Up Close and Personal (21 page)

‘Yeah, he’s taken her into town to buy some new clothes. I did offer to go with them, but Connor said he wanted to go on his own.’ Nicole smiled. ‘Actually, I was quite pleased. I sometimes worry he’s not bonding with Tilly as well as he should be.’

Bear opened a cream enamel caddy and dropped teabags into two striped mugs. ‘Why do you think that is?’

Nicole shrugged. ‘Who knows? I think he finds it all rather wearing … You know, the shit and the vomit, the teething, the colic, the night-time feeds.’ She made a face. ‘Not that Connor ever bothers getting up in the night. He leaves that to muggins here. I’m averaging five hours’ sleep a night at the moment.’

‘You must be exhausted.’

Nicole sighed. ‘It’s amazing how you adapt.’

Bear placed the tea and cake on the table and sat down beside Nicole. ‘I expect Connor’s got quite a lot on his plate, hasn’t he, what with work and everything?’

‘Yes,’ Nicole said, picking up her tea. ‘Although he does seem to be an awful lot busier lately. We’re like ships that pass in the night these days.’

‘That must be tough.’

‘It is – especially since Connor doesn’t seem to be particularly interested in family life.’ Nicole stared into her mug. ‘He’s changed a lot since we got married. I wish things could be like they used to be between us.’ Then, realizing
she was in imminent danger of over-sharing, she changed the subject abruptly. ‘So how’s the article going? I can’t wait to read it.’

‘Really well, thanks,’ Bear replied. ‘The developer’s still refusing to go on record, but I interviewed the council’s Planning Services Director the other day. She reckons the badger sett isn’t active any more.’

‘But that’s ridiculous,’ Nicole said indignantly. ‘We saw the evidence with our own eyes.’

‘I know we did. But, unfortunately, I couldn’t tell her that because then I’d be admitting to trespassing. However, I did say I’d been in discussions with the Badger Protection League about the planning application and that they were very keen to inspect the site themselves. That seemed to put the wind up her.’

‘Good,’ Nicole said. ‘I’m assuming you didn’t tell her about the other wildlife we saw … you know, the
furverts
.’

Bear laughed. ‘Is that what they’re called?’

Nicole nodded. ‘According to Yasmin, half of Loxwood is shagging in the woods.’

‘Ah well, whatever turns them on.’ Bear broke off a piece of cake and popped it in his mouth. ‘Mmm … this is delicious. How did you know banana cake was my favourite?’

Nicole felt a warm glow of pleasure. ‘It was a lucky guess.’

The rest of the afternoon passed by in a flash and, before Nicole knew it, it was six o’clock. Bear looked genuinely disappointed when she said she had to go.

‘You’re welcome to stay for dinner,’ he said. ‘I’ve got a casserole in the pressure cooker. There’s plenty for two.’

‘Oh no, I can’t, I’m sorry,’ Nicole said. ‘Connor’s expecting me back.’

‘God, yes, of course,’ Bear said. ‘I was just being selfish. It can get a bit lonely on my own in the caravan sometimes.’

For a moment he looked so forlorn that Nicole wanted to reach out and hug him. ‘Well, any time you want to meet for a coffee …’ she said. ‘I’m pretty much free on weekdays – that’s if you don’t mind Tilly tagging along.’

‘Of course not. I love kids,’ Bear said, getting up to see her out.

At the door, Nicole stopped on impulse and kissed him lightly on the cheek. He smelled pleasingly of cologne and freshly mown grass. ‘Enjoy the rest of your evening,’ she said, scarcely able to believe her own daring.

‘You too,’ he replied. ‘I’ll be in touch soon.’

Nicole was smiling to herself the whole way home. She knew she was attracted to Bear, but it was only a harmless crush, she told herself; it didn’t mean anything. Married people had crushes all the time – and this wasn’t the first one she’d had either. There’d been that gorgeous bloke who sold organic goats’ cheese at the farmers’ market, the one with the floppy blond fringe and the dazzling smile. She’d bought cheese from him for weeks, practically lived on the stuff, and one night she’d even dreamed about him. About his strong hands. Had woken up in a hot sweat imagining them slowly undressing her, cupping her bare breasts …
Stop it, Nicole
, she told herself firmly.
Stop it right now!

