Unmistakeable (2 page)

It was nice talking to him again. The conversation was natural and unforced. I missed being with him. I missed my friend.

“Can I get you something to drink?” he asked. “I’m having a beer.”

“Water, please.”

“Coming right up.” He walked away.

Scotty came to my side then looked at the finished piece. “Your side is better.”

“Don’t let your girlfriend hear you say that.”

He laughed. “She would slap me pretty good. And even though she’s small, she’s got a powerful smack.”

“I can tell.”

He nodded to his wall. “She painted that for me when we first got together.”

It was an image of a couple walking through a zoo, both eating ice cream cones. “It’s beautiful.”

“She managed to capture the moment when we fell in love—even though neither one of us realized it at the time.”

I kept staring at it, feeling the love shine through.

He patted my shoulder then walked outside and tended to the barbeque.

Ash returned to my side and handed me the bottle of water. “Did Scotty bore you to death about the painting on the wall?” He had a smirk on his lips.

“How did you know?”

He rolled his eyes. “He talks about that painting to anyone who will listen.”

“Because he’s proud of it. It’s cute.”

“No. It’s because he’s a girl.” He drank his beer then held it by his side.

“You showed me the picture your sister painted for you.” I gave him a pointed look.

“I guess I’m a girl too.”

I laughed then drank my water.

“I’m going to get some fresh air.” He stepped out the back door and joined Scotty by the barbeque.

It was like nothing had happened between us. We were friends just like we used to be. He didn’t bring up our relationship or what we could potentially be. I wasn’t sure if I liked it…

Livia came to me. “The food is almost ready. Can I get you anything?”

“No, water is fine.”

“Okay.” She walked away then carried the plates outside. The lettuce, tomatoes, and onions were prepared along with the cheese and condiments. And she had a plate of fries.

Ash kept talking to Scotty while he held his beer. He laughed a few times while Scotty flipped the burgers. Liam and Keira joined them. His arm was around her waist the whole time. I realized everyone was a couple except Ash and I. If we were, we would fit into this group perfectly.

I walked outside and joined them.

“How’s the studio going?” Scotty asked Keira.

“Good. We have a lot of clients now. I guess word of mouth really works.” She leaned close to Liam, who towered over her.

Ash didn’t look at me. He watched the barbeque and the smoke coming out.

Scotty piled the last of the patties onto the plate. “And dinner is served.”

“My sister still hasn’t learned anything from you?” Ash asked.

“Not stuff related to cooking.” Scotty winked.

Keira and Liam both laughed.

Ash cringed. “Too much info, dude.”

I laughed at the embarrassed look on his face.

Everyone started to prepare the plates. Ash grabbed a burger and a patty then handed it to me. “Ladies first.”

I felt warm inside. He made my heart flutter all over again. I prepared my burger then sat down at the picnic table. Liam was already sitting down, and when Keira approached, he pulled her onto his knee.

“People are around,” she whispered to him.

“I don’t care. This is where the fiancé sits.” He kissed her neck then ate his burger with one hand.

She rolled her eyes but she smirked at the same time. Then she took a bite of her food.

Scotty and Livia sat beside me. I noticed Scotty rested his hand on her thigh, gently massaging her. Ash moved to the seat across from me.

These were the most affectionate couples I’d ever been around. But it was obvious how much they loved each other. The guys stared at their girls with nothing but adoration, and it was obvious the girls loved every second of it.

I immediately thought of Ash. He used to look at me that way, making me feel beautiful even when I thought I was hideous. He took care of me in a way Jace never did. I suddenly missed him more than I ever had.

Ash ate his burger but didn’t stare at me.

I nibbled on my food, suddenly losing my appetite. I didn’t want to be rude so I ate it anyway.

Keira turned to me. “So, I hear you’re an awesome photographer.”

“I don’t know about that, but I am a photographer.”

“We need someone for our wedding. Are you—” She smacked Liam on the arm. “Would you stop grabbing my ass for just a second?”

He chewed his burger then swallowed it. “No.” Then he took another bite.

I tried not to laugh.

“Anyway…” She rolled her eyes. “Would you be interested?”

“Sure. But would you like to see my work first? I have a lot of samples but they are on my computer.”

“Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. How about you come over to our place this weekend and we can go over it then?” Keira asked.

“Sure.” It looks like I booked another gig.

Everyone finished their food then trailed inside before the mosquitos could get them. Only Ash and I remained behind. He continued to act like nothing was awkward, like nothing had changed.

