N
yrae
: It was a joy to work with you on this book. I’ve admired your writing since I swooned over Adrian in Facade. Thanks for writing Lucas and Gabriel’s story with me! It took us on quite an emotional and romantic journey and I’m glad I got to experience that with you—my lovely, trusted friend. In fact, I miss you already. Let’s get cracking. ;-)

To Stina, Felice, and David: Thank you for reading and offering your fantastic insight. You are gems to be treasured.

To Deb: Many thanks for double-checking our hospital and mental health practices and procedures. I hope you know what a gifted, dedicated, and compassionate clinical social worker you are.

Vanessa, Manda, Hope, and Jessica: Thank you for helping make the bones of our book strong and polished.

A special shout out to Michelle, for keeping our bookish things organized. You rock.

To Greg and Evan, for not complaining when I have to disappear to work at odd hours of any random day. I don’t want to be in any other place in the world except right next to you, every single night.

To my family and friends for your constant, unwavering support. I love you.

To the amazing book bloggers and reviewers: please know that I appreciate all the work you do—all on your own dime—for the simple love of books.

Last, to the readers: THANK YOU for taking a chance on my books and reaching out to talk to me about them. For an author, there may be no better feeling.

Nyrae’s Acknowledgements

T
o Christina
: I’m so very glad we decided to go on this journey together. Thank you for putting up with my obsessiveness. Thank you for being understanding, kind, loyal, and for not killing me when I vent to you a hundred times a day. I’m so proud of Lucas and Gabriel’s story.

Felice, Stina, and David. Thank you for taking the time to read our book and for helping us make it shine. And for your friendship. I feel so lucky to call you friends.

Jessica and Hope, as always thank you for not blocking me on Facebook. LOL. I know I message a lot but I can’t help it! And thanks for your mad editing skills. You ladies rock.

Manda and Vanessa thank you for your mad editing skills as well. LOL. I appreciate you helping us make this book shine.

Rachel Haueter thank you for naming The Male Box!

To my family. You are my rock. You keep me sane. Thank you for putting up with me.

Michelle you are a million times more organized than I could ever be. Thank you.

Bloggers, reviewers, and readers I couldn’t do this without you. I am thankful for you all every day of my life.

Excerpt from The Deepest Blue

Roadmap to Your Heart Series

Dean

I
lugged
my bike through the door and propped it against the wall. Sliding my messenger bag over my sore shoulder, I sank down on the couch, attempting to take a load off.

Spring semester had finally kicked my ass. I was working tons of hours at one of the labs in the biology department in addition to coping with my regular coursework for my master’s program. But I only needed one more intensive summer class to graduate early.

I rummaged around in my bag for my laptop, but when I found it I didn’t bother to turn it on. I was too beat to work on any more homework tonight.

A couple minutes later, my roommate, Cassie, hustled through the door. She was juggling an armload of textbooks and I sprang up to help.

“He keep you after class again?” I smirked as I placed her books on the table that we used as much for storage as for eating. Though lately, between both our schedules, there wasn’t even enough time for us to share a meal.

“Nope.” She strode to the refrigerator to retrieve a cold drink. “I asked if he needed help.”

Cassie was a professor’s assistant and refused to admit her crush on the handsome and neurotic Dr. Rebol. She’d graduate early as well, but not until winter break.

I braced my hands on her shoulders to give her a quick massage. She rolled her neck as my fingers worked her tense muscles. “The kind of help that involves you being down on your knees?”

She laughed, elbowing me lightly in the ribs. “That’s your fantasy, not mine.”

“Probably right.” I sighed and settled back on the couch.

Maybe I needed to get laid. It’d been a few weeks. But I didn’t have the energy to change out of my khakis and button-down to head to the club tonight.

“Let’s open a bottle of white.” Cassie set her water container on the table and headed to her room to change.

This had become our routine on the nights we were both home. Otherwise, we’d end up on opposite ends of our two-bed and two-bath apartment. We’d been living in this refurbished building in Cameron Village for more than a year, while we finished up at NC State. She wanted to teach business to undergrads and I was eager to be more than a research assistant.

