What Lies Beneath: Romantic Suspense (13 page)

“Yes, you can because I’m going to take care of you.” Theo brushed my hair out of my face. “You need to focus on what you can control. Take a deep breath and let it out. Then we’re going to walk to the car and drive back to your house. I’m going to take a look at your knee and then you’re going to bed. That’s all you need to do right now. Everything else will work itself out.”

“But it won’t…”

“It will.”

I could feel Theo’s heartbeat beneath my hand, strong and steady. How could he stay so calm? I felt like I was in the middle of a storm raging around me. At any second it could close in and destroy us both.

I stared into Theo’s eyes. My heart started to slow and match his steady beat. I nodded.

“Okay,” I said.

I still wore Theo’s coat. He wrapped it tightly around me, buttoned it up, then helped me to my feet. I stuck my hand into the jacket’s pocket and felt the switchblade knife. I ran my fingers over the length of it and thought of my arm. The scar looked old. Why couldn’t I remember where it came from?

24

I was lying in bed with Theo’s jacket wrapped tightly around me. I ran my fingers over the switchblade in my pocket again and again. When we returned home from the cabin, Theo insisted I take a pain killer then go straight to bed. I didn’t argue, but I was having trouble sleeping. I was afraid I’d wander off again. Theo said he wasn’t going to let me out of his sight, but I still worried. The last few days weighed heavily on me.

The scar on my arm itched furiously. Scratching it only made it worse; it was almost as if the source of the itch was burrowed deep beneath my skin.

I let go of the switchblade and rubbed my face. The pain killers left me foggy. When I tried to organize my thoughts I became confused.

I could hear Theo talking in the living room. Was someone here? His footsteps trailed down the hall to my bedroom. The door opened slowly and he peeked inside.

“You still awake?” he whispered.

“Yeah. I can’t sleep.”

“Do you want another pill?”

“No. They make me feel weird… like I’m detached from reality.”

I’ve been detached from reality for a long time, I thought sickly. I just didn’t know it until now.

“Who were you talking to?” I asked.

“The Devereauxes’ nanny. Bella wants Aiden to come over and play after school. I told her that was fine.”

“You told them that was fine? Are you crazy? Aiden can’t go over there. Did you ever think to ask me? He’s my son.”

Theo came into the room and sat down on the edge of the bed.

“I thought you were sleeping. I didn’t want to wake you up. You’ve been through a lot, not just these last twenty-four hours, but these last couple of years. I think the reason why you’re blacking out and seeing things is because you’re trying to remember. I think you want to piece things together, but you’re scared of what you’ll find. Imagining me killing Mr. Devereaux was a defense mechanism. You couldn’t handle being responsible,” he said. “Even though it was totally justified,” he added quickly.

I put my hand back into my pocket and touched the switchblade. The tension inside me eased.

“You don’t have to worry about Aiden’s safety. Mrs. Devereaux will be working at her store until late, then she usually heads into the city with one of her boyfriends.”

“What about Mr. Devereaux? No one will wonder where he is?” I asked.

“No, not for a while. They’re used to him disappearing for days, even weeks on end. He has mistresses everywhere. A couple weeks ago he said he was going out drinking with friends and didn’t come home until six days later. Mrs. Devereaux didn’t even bat an eye. It will be a while before anyone becomes suspicious which is good for us. It will confuse the timeline. No one will know exactly when he went missing or who he was with.”

“I don’t like Aiden staying over there.”

“I don’t either, but it’s less suspicious this way. Besides, I don’t think Mrs. Devereaux would ever do Aiden any harm.”

“You don’t think? That’s not much of an assurance. This is my five year old son we’re talking about.”

“I understand. I would never put him in danger. He’ll play with Bella for an hour or two then I’ll call and have the nanny bring him home before Mrs. Devereaux gets off work, okay?”

Reluctantly, I agreed. Theo was right; the appearance of normalcy was important, but how long would we have to keep up this charade?

Theo touched my leg.

“Does it still hurt?” he asked, meaning my knee. The pain killers took away most of the pain, but a dull throbbing still echoed through my leg.

