Whispers of Moonlight (47 page)

When Travis didn't move or speak, Rebecca looked at him. In doing so, she couldn't pull her gaze away. Travis' eyes, tender with love, were pinned on her. Before she could think, Rebecca leaned toward him in invitation. However, she couldn't follow through. Travis had leaned as well, but just before their lips touched, Rebecca drew back, her right hand going to her neckline as usual. Travis froze, half-bent over her, his expression now sober and unreadable.

Only a few seconds passed, and before Rebecca could guess his intentions, he stood, plucked her from her seat, and sat back down with her in his lap. Unable to believe that he would actually force her in any way, Rebecca's eyes were huge as she stared up at him, literally frozen into stillness while he began to speak.

"There are a few things you need to understand, Rebecca," Travis began gently. "You see, when a man's wife wears glasses that cover her beautiful eyes, he dreams of taking them off." Rebecca couldn't move as Travis tenderly removed her spectacles and laid them on the other chair. "And when a man's wife wears her lovely hair pulled back all the time, her husband aches to take it down." A pin came loose under his fingers. "And
see it . . ." two more pins gave way, "long and hanging down her back." A moment later Rebecca's soft hair cascaded around her face and shoulders.

"And when a woman keeps her dresses buttoned up to her chin, and her husband knows how soft her skin is—"

"I get your point," Rebecca whispered, but Travis heard.

"Do you, Rebecca?"

She could only nod, her hand pressed as tightly as she dared against the buttons at her throat.

"I'm not so certain." His voice was almost casual now, and Rebecca started when he stood and placed her on her feet in front of him. The fire was to the side of them, and Rebecca watched as he leaned low and bent over her. "So there's no mistaking my feelings, Rebecca, let me spell it out for you." Again her eyes were huge. "If you're pulling your hair back so tight, and wearing glasses and shapeless dresses to repulse me, then I need to tell you something." His voice dropped to an intimate whisper. "It's not working."

She could have heard a feather land at their feet. Even the fire seemed to be holding its breath, but Travis wasn't waiting for anything. He'd had his say, and he had learned that with Rebecca he had to give her time to think. The hand that smoothed the hair from her forehead was gentle, and so was the kiss he pressed to her brow.

"Good night, love," he said to her ever so softly before turning and leaving the room.

Rebecca didn't know how long she stood next to the fire in the living room, but it did nothing to warm her. She was still trembling when she climbed into bed and lay looking into the darkness for most of the night.

"Where's Mama?" Wyatt asked as the sleigh started toward Boulder on Sunday morning.

"Lavena checked on her and said she was sleeping in. You boys were very good not to wake her."

"She didn't have breakfast."

"She will," Travis assured them. "She'll get up and eat when she's ready."

"Tomorrow is Christmas." Garrett fell the need to remind him.

"Yes, are you excited about it?" Travis asked because he didn't sound it.

"I don't think Mama shopped."

"No, she didn't," Travis said. "But we still have much to be thankful for."

"The baby Jesus," Wyatt said, well remembering what Travis had been talking to them about for weeks.

"Yes, God's Son came to earth. We are thankful about that, but there are other things too."

"Like food and the ranch."

"Yes, but other things as well."

"What are they?"

"I want you to think about it."

The boys made guesses all the way to Main Street, and their list grew, but Travis was looking for something specific.

"Did we guess right?"

"You did fine, but I want you to think about your room."

"Our bedroom?"

"Yes, and even what's lying around the kitchen."

"Toys!" Quick on the uptake, Garrett guessed first.

"Yes." Travis' voice was kind, but firm. "You want more gifts for Christmas, but you don't play with half the toys you have now."

"We're tired of them," Wyatt admitted.

"Well, maybe we should give them away so someone else can enjoy them."

There had been no scolding in Travis' voice, but they looked crestfallen, and the inexperienced father felt he'd handled it poorly. He stopped the sleigh by the church and leaned over them.

"I'm not getting after you for liking new things. There's nothing wrong with that, but you need to be pleased with what you have and not always wanting more." They were looking at him, but he could tell they couldn't quite take it in. Travis tried a different approach. "Would it be right for me to ask for another horse when I have Diamond?"

"No," Wyatt said immediately.

"I wouldn't ask for two horses," Garrett told him. "I would want only one of those—honest, Travis."

Travis had to smile. He was going to have to give them more time or find out from someone else how to handle this. Nothing he said seemed to spark their understanding, and it was time to get to church.