While Nicole was getting to know Bear, Connor was making a home visit. The home in question was a stunning
oak-beamed barn conversion, complete with trout lake, guest annexe and two acres of secluded grounds. But instead of sitting beside a bed, tending the barn conversion’s poorly occupant, the GP found himself at the top of a ladder. Connor had never been very good with heights and now, as he looked down at the unforgiving flagstones below, he felt a distinct wave of nausea. Turning back to the house, he peered through the half-open first-floor window. Frustratingly, there was no sign of life on the other side. Connor was confused. He’d followed Zoe’s written instructions, hand-delivered to the surgery the day before, to the letter. Connor’s eyes flitted to the Audi, where he’d left Tilly asleep in her car seat, the passenger window slightly open, so he’d hear her if she woke up. He’d driven for miles before she finally nodded off and with any luck she’d stay that way for the rest of the afternoon. He would rather not have brought her at all but, with the surgery closed on a Saturday, the spurious shopping trip was the only way he could get out of the house without arousing Nicole’s suspicions.

Turning back to the window, Connor began rubbing his chamois half-heartedly against the glass – and then, quite suddenly, the genie of the lamp appeared. And what a foxy genie she was.

Zoe gave no sign that she’d seen Connor, didn’t even glance in his direction. She was wrapped in a peach towel and her damp hair was piled seductively on top of her head. She stood in the doorway for a few moments, posing languidly against the doorframe, showing off her beautiful body. A few seconds later she padded across the creamy carpet and sat down on the bed, drawing one foot up onto
the mattress so that the towel rode up, exposing her toned thighs and the inviting cleft between them. Connor watched with mounting excitement as she picked up a bottle that was lying on the bed and unscrewed the lid. She poured a generous amount of body lotion onto her palms and began massaging her left calf, throwing back her head as if she were being propelled towards orgasm by some invisible hand. After several minutes of this, she got up and walked across the room. When she reached the reproduction Louis Quatorze chiffonier, she reached up, as if she intended to pull open the top drawer. As she did, she took a deep breath, causing her chest to expand and the towel to loosen. As it fell to the ground, Zoe turned to face the window, hands on her cheeks, mouth pantomiming a wide O. This was the sign Connor had been waiting for. Without hesitation, he grabbed the edge of the window and pulled it towards him, creating an aperture wide enough for him to climb through. ‘You dirty bitch,’ he said, as he hooked one leg over the windowsill. ‘You’re going to get it now.’

15

Nicole was surprised when she arrived home to find the house empty. She tried to remember if Connor had taken a bottle with him. Tilly would be cranky if she missed her afternoon feed. Feeling a little anxious, she picked up the phone and called his mobile. When Connor answered, he sounded irritated and slightly breathless. ‘Don’t panic; we’re on our way home now,’ he told her. ‘What’s for dinner by the way? I’m starving.’

‘I didn’t have time to go to the supermarket,’ Nicole replied. ‘I thought we could get a takeaway.’

Connor sighed. ‘What have you been doing all day?’

‘Visiting a friend,’ Nicole said vaguely. ‘What do you fancy – Chinese or Indian? I’ll order it now.’

Connor thought for a moment. ‘Uh, Chinese. I’ll have a sweet and sour pork with special fried rice.’

‘Okay.’

‘Oh, and, Nicole, I’d give the prawn crackers a miss this time if I were you. Think of the old waistline, eh?’ The next moment the phone went dead.

With the jibe still ringing in her ears, Nicole opened the drawer where the takeaway menus were kept. She wished Connor would stop going on about her weight. She was tempted to abandon her romantic plans for the evening, but that would be defeatist. In any case, one of them had to make an effort or the thin threads that held their marriage
together would stretch to breaking point. And so, having placed her order at the Chinese, she went upstairs to shower and change into her new purchases.

Half an hour later, as she was in the kitchen, pouring gin into two glasses, she heard the sound of the front door slamming. ‘I’m in the kitchen,’ she called out.

As Connor entered, Nicole mustered her best welcoming smile. ‘Hi, darling,’ she said as he placed Tilly, still strapped in her car seat, on the kitchen table. ‘How did it go?’

‘Not so well. Tilly was really playing up.’ He nodded at the gin bottle. ‘Make mine a large one, will you?’

Nicole looked at Tilly, who was fast asleep. ‘She seems okay now.’

‘You should’ve seen her an hour ago. She wouldn’t stop crying. I thought my eardrums were going to burst.’

‘Did you try giving her a bottle?’

‘Yeah, but she didn’t want it.’

Nicole touched Tilly’s cheek to see if she was feverish. ‘Do you think she’s sick?’

‘Of course not. She was just being her usual cranky self.’

‘She’s teething,’ Nicole said defensively. ‘What do you expect?’