On some base level, I also hoped to earn my father’s approval. Maybe then he’d actually give a damn. He would’ve preferred for me to follow in his footsteps. I could’ve had a marketing job waiting for me upon graduation. Though he never admitted it openly, he questioned whether I could make it in a field that relied heavily on grants and donations, all in the name of science and improving the earth.

“That’s better.” Cassie had thrown on her favorite pastel pajamas with bold red hearts, the only time she showcased her love of bright and puffy designs. Having grown up with three brothers on a game preserve in Florida, she was definitely a tough cookie, but I liked when her softer side showed.

I handed her a glass of chardonnay and we got comfortable on the cushions. We’d become good friends these past few months, having met last year through a roommate posting board in student services. Both transplants from our hometowns, our families were conservative in different ways.

Her brothers were hunky country types who rode around on ATVs—I’d seen photos and some of the images still got my pulse pumping. My family was just plain stuffy in comparison with their dinner parties and charity events. Except for my half-brother Felix, who I connected with when I’d gotten my undergraduate degree.

We shared the same mother but that was about all we had in common. He was part of the Disciples of the Road motorcycle club and I’d admit to being nervous upon meeting him for the first time. But he was only rough around the edges, with a soft center, and we continued to remain in regular contact.

“I have a favor to ask,” Cassie said, biting her lip.

When she got that look in her eye it meant something important. “Lay it on me.”

She heaved one of the couch’s throw pillows onto her lap. “We’ve got summer break coming up.”

“Right.” I took a hearty sip of my wine. I had a feeling I was going to need it.

“Have you decided if you’re going home in June?” Her eyes darted to the wall calendar we kept in the kitchen to keep track of our overlapping schedules.

“My parents won’t be around. They’re taking some cruise,” I said. “Besides, I’ve got to put in lab hours and prep for my final class in July.”

“My cousin’s getting married at Shady Pines,” she said, letting more of her southern twang slip through.

Cassie had grown up in the small town of Roscoe. Shady Pines was the name of her family’s game preserve. Guess the property was large enough to host a family wedding.

“Is this some big shindig with moonshine and kissing cousins?” I was more than curious about her upbringing, having only heard random stories here and there.

“Very funny,” she said, her lip twisting into a reluctant grin. “This might be the way to squash those crazy ideas in your head once and for all.”

“What do you mean?” She’d been trying to convince me of the preserve’s charm and apparently pictures didn’t do it justice.

“I wondered if you’d be my date.” Her gaze was deadly serious.

“Date?” I nearly choked on my wine. “What’s the catch?”

“If I bring somebody they’ll lay off how
right
Jerry and I are for each other,” she said, using air quotes. “My father has been persistent—even Grammy can’t rein him in.”

“Jerry?” I scrunched up my nose. “Why is this the first time I’m hearing about this guy?”

She threw her arm dramatically across her forehead. “Because I rarely think about him unless I need to visit my family.”

My eyebrow quirked. “They’re trying to set you two up?”

“Been trying for years,” she said, her hands turning into fists. “His family’s property aligns with ours and our businesses intersect at times. They have some insane notion that if we finally got back together, we could expand.”

“Holy shit, it’s like that reality show—Swamp something or another—but Florida style,” I said. “So I take it you’re not very fond of Jerry?”

“Can barely stand him anymore,” she said. “We tried dating once and it was decent for awhile. He’s handsome but also has traditional ideals about men and women. Believe me, I have enough alpha males in my own family.”

The thought of all of that testosterone might fuel my imagination for several months. But it also explained why Cassie dated plenty of brainy geeks in this campus town, the type of guy who was in direct contrast to the men she’d grown up with.

And showing up with me? It was as if she was intentionally trying to prove a point.

“You do realize I’m gay, right?” I asked and she chuckled. “Your family doesn’t know your roommate likes boys?”

“No, I never mentioned that.” She cringed. “Actually I never even mentioned that you were a guy at all.”

