What Now? (21 page)

She
fried a couple more for herself and finally sat down, by which time Nick had
practically demolished his.

“Thanks,
Shari. That was great. What time do you have to get to work?”

“I’m
fairly flexible, but I’m aiming to get there for nine thirty so that I can wrap
up what I’m working on quickly and then maybe show you a bit of Raleigh,
provided that we don’t get overrun by your fans.”

Nick
grimaced slightly. Sometimes he wished that he led a normal life. Sitting here
and eating breakfast with Shari felt normal and gave him more pleasure than
he’d had in a long time. He’d love to be able to walk down the street with her
or go shopping without being recognized and bombarded for autographs or photo
ops. He’d chosen this life and he didn’t know how to change it or if he truly
did want to change it. Looking at Shari across the table, he wondered how she
would feel about sharing it.

“How
do you feel about that?” Nick asked her.

“What?
Being swamped by fans?” He nodded.

“From
hanging out with you, I’ve realized that it’s not easy. It’s one thing to
observe what the celebrity life is like, but it’s quite another to live it.
It’s not always the glamourous life that people think.”

“Do
you think you could live it?” Nick persisted, watching her closely. She
wondered where he was going with this.

“I
could live with anything if I thought it was worth it.”

What did
that mean for him? Nick wondered. Would Shari think a relationship with him
worth the stress of living in the public’s eye? Or was a relationship between
them doomed before it even started? And what kind of relationship would that
be?

“Do
you think being with me would be worth it?”

“What
do you mean by ‘being with you’?”

“I
mean spending time together and getting to know each other better. See where it
goes.”

“We’ve
been doing that already.”

“Yes,
but I don’t mean for the documentary. I mean for us.”

Shari
looked at Nick. He seemed sincere and almost vulnerable as he opened himself
for possible rejection.

“I
think it would be worth it,” she conceded, opening her heart to possible hurt
for the first time in four years.

Finally,
progress, Nick thought with a smile.

“You
won’t regret it,” Nick assured her.

I
hope not, Shari thought.

There
was a hush as Shari and Nick walked into the offices of KZM Studios followed by
squeals from the women. So much for being professional, thought Shari. No
wonder Gerry had given the assignment to her. It reminded her of the Maroon 5
music video for their song “Sugar” where they’d crashed weddings across LA,
shocking the wedding guests into speechlessness before they erupted into
screams.

Journalists
and admin staff alike swarmed around Nick, taking selfies with him and group
shots. Shari shook her head in amazement from the fringes, glad that she had
never acted like that around Nick. The fact that she hadn’t was probably what attracted
him to her.

While
she was waiting for the selfies to be finished, her mind wondered back over the
morning. She was surprised at how easy it had been to sit down across from Nick
at breakfast. They could have been a married couple, except for the fact that
they’d slept in separate beds last night. Who would ever believe that Nick
Badley had slept at her house and nothing had happened? Well, nothing much, if
you considered his arousing kisses nothing much. She was glad that he hadn’t
pressured her to go any further.

She’d
always thought that he was not beyond redemption, now she was more convinced
than ever. The seeds were already there, they were just dormant. She’d do her
best to water them. She would never have guessed that Nick had once been on the
same path as her. She’d been quick to label him, but he’d proven that one label
could not adequately describe who he was.

“Sorry
to break this up, ladies, but I need to introduce Nick to Gerry.” They would be
there all day at that rate.

Gerry
was almost as bad as the women, gushing over Nick and thanking him for agreeing
to the documentary. Shari didn’t have the heart to tell him that Nick had been
totally against it at the start. It was during the Denver trip that he had
begun to cooperate more. She wasn’t sure if it was out of guilt for the way he
had treated her or not, but whatever it was she was glad because she was very
pleased with the way it was shaping up even before the piece with his family.

When
she explained to Gerry that she had come in to do some work on the documentary
before she showed Nick around, he shooed her out of the office and instructed
her to take the day off.

Shari
was happy to leave her work for another day and to spend the day with Nick. He
had to be back at his hotel by four o’clock to get ready to head out to the
airport where the private jet would fly them to the capital that evening as
they were doing a daytime concert the following day.

“What
do you want to do?” she asked him.

“I
don’t really care as long as it’s with you. I’d be happy to just hang at your
place.”

“You
can’t come to Raleigh and not do something. I’ll take you to the Museum of
Natural History and then we can go back to my place and make lunch. Can you
cook?”

“I make
a mean salad.”

Shari
laughed. Nick probably hadn’t cooked in ages. He could eat out every day if he
wanted to or hire someone to cook for him.

“OK,
I make a mean sandwich so we can have sandwiches and salad.”

“Sounds
good. OK, let’s go and do the duty tour of the museum.” 

Shari
slapped his arm for making it sound as if it was a chore.

“OK,
I admit that it was interesting,” Nick told her as they climbed into her car. 
They had just spent a couple of hours at the museum and he’d been surprised to find
himself enjoying the tour.

“I’ve
become a bit of a history buff,” Shari confessed. “It started when I did a
search of my ancestors and discovered that some of them had come from Barbados.
I bet you didn’t know that Charleston in South Carolina was founded by a group
of men from Barbados back in 1667? 

“No,
I didn’t.”

“I
grew up in South Carolina and I didn’t know that either until I did a history
course in college. When I started researching Barbados because of my ancestors,
I came across some of the architecture there and I was amazed to see how
similar it is to ours. Even today there are similarities, especially in the old
plantation houses.”

