Untamed (Vampire Awakenings, Book 3) (7 page)

Never once though had she had the urge to rip
Tristan's clothes off of him and have sex in a public place, never
once had she'd lost control of herself in such a way. At one point
she'd thought that she could love Tristan, she knew now that she'd
simply been blinded by his good looks, charm, and the fact that he
was the first serious boyfriend she'd ever had. Her parents hadn't
been overprotective of her, and though she'd been allowed to date
in high school, she'd never really met someone that she liked
enough to date for any length of time, let alone sleep with
them.

Tristan had broken down her defenses, had
woven a spell with his smile, his gifts, and his constant, caring
attentiveness. After a year together, she had walked in on him
having sex with another woman. That slap in the face had been bad
enough, but his dogged persistence at trying to get her back
afterward had spiraled into stalker-ish levels that had frightened
her enough she'd looked into getting a restraining order against
him. Then one day it had suddenly all stopped. She hadn't heard
from him in a year, she didn't even know if he was dead or alive.
Though she wished him no ill will, she was glad that she was
finally rid of him.

Looking back, she knew now that she'd never
been in love with him; she'd just liked the idea of finally having
a boyfriend. She'd been beguiled by him but more than that she'd
always felt like there was something wrong with her. All of her
friends dated with ease but she'd never really clicked with a man
before, never really had a big crush on someone. Then Tristan
started asking her out, and worried that she just might be some
kind of a freak, she'd agreed to go out with him after a month of
his persistent pursuit.

There had never been any ease to their
relationship, at least not on her end, she'd always felt like she
was forcing herself through it just so she could be more normal.
She hadn't been heartbroken when she'd found him cheating on her,
she'd been angry and felt betrayed, but more than anything she'd
felt relieved. She
finally
had a
reason to end it with him that wouldn't make her seem as if she was
crazy. Tristan had been the whole package on the outside, good
looking, pre-law, intelligent and caring. And she'd always had a
feeling of unhappiness while with him. Walking in on him with
another woman had actually been so freeing that she'd almost given
the girl a high-five. Instead, she'd simply closed the door and
smiled as she walked away from the room.

Yes, she was definitely a freak, she decided
as she shut the water off. A man she'd known for two days had more
pull over her than a man she'd spent a year of her life with. It
was crazy, but she found that she was ok with this kind of crazy if
it meant she would get a chance to talk to Ethan again, to kiss
him, and touch him.

Stepping from the shower, she grabbed the
towel and dried off before starting to dress. After Tristan she'd
decided to take a break from men. She'd taken some time to salvage
her beaten pride and to wash away the bad taste of Tristan's
endless phone calls, text messages, gifts, emails, random visits to
her dorm room and even her classes. Emma shuddered at the reminder
of him sitting in the back of her classes, watching her. The
feeling of his eyes on her was so vivid that she had to glance at
the window to make sure he wasn't standing there, watching her all
over again.

It had gotten so bad in the end that Jill and
Mandy wouldn't let her go anywhere alone, and though she had
resented the fact that he'd made it that way, she had welcomed
their presence. His final gift, a dozen black roses on her doorstep
and a note that said he would always love her and that she would
always be his, had convinced her it was time to get the police
involved. The paperwork for the restraining order was already in
the works when everything stopped, Tristan's room was cleared out,
and his roommate said he'd just packed up and left. At first she'd
been doubtful about that but over the months she had begun to relax
again and her life had gradually returned to normal.

And now her life seemed to have just been
thrown into chaos all over again. She'd never met anyone that made
her feel as unsettled, excited, and turned on as Ethan did. She'd
known Tristan for a while before she'd discovered his secrets and
mental issues. She barely knew Ethan and yet she was already acting
reckless and he was making her forget about her decision to stay
away from men for the time being. She had to be careful and tread
lightly here but she didn't know how to do that around him. He made
her feel as if someone had just thrown her into the deep end of the
ocean.

