Twist of Fate (23 page)

The evening was turning out more pleasantly than she had expected. The salmon was excellent and so was the chardonnay. On top of that, Gideon was going out of his way to be a good host. Half way through the meal Hannah realized that she was doing all the talking. She closed her mouth in the middle of a sentence and eyed him thoughtfully.

“What's wrong?” Gideon asked.

“I just realized I've spent the whole evening telling you about my aunt's journals.”

“So? I'm enjoying it. I have a vested interest. Finish what you were saying about the women's cult of the goddess on Revelation.”

“Well, I'm just getting into it, but it's clear that my aunt recognized the cult immediately as the basic power structure for the islanders. Nord was obviously quite fascinated with it. She goes on for some length about it in her writings. The goddess was associated with the sea and with fertility. Only the women could appeal to her or ask her blessing. There was a special vessel used during ceremonies in her honor.”

“From that she assumes the women ran things on the island? I seem to remember that in her book she made a big point of interpreting all the customs as female oriented.”

Hannah nodded. “I've also come across some notes about my own ancestresses. This necklace has been in the family for generations, Gideon. It belonged to the relatives I told you about. The mathematician and the artist. It also belonged to a female member of the family who was a writer during the generation before the artist.”

“I remember. The women in your family who never married.”

“And who were very successful. Now the necklace belongs to me.”

“And you don't consider yourself worthy of wearing it because you're just a guidance counselor.” He grinned lazily and forked up another bite of salmon.

But Hannah took him seriously. “It's true, you know. The women who have worn this necklace have wielded considerable personal power of one kind or another. People like you take power for granted, Gideon. But I don't. Writing the definitive book on Elizabeth Nord would be a start in the right direction for me. It would give me a chance to do something important. Something that would make me successful.”

“You've said yourself, your talent is in guiding people.”

“It's a talent that people like you and Vicky Armitage don't take seriously.”

His grin faded. “You want to be taken seriously by Vicky Armitage?”

“Is there anything wrong with that?”

Gideon considered the matter. “Nothing wrong with it, I suppose. I've never met the woman, but offhand it doesn't sound like much of a goal.”

“You're laughing at me, aren't you, Gideon?” Hannah smiled wearily. “You see what I mean? You don't take me seriously, either. I would like to find a man who did take me seriously.”

“Hannah, this is nonsense. I don't know what got you off onto this chain of thought, but it's a sure-fire conversational dead end. You know damn well I take you seriously. Do you think I'd leave Tucson in the middle of this mess with Ballantine to take off on vacation with you if I didn't take you seriously? Do you think I'd be chasing up here to Seattle now, if I didn't?”

“It's not me you're chasing, Gideon. You're looking for some answers in your own life. Answers about the situation in which you find yourself with Ballantine. Answers about the mid-life crisis you seem to be battling. Business answers. Who knows? For some reason you think you might find some of those answers by hanging around me. But you won't.”

He watched her narrowly. “How do you know that?”

“Because I've stopped giving advice to people like you, Gideon. I'm going to concentrate on following my own advice.”

“Is that so?” he challenged. “Just what sort of advice are you feeding yourself these days?”

Hannah thoughtfully put her elbows on the table and laced her fingers together. Resting her chin on her folded hands she looked at him. “I'm going to stop worrying about other people and worry only about myself. I am not going to let either you or Hugh Ballantine use me. I'm going to make myself worthy of the necklace I'm wearing. I'm going to discover my own personal kind of power, Gideon, whatever it may be. And then I'm going to exploit it to the fullest. I have suddenly become very ambitious.”

S
HE WAS SERIOUS
. Just how serious Gideon was finally beginning to realize. Hannah was no longer interested in saving him or anyone else. She was concentrating on herself.

It came as a shock because in the back of his mind he'd known that the restlessness he'd been experiencing could be assuaged in Hannah's presence. The cure might be temporary, lasting only as long as he was with her, but it would bring some peace of mind. Perhaps he had come looking for the answers he already knew he couldn't accept. Knowing he couldn't accept an answer didn't necessarily keep a man from wanting to hear it.

“Just how ambitious are you, Hannah?” he asked.

“I don't know yet,” she said. “But every day lately I get a little more so. It's curious, Gideon. I feel as though I've just discovered something in myself, something quite useful, quite powerful. All I have to do is focus and aim it and live for it. It must be the same sensation that people such as you and Vicky Armitage take for granted. A kind of single-minded devotion to a goal. I've never felt so single-minded before. You're looking at the woman who changed her college major so many times she lost count.”

“But you eventually concentrated on a career,” he pointed out. “Guidance counseling.”

“I think,” she said musingly, “that guidance counseling was really a way of not having to choose a career at all.”

“That's ridiculous. Helping people is a skill, a talent you have.”

“No, I think in my case helping people choose different paths was just a way of making up for my own inability to choose a field and rise to the top.”

