What Endures (5 page)

“How long have I known Megan?” he asked. “’Cause I don’t remember her, even though I remember you.”

“You remember me?”

“I remember you and your mom moving in with us.” He looked at Tyler out of the side of his eyes. “And hating your guts.”

Tyler chuckled. “The feeling was very much mutual back then.”

“So if you’ve known Megan since you were kids, and I remember you as a kid, how come I don’t remember her?”

“She was off your radar then. You guys didn’t really meet until high school.”

Interesting.
He had quickly discovered that he seemed to have a knack for reading people. He sensed that he always had this knack, because he could recall instances as a child where he knew how to read his father enough to get out of yet another lecture or brow-beating about his athletic performance. He was very thankful for this skill now. It proved invaluable when talking to others, especially in his current condition, because everyone’s default setting seemed to be ‘tread lightly and don’t reveal too much.’

But the way Tyler seemed to hesitate when it came to Megan sent all sorts of warning flags up for him. There was definitely something more to the story. It was driving him crazy because no one seemed to want him to know that particular story.

“Really?” he asked, still trying to figure out a way to ask about Megan so that he’d get real answers, not filtered answers.

Tyler nodded. “Yeah, she even spent summers working in my mom’s shop.” Tyler made a face. “Actually the shop belongs to your mom now too.”

Jason looked at him in surprise. “Our mothers work together?”

Tyler smiled. “Strange, hmm?”

“So they’re friends?”

“Good friends actually.”  Tyler smiled. “Being one of Bruce Kincaid’s ex-wives apparently is a bonding experience.”

He nodded, but he was trying to sort through yet another fleeting memory. But this one, he couldn’t quite hold onto. “So how’d my Dad take it? I mean about our mothers working together and being friends?”

Tyler shot him a knowing look. “How do you think he took it?”

“That’s one thing I’m glad I can’t remember,” he said chuckling. Tyler smiled at him, but he could see the discomfort in his eyes. “Hey, relax man. If I can’t joke about losing a part of my mind, what else is there?”

Tyler considered his comment for a few seconds before he smiled. “You got a point.”

He shook his head. “Even as a kid I couldn’t understand how my Dad and you know, your mom and my mom could all. . .”

“Yeah, I know. It’s weird. It always has been.” He shrugged. “But it works somehow.”

He nodded. “So you, me and Megan?”

“What?” Tyler asked, sounding confused.

“Did we ever, you know, hook up with her?”

“Ugh!” Tyler threw his hands up in horror. “God, man! The mental image you just put in my head! What the hell?”

“What?” he asked. “You mean me and Megan?”

“How about the three of us?” Tyler shot him a disgusted look. “You do realize you and I are brothers right?”

“Stepbrothers, or ex-stepbrothers.” He groaned. “And I didn’t mean that!” Tyler was right. That image was disturbing. Extremely disturbing. He involuntarily shuddered. “I meant you know. . .Megan never. . .after all these years, she never. . .with either of us?”

“Dude, I told you. Megan’s like a sister.” He shook his head. “And as my sister, I try not to get a blow-by-blow of her sex life.” Tyler made a face that Jason couldn’t help laughing at.

“Megan’s like a sister to us?” he asked, forcing himself to sound nonchalant.

“She is to me!” Tyler exclaimed, still looking disgusted.

“What about me?”

“Uh. . .” Tyler paused and Jason could see the telltale signs that he was trying to spin the answer. He had seen this all too often now. And he hated it.

“Truth, man.”

Tyler sighed. “Look, Jase, sometimes the truth is hard to handle.”

“Especially for poor brain damaged me?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You know what,” he said, letting his frustration and anger take hold. “I’m so sick of everyone acting like I’m some sort of idiot who can’t handle things! I’m fucking sick of having people give me half-truths or tell me I’m not ready to hear something. I’m not ready?! It’s my fucking life! And I have a right to know about it! All of it! Not just what people like you think I should know!”

 “I’m just trying to-“

“If you say ‘help’ I swear to God I am gonna wheel myself over there and deck you!”

“I get that you’re frustrated man, but the doctor-“

“Fuck the doctor!”