‘Hmm,’ Connor muttered, as if he wasn’t convinced. He went to the fridge for tonic and poured some into his own glass, but not Nicole’s. ‘Have we got any lemon?’

‘No, sorry. I’ll go to the supermarket tomorrow.’

Clucking in irritation, Connor picked up his glass and started walking towards the door.

‘Aren’t you going to show me?’ Nicole asked.

Connor stopped. ‘What?’

‘Tilly’s new clothes.’

Connor replied over his shoulder. ‘She hasn’t got any new clothes. You don’t think I was going to carry a screaming brat round the shops, do you?’

At that moment, Nicole could have quite happily picked up the gigantic, hand-thrown fruit bowl and thrown it at Connor’s head. Instead, she took in a big lungful of air and held it there for several seconds while she tried to summon up a shred of sympathy for her husband. ‘So where have you been?’ she asked. ‘Please tell me you didn’t dump her on my mother.’

‘No,’ he said, his voice heavy with a weary exasperation. ‘We’ve been driving.’

‘What – for two hours?’

‘Yes, it was the only way I could get her off. When she finally went to sleep, I parked up at the golf club.’

Nicole frowned. ‘You didn’t leave her alone in the car, did you?’

‘Of course not,’ Connor snapped. ‘What do you take me for?’

‘Sorry,’ Nicole mumbled.

‘My head was throbbing so I closed my eyes. The next thing I knew, I was waking up an hour and a half later. That’s why we’re back so late.’

‘I see,’ Nicole said tautly.

Connor took a slug of gin and tonic. ‘Is the food here yet?’

‘Yes, it’s keeping warm in the oven. I’ll just put Tilly in her cot and then I’ll serve up.’

Connor grunted something in reply and disappeared in the direction of the sitting room.

As soon as he was gone, Nicole lifted up a tea towel on the worktop to reveal a half-eaten bag of prawn crackers.
She tore the bag open and started cramming them into her mouth, one after another, until they were all gone.

They ate their takeaway in front of the TV. Nicole did her best to engage Connor in conversation, but he seemed engrossed in the quiz show they were watching, shouting out answers to the questions and whooping noisily whenever he got them right. When they’d finished eating, Nicole gathered up the plates and carried them through to the kitchen. As she stacked the dishwasher, she felt drained of energy, but she couldn’t go to bed, not yet. So instead she dried her hands on a tea towel, knocked back a second, much stronger, gin and tonic, and returned to the sitting room.

Connor was now sprawled the full length of the sofa. The quiz show had ended and he was watching an American drama series he’d been following for weeks. Without a word, Nicole picked up the remote control and turned down the volume.

‘Hey, what are you doing? I was watching that,’ Connor said crossly.

‘I thought we could make our own entertainment,’ Nicole replied. She stood over Connor and pulled the tie on her wraparound dress. It fell apart to reveal a black lace G-string and matching balconette bra, which only just contained her swollen, post-pregnancy breasts. ‘I treated myself to some new underwear,’ she said, striking what she hoped was a seductive pose. ‘What do you think?’

‘Very nice,’ Connor said, twisting his head for a better view of the TV screen. ‘Now can I watch my programme?’

‘No, you bloody can’t.’ Shrugging off her dress, Nicole
straddled him in one swift move. ‘It’s been ages since we made love,’ she said, running her hands over his pectorals.

‘That’s what happens when you have a baby,’ Connor said. ‘Sex goes out the window.’

‘But it doesn’t have to be that way,’ Nicole said, as she unbuttoned his shirt and bent over him, nuzzling her face against his chest hair.

‘What if Tilly wakes up?’ Connor said.

‘She won’t.’ Nicole turned her attention to his nipples. ‘And don’t try and tell me you’re feeling tired when you had a nice long nap this afternoon.’

She smiled as Connor’s hand reached for her left breast. They started kissing, and then his hand crept downwards.

‘Mmm, that’s nice,’ she said as he pulled her G-string to one side and began stroking her with a forefinger. Foreplay was something of a novelty for Nicole. Connor didn’t usually put much effort into the task. She got the impression that, for him, her body was like a village that over time had grown until it became a bustling town, criss-crossed with new roads and multi-storey developments, some of them rather unsightly. It had changed beyond all recognition, but it was where he lived so he’d had to make the best of it.

After only a couple of minutes, her breaths started coming quicker. ‘I want you inside me,’ she said, reaching for his crotch. To her surprise, Connor wasn’t erect. Didn’t even have a semi. Frowning, she rolled off him and took up a kneeling position on the floor beside the sofa.