“Hannah, that's idiotic.” He was getting angry now, maybe a bit desperate. Grimly Gideon clamped a lid on his emotions. “I'm not suggesting that you shouldn't write this book on your aunt, but you're wrong to think that you've been wasting your life up until this point. What are you going to do? Go back to graduate school and get that damn Ph.D. in anthropology?”

“It's a possibility.”

“The world has enough anthropologists. Too many of them. Just ask any lost tribe that's tried to stay lost in the twentieth century. I'll bet a lot of anthro grads can't even find decent jobs.”

“I'll have an edge over most of them. I'm Elizabeth Nord's niece, remember? I now own her personal library. I can build on that. If I make a big enough splash with the book I'll be off and running. But I may not go back to school. I may decide to do this on my own terms and in my own way. There's more than one book to be had from Elizabeth's library. It's a treasure trove of information, not only about herself but about the people she studied. Any anthropologist or linguist who wants to do research on Nord or her writings will have to work through me.”

“I get it. You'll be the one in charge, the one with the key to the library. Hannah, think about it. Do you want to spend the rest of your life guarding her secrets?”

Her eyes widened. “When I decide how I want to spend the rest of my life, I'll let you know. If you're still around, which I doubt. I'm sure you'll be heading back to Tucson very soon. That Surbrook deal sounds as if it's getting hot.”

“Hot enough for Ballantine to try to bribe you with a piece of it.”

She smiled. “That bothers you, doesn't it?”

“Naturally it bothers me. The man's making a blatant attempt to use you. He tried to appeal to any lingering notion of revenge you might have and when that didn't work, he tried outright bribery.” Gideon struggled to keep the deep anger out of his voice. “By the way, what did you tell him when he asked if you were interested in revenge?”

“I told him the same thing I'm telling you. I don't want to get involved in the battle.”

Gideon shook his head once, impatiently. “You must have said more than that. Didn't he try to arouse some sisterly sense of protectiveness in you?”

“Unlike you, Ballantine didn't push. He asked his questions and accepted my answers.”

“What kind of answer did you give when he asked about our trip to Santa Inez?”

“He didn't ask about the trip. He already knew about it.”

Gideon inhaled deeply, a fierce sense of satisfaction fighting to take command. Ruthlessly he held it under control. “He knew we'd spent the time together? In the same house? That we had an affair down in the Caribbean?”

“I think it was a fling, not an affair,” Hannah said seriously.

“If he knew we'd had an affair,” Gideon pursued, ignoring her comment, “then what made him think you might still be in the mood for revenge?”

“He implied that by now I must realize you had taken me to bed only as a way of topping off your little victory over my brother,” she said easily. Too easily, Gideon decided. “He said you did things like that to add a fillip to your wins.”

“The bastard.” Gideon studied her intently, trying to see beneath the cool, flippant facade. “Did you believe him?”

“I thought he had made a logical assumption under the circumstances.” She reached for her wine.

“I asked if you believed him.” His anger was getting hard to control and he thought Hannah knew it. The knowledge didn't seem to bother her. He was beginning to wonder if she was enjoying herself.

“I don't see why it matters to you, Gideon, but, no, I didn't believe him. I've already decided that the reason you find me interesting is because you're trying to work something out in your own mind and occasionally I make a good sounding board. The victory over my brother was too minor, too unimportant for you to be bothered with trying to augment it by taking me to bed.”

He felt frustrated and stymied. She was sitting there, just out of reach tonight, baiting him. Gideon tried to take heart from the knowledge that at least she hadn't bought Ballantine's interpretation of the situation. But he sensed that he was fighting a losing battle this evening, and he was beginning to feel a little savage because of it. He had to find a way past the defenses she had in place. Gideon didn't question the necessity of finding a breech in the facade she had erected. He just knew he needed to do it.

“I'm glad you didn't buy what Ballantine was selling. He'll use anything he can to get at me. Using you wouldn't bother him at all.”

“I know. As you said, he's a lot like you.”

“Hannah! Damn it, do you have to twist everything I say? I have never used you.”

“Are you sure of that, Gideon?” Her eyes were almost wistful. He didn't trust the expression one bit.

“Of course I'm sure of it. The old business between your brother and myself had nothing to do with you.”

“You played games with me over it.”

He paused with a forkful of salmon and aimed the prongs at her. “No, Hannah, you tried to play games. I only went along for the ride. You're the one who came to Vegas and tried to maneuver me into agreeing to leave your brother alone.”

“I was out of my league with you, wasn't I?”

He shrugged and swallowed the salmon. “You're a guidance counselor, not a financial consultant.”

“As a guidance counselor I'm out of everybody's league. That's one of the reasons I'm getting ambitious.”

“Christ, you're getting paranoid.”

She nodded. “Possibly. I prefer to think of it as ambitious, though.”