“I
remember you telling me that you have a mixture of Barbadian heritage and a
number of others.”

“Yes,
Barbadian, Italian, African American and Irish.”

“You’re
definitely all mixed up,” he teased her.

“We’d
make a good couple, then, because you’re definitely mixed up too, in your own
way.”

“I
couldn’t agree with you more. About making a good couple, not about me being
mixed up. I know that I may have acted like Jekyll and Hyde before. I even
wondered if I was bipolar, but recently I’m beginning to feel as if I’m not
vacillating so much anymore. Maybe I’m becoming who I really am.”

“Funny
you should mention Jekyll and Hyde because that’s who you seemed like to me –
one minute really nice and the other a real jerk.”

“Shari,
no one says ‘jerk’ anymore.”

“You
know what I mean.”

“Yes.
I guess I may still have my moments, but at least they’re less now. Sometimes
it can be pretty damaging to have everything you want. It can lead to arrogance,
which is why it’s so humbling to have you around. This is one time that I can’t
have what I want. Yet.”

Shari
looked at him briefly as she pulled into her driveway. “Delayed gratification
is a good thing,” she assured him.

“That
gives me hope,” he smiled, “because it means that gratification will come
eventually. But how long is eventually?” 

Shari
didn’t answer; she would let him work that out. After all, the ball was
definitely in his court.

“What
have you got in your fridge?” Nick didn’t wait for a reply as he went digging
through her vegetable drawer. “Lettuce, tomatoes, cucumber. Great! Have you got
any Kalamata olives by any chance? What about Feta cheese?”

He
located the Feta cheese, but couldn’t find any olives in the jumble of jars in
her fridge. She nudged him out of the way and located the olives near the back
of the top shelf and triumphantly handed it to him.

“You
didn’t look properly.”

“I’m
surprised you actually have Kalamata olives. They’re my favorite.” He rewarded
her for having some with a brief platonic kiss on the lips.

“Mine
too.”

“I’m
discovering that we have a lot in common. This is good.” He approved his
findings. Shari didn’t comment.

“Out
of the way so that I can find some stuff to make the sandwiches.”

“You’re
a bossy wench!” he complained.

“Wench?
You were talking about me saying ‘jerk’? Where did you even dig up that word
from?” She pretended to be offended. “Isn’t it an old English word for a
promiscuous woman?”

“Oh,
sorry; then you’re definitely not a wench. And I wouldn’t have it any other
way.” He turned back to peck her on the cheek. Did I really just say that? Nick
questioned his sanity. He wasn’t helping his case. Or was he?

“We’re
making progress, then.”

Nick
smiled at Shari’s comment. It sounded as if Shari wanted to make progress,
which was a good sign.

“Do
you have Greek dressing?”

“No.
I’ll make some balsamic vinaigrette in a minute.”

“You’re
a woman of many talents,” he praised, stopping to kiss the side of her neck.

Did
Nick know that he was driving her to distraction with these little kisses? Or
was this part of his strategy to weaken her and then move in for the kill?
Maybe I’m being too suspicious and he’s just the demonstrative type, Shari
thought. After all, she really didn’t know him that well, at least not that way.

“So
much for not mixing business and pleasure,” she murmured under her breath.

Nick
heard her and smiled to himself. He was enjoying cooking with Shari in her tiny
kitchen and he couldn’t seem to help himself from touching her in some way. Surely
she couldn’t be complaining about these chaste kisses. What would she say if
she knew what he really wanted to do?

In
the end, they ate their sandwiches and salad hurriedly as the time was fast
approaching for Shari to take Nick back to his hotel.

“Lily
will have my head if I make them wait again.”

“Don’t
remind me! I can’t believe that we spent an hour waiting for you because you
were in bed with someone called Cinnamon Brown. You truly are disgusting,
Nick!”

“I
was, Shari. I’m not anymore.”

“It’s
only been five days. Talk to me again in New York.”

“I’m
serious, Shari. I’m breaking the habit. I want you to trust me.”

“Why?
We’re not together or anything. You don’t need my trust.”

“I
want to be with you, so I
do
need your trust.”

“I don’t
know, Nick. I’ve got myself back together. I don’t need another heartbreak and
you have ‘heartbreaker’ written all over you.” So much for her saying it was
worth it just a few hours ago. Things tended to change in the light of day.

“Give
me a chance to prove myself, Shari. You can get to know me better at my parents’
and in Barbados. I really hope you can come.”

Could
she trust him with her heart? And what did he mean that he wanted to be with
her? Was he talking physically still or was he more serious? Surely he knew
that it was marriage or nothing with her. Did they even know each other long
enough?

She
enjoyed being with him last night and today, but she almost felt that Nick was in
a sort of cocoon, shut away from the real world. What would happen when he left
and was caught up in life on the road again? What would he do when the next
Cinnamon Brown offered herself to him?

She
pulled up at his hotel and parked. She felt confused with all the questions
going around in her head. She wished Nick would leave and give her space to
think, but, at the same time, she didn’t want him to go.

“See
you in New York?” Nick asked.

“Definitely.”

“I’ll
be thinking about you and what you said about giving back in some way. Thank
you for letting me into your life. It meant a lot to me.”

Nick
leaned over and kissed her gently on her lips before getting out of the car.

For
the first time, Shari felt that there was hope for them.