"Are you going to spank us?" Wyatt wanted to know, and Travis knew he'd really messed up. He put his arms around them, always amazed at how willing they were for his embrace.

"No, Wyatt, I'm not. I'm not even upset with you. I need to learn to be more thankful as well, and I hope we'll learn together."

He earned sweet smiles from each of his sons before he lifted them down from the sleigh. They were just making their way into the church when Travis looked up and spotted Lucky and family making their way through the paths someone had dug through the deep snow.

"Hold up a minute, guys." While Travis waited until Lucky approached, he noticed that Margo's features were a bit strained. He only prayed as he shook Lucky's hand and kissed Margo's check.

"Garrett, Wyatt, I want you to meet Lucky's wife. This is Mrs. Harwell."

"Margo, please, Travis," she begged sweetly.

"All right. Boys, this is Margo, and this is Sarah Beth."

The adorable little brunette in her father's arms smiled down at the boys, and they smiled back before ducking their heads shyly. The adults shared some smiles as well.

"It's cold," Travis said suddenly. "Let's get inside."

No one argued with that. It was a little bit late for people to be milling around, so the three adults and three children slipped quietly into a rear pew. Lucky and Margo both appeared nervous, and Travis prayed that the seeds of truth thrown out this morning would find fertile soil in the Harwells' hearts.

Rebecca stood in her room and told herself not to go back to the mirror. She hadn't emerged all morning, but now it was time: Travis and the boys would be home soon. She hadn't slept until the wee hours, so she hadn't even heard Lavena check on her, but when the housekeeper knocked several hours later, Rebecca told her she didn't want anything. She could hear the older woman grumbling as she moved back down the hall, but Rebecca had too many other things on her mind to give
Lavena's moods much notice.

For the fiftieth time her eyes went downward to the rounded but demure neckline of a dark green dress she'd chosen from her wardrobe. There was nothing daring about it, but she felt naked without buttons high up her throat. The dress didn't fit as well as it used to. She was larger in the hips, waist, bust, and even the arms, than she had been before she became pregnant. But it would do, or at least that's what she tried to tell herself.

As if she couldn't stop herself, she wandered back to the mirror. If it had only been the dress, that might have helped, but with the glasses safely tucked in her dresser drawer and her hair down her back, she felt exposed, like someone who had been comfortable in the dark and was suddenly dragged into the blinding light.

"Just stop it," Rebecca spoke softly to her reflection. "He's not going to attack you, and you know it." But she wasn't all that convinced. Indeed, she was trembling again as she adjusted the clips that pulled the hair loosely off her face and made herself move for the door.

Travis thought about Lucky and Margo all the way home. They had clearly enjoyed the service, and he'd been thrilled at the way people had come around to meet them at its conclusion. He knew the congregation would not let him down, but he felt responsible for Lucky, and, he admitted to the Lord, he'd been just a tad nervous. The kids had done fine as well. Sarah Beth had been a bit wiggly, but the children in front of them had been more so, and negative as this was, Travis believed that it helped allay Margo's fears. Her face had been strained until the sermon began, but at that point both she and Lucky had leaned forward in their seats to hear Pastor Henley.

The message had not been on redemption directly, but on the life of Christ and the way He dealt with the many people He encountered during His earthly ministry. Pastor Henley's point had been that Christ's message had never changed. He still expected His followers to give up ail for Him and pursue the peace that only He could bring. Travis wasn't certain how much of the sermon Lucky and Margo agreed with, or even understood, but he'd heard them tell Clayton Taggart that they would see him next week. Travis was still thanking God for this and praying for further opportunities for him and Lucky to talk, when the ranch house came into view.

"I'm hungry," Garrett proclaimed.

"Me too," Wyatt said.

Travis was brought up short. He realized now that they'd been talking to him and each other all the way home, and he hadn't even been attending.

"I'm hungry too," he said. "I'll tell you what. When we get inside, let's ask Lavena what we can do to help."

"Sometimes she doesn't let us touch."

"That's true, but I'll be with you and we'll ask
real
nice."

The boys grinned at his conspiratorial tone and were more than happy to double up on his back for a ride from the barn. Their giggles could be heard throughout the yard.

Lavena tried to look stern as they stomped their way into the kitchen, bringing snow in
with
them, but the sight of the boys laughing and clinging to their father was too much for her. She looked at them fondly even when Travis put them down and started his speech.

"We're all hungry and want to know what we can do to help with dinner."