Traded (7 page)

In that moment, as he stared into those amazing brown eyes and the dark hair that was now longer and pinned back at the sides, he couldn’t for the life of him believe that Jill was standing in the hallway outside his door.

“Jake, I’m so sorry!” She threw her arms around him and cried.

He didn’t have to turn around when he heard the bathroom door open to know that Chris was standing there, watching.

“I’ll be out of here in just a minute,” she muttered. It was all she could think to say in that dreadfully awkward moment when she stumbled out of the bathroom wearing one of the white terrycloth hotel robes. Her hair was a mess, and she could still feel the effects of having Jake inside her. Of course, their clothes were strewn all over the floor by the bed. It wasn’t a large room, so he couldn’t hide anything. She grabbed her clothes off the floor and raced back into the bathroom. She couldn’t get the image of Jake hugging another woman out of her head: her arms looped around his neck, pressed against the same body that had moments ago been pressed against her.

It had to be the mysterious girlfriend who’d been jerking Jake around. Chris hated her. What the hell was the matter with Jake that he hadn’t shut the door in her face and told her to go away?

“Chris.” There was a knock on the bathroom door. She couldn’t find her underwear, and she wasn’t about to go back out there to find them, so she pulled on her bra and shirt and slipped on her skirt before pulling the door open. Jake was still there, and so was the girl, wearing a pained look on her face as if she were the injured party. She wouldn’t look at Chris. She appeared embarrassed. Well, she should be. With her arms crossed, she turned her head, her gaze connecting with Chris’s, and there was nothing understanding or friendly there. Women could be vile, spiteful creatures when it came to their men, but this woman had pushed him away. Chris just hoped Jake would set her straight.
Please stand up for me.

Jake was rubbing his hand across the back of his neck. Awkward—she hated this. “Chris,” he said, reaching for her arm as she raced back, looking for her shoes. She grabbed her purse, which was also on the floor, and then her glasses from the bedside table. She lifted Jake’s shirt and found a shoe. The other woman bent over and picked up her other shoe by the garbage can.

“You looking for this?” She held it out in her slender hand. Jake actually took it from the woman and gave her a look Chris couldn’t have made sense of for the life of her. Was he angry? He was something.

Jake stepped closer, right in front of her, and put his hands on her shoulders. She couldn’t look at him, so she stared at his shoulders—his wide, magnificent, muscled shoulders. They were so strong, and he could hold her together if he wanted to, but she didn’t know where his head was in any of this. And she was humiliated. What was he thinking?

She looked up, because his hands were still on her, but he didn’t say anything, so she patted his hand. She couldn’t spend one more minute here, because out of all the embarrassing things that had happened to her, this was the first time she had ever felt like the other woman, and it brought back all her past failures, how she just couldn’t seem to pull off a stable, normal relationship. It wasn’t sane, considering everything in this twisted situation, namely the mysterious girlfriend who’d dumped Jake and left. Now here she was, walking around with her arms crossed, taking in the hotel room, appearing stiff and awkward. She was back in Chris’s line of sight, and if there was one thing Chris knew without a doubt, it was that the woman didn’t want her here.

“Wait,” Jake said. She could hear the frustration in his voice and could tell that he was processing all of this. It was in his expression, a moral dilemma.

“I’m going to go.” She stepped away, and this time he let his hands fall. He let her go, and she made it all the way to the door on shaky legs, feeling a slight tremble inside of her. Maybe it was shock, but as she pulled open the door, she was hit by a wave of sadness.

“Chris, wait.” His hand was on the door, but she couldn’t turn around, couldn’t look up at him, because then he’d see the tears swimming in her eyes, threatening to spill over.

“Yes?” she said, forcing her voice to remain calm. She held it together and then pressed her hand to her mouth when she felt a sob bubbling up. She pushed it back and prayed he wouldn’t touch her, because then she wouldn’t be able to hold it together. She just needed a minute to find the stairwell so she could slip away alone where no one could see her.

“Just give me a minute here and then I’ll drive you home,” he said. She heard him rest his hand on the door.