Emma stepped out of the room and hurried down
the hall to the kitchen but Mandy and Jill weren't there. Seeing
that the door to the balcony was open, she grabbed a cup of coffee
and poked her head out the sliding door to find Mandy lounging in
one of the chairs reading a book. "Hey," she greeted. Mandy placed
her finger in the book and smiled at her as Emma settled into the
chair next to her. Mandy's prosthetic leg was propped against the
chair beside her. "Jill still sleeping?"

"No, she went for a run on the beach."

Emma shook her head. "That girl has
way
too much energy."

"Far more than me," Mandy agreed. Emma
settled back in the chair and watched the people walking up and
down the street. "We didn't get a chance to talk last night."

"About what?" Emma asked as she took a sip of
her coffee.

Mandy gave her an, 'oh come on,' look. "Don't
think I didn't see you two steaming up the dance floor."

Emma was really beginning to hate her Irish
skin as she felt a blush creeping into her cheeks again. She hadn't
blushed this much since Kirby Jackson had pulled her skirt down in
front of everyone during the fifth grade dance. "Mandy..."

Mandy held up her hand to stop her words. "No
judgments. Just want to make sure you're ok."

"I am, I think," she muttered.

"He seems nice enough, but..."

"So did Tristan."

"So did Tristan," Mandy agreed. "You can't
spend the rest of your life being afraid of relationships, or
having that shithead hanging over you, but I also don't want to see
you get hurt again."

Emma blew on her coffee and twisted the mug
in her hands. "Neither do I."

"Where does he live?"

"Oregon."

"Not even close to you."

"Not even a little," Emma agreed.

"Would you be ok with only having a month? I
know we kid you about doing something casual to help shed the
memories of Tristan but you're not that person Emma."

"I know."

And truth be told she didn't think a month
would be enough time. At the end of the month, she knew she would
want more and more. Ugh,
she
would
end up becoming like Tristan if she wasn't careful. She sat forward
and placed her coffee on the table before getting to her feet and
walking over to the balcony railing. Maybe she could hide out in
this tropical paradise forever, never return home, and just pretend
she knew what it was that she wanted from her life.

She rested her elbow on the railing and
propped her chin on her hand as she watched the people strolling
the streets. It was much more peaceful now but she knew in a few
hours music from the bars would be going and the party would be
starting again. She'd drifted to sleep last night listening to the
music, laughter and shouts from the people still enjoying
themselves.

"You could come out to California to live
with us. Jill is still considering moving closer to Stanford or
trying to find a job in that area," Mandy suggested.

"I've actually been thinking about it a lot,"
Emma told her. "And not because of him," she rushed to get out.

"I didn't think it was," Mandy said with a
chuckle.

"It might be good to move out to the west
coast, at least for a little while. I'd like to do something
different."

"You might be able to find a teaching job,"
Mandy suggested. Emma wrinkled her nose and shook her head. "Or
something else. You'd at least have us though."

"That I would. For now I'm not going to
overthink everything and just roll with it when it comes to him,"
Emma said as she watched a child dart in and out of the crowd
toward one of the stores. "Maybe it will all end badly again, or it
will just end, but I'm willing to take that chance."

Mandy dropped her book on the table. "Well
let's hope that doesn't happen."

"He can't end up being like Tristan can he? I
mean I can't find two stalkers in life can I?"

"I don't know Emma, but I think the odds are
against it happening again, hopefully. Unless you're a psycho
magnet."

Emma released a small chuckle. "That wouldn't
surprise me."

"Me either," Mandy said with laugh. "I
can
say that I barely know the guy
and I already like him more than I ever liked Tristan."

That was easy enough to believe, neither
Mandy nor Jill had ever really liked Tristan. They'd thought him
fake and slimy, they'd thought he was overbearing even before he'd
started following her everywhere and leaving creepy gifts on her
doorstep, on her desk, and at her work. She should have listened to
her friends but she'd been a moron and determined to try to prove
to herself that she could have a normal relationship with a
man.

Emma shook her head; she stepped away from
the railing as the front door opened. Jill's excited chatter made
her frown as she craned her head to peer around the doorway. "Who
is she talking to?" Mandy inquired in a whisper.