I finished my food but didn’t take my plate inside, enjoying the silence. Crickets chirped in the distance as the sun disappeared. Eventually, only patio light kept us out of the dark. A swarm of dark bugs circled it, worshipping it.

“Having a good time?” Ash asked.

“Yeah. Everyone is great.”

He rested his elbows on the table and looked across the yard. “It’s nice to see you.”

“Yeah…you too.”

“While I have you alone, I want to talk about something.”

Here it comes.

“I’d really like it if we could be friends again. I feel like I lost one of the closest people to me and it’s not a good feeling. I don’t want you to avoid me every second of the day and I don’t want you to avoid me either. So, can we start over?”

That was the last thing I expected him to say, but I was grateful he did. “I’d like that.”

He smiled. “Good. I’m getting tired of taking out my trash in the dark.”

I snickered. “Yeah.”

“When did you take yours out?”

“After you left for school in the morning.”

He nodded. “Smart thinking.”

“Where did you do your laundry?”

“My parents.” He spun his beer bottle around his fingertips. “What’s new with you?”

“Nothing really. The photography is going well.”

“It looks like you landed another gig.”

“Good. I need to pay rent.”

He smirked. “Avoiding eviction is always smart.”

“What’s new with you?”

He shrugged. “Just school and clinical. Nothing worth mentioning.”

I wondered if he’d been sleeping around again. It was none of my business so I didn’t ask. When I looked at him, I just wanted to be held. His blue eyes were hard not to fall into, and I wanted to feel his warm mouth on mine again. My sister’s words came to my mind. Why couldn’t I have him without worrying about getting hurt? Why couldn’t Jace just dump me and let me go? Why did he have to scar me so bad?

“You okay?” he asked.

I was snapped out of my thoughts. “Yeah.”

“So…has Jace bothered you or anything?”

“No. I haven’t seen him or heard from him.” And I doubt I ever would. He seemed pretty happy when Sarah was sticking her tongue down his throat.

“Good. Let me know if that changes.”

“He won’t come around. He seems pretty happy.” There was a slight tinge of bitterness in my voice.

“His joy won’t last long. What goes around comes back around.”

I smirked. “I wouldn’t be surprised if that happened.”

“He’ll get his line snagged somewhere. There’s not a doubt in my mind.”

“Yeah…” Wishing him ill didn’t make me feel better, but I wouldn’t mind if something bit him in the ass.

He grabbed my plate and stacked it on his. “I’m going to hit the road. It’s getting late.”

“Me too.”

We dumped our garbage then walked inside. Liam and Keira were gone, and Scotty was pressing Livia into the counter, kissing her while he gripped her hip. Her hands were around his neck, holding him to her.

Ash cringed. “You would think they’d be sick of each other by now.”

I stared at them, longing for the same romance. “Leave them alone. They’re in love.”

“You can be in love when your brother isn’t around.” He walked out the door then shut it behind me. Then he headed to his car. “I’ll see you around.”
              “Yeah.”

He got inside then drove away.

I sat in my car, wanting to break down into tears.

CHAPTER TWO

Ash

“Our time together is coming to an end.” I sat at Mrs. Paleto’s bed side with her chart in my lap.

“Why is that?” Her voice was hollow and empty.

“My clinical rotation is ending. I’m going to emergency medicine.”

“Good. That’s what you wanted to begin with, right?”

Now I didn’t really care
. “I guess.”

“I’ll miss you, Dr. James. You’ve been my favorite medical student.”

I smirked. “You’ll still see me around.”

“I hope so.” She folded her hands in her lap. “How’s it going with that girl?”

I hated thinking about her. “There’s nothing going, actually.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I found out her boyfriend cheated on her. I told her about it and they broke up.”

She sat up in bed. “When did this happen?”

She seemed extremely invested in Alaska’s life. “Almost three months ago. I kept an eye on her and took care of her. She turned her back on him and never looked back. She’s better now. Still quiet, but better.”

“Did you tell her how you feel?”

I sighed. “I did.”

“And?”

I shook my head. “She said she’s not ready for another relationship. And she doesn’t think she ever will be.”

“Because of that jerk.” Her eyes were smoldering in anger.

“I’m not his biggest fan either. He was an idiot and threw away the most amazing girl in the world. Now I want her but I can’t have her even though I would treat her like a queen.”

“Don’t give up on her.”

“I’m not…but it’s hard.”

“Why?”

“She’s…complicated.”

She chuckled lightly. “I’m sure she is.”