“No.” She cleared her throat roughly. What, did he expect her to wait in the hall, where someone could walk by and see her at her worst? “You stay here. I’m a big girl. I can find my own way home.”

“Look, at least let me give you some money for a cab.” He was patting his pockets, and the shock of him tossing her money made her feel cheap and whorish. Didn’t he get that? Just hearing him say it was enough of an icy reality check for her to step away and lift her hand in the air to wave him off.

“No, Jake, I don’t think so.”

She walked straight to the elevator—forget the stairs—and jammed her finger on the button. The wait was the longest few seconds of her life, and she forced herself to stare straight ahead at the elevator doors, knowing that Jake was still there in his doorway, watching her. She wondered too whether he was relieved that she was leaving. Then the elevator dinged, and she stepped in, thankful no one was inside. She pressed the button for the doors to close, and then she sagged against the back of the elevator as it started to move.

He wanted to kick himself as he watched Chris hurry into the elevator. He could tell how stiff she was, standing erect, her shoulders back. She was far from okay with this situation. Hell, he wasn’t okay with any of this, and he felt like a world-class jerk. He was torn as he closed the door to his hotel room and then stared at it. What was it about Jill arriving at his hotel room that had him questioning everything? He rested his hand against the door and turned just enough to see Jill simmering with righteous indignation, watching him watching her. It was so much like a standoff. Her arms were crossed over her dark green jacket and matching jeans. Her bag was still looped over her shoulder.

He took in everything about her, wondering when his illusion of her being the center of his world had begun. She’d meant everything to him, everything he did and planned and decided, he’d always thought of Jill first, but in these few second of staring at each other, he realized something was different for him. He was comparing her to Chris. Jill was taller, slimmer, smaller in the bust, but she still had a great figure.

Her eyes weren’t the big, bright blue eyes that Chris had. No, Chris had eyes that were bold and gave him a glimpse of the strength a woman like her possessed. And the way she looked at him when she listened to what he had to say told him that she understood everything and more. She gave all of herself to him in those moments. It was never about her. How different these two women were. Jill was more timid, sweet, needy. He took a breath to say something but paused. It had always been her leaning on him. Jill had never once thought about him and his needs.

“Well, that was awkward,” she said. “Walking in on you with another woman…I guess you really have moved on.”

He pushed away from the door and stepped around Jill to pull open his drawer, yanking out a t-shirt and pulling it on over his head. He couldn’t look at Jill as his cheeks heated, so he bent down and picked up his shirt and Chris’s lacy white underwear with it. So she’d run out without underwear under that slim-fitting skirt. It was a thought that didn’t make him happy.

He grabbed his socks, his underwear, and pulled open the bottom drawer he used to stash his dirty clothes, then shoved it closed. He could feel Jill watching him. Maybe she was waiting for him to respond, but what could he say?

“Why are you here?” He ran his tongue over his teeth and then crossed his arms when she took a step toward him. He felt himself tense when he realized she was going to touch him.

Maybe she thought better of it, as she pulled her hand away and lowered it to her side. She didn’t come any closer. “I’ve been thinking a lot.”

He cocked his head, wondering how many weeks she had needed to think about what he was offering. Was it second thoughts she was now having? “About what?”

“You’re not going to make this easy on me. I should be furious with you, walking in here and seeing that you’ve hopped into bed with someone else.”

“Seriously?” he barked, jabbing his thumb into his chest as he leaned forward. “You walked out on me how long ago? I asked you to marry me, and you said you still had feelings for my brother. My brother!”

She stepped back. He could see the hesitation. Maybe she feared she was messing with a sleeping lion.

“I called you over and over,” he said. “I waited like a fool for you to come back to me. I begged you. I would have crawled through hell for you.” He squeezed his fists in the air, his jaw tense. Then he stepped away, running his hands through his hair. When he looked back at Jill, she was watching him with such sadness, a tear running down her face.

“You’re right. I wasn’t being fair, but I was being honest.” Her voice trembled, and she hiccupped, fighting against tears.

