m going to do what’s right.” He  got into his truck and sat for a moment before driving off. When he did I whispered through my tears, “We never even started...”

Chapter 45

I stepped inside Anne’s house feeling completely different, more so than when I met the beast within. The girl in me was gone. In one day everything had changed. I had been here before. It was a painful truth I should have learned from before because now I had lost them both.

I had lost because I had kept so much to myself and didn’t speak the truth sooner. Love had given me so much but it had also taken so much away. Love made happiness but it also brought pain. I realized that love has the power to connect but only because it has the power to devastate. I had waited too long and kept too much to myself.

I only had myself to blame.

I folded Anne’s shawl and left it on the bannister as I made slow, burdened steps upstairs. As I walked towards my room I looked at Anne’s. Her door was closed. She was spending the night with Jericho. Pandora was gone, too. She was with them. I was alone. I always ended up alone.

I sat on my bed, picked up a throw pillow, and laid down on my side. That’s when they fell with abandon and I did not stop them. They would accompany me during the night and whenever I needed them to. So much lay ahead of me but it seemed like the steps to forever were so far away. All I could wonder is where would those steps take me? And who would they take me to?  Everything had changed. One decision had done that. And then another...

I closed my eyes and wept. My future was waiting for me and with resolve I was prepared to meet it.

Author Profile

Donna Lynn Hope
is an amateur writer who wrote this story for anyone who feels alone and is searching for belonging. You can contact her at
[email protected]
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There is something fascinatingly awkward about an author photo. I’m drawn to those glossy shots in the back of books, mostly because the subjects never look happy to be there.

- Pamela Ribon

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