What it Takes (19 page)

I’ll think about it later
, she told herself.
Focus now. This is work.

She ran her fingers gently through Patrick’s hair and down his back as she returned his kisses with a new vigor. They leaned into each other and she forgot about the cameras. She forgot about Andy. She forgot this wasn’t real.

It felt real. It felt right.

No! No, it doesn’t. It’s not real. It can’t be right
, she thought, trying to force herself to focus.

Andy eventually moved them into the final position, lying on the bed. Patrick stretched on his back, Kelsey curled up against him, her hand and head on his chest and they pretended to sleep. He had his arm around her and she felt secure. She listened to his heartbeat and felt his chest rise and fall under her cheek. It had a calming effect on her nerves.

“Cut!” Andy finally called and Kelsey’s eyes popped open. “Great job you two. We’re done for the day, so you’re free to go. See you Monday.” He and the cameramen left as Kay entered the room with their robes.

Patrick helped Kelsey sit up then helped her into her robe as she held the sheet tight to her chest. Once she was ready, he put his robe on and slid his legs over the edge of the bed. He stood and looked over his shoulder at her with a smirk. Her cheeks turned a deep red as she looked down.

“By the way,” Patrick said. “I’ve never sent flowers to anyone but my mother.”

Kelsey raised only her eyes to him. His grin widened and he turned and walked quickly out the door.

She sat on the bed, her focus in the direction he had just gone as she replayed everything in her mind, from the conversation they’d had before the scene started to everything she’d felt during it and his final comment before he’d left. She couldn’t think straight for long. The love scene had left her in a state of arousal so urgent it was clouding her thoughts. She needed to take care of that before she’d be able to focus on more important things. She quickly rose and practically ran back to the wardrobe department, anxious to return to her trailer and be alone, all the while wondering if this was normal.

For Patrick, the first few minutes of the ride back to the hotel were torture. Kelsey wouldn’t look at him and it was driving him crazy. He wanted to talk about the scene. He felt he owed her an explanation, but, if he was perfectly honest with himself, he didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t sure she’d believe the truth; he wasn’t sure
he
completely understood it yet.

Still, he needed her to talk to him.

“So, do you think it’ll turn out okay?” he asked casually. “I mean, if it doesn’t, we may have to do it again.”

Her head whipped around and her eyes were immense. “What?” she asked on a gasp. “We won’t have to do it again.” She shook her head then stopped. “Will we?”

The panic he saw nearly stopped his heart. “No, Kelsey.” He grabbed her hand from her lap. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

She exhaled then turned back to the window.

Her hand was soft and warm in his, much like her body had been, under his, earlier. That thought sent the blood rushing to his groin. He squeezed her hand, and when she didn’t immediately respond, increased the pressure until she looked at him again.

“Why won’t you talk to me?” He rubbed his thumb along her knuckles. “Was it really that bad?”

Her eyes dropped to his mouth for a moment and he watched them darken. She closed them and shook her head. “No,” she answered slowly. She looked at their intertwined hands. “It just wasn’t what I expected.”

“What did you expect?” He slowly lifted her hand to examine her long slender fingers.

“It’s more about what I
didn’t
expect.” Her eyes followed her hand’s journey upward until she met his eyes over it. She lifted an eyebrow and an understanding passed between them.

“I didn’t expect that either,” he murmured. “Too bad we had to let it go to waste.” He kissed her knuckles and her mouth fell open on a silent exhale.

Kelsey pouted. “Are you trying to seduce me?”

He leaned closer, his smile grew. “Is it working?”

Kelsey eyed his lips, his very kissable lips. She moistened her own with her tongue. What was she thinking? Yes, it was working. But she couldn’t tell him that. She wasn’t trying to encourage him. She looked into his eyes. “Why?”

He blinked and leaned back. “Why?” he repeated, sounding confused by the question. “I thought I’d made my intentions clear. Or at least as clear as they can be.” He lowered their hands and slid closer. “You know how I feel about you. You must know.”

“No,” she answered and silently cursed her breathlessness. Inwardly she cursed more fluently at not knowing what she was denying. His feelings? Or her knowledge of them?

Patrick couldn’t possibly have known what that color combination on the roses was supposed to mean. He’d probably just picked them at random. She couldn’t accept that he was falling in love with her.

“No, your intentions aren’t clear,” she stated firmly.

“Let me make them clear for you then,” he purred.

She sat frozen, her heart racing, as he slowly leaned closer, his focus on her mouth. She should sit back. She should push him away. Her body tensed for flight, but she couldn’t move.

Before their lips touched, he looked into her eyes and stopped. Her eyes screamed her panic and he must have sensed that as he pulled away.

“Kelsey,” he started after a deep sigh. “I won’t do anything to hurt you.” He squeezed her hand one more time and let it go. “I wish you’d trust me.” He cast a last glance at her before turning his attention to the passing scenery.

