Trade Off (5 page)

Aiden chuckled. He knew Ryan had been involved with more than a few of the singers signed to their label, in spite of the fact that his father advised against getting involved with their clients. “Man, it’s nice to know some things never change. You’re still the same wild-ass, skirt-chasin’, beer-guzzlin’ player.”

“Hey, somebody’s gotta keep the ladies happy. My brother’s such a tight ass, he eats, sleeps, and breathes that company. Hell, he never makes time for any fun.”

“Yet he’s the one with a lady warmin’ his bed every night, right?”

“It’s only a matter of time before Erika gets tired of his shit and starts lookin’ for a real man.”

Aiden raised an eyebrow. He knew despite Ryan’s trash talk, he and his brother were always close. “You wouldn’t be volunteerin’ for the job, now would you?”

Ryan raised his hands while his half-empty beer bottle dangled between his fingers. “Me? Hell, no! That’s my brother’s lady, man. You know me better than that. There are some lines even I wouldn’t cross and that sure as hell is one of ’em.”

“Glad to hear it.”

Ryan pointed across the expansive backyard to where Brianna lay next to a guy on a lounger, drinking a glass of wine, talking, and laughing. “What’s your sister doin’ with that loser?”

“I don’t think he’s a loser.” Aiden eyed the guy critically, looking for some sign that he may not be good enough for his baby sister. “I met him earlier. His name’s Jared Ross. They go to law school together.”

“He’ll probably be one of those ambulance chasers. Look at him, with his pressed shirt and dress pants…” Ryan scoffed. “And look at the way he swirls his drink like that. I think he might be playin’ for the other team, if you wanna know the truth.”

Aiden slapped his friend on the back. He’d missed Ryan’s brutal honesty. “I don’t think you have to worry about that. When I met him earlier, he seemed really into Bri.”

Ryan scowled. “I don’t like him. Somethin’ about him doesn’t sit right with me, ya know?”

“Who knows?” He shrugged. “My sister’s a big girl. If he’s not the right guy for her, she’ll figure it out in due time.”

“What the hell happened to the over-protective big brother who used to screen her dates in high school?”

“He grew up.” He smiled. “And so did she. Hell, I know it won’t be long before she’s ready to settle down and have a couple of kids with some dude like that. You know Bri, she’s all about family.”

Ryan brought the beer bottle to his lips as he watched Brianna lean in to kiss her date. “Yeah, I know. I’m just hopin’ she doesn’t rush into anything.”

Sela slid into the booth across from her life-long best friend, Sharon Delinsky.

“Okay, you look like you’re about ready to have a meltdown,” Sharon said, setting the leather menu aside. “What gives?”

Forcing herself to draw a deep breath, Sela asked, “Have you heard that Aiden’s back in town?”

“Yeah, not that I follow hockey. But James mentioned it.”

Sharon had met her husband, James, right before she ended her relationship with Neil. “He came to see me yesterday.”

“Shut up!”

Sharon was the only person alive, aside from her parents, who knew the whole truth about what happened back then, and Sela knew she could trust her friend, but a sleepless night meant she needed a little reassurance to put her mind at ease. “He’s looking for answers. He wants to know why I married Neil.”

“Man,” Sharon said, linking her hands in front of her, “I knew he was crazy about you back in the day, but…”

“But what?”

“Come on, Sela. He’s a professional hockey player at the top of his game. He could have any woman he wants, yet he’s still hung up on you. If you ask me, that says a lot.”

Sela didn’t want to read too much into Aiden’s visit. Acknowledging his feelings for her, knowing they could never be a couple again, was too painful. “He’s determined to get answers about me and Neil, and I think he might pay you a visit soon.”

“Hey, you know I’d never say anything.” She crossed her heart with her index finger. “You have my word.”

Sela reached across the table for her friend’s hand. “Thanks, hon. You don’t know how much I needed to hear that.”

