Uniform Desires (Make Mine Military Romance) (44 page)

Nick saw the rosy beginnings of a new day creep through the windows and wished he’d pulled the curtains shut last night. He wasn’t done with the evening. He’d never felt this kind of intensity, been so completely addicted to anyone before.

He’d brought her back on top of him as he lay flat against the pillows, his arm under tucked back behind his head. Her head was snuggled up against his chin. Her arm has extended the length of his at the side, with their fingers entwined. Her soft body melted perfectly into his, her legs caught between his, her hip against his. She’d draped her other arm over the pillow next to his ear.

He smiled at how willing she was. How she threw herself into things, especially new things. Her appetite for sex was new, and yet she wore it like a glove that was made for her. He loved being tender with her, and yet couldn’t wait to push their boundaries, explore more of her body as her new world opened up. He was glad he was a part of it, at least for now.

Something inside him had shifted. He was standing in a doorway, saying goodbye to his lovely sister, and saying hello to Devon. He wasn’t sure where it would all lead, but being with Devon seemed so natural. It had happened so fast, but seamlessly. One minute almost sparring partners and the next lovers in one of the greatest nights he’d ever spent.

She’d honored him with her trust. God he hoped he could live up to that trust. Right now, all he wanted to do was spend the whole day in bed with her. And that wasn’t possible. There was lots to do if they were going to be organized enough that the guys could get everything accomplished in the few hours they had before Sophie’s closing sale.
 

Devon stirred. He probed her scalp with his fingertips, massaging her neck and back of her head. Her silky mahogany curls covered him. Her breasts pressed into him as she slept. She stirred and he felt her satin flesh brush against his chest.
 

He rolled his palm and felt her fingers cling to his. He massaged the back of her knuckles with his thumb. Small dainty hands, with red nail polish. What those fingers could do to him. He was a killing machine but could be felled by the touch of her fingertips on his body.

Bending at the elbow, he lifted his forearm and brought her hand to his lips. She arched and raised her head, reading his eyes.

Heaven help him, he thought as he looked into her eyes, he had fallen in love. It was more than a complication. It became something he needed more than just about anything else. The day brightened just seeing her smiling face close to his, feeling her body nestled against him.

They’d had little more than a few hours sleep, and he knew he’d pay for it later, but he realized it was nearly six and time to get up and get ready for the day.

“Glad you’re awake,” he said.

“But I’m not.” She kissed his sternum, moved over and laved his left nipple.

His fingers stroked her backside. He pressed his forefinger up her spine and she shivered.

“I want to stay in bed with you all day, Nick.”

He chuckled. “It is a wickedly wonderful thought, but honey, we have to get up.”

“Make me.”

“You mean to wrestle? Challenge my prowess?”

“I could never do that. I like that prowess. But I do like to fight.” She kissed his neck and scooted up, her delicious sex rubbing against his thigh, and he was only too happy to press her down to increase the friction. “Love wars. That kind of wrestling.”

“I like how you think.”

“I love how you feel deep inside me.”
 

Her eyes were lit with a low orange flame fire he could feel all over his body. He wanted her more each minute they were together.
 

She came up on her elbows, resting her forearms against his shoulders. The arch reaching up from her firm little bottom to her mid back was smooth, but his hands soon found their way to her rear as he squeezed her against his growing erection.

She slid one knee to the side of his thigh. He massaged her rump and guided her to cover his cock. Holding her gently by the waist, he lifted her up, positioned her for his penetration and slowly let her slide down the length of him.
 

She closed her eyes as he entered her. She bit her lower lip and winced. Her shudders of pleasure and pain spurred him on. Her lips had formed an open “O” as she rocked against him as he raised and lowered her without effort.
 

He realized he hadn’t put on a condom. He stopped.

Her eyes flew open as she looked down on him with concern. She leaned forward, positioning herself on her palms, and kissed him.

“Devon,” he said to her hungry lips. “I have no more protection.” 
“I don’t care.” She’d migrated to his neck and was kissing under his jaw, licking a tiny trail up to his ear.

“But you should care. We shouldn’t—“

“Shhh.” She put her fingers over his mouth, and then smiled, tracing his lower lip. She ground down on him, covering his mouth, seeking his tongue with her own.

“Devon,” he tried to say between her kisses. “This isn’t smart, honey.”

“I don’t want smart. I want you,” she whispered.

He stiffened, not sure he liked the implication.

“Right now, I want your cock, not your brains.”

God he was lost. Pinned by a little bit of a thing, and powerless to get her off him. His little brain was having a field day and would be celebrating soon. But something bothered him.

“Am I—” he thought better of it. The realization hit him that he cared for Devon, actually cared for her, while she was thinking he was her first lay. He’d wanted it to be special. Perhaps it was too special. Perhaps it was all in the act and not about caring for her.

For Nick, making love to Devon was an expression of his intense feelings for her. Not just her body, but also the real flesh and blood woman who’d captured his heart.

And apparently it wasn’t that way for her.

She was bouncing on his shaft, balancing herself with hands planted on his shoulders. In spite of himself, he arched up with each downward stroke she made, ramming deep inside her. As she orgasmed and pulsed all around him and he held back.

He doubted she knew the difference yet. In time, she’d recognize the signs. But Nick was having second thoughts about all of it. He’d been so hot to have her, he hadn’t thought about what was right. What was smart. What was worthy of a SEAL’s honor.

And this was not it.

Chapter 14

They’d showered and Devon used everything she had to get him to make love to her again, but Nick had retreated someplace she couldn’t reach. Putting it out of her mind, she decided he’d lighten up later on.

