To Save You (17 page)

“Hard day.” Five weeks ago, I had my baby. Five weeks ago, I lost my friend. I couldn’t make the funeral, since the arrangements were so rushed and I was still too tired and sore to move. The crying has ceased for me. I just couldn’t cry anymore, but I felt at peace that I had at least said goodbye to him privately.

I had hard days, Mathew usually helped with those. I always get the urge to call him, but I don’t want to bother him. I know how hard it is to see me struggling.

Oliver is a good baby. He isn’t colic, and he just falls asleep in everybody’s arms. Boob time is his favorite, when I am feeding him directly from my breast.

“Marry me.” I turned around and looked at Mathew.

“What?” This I had not expected.

“You heard me. Marry me, beautiful.” He pulled something out of his pocket, a little black box. He opened it up to unveil a beautiful ring. “I asked your dad for his permission months ago. I’ve just been carrying this box around for months.”

He wanted me to know that it wasn’t because he was just trying to make me smile or because I was pregnant. He wanted to wait until I was okay to say yes.

“Yes.” I nod and kiss him. He slips the ring on my finger and I look at it. I smiled.

“You know, the baby is asleep, I can get Dessie and James here pretty quickly.” I say.

“Oh. Oh! Call them.”

I was glad he saw where I was going with this. I called Dessie and she said it’d be only ten minutes, max.

We got the okay to have sex last week, it helped that I didn’t tear and I did my Kegel's and yoga. But with a newborn baby and Matty working, it’s hard to find any place and a time to do it.

“You’re going to be my wife.” Mathew says.

“You’re going to be my husband.” I say back. “I love you so much.” I kiss him softly.

“I love you more than life.” I smile at Mathew’s little saying to me. Three years ago, I would’ve never believed that I would be engaged to a man I loved, or have a child with him that just brought so much life and happiness into a room.

Even with being dealt a bad hand, one after another, I wouldn’t have changed anything. Life has a plan for people, and eventually everyone gets their happiness.

I found mine.