Five minutes later, the car stopped in front of the hotel. They got out and crossed the lobby to the elevator. Kelsey chewed on her bottom lip. As soon as the elevator doors opened on their floor, she walked swiftly to her room. Without a glance backward, she entered and closed the door behind her, walked directly to the dining table, sat down, and slowly filled her lungs. Now that she was no longer near Patrick, she could finally think clearly.

She couldn’t make sense of anything anymore. Before the episode in the car, she’d been able to analyze away the feelings she’d felt in the heat of the moment. It was just like the kiss. She hadn’t been touched or kissed like that in so long that she’d been confused by it. It had simply been a temporary overload of emotions. In a matter of days, the emotions would go away.

She hoped.

She considered the roses on her counter and started to wonder about them again. She’d convinced herself he hadn’t known what the colors meant. Now she wasn’t sure. And, he’d certainly been excited today during filming. There was no way of hiding that, even if he’d wanted to. Veronica said that none of her on-screen partners ever got aroused.

But she’d known men like him her whole life. Men like Patrick Lyons didn’t fall in love, they fell in lust. Once that was satisfied, they moved on.

And where would that leave her?

Eleven

S
he couldn’t be alone with her thoughts. She could no longer trust them. After returning to her hotel room the day before, she’d only been able to contemplate the interaction in the car and the meaning of the roses for a few minutes before she’d called Veronica and asked her to go out. She needed to get away from the hotel and Patrick. She had to at least try to put him, and his proposition, out of her mind.

Spending time with Veronica had helped, but as soon as they’d stepped off the elevator, they’d run into Grayson and Patrick. Kelsey’s heart had immediately betrayed her and started to race as her body longed for his touch. Heat rushed all the way to her toes and back up again. Afraid someone had noticed her elevated color, she’d quickly excused herself under the pretext of getting her room ready for Veronica to join her for another girl’s night in.

Sleep, when it had finally come, had been restless. When she’d decided she could no longer try, she’d gotten up to go to the gym. She’d hoped that a workout would at least distract her from thinking about Patrick and her weakening will.

As she worked out, her mind raced. She could no longer deny that she wanted Patrick. She was having a hard time reasoning why she shouldn’t give in to what they both craved. Even a short-lived affair would be better than nothing. And if she went into it with no expectations, what could it hurt?

Except she knew that, for her to even be contemplating sleeping with Patrick, her heart was already too involved. Entering into a relationship with him could be tantamount to suicide—heartbreak far worse than what she’d experienced when Tim had left. How she knew that, she couldn’t say.

She’d been on the elliptical for half an hour before Veronica had finally shown up, yawning. It took Kelsey a moment to wipe the thoughts from her face before she was able to turn a bright, if brittle, smile on her friend.

“I was thinking we could go shopping today,” Kelsey said after Veronica had settled on the machine beside her.

Veronica quickly agreed to this as Kelsey knew she would. They’d discovered their mutual love of a good deal, and there was a great place, about forty-five minutes away from the hotel . . . and Patrick . . . where they could do some outlet mall shopping.

Kelsey was somewhat familiar with the area, so she and Veronica chatted about the shopping and other things they could do later. They were so engrossed in their conversation that they didn’t realize they were no longer alone until it was too late. Before they knew he was in the room, Grayson was standing between their machines, smiling.

“Good morning ladies,” he said with a slight bow of his head.

Kelsey gave Grayson a toothy grin that faltered when she noticed Patrick in the mirror. He was wearing a gym shirt that clung to his broad shoulders and was tight around his abs. His shorts were loose but gave her a glimpse of his legs, a part of him she hadn’t seen yesterday but had felt entwined with hers.

She felt a sudden hot flash at the memory as she met Patrick’s eyes in the mirror. One corner of his mouth turned up and she quickly looked away. She had to leave so she began to slow down.

“Good morning,” Veronica replied, staring at Grayson. “What’re you boys doing today?”

“Don’t know yet,” Patrick said as he approached. “You all were here early.”

Kelsey glanced at the screen, surprised that more than an hour had passed since she’d started her workout.

“She beat me down here,” Veronica said.

“I was up early,” Kelsey responded softly as she stepped off the machine.

Grayson immediately took her hand and pulled her to him, grinning mischievously. Her eyes widened slightly.

“What’re you doing?” she asked, casting a furtive glance at Patrick. He eyed the two of them suspiciously as Grayson twirled her in the tight space.

“I told you yesterday, we need to practice,” Grayson said and belted out a bad rendition of “I Will Always Love You,” swaying with her as he did. They all laughed at his horrible singing, including Grayson, which only made it worse.

Patrick caught her eye and Kelsey’s laughter died. The heat in his gaze, even through the frown, caused her heart to skip.

She gently pushed Grayson away. “I need a shower.” She stepped back and grabbed her towel. She walked toward the door and called over her shoulder, “Veronica, will you be ready in thirty minutes?”