"I have no idea," Emma told her as she
searched for Jill and whomever it was that she was speaking to.

"Come on in," Jill called over her shoulder
as she skipped down the steps. "Would you like a drink? I'm sure
Emma is probably up by now. I'll go get her."

Emma almost fell over when Ethan appeared at
the top of the stairs. He ran a hand through his sweat-slicked
hair, pushing it back from the broad angles of his face. The loose
fitting shorts he wore hung low on his hips, but it was his broad,
well-muscled chest that kept her eyes riveted. Her mouth watered,
literally watered, as her eyes ran over the carved muscles of his
abs. He didn't have a six-pack; oh no it was more like an eighteen
case. Muscles she hadn't even known existed bunched and flexed as
he descended the steps.

"I'll take some water," he answered.

Emma jerked back from the doorway and her
gaze shot to Mandy. "Who is it?" Mandy asked again.

Emma tried to calm the racing of her heart as
she placed her finger against her lips in a shushing gesture. 'It's
him,' she mouthed.

'Him who?' Mandy mouthed back.

'
Him
,' Emma
said and forced herself not to stomp her foot as she jerked her
head at the doorway.

Mandy's mouth dropped before she broke into a
grin that showed all of her teeth. Grabbing the arm of the chair,
the muscles in her forearms flexed as she lifted herself up. She
hopped over to the doorframe and poked her head around it. Emma
hated the unreasonable jealousy that filled her as Mandy's mouth
dropped open. She didn't like the idea of either of her friends
seeing Ethan in this state or lusting after him. Never, in four
years, had any of them ever fought over a guy. Not even when Jill
and Mandy had disliked Tristan had they been nasty or catty about
their feelings for him. They'd made their opinions known, but they
had never been mean and they'd never said, 'I told you so,' after.
There had only been unwavering support.

Mandy and Jill both had more experience with
men than she did. Mandy didn't have much more as she spent most of
her time buried in her books, and though Jill liked to bounce
through different guys, she would never go after someone that Emma
or Mandy liked. Jill was a flirt but she would never hurt her
friends. Even still, Emma had to take a deep breath to steady
herself and lock the green-eyed monster back in its cage as Mandy's
gaze remained riveted upon Ethan.

Mandy leaned back from the door and rested
against it as she fanned herself with her hand. 'Holy hotness,' she
mouthed.

Jill reappeared and handed a glass of water
to Ethan. "I'll go get Emma."

"You don't have to bother her if she's still
sleeping," he told her.

Jill just waved a hand at him before
disappearing down the hall. "Get in there," Mandy hissed at
her.

Emma looked at her helplessly; she was
paralyzed by her uncertainty and apprehension. If she stepped out
there now there would be no turning back. She'd barely been able to
separate herself from him last night. It was all moving too fast
and yet even as that thought swirled through her mind, she yearned
to go in there, to touch him again, to
kiss
him again. Heat coiled in her belly at the
thought of his kiss, her breasts tingled as she recalled the feel
of him against her.

No there would be no going back if she walked
in there now. She may very well end up with the broken heart that
Tristan hadn't been able to inflict upon her, but she so wanted to
take the plunge. If only her feet would move.

"Emma!" Jill's voice was tiny as it drifted
through the house.

Swallowing, Emma forced herself to take a
step forward. "Out here!" she called.

Ethan lifted his head to look at her as she
stepped into the doorway. There was a fiery gleam in his gaze as it
slid over her that caused her toes to curl as her hands clenched
before her. What was it about him that could make her forget
everyone else in the room? Even in her cut off shorts and loose
fitting tank top, he somehow made her feel as if she was the most
desirable woman in the world.

Ethan wasn't at all thrown off to see her
stepping through the doorway, he'd smelled her the second he'd
walked through the door and had known where she was. He wasn't sure
how she would feel about seeing him after last night, but just the
sight of her made his day better as the morning sun illuminated her
from behind. Her thick hair had been pulled into a loose knot that
rested against the nape of her neck. His gaze lingered on the vein
in her neck before moving over her body. Even in her baggy clothes,
she was the most enticing woman he'd ever seen.