Tyler stood up. “This is getting out of hand. I’m gonna-“

“Be an asshole?” He knew he was egging Tyler on, and unfairly at that, but all this pent-up frustration and anger needed a release and Tyler was the most convenient target. Besides, a part of him felt oddly satisfied yelling at Tyler. The feeling of them fighting was strangely familiar.

“You would know all about being an asshole.” Tyler threw back at him.

The sound of someone clearing their throat behind him stopped him from hurling another insult Tyler’s way. He turned and found Megan standing at the kitchen’s entrance, looking at the both of them with an expression he couldn’t quite read.

And despite the awkward tension in the room, he couldn't help but notice, again, how beautiful Megan Williams was. Her slender oval face, with those pretty hazel eyes shining with such relief, had been the first thing he had seen upon waking from his coma and that had been one hell of a way to regain consciousness. Since that moment, he couldn't stop thinking about her.

Even when he had been surrounded by caring, flirty nurses who could probably moonlight as models, the prettiest girl in the room to him had been Megan with her chestnut colored hair that fell in waves past her shoulders, her delicate face with the high cheekbones, small pert nose and bright hazel eyes that seemed to show every emotion. Unless she was guarding them, like she was now.

“Am I interrupting?” she asked coolly.

“No,” Tyler grabbed his book and headed for the door. “Megan.”

“Tyler,” she greeted him with a look of clear disapproval as he brushed pass her. Jason got a weird jolt of satisfaction at that, but that feeling quickly disappeared because Megan quickly turned that same look in his direction.

“Hi,” he said quietly, looking in her general direction but not at her. “Didn’t hear you come in.”

“I’m not surprised with all that yelling,” she said, her voice still calm.

“Yeah, about that, I-“

She held up her hands. “I’d rather not know.”

He studied her briefly and could see that she really didn’t want to get into the specifics of his argument with Tyler. “You don’t want to know why Tyler and I were arguing?”

She shrugged. “You guys are brothers. You’re bound to argue. I’d be more surprised if you didn’t.”

“And you don’t care?”

“As long as no one ends up in the hospital, no, I don’t.” She gave him a small smile. “I learned a long time ago that it’s best to let you two figure things out on your own.” She placed her bag on the kitchen counter and took the seat that Tyler had just vacated. “If you want to talk about it though. . .

Again, the feelings of frustration welled up inside of him. He had tons of questions, but it seemed like the bulk of those questions centered around her. And his relationship with her. His gut was telling him that there was something more to their relationship beyond friendship. But he didn’t know what that something more was.

“Why bother?” he said dismissively. “It’s not like I’d get the truth.”

He saw her recoil at his words and felt instantly contrite. And maddeningly, this irritated him even more. How was it that she seemed to have this effect on him? He snapped at people all the time. Not just of late. He could recall early instances of mouthing off at anyone and everyone. Whatever he had been like in the past 15 years, he was confident that he wasn’t a boy scout. Probably the opposite. So he was pretty sure he didn’t, or shouldn’t, care one way or the other when he let his temper and mouth run away from him.

But when he behaved around Megan that way, a part of him felt terrible, and an overwhelming need to apologize overtook him. What kind of friendship provoked these kinds of feelings? What kind of ‘sister-like’ relationship would? There was definitely something else, something more, to his relationship with Megan.

So why was everyone trying so hard to hide it? Clearly, they were on good terms now. So whatever had happened, it couldn’t have been that bad, right? Yet the secrecy was beginning to make him wonder if something awful had happened between them. What had he done that everyone seemed so intent on shielding him from? And he was pretty sure it was something he had done, since he knew he was prone to being an asshole and Megan seemed like the sweetest, kindest, most beautiful person he had ever known, even if he technically had only known her for a few weeks. The fact that she had enough patience to deal with both him and Tyler told him plenty about who had most likely been at fault in their past relationship.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked in an even tone.

“Just that,” he snapped as he mentally told that little chastising voice inside of him to shut up. “If I asked you something, would you tell me the truth?”

“Of course!” She sounded indignant that he was implying otherwise. “I’ve never lied to you, Jason.”