“How ‘bout your mama and daddy? You know how much they loved Aiden.” She held her hand up, tipping it back and forth. “But Neil, uh, not so much.”

“They think he took advantage of me, but we both know that’s not true. I could never tell my parents that part of the reason I married Neil was so that they wouldn’t have to mortgage the house to pay for my father’s medical bills. Thank God it never came to that. The insurance covered most of it, and their savings covered the rest. They had to work a few more years, but…” She shrugged. “At least my father’s well now, and he still has his pride. If he’d had to take money from Neil, I hate to think about what that would have done to him.”

Sharon leaned back against the vinyl cushion and stared at her friend a long time before she asked, “I can’t help but think that Neil did take advantage of the situation, in a way.”

“How can you say that? You know I was a basket case when I found out about the baby, and my father’s condition on top of it. Neil was there for me, as a friend, when I didn’t know what the hell I was gonna do.”

“I think a real friend would’ve encouraged you to talk to your boyfriend about it, not try and claim the kid as his own. I hate myself for not insisting you tell Aiden the truth about everything, but I knew how scared you were. I was so worried about you. I thought the last thing you needed was another person pressuring you.”

Sela leaned forward to make sure no one could overhear their conversation. “If I’d told Aiden, he would have been on the first plane back to Nashville. I would’ve ruined his career before it even started.” She was getting a headache rehashing mistakes she thought she’d buried a lifetime ago. “He couldn’t have gotten the kind of contract he deserved staying here; besides, the team here wasn’t even in a position to make him an offer. Maybe if my father hadn’t been sick, I could’ve gone with him, but—”

“We both know Aiden wouldn’t have put anything above you and his baby.” Sharon reached across the table to squeeze her hand. “Still, I can’t help but think you got a raw deal marrying Neil. You’re staying with him to repay some stupid debt.”

“Please, don’t—” Sela said, raising her hand. She’d had this conversation with her best friend too many times over the years and she resigned herself to the fact they would never agree about Neil. “Besides, we both know Aiden felt trapped by the time he left Nashville. As it was, he thought things between us were getting too serious. He needed a little breathing room. He said so himself.”

“If you’re talking about the conversation you overheard between him and Neil the night of his going away party, I think you were reading too much into that. He was excited about moving on to the next phase of his life, but I don’t believe for a second that he didn’t see you in his future.”

Speculating wouldn’t help Sela now. She had to deal with cold, hard facts. “That’s ancient history. My only concern is Aiden finding about…” She sighed. “I know we’re over, but I don’t want him to hate me. I don’t think I could live with that.”

“Can I ask you a question?” Sharon asked, leaning into the bench. “You’re the best auntie to my little girls, but wouldn’t you like to have a baby of your own?”

Sela pressed a hand to her stomach. She gave up on that dream when she lost their baby. “You know that’s not possible.”

“It’s not possible as long as you stay married to Neil. But if you and Aiden could work things out—”

“Stop it! That’s never going to happen. If Aiden found out the truth, he’d hate me. You know that.” She cleared her throat in an inane attempt to regain her composure. “That’s why he can never find out. I’d rather he resent me because I married his best friend than find out that I almost succeeded in perpetrating the most vile kind of betrayal.”

“Honey, you’re being too hard on yourself,” Sharon said quietly. “You were just a teenager. You were scared and faced with the prospect of a baby to care for all by yourself. Your parents pressured you to put it up for adoption because they knew they couldn’t help you care for it, what with your daddy’s condition and all. You felt like Neil was your only option.”

“He
was
my only option.”

“Fine, I know I’m not gonna change your mind about that, but you don’t owe him the rest of your life just because he stepped up to help you out a lifetime ago.”

Sela covered her face with her hands. She gave up trying to make her friend and parents understand why she stayed married to her husband, but Aiden’s return brought all of those questions back to the surface again. “Neil didn’t abandon me when I needed him, and I refuse to bail on him now. That’s just the way it is. You don’t have to understand it, but you do have to accept it.”