“I’m trying to be friends with her, to get her to trust me that way. I know she feels the same way as me, so maybe in time she’ll come around.”

“That’s a good idea.”

I growled. “But it’s hard to be patient with her.”

“She’ll be worth the wait.”

“I know she will.”

“Does she know you love her?”

I didn’t bother hiding it anymore. Everyone knew how I felt. “No. That would just scare her off.”

She fell quiet, pondering her thoughts.

I checked her chart. “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the clot is starting to alarm me. The blood thinners haven’t been working and I can only give you so much. Therapy isn’t helping the swelling…I fear surgery will be the only option.”

“And if I don’t do it?”

I sighed. “You’ll be here for a long time, unable to walk or do any strenuous activity.”

She shook her head. “That’s no way to live.”

I couldn’t agree more.

“What about all the complications?”

She already had a weak heart and a history of a stroke. I wouldn’t recommend surgery unless I had to. “It’s risky.” I didn’t lie to my patients. They needed to know all the information before they made the decision. “With your medical history, there’s a possibility you may go into cardiac arrest on the table, lose too much blood, or the clot will move to your lungs anyway. I hate to be blunt but that’s the reality of the situation.”

“No, I appreciate your candor.”

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Patelo. I wouldn’t recommend the surgery, but if you do nothing—”

“I’m dead anyway.” There was no anger or pain in her eyes. Just acceptance.

It was experiences like these that made me dislike medicine. Why couldn’t I have been an accountant or something? “I wish there was something I can do.”

“You’ve done enough.” She patted my hand gently. “I’ll speak to my physician about it.”

“You’re going to do the surgery?”

She nodded.

“Okay.” I was scared for her. “I suggest you have all your things in order.”

“I know.” She sat up then reached behind her neck. She unclasped a gold necklace then handed it to me. “I want you to have this.”

I stared at it, unsure why she was giving it to me. “What is it?”

“It was my husband’s. It was the only thing he owned other than his clothes when he came to this country. He wore it every single day until he passed away. And now I wear it every single day.”

“I can’t take it,” I blurted. I leaned back.

“No, I want you to have it.”

“Why? You’re being premature about the outcome of the surgery.”

“That isn’t why. I want you to have it for another reason. Just wear it and you’ll realize what it is.”

I stared at the necklace, unable to grab it.

“Please. It’s very important to me.”

“I can’t take something that means so much to you.”

“Yes you can. And I want you to take something else that means so much to me.”

What?

“Take it, dear.”

“Why are you giving it to me?”

“You’ll see.”

Why was she being so vague?

She grabbed my hand then dropped the necklace inside. “Please wear it.”

I examined the gold pendant in my hands. It was etched with mountains in the distance and foreign writing was on the front. It was old and dented in some places. It was worn and had seen better days.

“Now put it on.”

I sighed then put it around my neck.

“Thank you. You’ve made me very happy.”

I didn’t understand why.

“Make sure you wear that around this girl.”

I cocked an eyebrow. “Why?”

She smiled. “It’ll bring you good luck.”

I didn’t see Alaska for a few days. Our schedules seemed to be the opposite of one another. It was hard acting like I didn’t care about her when I was head-over-heels in love with her. I wished she would just trust me. I wished we could be together.

I was trying to find an excuse to see her, anything. But that was hard to do. When Friday came around, I saw her come home just before dark. She had her camera bag over her shoulder so I knew she just finished a session.

I waited half an hour before I walked to her door and knocked.

She answered it, a smile on her face. “Hi.”

“Hey. You got plans tonight?”

“No…why?”

I held up the tickets. “I have two passes to the movies but they expire tomorrow. My friend Sage was going to come but he bailed.”

“Oh. What movie are you going to see?”

Whatever movie you want
. “The new sci-fi movie with Tom Cruise.” That was a shot in the dark.

“I wanted to see that.”

Score. “Cool. You ready to go?”

“Yeah.” She grabbed her jacket then pulled it over her arms. Naturally, I wanted to help her get into it but I refrained from touching her. We headed to my car and I opened the door for her. Whether she was my girlfriend or not, she was still a lady and I would treat her as such.

When we were on the road, I glanced at her. “Okay, DJ. What should we listen to?”

She opened my CD case. “Let me take a look.” She flipped through the binder while I drove. “You have an eclectic taste in music. You have rap, R&B, jazz, rock, bluegrass, and pop music.”

I shrugged. “I like everything.”

“I don’t see country in here.”

“Ugh, I hate country music.”

She snickered. “Me too.”