“Okay,” I said.

Theo pulled back the covers and examined my leg. It was red and swollen. I was sure I’d done more damage to it since last night. Theo wanted me to go to the doctor but I refused. I couldn’t bear to answer the doctor’s questions. I’m sure he would have a lot of them. He’d explicitly told me not to do any physical activity. I was supposed to stay in bed. He would be upset I defied him and want to know why. I’m not a natural liar; I’m sure he would suspect something was up immediately.

A sharp pain shot through the scar on my arm. I jumped as if I’d been bitten.

“What’s wrong?” Theo asked.

“The doctor…”

“What about him?”

A memory flashed through my mind. The same doctor that treated my leg had examined the cut on my arm. I was alone with him in the exam room. He made Tom wait outside. Tom didn’t want to leave me alone- not because he was concerned, but because he didn’t trust me.

“I was supposed to keep the secret…”

“What secret?” Theo asked.

The memory was hazy. It came back to me in pieces. Tom and I were in the kitchen arguing. Suddenly, there was a knife in his hand. I remember the flash of the blade as it caught the light. Tom wielded it like a sword, slashing at me with it.

I put my hands up to protect my face. The knife cut across my arm and elbow. I fell to the floor in shock. Then Tom was tying a tourniquet around my arm and saying: “We have to get our story straight.”

“It was Tom all along,” I said.

Theo waited patiently for me to finish.

“He attacked me. He gave me this scar.” I lifted up my sleeve and showed it to Theo. “Afterwards, he said it was all my fault, that he hadn’t meant to cut me, but I’d run at him while he was holding the knife.”

Tears clouded my eyes.

“Saint Tom was anything but,” I said, trying to make a joke, but I sounded pathetic.

Maddie had been right about him being less than saintly. Did she know that he’d attacked me before? Were people in town gossiping about it? The thought made my skin crawl.

Theo wrapped his arms around me and laid down beside me. I rested my head on his chest. Our bodies curled around each other naturally as if we’d done this a thousand times. He ran his hands up and down my back slowly.

“Was it all fake?” I asked.

“What?”

“You were paid to get close to me. And now-”

“Sabine, my feelings for you were never fake. I wouldn’t use you like that. You’ve been through a lot, more than any one person should be asked to bear. When we first met, I knew what I’d been led to believe about you was false. When I was a detective, I handled a lot of homicides. After a while you start to see the patterns. The type of women who kill their husbands have a lot in common. They want money, or freedom, or-”

“Or they want to protect themselves.”

“Yes. Some of them are in abusive relationships. They think killing their husbands is the only way to protect themselves or their children, and some of them are right. It’s self-defense and I would never blame them for doing what they have to do to protect themselves or their kids.”

“You knew all along, didn’t you? You knew that Tom was abusing me. And you still helped me cover up what I did to Mr. Devereaux.”

“I don’t know if you’re aware of it, but Tom had a criminal history.”

I looked up at Theo sharply. Tom had been arrested once early in our relationship. He got into a fist fight with an art dealer who screwed him out of money. But other than that, he’d never been arrested- as far as I knew.

“No… when?”

“It was when he was in college. He beat up his ex-girlfriend. She had a restraining order against him for stalking.”

My stomach dropped.

“I had no idea.”

“No. It’s not usually the kind of thing creeps like to advertise.”

“How could I have been so blind?”

“It’s not your fault. Men like Tom know how to lie and manipulate women to get exactly what they want. These guys are predators.”

“How can you think I’m innocent? Half the time I don’t know what to believe about myself.”

“I think he was having an affair with Mrs. Devereaux. He went to meet her that night on the bridge. They fought and she killed him. She then manipulated her husband into helping her cover it up. It’s like he said, they would’ve lost everything if the truth had been exposed.”

“Jillian said she saw him under the bridge early the next morning.”

Theo nodded. “It wasn’t made public, but the police found a woman’s purple scarf on the shore of the river. It was downstream from the bridge. Apparently the wind carried it further than Mr. Devereaux realized.”

“You think he was there looking for it? Was Mrs. Devereaux worried about the scarf being linked to her?”

