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The black truck pulls up front. Miles pushes me away, but his eyes lock with mine. “This is not the time to worry about me. I’m worthless to Dad, which means I’ll be fine. I’m dead serious. I don’t want to see you back here until I say so.”

“Okay.” I force myself to stand. It takes all my strength to leave my brother and run for Brady’s truck.

I hear Brady say hi as I slide into the truck, but I’m not sure if I say it back. I don’t even care that Seth’s there in the passenger seat, which is saying something. There’s just one thing on my mind:

Dad.

Some criminals are easy to root out. Not Jonas O’Connell. Dad’s the untouchable kind. The kind who does horrible things and gets away with it, even though everyone knows how bad he is.

I can’t stop thinking about that last night, the fury on his face, his final command. I know without a doubt he meant for me to kill Juan’s little girls. He didn’t care how I felt about it. I was a tool to him, and the sad thing is that I acted that way, too. Now that I’ve been without him so long, the fear of going back is paralyzing.

A hand waves in front of my face. “Fiona?”

I jump, realizing it’s Brady. “Huh?”

“Are you okay?”

“I told you she’d be pissed that I came,” Seth says.

Brady bites his lip. “This is your first time out, and I didn’t want you to get lost when I run off fast on my own. Seth knows the desert like the back of his hand.”

“It’s not that. I’m not mad. It has nothing to do with you guys.” Tears prick at my eyes. Ten minutes ago I’d have been excited to hear him say “first time”; now all I can think is that it’ll be my last, too.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Brady asks.

I stare at my hands, unsure. It’s not that I don’t trust them—they probably already have their guesses—I’m just not sure I want to get them so involved. But then again, Brady is good protection, and Seth is smart enough to come up with a plan. Except can I really be that selfish, using them like I’ve been used?

“No.” I take a deep breath. “I just want to run.”

Brady smiles. “We’ll do plenty of that; don’t worry. Running always takes my mind off crap, better than any medicine. I bet you’ll feel great by the end of tonight.”

“I hope.”

“You will. We’re taking you somewhere special.”

My ears perk up. “Special?”

His smile breaks into a full-on grin. “You’ll love it. It’s impossible to feel bad there. Trust me.”

Brady turns off the road and keeps heading into the desert. I bounce between them as we go over uneven ground. It’s dark before we stop, and when the headlights go out I can barely see. This area isn’t anywhere near the run-down buildings I stayed in, and I can’t see the town lights, either. With Brady going off by himself, I’m actually relieved to have Seth and his flashlight. It was considerate of him to think of that.

After a few stretches, we start at an easy pace to warm up. The air has cooled enough to make running nice, almost relaxing if I didn’t have to dodge a pothole every few seconds.

“What are these holes?” I ask through my breaths.

Brady laughs. “My fault.”

My eyes widen. “Really?”

“You’ll see,” Seth says.

“That’s why I don’t run in town. Even as a kid I’d make little divots. But I have to release all this energy sometimes, and out here I can lose control.” Brady’s smile looks sinister in the flashlight’s sparse beam. “Seth, you know where to meet.”

“Yup.”

The ground cracks when Brady takes off. I skid to a stop, barely able to believe my eyes. Brady is a force, like a mobile earthquake crashing its way through the desert. The earth still shakes beneath me, though his flashlight’s beam is already a ways off. I look down at the sizable pothole he just made, and Miles’s advice comes to mind. What would it be like to live with such a dangerous ability? Mine may feel awful, but at least I never have to worry about accidentally hurting someone.

“Pretty crazy, huh,” Seth says.

“Yeah.” It comes out as a whisper.

“Ready? Or do you need more of a break?”

I shoot him a glare I wish he could see. “I’m fine. Do
you
?”

He smirks, then breaks out running full speed. I follow his pace easily, and we run in silence for a long time. I stay behind Seth to avoid the potholes, trusting his swerves and directional changes.

Every now and then, the sound of Brady’s own personal thunder grows louder, but I can’t see his light. I wonder how far he’s gone, where he’s gone. He must know this desert better than anyone if he’s out here so much. No wonder they knew where to look when I hid from Graham.

My lungs burn, but I keep pushing hard. It feels good to get distance from the house, from what might be happening there. I feel like I can finally think clearly, maybe even form a plan. I’m safe for now, and Miles will be okay. I hope.

