When You Least Expect It (11 page)

             
“Crazy as it sounds, I do believe you.  I’m not going to pretend I think its right, but I think you’ve pretty much made up your mind.  I’ll try and be a supportive friend.  You do what you have to do.”  She let out a long sigh.  For the hundredth time, she wondered how she got herself in this situation.  Like it or not, she already was Ray’s friend and would never desert him when he needed her.

             
Ray was so relieved.  He wanted to shout from the rooftops, or do a little jig.  He wanted to get on his knees and thank God.  Instead he just answered, “Great.” He then started to apologize for his outburst.  “Amanda, I’m sorry…”

             
“Don’t even go there, Ray.  Thank you for being honest with me.  Truthfully, I’m glad you can share your feelings with me, although, they’re pretty intense at times.”  She laughed hoping to lighten the mood a bit.

             
“I don’t know how you do it, but you bring that out in me.  I’m usually a lot more reserved.  After that display, I’m beat.  I’m going to call it a night, if that’s okay.”  He was exhausted.  As much as he hated going back to the cottage, he needed sleep.

             
“Of course…sleep tight.  I’ll talk to you when you get back home.”  Amanda was tired, too.  This conversation had been way too intense.

             
“Okay…goodnight Mandy.”  Ray had such a hard time hanging up.  He hated to be cut off from her.

             
“Everything’s going to be fine.  It always is.  Goodnight Ray.”

             
She hung up the phone, praying that it would be.

Chapter 9

             
Vacation was over.  Everybody and everything fell back into their usual routine.  Carrie and Ray went back to not speaking and sleeping in different rooms.  The girls had gone back to their usual routines, school, play and pretending everything was fine.  Ray had gone back to work, determined to move forward.              