She thought it might excite him seeing her in that pretty little black dress she’d worn last night. When she turned around to have him zip her up, she expected his fingers to find their way inside the fabric to her front side, but he was chaste and just zipped her up, patting her shoulder when he was all done.

He avoided eye contact, too, as they finished breakfast in the downstairs courtyard. Engaging him in small talk was useless. He answered, but kept it clipped as if he was just walking through the motions with her. It finally began to bother her.

So, on the ride back over to Sophie’s, she decided to ask him. She’d made sure her dress was pulled high above her knees, and she crossed her legs. But he didn’t seem to notice and didn’t even take her hand like he had the evening before.

“What’s up, Nick?” she finally ventured. The long pause was worrisome. She reached over and grabbed his right hand from the steering wheel. “Did I do something wrong?” She placed his palm on her chest and made his fingers squeeze.

It didn’t help. He did smile back, but his eyes focused on their hands and not her face. He pulled his hand away and focused on the road.
 

“I think we might need to slow things down a bit, Devon,” he finally said.

She was shocked. She hadn’t considered this. Thinking perhaps she’d misunderstood him, she asked for clarification.

“Slow things down, as in you think I’m asking for some kind of commitment from you? Anything wrong with just enjoying the sex? I can handle
that
, if that’s your worry.”

It was getting worse. He almost turned green as he winced.
 

Great, just fucking great.

Then it hit her. He’d gotten what he wanted, and now he was “cooling” it down. The hunt was over. The rabbit was captured, the warriors had celebrated over a big bonfire. No more game, no more challenge. She was like yesterday’s news to him.

“Nothing to be mad at, Devon.”

Easy for you to say.
She glared back though watery eyes.
 

“What? What the fuck’s wrong with you?” he asked. His head was turning from the traffic back to her face repeatedly, annoyance showing in his tight jaw and lips in
 
thin line.

“You’ve been quiet and sullen all morning,” she started. “Not the Nick I fucked all night long.” She couldn’t help it. She wasn’t going to pretty up her words, since he’d already used the f-bomb. Her emotions were running the show now.

“That’s right. I’m not the Nick you fucked all night long.” He swerved, almost sideswiping an oncoming car.

“Something wrong with all that? Terrible timing for an attack of conscience. After you’ve gotten what you wanted.”

“Me? You mean after
you
did. In case you didn’t notice, Devon, you were the one directing things. All of it.”

“What? And you were an innocent bystander?”

“I supplied the cock. Remember? It wasn’t my brains but my cock you wanted this morning. I just figured that out. Thanks for the not-so-subtle hint. And, for your information, that was
after
you’d thrown yourself at me and you had me practically trapped. Pinned, as I recall.”

That comment made her laugh. “Wait until I tell Marc about this,” she said with evil intent.
 

“Don’t you fuckin’ dare.”

“Oh Marc, she seduced me,” she said in falsetto. “She doesn’t love me for me. She only loves me for how many times I can screw her in one night.”

He shook his head, mumbling something under his breath. “I knew it was a mistake to get involved with you. I should have listened to my brain and not my—“

In the span of three of four minutes they rode in silence while Devon realized that perhaps he was right. She’d been so focused on her first experience, she hadn’t considered him in the least. She’d lusted for the man in the iron body. She’d demanded he perform the consuming acts of passion with her that she’d dreamed about ever since childhood. And yet, she’d had no regard for him or his feelings.

She leaned back in the seat. “Oh, God,” she moaned. With her fingers over her forehead she allowed the tears to trail down her cheeks. How could she have blown something so beautiful?

And now he was totally turned off to her.

“Say something Devon.”

“I think you’re right. Maybe we went at this all wrong. It was a mistake.”

But her insides were shredding. If she’d known it would hurt so bad the morning after, she’d never have gotten into his bed in the first place.

She closed her eyes, telling herself that was the truth, but all she could see and feel were the colors of his flesh and the ripples in his arms and back, the taste of his kisses and how absolutely wonderful he made her feel.

Maybe it had been worth it, after all.

When they entered the house, Sophie glanced up at her looking years younger. She’d been cutting up fruit, sitting at the table, while Emma was folding clothes. Sophie glanced over Devon’s black dress and her eyes danced as she threw a look at her brother. In spite of her disappointment and pain, Devon found herself blushing and looking at her toes peeking from the sling-back spiked heels he’d so lovingly removed from her feet last night.

Last night!
Her stomach ached again. She still felt the tightness and swelling, reminding her how often and how intense their lovemaking had been. She squeezed her hands into fists and didn’t want to hear his explanation to his sister.

“I’m going to go change. Be right back to help out,” she said as she slipped into the guest room. With the door closed behind her, she heard the discussion in the front room.

“It was a date, Sophie, what can I tell you? He said in low tones.
 
We’re a couple of healthy red-blooded American horn dogs. Things happened.”

Sophie said something she couldn’t make out.

“She’s more than fine, Soph. I like her a lot. But I think we got a little carried away.”

“Who got carried away?” Devon heard Marc’s voice as she slipped off her dress and grabbed her jeans behind the closed bedroom door.

Don’t think about it, Devon. Get him, get the whole experience out of your mind until you can look at it later. In the meantime, pretend like it never happened.

She put on a red tank top and pulled her hair up in a clip, replacing her dangle earrings with studs. She added some powder and lipstick and a spritzer of perfume and donned her running shoes. They had a lot to do today and there wasn’t any time for regrets, or crying over things she could not control.