“She was. And in fact the scarf
was
linked to her. It came from her boutique. When detectives questioned her about it, she claimed to have never seen it before. When it was pointed out that it had a label from her store, she admitted they sold similar scarves, but she had no idea who’d purchased it. The detectives accepted her answer and never followed up.”

“They just let it go? How could they just ignore it? It was a direct link to Mrs. Devereaux?”

“Well, they weren’t sure the scarf was even related to your husband’s death. A lot of people picnic along the river. It could have been lost by any one of them. If the case ever went to trial, I’m sure her defense attorney would make that exact argument.”

“But they didn’t interrogate her?”

“No. They had no reason to. They didn’t know about her affair with your husband.”

I buried my face in Theo’s chest and sighed.

“I know it’s frustrating,” he said.

“I’m so stupid. I thought I knew Tom better than anyone. I didn’t know the first thing about him. It wasn’t until this morning that I remembered when he attacked me with the knife. How could I forget something like that?”

“You were traumatized. Believe it or not, it’s not uncommon for people to suffer from memory loss after trauma. It’s your minds way of protecting you from reality.”

“Even on this scale? I’ve forgotten so much.”

“When someone dies, people tend to have selective memories. They forget all the bad things about the person and focus on the good. It’s easier than accepting the truth.”

“What is the truth?”

“That humans are complicated. Most of us are shades of gray. I’m sure there were things about Tom that were good.”

There was an edge to Theo’s voice as if it annoyed him to admit that Tom could be good to me.

“But your relationship was abusive and unhealthy,” he continued. “It was toxic. You needed to get away.”

“You make it sound as if you’re happy he’s dead.”

“Maybe I am. A guy who attacks his wife with a knife then tries to convince her it’s all her fault, is not exactly the kind of guy I’m going to cry for at his funeral.”

I swallowed hard. How much more of Tom’s behavior had I forgotten? What if the knife was just the tip of the iceberg? Maybe Theo was right and I was lucky to be rid of him. I’ve spent so much time praying for a second chance. There were times when I would have gladly given anything to have Tom back, but that was before reality started to sink in.

I couldn’t think about it anymore. It was too much. Theo felt warm beneath me. I wanted to explore his body and forget all about the last twenty-four hours. I inched in closer, pressing my body against his. I wrapped my good leg around him, then kissed his neck. Theo kissed my forehead and wrapped an arm around me tightly.

“You should get some rest,” he said.

“I don’t want to rest. I want to forget.”

I slid my hand inside his pants and started to stroke his cock.

“Sweetheart,” he said, sounding strained, “are you sure?”

I bit his earlobe and stroked his cock faster. It was the only answer he needed. He rolled over on top of me. Our mouths met with greedy hunger. I wanted to consume him, to use the good in him to replace the bad in me.

I bit his lower lip and pulled. Theo groaned. It was a deep sound that echoed through my bones.

He pulled at my underwear, sliding them off. His mouth left a trail of kisses down my neck and across my chest. I arched my back and closed my eyes as Theo positioned himself between my legs.

I spread them wide for him.

I wanted him inside me so badly that my whole body pulsed with need. Heat radiated between my legs and up and down my spine. It was maddening. I wrapped my leg around his waist and dug my nails into his meaty shoulders.

Suddenly, he was inside me. Waves of heat played across my skin. It felt as if an electric current was passing over and through me.

I relaxed and let Theo take over. He lifted my hips and drove his cock deep. His thrusts came fast and hard, penetrating more than just my body. I gave myself over to him completely. Sink or swim, we were in this together now.

His hand found mine; our fingers twisted together. Theo stared into my eyes as he drove his cock into me again and again. I never wanted this feeling to end. The longer he was inside me, the more distance we put between our problems. An insane part of me thought that if Theo and I stayed together long enough, we’d emerge to find our problems gone. But it wasn’t meant to be.

Theo came inside me with a final, punishing thrust then fell to my side. Tremors echoed through my body. My fear and anxiety had diminished, but I could still feel them lurking beneath the surface. I took a deep breath and ran my fingers through my hair, twisting my curls into knots.