Untamed (Vampire Awakenings, Book 3) (10 page)

She would
never
know about him though. She would run
screaming from him if she discovered the truth, like any sane human
would, and that was the last thing he wanted to have happen. He was
determined to enjoy the three weeks they had left together and he
wasn't about to let the knowledge of what he was push her away,
frighten her, or put her in any kind of danger. There were already
three other vampires roaming this island, he hadn't seen them
again, but they could become a threat to her.

From what Stefan had told him he knew that
some of his kind liked to hunt and kill other vampires for more
power. He hadn't sensed much of a threat from those three but he
wasn't willing to risk Emma's life, or the lives of her friends. He
would kill any one of them if they even thought about trying to get
close enough to harm Emma.

His gaze drifted back to her as she tapped
her chin with her index finger and studied the menu. The waiter
returned with their drinks, took their order and left. Emma's hair
shimmered in the glow of the candle, appearing more blond than
brown as the firelight danced over it.

"So Emma how is it that you're still single?"
he inquired.

The question startled her enough that she
sloshed the wine against the side of her glass. They'd had some
really enjoyable dates over the past few nights. Dates that had
involved talking about the music they liked, their favorite TV
shows, movies and books. They'd talked about their families and
friends but the conversation had stayed away from past
relationships, a fact that she had been more than happy about.

She forced a smile and took a sip of her wine
before answering. "I guess I'm just lucky."

He laughed as he leaned forward to grab his
whiskey. The ice clinked against the side of the glass as he took a
sip. "So no relationships for you, ever?"

He was trying to sound teasing and carefree,
but he could feel pressure steadily building within him. What if
there was someone else in her life? She didn't seem like the type
to cheat on someone, but what did he really know? She could have a
boyfriend back at home. Emma shrugged but for the first time her
eyes didn't twinkle and there was a new tension in her body, one
that he'd never seen before, as she'd become unbelievably
still.

"There was someone," she murmured and glanced
away from him.

He thought he might break his glass but he
couldn't get his hand to ease up on it. "Was it serious?"

"I'm not sure I ever knew what it was," she
murmured. "But it didn't end well."

"Did he hurt you?" Emma's eyebrows rose and
even he was shocked by the growling tone of his voice as he leaned
toward her.

"No, well I mean not physically. He kicked
the crap out of my pride though. At the time, I thought he broke my
heart, but I was never actually in love with him. I just tried to
convince myself I was."

"Why would you do that?"

Emma watched him as he sat a little away from
her again, and though he was trying to look casual his jaw was
clenched tight. "To seem normal I guess."

She felt like such an idiot as she tried to
explain it to him. Why had she been trying so hard to fit in back
then? Her parents had loved her no matter what. Jill and Mandy had
thought she was perfectly fine. She was the only one that had
thought something was wrong with her, but until Ethan she'd never
felt any intense attraction to a man. It still seemed a little odd
but she didn't question it anymore, not when he was sitting across
from her.

"He was my ah... my first..." her voice
trailed off as heat crept into her cheeks. "My first serious
boyfriend, my first
everything
, and
he was extremely charming. I was trying to convince myself that he
made me happy, he thought he'd like to sleep with other women."

"He was a fool."

She smiled again but sadness continued to
enshroud her. "That he was."

"I'm sorry you were hurt."

A small laugh escaped her. "The funny thing
is that I wasn't. I was so relieved that I finally had a reason to
call it quits with him that I pretty much did a happy dance all the
way down his hall afterward."

"Then why were you trying to convince
yourself that you were happy with him?"

She took another sip of her wine as she
pondered her answer, but the only thing she could think of to say
was the truth. Leaning closer to him, she rested her hand on the
table as she said the words she'd never said to anyone. "Have you
ever just felt like you don't belong?" she inquired. "That no
matter what you do, no matter how many friends and family you have,
that there's just something missing inside of you?"

Ethan felt as if she were looking inside of
him and seeing exactly what it was that he felt every day of his
life. She couldn't know the worst of it, but for the first time
he'd encountered someone that he was certain could understand the
emptiness that resided within him. "I know exactly what you
mean."

Emma searched his face but he didn't seem to
be trying to manipulate her like Tristan used to do. His words were
sincere, the bleakness in his eyes touched her in a way that
nothing ever had before. Without thinking, she took hold of his
hand. His fingers slid over hers as he rolled his hand beneath hers
and grasped it in return. Unlike with Tristan, unlike with anyone
else in her entire world, a sense of belonging stole through her
whenever she was near him and she felt as if whatever had been
missing inside of her had finally been found.

"I thought Tristan could make me feel normal,
that maybe a boyfriend was what I was missing, but I always felt as
if I had to force it when I was with him. It never felt right. And
he was a little unstable. I didn't know it while we were dating but
he had some issues that became apparent when I broke up with
him."

Ethan took another sip of his drink as he
studied her. "What kind of issues?"

Emma frowned as she tried to decide how much
to reveal to him. There weren't many people that were willing to
date someone that had an emotional basket case for an ex, but he
didn't seem like the type to run for the hills and she didn't see
any reason to keep it from him.

"He became extremely possessive after the
breakup, started following me, calling me all the time and leaving
me gifts. He even began to appear in my classes, classes that
weren't his. He would just sit in the back and watch me. His gifts
got steadily stranger, more disturbing and more terrifying. The
last one was a dozen black roses with a card that I swear was
written in blood and it scared the hell out of me. I finally went
to the police about him but he disappeared before anything could be
done."

Ethan had to keep his mouth closed as he
fought to retract the fangs that had extended while she was
speaking. He finally regained control of himself enough to talk
again. "You haven't heard from him since?"

"Not in a year and hopefully never
again."