Sharon sighed. “Do you honestly think he’s faithful to you when he’s on the road?”

“I don’t know, and honestly, I don’t care to know. I don’t want to start all over again, looking for love, and I really don’t want to be alone. Maybe that makes me sound weak, but the sound of your own footsteps echoing through a big empty house or cereal for dinner because there’s no one else to cook for…” Sela hadn’t intended to reveal her fears about being alone, but since she had, she knew she needed to make her friend understand. “I’m alone a lot as it is because Neil’s on the road so much, but at least I know he’s coming home eventually. The prospect of spending the next forty or fifty years alone is terrifying.”

“That’s ridiculous. You’re a young, beautiful, intelligent woman. You’d find someone else in no time.”

“I don’t want to, that’s just it.” Explaining to her friend something she didn’t understand herself was difficult. “I was in love once, and when I lost him…” She felt the hot burn of unshed tears stinging her eyes, but she vowed she wouldn’t cry. “Let’s just say, I don’t want to go through that again… ever. I’d rather live with someone I consider a friend than be alone or risk getting hurt again. If that makes me sound weak or gutless, then I guess I am.”

“You deserve so much better than this, girl. I’ve watched you going through the motions for years and it’s killing me. I haven’t seen you happy, I mean really happy, since you were with Aiden. It’s like you’re determined to spend the rest of your life punishing yourself for a mistake you made when you were a kid. You deserve to be happy.”

“Don’t make excuses for me. I made some terrible choices and now I have to live with the consequences.”

She thought about the accident that claimed the life of her baby boy. She’d been arguing with her mother about her pregnancy and she ran down the stairs in a fit of anger wearing high heels. Her foot slipped and she tumbled from the top of the stairs to the bottom, suffering a concussion and bruised ribs, but the biggest loss of all was when she woke up and found that the baby she’d fallen in love with was no more.

“Please, just listen to me—”

“I just need your word that you won’t say anything to Aiden about what happened.” When her friend remained silent, she felt a hard knot of dread tightening her stomach. “Please, I need to know I can trust you.”

“I promise.”

Aiden followed his GPS to Sharon and James’s house.

Sela’s best friend was like a sister to him in high school; the four of them were inseparable. He could only hope that some of the genuine affection she used to feel for him remained.

He parked on the street in front of the house, threw his Hummer in park, and hopped out. Before he could ring the doorbell, the door flew open.

Sharon smiled and said, “My little one’s having a nap. I didn’t want to risk waking her.” She reached up to give him a hug. “It’s good to see you, Aiden. It’s been a long time.”

Just like that, the years of silence melted away and he remembered the times they used to sit at the park and talk about his arguments with Sela or her knockdown, drag-out fights with Neil. “You look great.”

She looked down at the faded denim jeans and denim shirt hanging loose over a black tank top. “You’re a liar, but thanks for saying that.”

Sharon always had a contagious vivacity that drew people to her. “I mean it.”

She reached for his hand and tugged him over the threshold. “My hubby’s gonna be sorry he missed you. He’s a huge fan. Hell, when I tell him he’s sittin’ his butt in a chair the great Aiden Cooper sat in, he’ll probably wet his pants.”

Aiden laughed. That was the Sharon he remembered, unabashedly honest with a wicked sense of humor. “I’ll have to make sure you guys get tickets to the season opener.” He didn’t know if she and Sela were still friends. If so, Sharon and her husband may already go to their fair share of hockey games, courtesy of Neil.

“Can I get you a cup of coffee?”

She led him through the old Victorian and Aiden admired that it looked lived in, like a busy family that made good use of the ample space.

“No, I’m good, thanks.”

“My oldest one is at a play date down the street and the little one is down for the count, so that means Mommy needs a caffeine fix to get her through the rest of the day.” She poured freshly brewed coffee into a tall mug and turned to face him. Pointing to the big oak table in the middle of the kitchen, she said, “Take a load off.”