             
He’d started searching for a lawyer who could give him advice on his upcoming proceedings.  He had no idea how to go about it.  Should he just call and make an appointment?  Were there lawyers geared more towards the husbands?   Would he need a huge retainer?  He knew that he just had to buckle down and start somewhere.  He asked around and finally came up with a name.  Michael Mahoney.  He was reputable and had a very successful practice in Portland.  He was very nervous about calling him; it was finally taking that first step.  There were so many things to consider, number one being his girls…but he knew the rest of his life had to start somewhere.  He had made up his mind and there was no turning back.  He paced around his office, picking up the phone, hanging it up.  He paced some more.  Why is it so hot in here, he wondered?   Ray knew this was one of the biggest decisions he was every going to make. There was no other way to start; he picked up the phone and went for it.  He dialed the number.

~~~

              Amanda was due in court that morning.  With any luck, she’d be divorced this afternoon.  She hoped so.  Then she could get Peter out of her life, and move on.  She was very nervous about going by herself.  She’d even had a hard time deciding on what to wear.  She’d finally picked out black slacks and a simple light blue sweater.   She hadn’t seen Peter since the separation.  She wanted to look good, if only so that he could see what he had lost.  Of course, knowing him as she did, he probably wouldn’t even notice.  She didn’t know what she would say to him after all this time. Oddly enough, ‘hi, how ya doing’ seemed highly inappropriate.  She sighed audibly…God, was she dreading this!

             
   She had decided to forego an attorney since she couldn’t afford one.  She sat on the bench and tried to get everything in order to the best of her ability.  She needed a law degree to do this!  She hoped everything went alright, and there was no major delay because she hadn’t wanted to spring for an attorney. She had gone for a consult, and he had assured her, since everything, including the house, was in her name, he had nothing to ask for.  They’d split the debt, and that would be that. She waited for Peter, anxious to get this over with.  She hoped he had all his papers in order. 

             
“Hi”. It was Peter. “I guess it’s the big day.”

             
Amanda noticed how sad and defeated he looked, but chose to ignore it.  “I guess it is. I’m ready to get in line if you are”. 

             
He looked at her sadly, started to say something, but changed his mind.  “Let’s go.”

             
She turned her back on him, willing the line to move quickly.

             
The court clerk looked over their papers and said they seemed to be in order. Amanda could feel the relief escaping every pore in her body.  The clerk gave them a time to appear before the judge.  It was in two hours.  She was mortified.  She was definitely not spending two hours with Peter.  She could tell by the look in his eyes he was up to no good.

             
“Lunch?”

             
“No thanks.  I have some errands to run, so let’s just meet back here later. Don’t be late, please.” Knowing Peter as she did, she had no doubt he’d try to mess with her now. 

             
“I won’t be.  Is it too late to say I’m sorry?”

             
“No.  I know you are. So am I.  But it is what it is, so let’s just concentrate on moving forward, ok?”

She turned around and walked away.  She didn’t want to hear anything else.

              She fished out her cell phone.  She hardly ever used it to call him, but, didn’t see the harm.

             
“This is Ray”

             
“Ray, it’s me.  Are you busy?

             
“I’m never too busy for you!  What a nice surprise.  Aren’t you working today?”

             
“No, I had to be in court today.”  She knew this would alarm him, but now that he was on the phone, she was at a loss as to how to tell him.  Why hadn’t she ever told him before?  He was going to be upset, she just knew it.  She kept fidgeting in the uncomfortable wooden seat.

             
“Court?  What for?  Are you okay?  Are you in trouble, Mandy?”  Ray felt scared.  How would he help her from so far away? 

             
“No, Ray, I’m not in trouble.  Not really.  My divorce becomes final today.”  She felt herself shrinking into the bench. 

             
“Divorce…what divorce?”

             
Amanda could hear the hurt in Ray’s voice all ready.  She was so stupid.  “I’m divorcing Peter, remember?  It’s been the allotted time, so I get to sign the papers, see the judge, and get him out of my life forever.”

             
“So you’re there now?”  Ray was confused.  He felt as though he’d missed something along the way.  He thought she was already divorced.  Wasn’t she? 

             
“We’ve seen the court clerk, and I am just waiting to stand before the judge.  Peter went to eat, and I opted to call you.  I don’t remember telling you about this and wanted you to know.” 

             
“Mandy, I don’t understand.  Why didn’t you tell me?”  I assumed all this time that you were already divorced.  You never told me you were still married.  Were you hiding it from me?” 

             
“No Ray, not hiding it.  I just put it out of my mind.  I almost forgot that today was the final court date.  I told you I’d been married and recently separated.  I just hadn’t gone through the paperwork of the divorce yet.  Does it make a difference?”  She knew this was going to happen.  She could kick herself!

             
“I guess not.  It’s just weird to have you call me up and say, ‘hey, I’m at court getting a divorce’.  Forgive me if I seemed shocked.”  He was starting to get irritated.                “I’m sorry.  I know this is a lot.  I just wanted to talk to you.  It’s been pretty rough.               

             