“Looks like we have something in common.”

She put
The Killers
on. “I saw them live a few years ago.”

“Cool. I bet they were awesome.”

‘They were.”

I parked my car then we walked inside the theatre. I purchased the passes earlier that day so I hoped no one recognized me. “Would you like something from the concession stand?”

“No. All that stuff is a rip off.”

I smirked. “You’re a cheap date. I like it.”

She flinched at the word ‘date’.

That was a rookie mistake. I played it off like it was a joke.

We walked into the theatre then took our seats. The theatre was packed on a Friday night. Couples were getting cozy together, and others were talking to their friends.

“How was your day?” I asked.

“Good. I had a baby shoot.”

“Was that difficult?”

“The baby kept crying a lot…but after they gave her candy it was fine.”

“I can’t decide what’s worse; cutting a baby’s hair or trying to take a picture of them.”

“I’ll take the picture any day.” She laughed.

The movie started and the theatre lights dimmed. Whenever I was close with her, I thought about touching her. I wanted to hold her hand, to feel her warmth with mine. How could I be friends with someone I felt such strong feelings for? Why did I fall for the one girl I couldn’t have? It would be easy just to go back to my previous lifestyle, but I didn’t want to feel that loneliness again. I just wanted Alaska.

When the movie was over, she grinned at me. “That was so good.”

“I liked it too.” I wasn’t paying attention most of the time. I kept glancing at her beside me, noticing her legs and petite wrists. I found her more entertaining than any movie.

When we were back in the car, she took the CD case out. “Now what shall we listen to?”

“I’m at your mercy.”

She flipped through the sleeves. “You have a
Shakira
CD?”

I grinned. “Hips don’t lie.”

She laughed loudly. “You’re so cute.”

I flinched at her words. After the shock passed, I felt the warmth inside.
She thought I was cute?

Alaska realized her mistake and hid her face.

Now we were even
.

We got back to the apartment building then walked up the steps.

“Thanks for going to the movies with me. I judge anyone who goes alone.”

“I go alone.” She slowly walked to her door.

“You do?” I cocked an eyebrow. I stopped outside her apartment.

“Yeah. You’re just sitting there in the dark, right?”

“Yeah, that’s true.”

“You should try it. It’s liberating.”

I stared at her, wanting to crush my mouth to hers. Her brown eyes always pulled me in. I wanted to stare into them forever, not having to look away. I wanted to come inside her apartment and kiss her until the sun came up. I didn’t want to be her friend. I hated it. “Maybe I will.”

“But if you do, I’ll judge you,” she teased.

“But if you saw me, that would you mean you were there too. So I could judge you back.”

“But if we’re both there, then aren’t we together?”

I smirked. “Touche.”

She tapped her skull. “I’m smarter than I look.”

God, she was so cute.
“That’s still up for debate.”

She rolled her eyes. “Don’t pick on me like your sister.”

“It’s a compliment. I only pick on people I actually like.”

“I’m telling Livia you said that, Ashley.”

“You did not just go there!”

“I did.”

I pushed her into the door then started to tickle her.

She laughed hard. “Not fair!”

I kept tickling her, moving to the skin over her ribs.

“Stop! I’m going to pee.”

I lowered my hands, laughing at the redness of her face.

“Phew.” She caught her breath. “I’ll never call you that name again.”

“That’s what I thought.” I stepped back so I wouldn’t be tempted to touch her. “Good night, Alaska.”

The sadness moved into her eyes. “Good night.”

I turned around and walked to my apartment, and it was the hardest ten feet I’ve ever walked in my life.

“She still hasn’t come around yet?” Livia asked from across the booth.

“No.” The distance was killing me. I took another drink of my beer even though I shouldn’t.

“I thought you guys would rekindle your romance at the barbeque with all the romance in the air.” She crossed her arms over her chest and huffed. “I guess peer pressure is dead.”

“We went to the movies last week.”

“Did that pan out?” She leaned forward.

“Yeah…that’s why I’m having a beer with you on a Saturday night.” I rolled my eyes at my sister’s stupidity.

Scotty smirked at my jab. He stayed out of the arguments I had with Livia, staying neutral.

“Then go hang out with her!” Livia was about to throw a tantrum.

“I can’t suffocate her,” I snapped. “She doesn’t respond well to pressure. I’ll have to take this slow and see where it goes.” I sipped my beer again then looked across the room. I used to survey the talent and pick someone to take home, but now I didn’t feel anything. The girls blurred together, meaningless.