Ethan nodded but rage still simmered beneath
his surface. That was a human he would gladly kill for frightening
her like that, if he was ever given the opportunity. He found it
odd that the strange behavior would abruptly cut off like that but
that kind of behavior wasn't something he could understand. Her ex
didn't sound like a very stable person, maybe he had killed
himself, or maybe someone else had done the deed.

"What about you?" Emma inquired though she
wasn't certain she wanted to hear the answer. "Any serious
relationships?"

"Nothing serious."

"Not the settling down type?"

He smiled at her over top of his glass. "I
just haven't met the right one yet."

"Do you believe there is a
right
one?"

For him it was a distinct possibility. "I
do."

"So is there a string of broken hearts left
behind you?" It wasn't the subtlest way of asking about how many
people there were in his past but she wasn't exactly skilled at
subtlety.

"None of those."

"I'm sure you've had lots of
girlfriends."

"Five and they were all aware that it wasn't
going to go anywhere before it started."

Emma frowned at him. He was gorgeous, she was
sure that a whole lot more than five women had thrown themselves at
him over the years, but he spoke of his relationships as if they
were business deals. "You make it sound like they were some kind of
an arrangement."

That's exactly what they'd been to him, but
that wasn't something she would ever understand. "Not really," he
replied. "We both understood in the beginning that it wasn't going
to be serious and that when it was time to part we would do so
amicably."

"How could you possibly know that at the
beginning of a relationship though? What if your feelings changed
over time?"

"I just knew that they wouldn't." She frowned
at him in confusion but he didn't know how to explain it to her,
didn't know how to make her understand without turning her away
from him. "You know how you said that it always felt forced with
Tristan, well that's kind of how I felt with them." It wasn't
exactly the truth. Due to the way he'd grown up he'd always known
about the existence of mates, and he'd known going in that none of
those women were that to him. "I was never going to spend the rest
of my life with one of them."

"Were they one-night stands? Never mind you
don't have to answer that, it's personal," she blurted after.

"I've never had a one-night stand," he told
her. It was something he felt she had to know as he had every
intention of continuing to pursue something with her. "That's not
my thing."

Her head tilted as a playful gleam lit her
eyes. "You're just a romantic at heart."

Ethan chuckled as he leaned back in his
chair. "I'm not so sure about that."

The waiter arrived with their food and though
he didn't require it to sustain him, in fact he'd never eaten human
food until very recently and only when he was around her, he still
picked at the contents on his plate in order to avoid her
suspicion. The raw steak wasn't overly bad, but it was the blood he
sought as he put it in his mouth. The bags of blood that Isabelle
had stocked didn't seem to be doing the trick quite as well as they
used to. It was Emma's blood he was thinking about when he consumed
the bags now. He could try and find another human to feed off of;
it might satisfy him a little bit more. The idea of doing that was
extremely unappealing to him though, and if it wasn't Emma he was
feeding from, he knew there was a chance he might kill them.

Emma glanced surreptitiously up at him as
they ate. She'd never met anyone like him. Most of the men she knew
were good guys; they didn't purposely set out to hurt people, they
weren't all nutball stalkers, but she'd never heard one of them say
that they entered into their relationships with the clear cut
understanding that it was never going to go anywhere. She also
didn't know all that many men that had never had a one-night stand
or hooked up before, but there was no reason for him to lie to her
about his past.

He was fascinating to her and the more she
learned about him, the more attracted to him she became, which was
something she hadn't thought possible. She could barely take her
eyes away from him as they ate their dinner, and if they hadn't
been in this restaurant her hands would be all over him. He lifted
his head and caught her watching him, but she didn't look away, she
couldn't. She was pinned by his gaze, swamped with the growing need
that was working its way through her body. She was finding it
increasingly difficult to breathe, let alone eat so she placed her
fork down.

"Would you like anything else?" he
inquired.

You,
she
almost said but she bit back the word and told him no instead. She
couldn't sit in this restaurant with him for a minute longer. She
felt like she was going to claw her skin off if she didn't get up
and start moving soon. A cold shower would be great but she didn't
think that was going to help her right now either. In fact, she
thought the only thing that would make her feel any better was to
be in his arms again. Their other dates over the week had ended
with a sweet kiss at the end of the night, there had been no more
instances like the one at the club, but she desperately craved his
hands on her flesh again,
now
.

Ethan paid the bill and walked around to help
her rise from her chair. He could feel the increased heat of her
body and hear the escalated pace of her heart. Recognizing her
rising desire, he couldn't resist touching her and brushed his
hands over her shoulders as she rose from her chair. Her breath
hitched in, her breasts rose against the confining front of her
dress. Her honeysuckle scent increased with her yearning, he could
feel it wrapping around him and drawing him irresistibly closer to
her.

The last thing he wanted was to meet up with
the others right now, he'd much prefer to take her back to her
house, but that was her decision to make. He kept his hand loosely
on her waist, his chest brushed against her arm as he wound his way
through the tables and people. They were almost to the door when
the sky opened up and a deluge of rain began to fall. He went to
hold her back but she was already stepping outside. He followed her
out the door and stood beside her beneath the overhang as the rain
pelted the ground around them in a loud crescendo that drowned out
the noise of the restaurant.

"It should be over soon," he said. "We can
wait inside."

The mischievous look she shot him over her
shoulder should have warned him, but he still wasn't expecting it
when she asked, "Why?" and stepped into the storm.

Disbelief and amusement filled him as she
tilted her head back and lifted her arms to the sky. Laughter
trailed from her as the rain falling over her plastered the deep
blue dress to her body. He could only stand and stare as she tilted
her head back to the sky. There was something about the picture of
her, laughing in the rain that made his heart clench, and caused a
strange warmth to spread throughout him.