“Do you think he’ll try to stop it, Mandy?” Ray asked as if reading her mind. “Will he do something to stop the divorce?”

             
“I hope not.  He said he wouldn’t.  I just don’t trust him.  That’s why I’m divorcing him.”  She really was worried, but she didn’t want him to know how much.

             
“I’m sure it’ll be fine, Mandy,” said Ray with more confidence then he felt.  “I can only imagine that this process is a difficult one.”  Ray felt like an idiot.  He wished he were there to help her through this.  He hated the thought of her sitting alone in the courthouse.  “I wish I were there, Mandy.”

             
For once, so did she.  “I do too.” 

             
Ray was shocked.  This was so unlike her!  She must be really stressed.  He decided to lighten the mood a bit.  “So, little Miss Innocent, you’ve been a married woman all this time!  You’ve given me nothing but flack about being married and here you sit…a married woman.  At least I was upfront about it! Shame on you!”  Ray laughed out loud.

             
“I was separated!  It’s not the same, Ray, and you know it!”

             
“Sure, uh huh, okay Mandy, whatever you say…”

             
“RAY!” 

             
Ray smiled in his office, feeling warm and mushy.  He loved this woman so much.  He wanted to help her and protect her from being hurt.  He wanted to hold her when she was feeling vulnerable, and make her laugh when she was feeling down.  He wanted to be there with her.  “I love you, Mandy.”

             
“I love you too…buddy.”  Amanda laughed.  “Or have you forgotten our deal?”

             
“Who, me?  Of course I haven’t.  I meant like a sister.”  Ray laughed at the absurdity of that line.  But it made her laugh.  How he loved to hear her laugh.  “Go get your divorce, honey.  Eat something, relax, everything will be fine.  I’ll try and call you later, when it’s all over.”

             
“Okay…talk to you later…and Ray?  Thanks for being so understanding.” 

             
“No problem, Mandy.  Thanks for sharing this with me.  Take care.”

             
Her sudden burst of love for Ray was almost overwhelming.  She hugged the phone to her chest.  “I love you,” she whispered to the dial tone.

             
                                                        ~~~             

             
Amanda walked into the courtroom and sat at the plaintiff’s table.  She didn’t look over at Peter.  She wanted to put this part of her life behind her.  The sooner it was, the faster she could move on to a better life.  She listened to the judge and waited for him to undo the marriage with his trusty gavel.

             
Finally, since there was nothing to argue over, Judge Jennings granted them their divorce.  She hurried out of the courtroom.  She didn’t want to have to talk to Peter anymore.  But that would have been too good to be true.  She heard running steps behind her as he grabbed her arm to stop her.

             
“Mandy, please wait.  It can’t end this way…at least we have to say goodbye.”

             
Amanda reluctantly turned around.  “I thought we said our goodbyes almost a year ago when we separated. Life goes on, Peter. I’m sorry it didn’t work, but now, it’s over.”

             
Peter just stared at her.  He had changed her.  “Yeah, you’re right. Take care of yourself, Mandy.”  He stuck his hands on his pockets and walked off.

             
Amanda sat down to give him time to leave. She willed herself to be happy it was over, but I guess mistakes are always hard to accept, even this one. Three years of marriage, down the drain. Not to mention all he had put her through before. But it was over, time to brush herself off and move on.  She walked out of the court house, head held high, ready to do just that.

Chapter 10

             
Amanda stayed in the hot shower for a long time.  She was emotionally drained.  So much had happened today and it was more than she could take in.  She tried to clear her mind of everything and just feel the hot water running down her body. 

             
She heard the phone ringing.  She decided to let the answering machine pick up.  She really didn’t want to talk to anybody anyway.

             
It clicked on.  “Hi Mandy, it’s me Ray…just wanted to see how you were doing after your big day.”

             
She lunged out of the shower and ran to the phone sopping wet and totally naked.  “Ray, wait, I’m here!”  She was gasping for breath.

             
“Hi. Just come in from running a marathon?”  Ray laughed at her.

             
“No, I was taking a shower and had to come out running.  I even forgot to stop for a towel.”  Why did she tell him that?

             
Ray was silent for a minute.  “Hmmm…that’s going to be a hard image to get out of my head.”  Ray told himself to stop trying to picture it.

             
“Oh, Ray, stop it. You’re making me blush.” 

             
Ray laughed.  “I can’t see you Mandy, so there’s no need to blush.”

             
“Yes, but deep down you want to see me, don’t you?”  She asked him coyly. 

             
Ray cleared his throat.  “Well, yes.  I’d like to see you.”  He changed the subject. “Speaking of which, when are you going to send me your picture?” 

             
“Oh I forgot!  Did you send me yours?”  She had taken quite a few pictures on vacation.  She was trying to have some scanned so she could send it via email.

             
“Yes, I have a couple picked out.  I’ll try to send them tomorrow.  But you have to promise to send me yours.”

             
“Ok. I’m trying to send them by email.  It should be in the next couple of days.  I have to admit, I’m a little nervous.”

             
“Why?  I’m sure you’re beautiful.  What do you look like?”

             
“Well, at the moment, I’m cold and naked.  Can you hang on?  Amanda giggled like a teenager.