Suddenly I notice I’m next to Seth instead of behind him. Sweat beads at his forehead and around his neck, making the ends of his hair curl. He glances over. “Need a break?”

“Why do you keep asking that?”

He stops and leans one hand on his knee. “Maybe because you’re killing me, and I don’t want to admit it.”

“Oh.” I walk back to him. Now that I’ve stopped, I realize how hard I was running. “We can rest. I guess I have a lot of steam to burn off.”

“This is where Brady will meet us anyway.” He sits on the ground and pulls off the CamelBak, and I sit next to him. After a long drink he tosses it to me. “Man, Brady said you were fast, but I didn’t think he meant
that
fast.”

I smile. “He said that?”

Seth nods. “Girls’ soccer team could use a runner like you. You’d be a star.”

I take a long drink. “Maybe.”

“Why maybe?”

I shrug, hoping my wide tank top straps will be enough to show it. Tears come out of nowhere. This could be my last weekend here. My last day, even, depending on how much Dad knows. I look up at the stars, hoping the water will sink back into my eyes. Some people don’t like the desert, since it’s so hot and dry and lifeless or whatever. I love it. Any time I want to feel alone, all I have to do is find a desert. No one for miles. Endless stars to remind me how small I am. Hidden beauties for those who look hard enough.

I like
this
desert.

I want to stay here.

I won’t give up. Not yet.

“Fiona?” Seth’s voice cuts through the quiet. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” I run my finger over the dust, making circles and swirls appear from what looks like nowhere.

“You’re lying.”

I glare at him. “And?”

He looks away. “Can’t you just tell me?”

“No.”

He tenses. “If this is because you still don’t trust me, I might have to—”

“It’s not!” It comes out angrier than it should, and I have to take a moment to compose myself again. “It’s not that at all, Seth. It’s just … for your own good.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

I can’t get my mouth to move, and then I can’t hear myself think over Brady’s pounding feet. The light comes closer and closer until a cloud of dust and dirt hits me.

“Whoa! I can kind of see you, Fi!” Brady says as I attempt to brush myself off.

“Yeah,
kind of.
”

“Are you ready for the coolest thing in the world?” Brady sounds like a little kid, and his grin matches.

I laugh at his excitement. “Yes. I’m pumped.”

“Over here.”

I follow them to the base of a small mountain. Brady pushes a massive boulder aside, revealing an opening to a cave. I peer through the darkness and gasp.

I take a few steps closer. The cave isn’t entirely dark—the faintest blue light shines from below. “What is that?”

“You’ll see.” Brady steps into the cave and holds out his hand for me. “It’s really steep here. If your legs are weak from running, just let me know and I’ll carry you.”

“I think I can manage.” My face burns as I take his hand. I’m tempted to trip and take him up on being carried.

His hand is softer than I expected, though his grip is strong. It’s strange how his skin can be so normal when there’s so much power underneath.

Brady wasn’t kidding when he said steep. The cave may be tall enough to fit us standing, but it’s narrow and so vertical I worry I might slip and tumble all the way to the bottom. My legs burn at each step. I don’t even want to think about climbing out of it. The blue light grows brighter as we descend, and it reflects off the rock like sunbeams at the bottom of a swimming pool. There must be water down here, but I still don’t understand the light. It’s not possible.

After what seems like forever, the cave slowly opens up. The ceiling gets higher, the walls farther apart, the ground flatter. I stare at the source of the light—three pools of water. As we get closer, I search for the bulb at the bottom, as if for some weird reason these were built here. Maybe it was an old spa location, just like that run-down building and factory.

No lights.

“What do you think?” Brady asks as he lets go of my hand.

“It’s … amazing.” I kneel down to get a closer look, just in case I missed something. “Why do they glow?”

“Not sure,” Seth says. “We found them a long time ago, and the glow never fades; the temperature of the water never changes. I tried to do research, but I couldn’t find a thing like this. The closest were the New Zealand glowworm caves, but that light comes from the worms in the rocks, not the water.”

“Weird.” I touch the water, surprised to find it warm. “Maybe it’s just a special hot spring.”

“Who cares how it got here? It’s time for a swim!” Brady takes off his shirt, at which point my heart stops. Then he does a cannonball right in front of me.