“Right,” he said, looking at her challengingly. “Then answer this question for me. What exactly was our relationship?”

“We were friends. We are friends.” Her answer was too nice, too neat. As if she were reciting a pre-written script.

“That’s it?” he challenged. “Nothing else? At no point were we more than friends?” There was that telltale pause from her. “Yes or no? It’s a pretty straightforward question.”

“Jason. . .“ She looked at him helplessly.

“The truth, hmm?” He looked at her angrily before he wheeled himself out of the kitchen and toward his room. But as angry as he was, a part of him realized that she had basically confirmed what he had suspected.  At one point, there had been something between him and Megan. Something beyond mere friendship. But what that was, he still didn’t know.

But he was determined to find out. Now, more than ever.

CHAPTER FOUR

One Week Later. . .

“So how long are you planning to avoid him?”

Megan stopped playing with the salad in front of her and looked across the table at Tyler. “What?”

“You heard me.”

“I’m not avoiding him. I’m over there every day. You know that, Ty.”

Tyler nodded. “You just happen to come over when he’s at physical therapy, or asleep, or at the doctor’s.”

She shrugged. “Our schedules are off.”

“Come on Meg,” Tyler said with a sigh. “You’re not fooling anyone. Least of all Jason.”

“Ty, I told you I’m-“

“He needs you, Meg,” Tyler said softly, but firmly.

“I know that!” she said, her voiced laced with frustration. “I know he needs me to provide for his care, and to handle all of the business stuff and I’m-“

“Not that,” Tyler said, shaking his head. “He needs you.
You
. He misses you.”

She didn't know what to say to Tyler. She missed Jason too, but after their confrontation, she just couldn’t face him. Clearly, he knew something had gone on between them, that she was keeping something from him. He would keep asking and she couldn’t tell him. Rather than repeat that confrontation over and over again, she had taken the coward’s way out and had started to ‘conveniently’ miss him during her visits to the house. She stopped by when she knew he wasn’t going to be there and left him things, along with short, impersonal notes. She hated it, but she just didn’t know what else to do.

“And I need you too, Meggers.”

“What are you talking about?”

Tyler grimaced. “Remember Jason before junior year?”

How could she forget?
That
Jason had been a world class asshole that she had wanted to kick in the nuts. And that was her restrained description of him back then. She knew now that he had been going through a lot of things at home so he had been acting out, but that didn't diminish the fact that he had been a mean-spirited ass. It was a miracle that she had talked to him, much less fallen in love with him.

Tyler hadn't been too fond of him then either, having borne the brunt of Jason's ‘acting out.’ Of course, both of them had come to realize that his asshole persona was a defensive façade, and Jason was actually a loving, caring and sensitive person. But she also knew that during times of stress, he tended to revert back to that asshole persona.

“Is he. . .?"

“He makes appearances,” Tyler said, still grimacing. “Frequent appearances. And this version is much, much worse Meg.”

“Worse?”

Tyler nodded. “Yeah, this one also has the whole brain-injury, frustrated-at-life and pissed-off-at-the-world part of him thrown into the mix too.” Tyler's gaze locked with hers. “You need to talk to him, Meg. Otherwise I’m moving out.”

“Tyler! You can’t just-“

“Meg, I love Jason. You know that. No matter what, he's my brother." Tyler held up his hands, his fingers curled like he was throttling something. "But my God! This past week has been like reliving my mom's marriage to Bruce. You know when I would fantasize about kicking his ass every day.”

“Is it really that bad?”

“Yes,” Tyler said simply.

She sighed. “Ty, you know he’s going through a lot. He’s-“

“I get it, I do. That’s why I’m sticking this out. That and because I know you need me to do this for you." Tyler shook his head. "And okay, I don't want to fuck up my karma by bailing on my severely injured brother but he’s. . .” Tyler sighed. “Difficult seems too mild a word for it. Ever since you started avoiding him, he’s gotten worse and worse. Ornery doesn’t even begin to describe it.” Tyler's expression was grave. “You need to talk to him Meg ‘cause I can’t stick it out much longer and kicking my severely injured brother's ass will fuck up my karma way worse than bailing on him.”