Jill was a crier. He’d spent many a night holding her in his arms, trying to soothe her tears away. She wasn’t as strong as Chris. He couldn’t help comparing them and seeing all the shortcomings in Jill that he’d never really seen before. Now he realized he didn’t know what he wanted. He’d fought for Jill for so long, believing she was the one, what he needed, but Logan had said long ago, at a time when he was morning his own lost love,
We always want what we can’t have
.

“You were with my brother?” he asked, though he already knew she was. She’d told him as much, but for how long? From the moment she walked away from him?

“Yes!” she cried out.

“How long?” he spit out through his clenched teeth. He needed her to say it, to tell the truth, all of it.

“After I left you. I called him. I’ve been with him since after Christmas.”

“So all this time I was calling you, you’ve been with my brother. Did he know it was me calling, making a fool of myself? Were you two laughing at me, at what a joke I am?”

She didn’t say a word. She touched her fingers to her mouth. She was shaking.

“Ah, I see. Of course you told him.”

She gazed down at the ground, embarrassed. She should be. He hated that shit, especially from Jill, after all he’d done for her, being with her, supporting her emotionally after what his brother had done. Yet she still loved Samuel.

He actually laughed, but it sounded cruel to his own ears. “So why are you here, showing up in Phoenix at my hotel, then embarrassing my friend as I try to move on? What is it you want from me?”

She took a shaky breath as she glanced away, maybe deciding what she needed to say. “I’m pregnant.”

“Fuck!” he shouted, fisting his hands.

She took a step back. Was she scared of his reaction? He stared at her, hard and unforgiving.

“Thanks for picking me up.” Chris wondered how she looked as she climbed into Myles’s red Corvette. His gaze swept over her with disapproval, making her feel worse than she already did. He pressed the gas and pulled away faster than he needed to, which told her loud and clear he knew what she’d been doing, and she was probably about to get an earful.

He changed gears and pressed the gas down so she was pinned to the seatback. Yeah, this car had power, and her brother was obviously pissed. Maybe they’d be at her place in no time and she could hurry inside, shutting out everyone else.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to call, but I didn’t have enough cash for a cab.” She could have walked to a bank machine, but she didn’t know where the closest one was, and she could have been walking for a long way in the dark in shoes that were starting to hurt her feet. The way she was dressed this time of night, with her hair looking as if she’d just gotten out of bed, well…she didn’t want the looks she knew she’d get.

“What happened?” he asked as he changed lanes, driving faster than he should.

“Nothing I really want to talk about.”

“So who’s staying here, Chris, and what the fuck are you doing popping into some guy’s hotel and letting him screw you? Look at you! Everyone in that hotel would know by taking one look at you what you’ve been doing, like some second-class call girl. You’re dressed the part, too.”

He was right, but did he have to be so damn crude? “Yeah, well, it wasn’t planned—and could you just drive me home without the lecture? I’m not a child.”

“Maybe not, Chris, but you’re acting like one,” he snapped. There was nothing remotely understanding in his voice.

Seriously? She was about to tell him to stop and pull over. She’d find another way to get home. Whatever was eating him, she realized he was taking it out on her. He didn’t have a clue what was going on in her life, he’d been so wrapped up in his own. “What’s going on with you, Myles?”

He glanced her way and then back at the road. Yeah, she didn’t miss the sting in his expression. He’d been holding on to something.

“We’ve always talked to each other, but you haven’t been yourself for a while,” she said. Not since he’d fumbled during the big game. Then there’d been the slew of injuries, one after the other. She wondered if he was drinking more, too.

“Should be asking you the same thing, Chris. What’s going on with you? You still haven’t answered me on who you were with. Do I know him?”

“Why, so you can go back and pay him a visit?”

The last thing she wanted was Myles knowing any more of her shame. It was enough that he’d had to talk to her about Troy, coming in and reading her the riot act after the warning call she’d gotten from the cops. Being accused of stalking him had been worse than anything she could ever have imagined. She wondered if all the guys on the team knew.