I wipe the water from my face, smiling. Dad might be out there hunting me, but I’m here now and it’d be a waste to spend my time worrying. This place is cool. I can’t believe Brady decided to share this secret with me. I slip my shoes and socks off and jump in.

The water is just right, not a hot tub but not a pool. My feet barely graze the bottom near the edge, but in the center it’s deeper. After a few small laps to explore, I settle into a ledge I found and try to chill out. My eyes close, and I focus on the comforting feel of the water running over my skin. I am miles from Madison. In a secret underground cave. Dad can’t find me here.

When I open them again, I jump. Brady’s not a foot from me, his smile wide and his hair dripping water down his face. “Feeling better?”

“Yeah.” I smile, surprised at how relaxed I am.

“Good.” He leans on the ledge next to me. “Sometimes I swear this place is magic. It sucks out all the bad feelings or something.”

“I could see that.” I lean my head back, watching him stare into space. He’s just so … beautiful. I could look at him forever and not get bored. “None of my problems seem to matter here.”

He smiles. “Yeah. No school.”

“Or people acting like you’re going to kill them.”

“I hate that.”

I scoot a little closer, whisper so Seth doesn’t hear. “No math.”

He laughs. “Or dads.”

“No kidding. Though my mom is a piece of work, too. What about yours?”

His smile fades, and just like that the energy between us is gone. Without a word, he pushes himself out of the pool and runs to another one, disappearing with a huge splash. I frown. What did I do wrong? It was going so perfectly, and then … Seth swims up to me.

“Sorry, Brady’s sensitive when it comes to talking about our mom.”

I bite my lip, the urge to pry flooding over me. But I remember Bea’s advice and force it back down. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

He shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it. He’ll be okay.”

We float there next to each other, the sound of Brady swimming echoing off the walls. I wonder if I should go talk to him or if that would make it worse. Seth fidgets, like he wants to speak. “Brady was born strong, you know,” he finally says. “Just like you were born invisible.”

“Makes sense.” I’m not sure where he’s going with this, but I hope he’ll just tell me already.

He grins. “You’re being so quiet.”

“I’m trying to listen.” I wince, worried my attitude will change his mind.

He sighs. “Okay, good, because I’d rather not have to talk about this again.” He looks to the other pool. “Brady … killed our mom.”

It feels like the wind got knocked out of me. I’d never even thought about it, but it makes perfect sense.

The bump in Seth’s throat bobs. “Not on purpose, of course. He was just a fetus. The doctors said she had to abort him, and she wouldn’t do it … at least that’s what her journals say. I wasn’t even one at the time.

“Anyway, when he got too big, the bruises became bleeding and broken bones and eventually … yeah.” He sniffs, then coughs like he’s covering it up. “Brady blames himself, no matter how many times I’ve told him it’s not his fault. It was her choice, and it was a pretty noble one.”

I can’t get out words. I feel like such a jerk for talking badly about my mom in front of him, even though I didn’t have a clue. What if I didn’t have her? The thought hurts more than I expected.

Without her, Dad would still have complete hold of me. She’s the one who’s tried to escape. She’s been trying to protect me. Maybe she kind of sucks at it, but she has tried. She’s not leaving Dad for herself; she’s doing it for me. I’d never have tasted freedom without her.

I’m the most ungrateful daughter in the world.

I want to tell Seth I’m sorry, but if I open my mouth I’ll choke on my tears and give myself away. Despite my best efforts, a sniffle escapes.

He startles. “Are you crying?”

“No.” I squeak.

His arms come around me, stronger than I expected. “Don’t cry over us. Sure, it sucks, but we deal with it. Way better than our dad, too. He’s still a drugged-up mess.”

“I’m not crying over you.” His skin is warm, surprisingly comforting. I’m tempted to put my arms around his waist, just to know how it feels to hug someone besides Miles. Before I can think better of it, my hands are on his back. He flinches, but then relaxes again.

My whole body tingles, and I feel slightly guilty about how much I enjoy the feel of him against me. I like Brady. Seth’s
brother.
At least I think I do. But I can’t seem to stop myself. I need comfort, and he’s here for me. I put my head on his shoulder, confused as hell. “I’m such an idiot.”