My mouth fell open. “Are you for real right now?”

Thinking back, I couldn’t remember a time I’d even heard her recite my name in the brief phone calls with her father or grandmother.

“This is a completely different way of life,” she said, motioning to our apartment and probably the city of Raleigh in general. “My move to a different state was enough of a shocker for them.”

I sighed and reached for my reading glasses on the table. I only needed them for the smaller print on my phone, which was pretty much always. I noticed a new text from my friend about some hot guy he met at our favorite gay club in the triangle area.

“Let me guess,” Cassie said. “Tate?”

“Begging me to come up to The Nickel,” I said, typing back that I was in for the night. “I can’t imagine what your family would think of our flamboyant friend.”

“My dad might have a panic attack. He’s always stressed as it is.” She shook her head grimly and balanced her slippers on the edge of the coffee table.

“Especially if Tate wore one of his screen-print designs. The pink one with the rhinestone tiara,” I said, suddenly thankful that Tate lived in this fairly diverse town, amongst friends who accepted him.

“So you can pretend, right?” Cassie asked, steering me back to her original request.

“To like you?” I asked. “I already adore you…but not in that way.”

She rolled her eyes. “Just hold my hand and kiss my cheek every now and again.”

“Suppose I can do that.” I imagined all those times as a kid, wishing I could be
normal.
Acting like it for a long while. And now I was being asked to fake it again. Piece of cake.

“The townsfolk will be swooning over you,” Cassie said, reaching over and running her fingers through my coarse black hair. She always said she had thick hair envy, even though her finer auburn locks were gorgeous. “Even I can admit you’ve got amazing sex appeal.”

I scrunched up my face. “Not sure I get it.”

“Fresh meat,” she said and I wanted to point out that there was plenty of hunky flesh in her brothers. And on the preserve. I nearly felt faint. What the hell was I thinking agreeing to spend time with people who hunted animals?

“Plus, you can see the pretty countryside,” she said, still attempting to convince me of her inane idea. “We’ll show you around.”

“You mean there are other things to do besides shooting wild boars?” I failed to mention how petrified I was of any kind of swine after one nipped me on a family trip to a farm. Even having it served at the dinner table didn’t give me the satisfaction, only made me want to puke.

Cassie grinned. “I hope your misconceptions are blown through the roof, my friend.”

“Will there be any vegetarian options?” I asked, thinking about my mostly raw-food diet. The thought of any kind of wild meat left me practically dry heaving. “You know me and my high-maintenance eating habits.”

“We have a large garden and Grammy’s a great cook,” she said. “By the end of the week, you’ll never want store-bought produce again.”

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say there was a hint of nostalgia in those eyes,” I said, smirking. “I think Backwoods Betty is glad to be going home.”

“I guess I can hate on my family all I want until someone from the outside tries to mess with them,” she said, and I thought of how my younger brother and I would fight tooth and nail as kids. “Besides, I miss Billie. Callum, too.”

How could anybody forget Cassie’s hot ginger brother from those photos?

“So you’ll do it?” she asked, pouting for effect.

I stood up and stretched before heading to the window to check on my vast assortment of herbs and potted plants. I pulled off a couple of dead brown leaves, as I thought her idea through.

I supposed I could beg Tate to keep my indoor garden watered while I was gone.

“Not sure I can handle a whole week, Cassie.”

“How about we drive your car down for the trip?” she said, looking earnest. “Then you’re free to ride back straight after the wedding. I plan on staying longer. Deal?”

It would be nice to get away from the city. I happened to enjoy wide-open spaces, along with some peace and quiet. Though I wasn’t sure how quiet it would be on a game preserve.

“Does this mean I can ask you to one of my family’s boring events in the future?”

My parents chose to ignore the topic of my being gay whenever it came up. Having Cassie around for some comic relief would be like a breath of fresh air.

“Of course,” she said around a yawn.

A devious grin graced my lips. “When do we leave?”

BOOK: Touch the Sky (Free Fall Book 1)

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