He glared at the necklace around her neck. “You know, that thing gets uglier every time I see it.”

“I love it. I wear it with everything now. I think I'm ready to go home now, Gideon.”

His mouth hardened in frustration. He didn't know how to reach her verbally. She was beyond him tonight, dancing just out of reach and determined to stay there. That left only one other approach. “All right, Hannah, I'll take you home.”

The drive back to her apartment was made in silence. Gideon's rented Ford climbed the hills through the financial district, past the high rise office buildings. The rain was returning as a light mist, forcing Gideon to use his wipers about every third block. They crossed over Interstate 5, which cut through the heart of the city and then they were into the quieter neighborhoods of Capital Hill. Here, grand old brick apartment buildings reigned, their windows warm with light. Gideon frowned to himself, trying to remember the layout of the streets. He wasn't that familiar yet with Seattle. Many more trips like this one, though, and he'd soon know his way around. There was definitely a question as to how many more trips he'd get. He had to do something about that tonight.

He hadn't been able to reach Hannah with words, but he doubted that her body would let her forget what they'd shared physically. It had been almost three weeks now since they'd returned from the Caribbean. As far as he could tell there was no other man in the picture. Surely she must be a little hungry for him tonight in spite of her shiny bright facade of indifference. He sure as hell was starving for her.

Gideon found a parking space in the same block as Hannah's apartment and slipped the Ford into it with a skill he took for granted. Without a word he opened the door for Hannah and waited while she climbed out.

He couldn't just jump on her the moment she opened the door. Maybe she would give him the opportunity he needed by inviting him inside for an after-dinner drink. She didn't say a word as she walked beside him along the tree-lined sidewalk. Gideon decided he'd give a great deal to be able to read her mind at that moment. He was struggling for some comment to break the silence when he spotted her Toyota.

“Did they get it painted for you while you were down in the Caribbean?” In the street lights he paused to examine the vehicle.

“Yes. It looks decent again.” She fumbled for her key and kept walking.

Gideon had to take a few quick steps to catch up with her. The mist was getting thicker. Soon it would turn back into real rain. “Here, I'll take that.” He reached for her key as they walked into the entrance hall of the apartment building and started up the stairs.

“It's all right.”

“Hannah, for pete's sake, I'm supposed to open the door for you after a date. Let me have the key.”

“I said, it's all right, Gideon. I can manage my own door.”

She promptly stumbled slightly on the stairs, and Gideon reached out to take her arm and the key. He had both before she could protest further. At the top of the stairs he opened the door and pushed through behind her even as she was turning with a polite good night on her lips.

“Hannah,” he whispered, shutting the door behind him, “you don't want to send me away.” Gideon tugged her into his arms, determined to find the response he'd tapped that afternoon when he'd arrived. Once he had it he was sure he could build on it.

“I'm not interested in going to bed with you tonight, Gideon. If you've come all the way from Tucson expecting a casual roll in the sack, you've really wasted your time.”

“Nothing is ever casual with you.” She started to respond, but he cut off the cold words as he bent his head and kissed her.

She didn't actively fight him. Instead she merely remained passive beneath his attempts to find the answers he wanted. Gideon gripped her arms, pulling her closer. He could feel the soft thrust of her breasts beneath her dress and when he slid his hands down below her waist he found the lushness of her hips.

“Kiss me, Hannah,” he said against her mouth. “You remember what it was like between us. You can't have forgotten.” Gideon didn't wait for an answer. He moved his lips coaxingly on hers, urging her lower body against his. He wanted her tonight and he wanted her to know it. She had responded so beautifully to his need for her during their stay in the Caribbean. He couldn't believe she wouldn't respond that way again.

He had left Tucson convinced that in this one area, at least, their communication was almost perfect. Gideon had been certain that regardless of what passed between them on a verbal level, taking Hannah to bed was a sure thing. Once he had her in bed he could relax and give himself up to the satisfaction he found so easily with Hannah.

Slowly he felt her mouth soften under his. With a rising sense of relief and anticipation, Gideon tightened his hold. He flicked his tongue along her full bottom lip and then probed intimately between her teeth. She lifted her arms almost reluctantly to encircle his neck. Hannah didn't want to surrender, Gideon realized, but she was as much at the mercy of the passion that rose between them as he was. Triumphantly he groaned, cradling her completely against him. Memories of her lying nude beside him in the darkness had been haunting him for three long weeks.

She was responding more fully now, her body soft and pliant against his. Her tongue slipped delicately into his mouth, seeking to return the intimate, probing kiss. Gideon felt her shiver in his arms and took harsh pleasure from the knowledge that she was falling back into his hands at last. He should have taken this approach the moment he arrived that afternoon. All the talking at dinner had achieved nothing. The way to handle Hannah in her present mood was to take her to bed. Catching her gently by the nape of the neck, Gideon used his free hand to find the fastenings of her dress.