To Honor and Trust (21 page)

When she had finished, Callie strode down the hallway to the large room where she conducted lessons each day. She should take along some of the supplies to help entertain the children on the journey home. And if Daisy didn't recuperate as quickly as the doctor had anticipated, they might need to remain in Biscayne for several days. She uttered a silent prayer for the girl as she placed crayons, pencils, and paper in a large satchel.

“Dinner's ready, Miss Callie.” Lottie coughed and pointed downstairs. “Miss Maude says you should come down now.”

“I hope you're not getting sick, Lottie.” Callie stood and placed her palm against the girl's forehead. “Do you feel ill?”

“I've just been coughing again.” She took hold of Callie's hand. “Miss Jane says to hurry or the food will get cold.”

Callie and the other women, along with Lottie and Thomas, gathered in the small kitchen. Jane placed a tureen of soup and a plate of sandwiches on the kitchen table. “Not much, but the best I could do on short notice.” She smiled at the children. “It's going to seem strange being without work so early in the year, but it was kind of Mr. Bridgeport to pay us for the entire season.”

Maude ladled soup into a bowl for each of the children. “Indeed. I'm sure there's nothing like having enough money to hand it out as you please, while others must work until the day they die.”

Callie frowned, annoyed by Maude's inconsiderate comments. What was wrong with her? Jane and Lula had been hired to work until the end of April, and they wouldn't be able to secure employment anywhere else at this late date. Did Maude think it unfair that he'd paid them, while she would be required to work for her pay? One minute the woman was the epitome of kindness, and the next she exhibited a harsh edge that Callie didn't understand.

They'd finished the evening meal and were clearing the dishes when Maude turned toward Callie. “I think I see someone out in the back who's waiting to see you.”

Callie stepped to the window and caught a glimpse of Wes leaning against the live oak. Her stomach knotted at the sight of him. “I won't be long, Maude. Watch after the children.”

Maude chuckled. “Now, don't you go out there and make any plans to elope with that fella.”

“Maude!”

Maude hiked a shoulder. “It could happen. I eloped with one of my husbands. He was a sweet talker that could convince me of most anything.” She shook her head. “'Course the sweet
talking quit once we was married, so you be careful. I've seen the way that man looks at you, and you never know when a man's going to get the notion to get hitched.”

Callie's heart tilted. Surely that wasn't what Wes wanted to speak to her about. But he had said he wanted to speak to her before she left.

She laid one hand on the cold doorknob and pressed the other hand to her midsection, where butterflies seemed to be having a tennis match. If he brought up the subject of a future together, what would she say? Would she give up the children or working in Africa or helping immigrants in Chicago to marry a man like Wes? If only she knew for certain she could trust him. Maybe then she could consider a life with him.

Silly woman.
She'd allowed Maude's ramblings to give her notions that were not grounded in fact. Yes, he'd shown an interest in her, but that was a far cry from a marriage proposal, and more importantly, a far cry from love. But she had to admit she'd felt that emotional tug on her heart. Did Wes feel it, too?

Hiking up her skirts, she started to cross the yard. Wes hadn't spotted her. Her insides jellied. The man had no business looking so handsome. Maybe she didn't love Wes, but she certainly liked him.

She liked him very much.

Wesley stood beneath a thick limb of the towering live oak that shaded the rear porch of Fair Haven. He leaned against the tree and watched for any sign of Callie. He'd spent the last hours weighing the future, considering what it might hold and what concessions he would be willing to make. He'd gone from thinking Callie might believe she must go to Africa to wondering if she would put aside the idea and consider a life as the wife of a research doctor in this country. It was doubtful she'd be accepted for a teaching position once she married, yet there were many charitable institutions where she could volunteer. If the two of them went to Africa, she could teach—it wouldn't matter there if she was married. But his chances of conducting research would be nonexistent. There would be no laboratories or funding. He would need to return to treating patients. Could he do that? With Callie by his side, he thought it might be possible. But first he needed her agreement to marry him.

He pulled out his pocket watch and glanced at the time. Being late to the clubhouse was going to create major problems with his father. Wesley could picture the patriarch of the
Townsend family pounding on the door of Wes's room at the clubhouse right about now.

He'd known when he made the arrangements to meet Callie that he was taking a risk. Even more than a future together, he worried that she might say she wanted nothing to do with him once he revealed the truth. What if she believed he was no different from the man she'd been engaged to marry? She'd been clear: She wanted a man she could trust. Would she think him untrustworthy because he hadn't told her about his past?

“It's too late now.” He muttered the words and pitched a pebble across the yard. “She'll either accept me or reject me, and I have no one to blame but myself.”

“Are you talking to an imaginary friend, or is someone hiding behind the tree?”

He startled and looked up to see Callie approaching. “Neither. I was talking to myself. Thinking out loud.”

Her lips curved in a beautiful smile. “Care to share your thoughts with me?”

“That's exactly what I want to do.”

She gestured to the Adirondack chairs near the tree. “Why don't we sit down?”

He sat on the edge of the chair, his chest tight with anticipation. Had she heard what he'd said about accepting or rejecting him? “You know I care for you, and because I do, I want you to know the truth about me.” Fear sparked in her eyes and he smiled. “Don't worry. I'm not a murderer or a thief, but on a couple of occasions you've asked about my family.”

“And you haven't told me much.” Her lips curved in a sweet smile. “I haven't held that against you. I know questions regarding family members can sometimes be difficult to answer.”

“That's true enough. In my case, it's because I've always
been a disappointment to my family. I haven't been the man they wanted, and my father, particularly, frowns upon the decisions I've made. Though he hasn't said it, I know he considers me a failure.” He straightened his shoulders. “It's not that I haven't tried to be the kind of man he hoped for, but it just hasn't worked out.”

“I'm sorry, Wes. Feeling that you've disappointed your parents can be heartbreaking. I know I've felt the same way from time to time.”

“Because you haven't gone to Africa?”

“Yes. I know they think it should be a simple decision, because it was easy for them.”

“Exactly! That's the way it is with my father, as well. Just because certain decisions came easily to him, he thinks it should be the same for me. But we aren't all the same.”

“They don't realize that our lives aren't exactly as theirs were when they made their decisions. My parents were already married, and I was away at boarding school when they decided to go to the mission field. They were much older than I am now, and yet they think the decision should come easily for me.”

Wes nodded his agreement. “I don't think anyone has ever understood my feelings the way you do, Callie. My mother understands a little, but she tends to take my father's side in order to keep peace. Being with you these past months has been the best time of my life.”

A blush colored her cheeks, and she glanced away. “I'm sure there have been other young ladies who have valued your ideas.”

“Not like you. Most of them were more interested in a fancy home and large sums of money than in my thoughts about life.”

“Then you must have been calling on the wrong kinds of
girls, because there are lots of young women who are interested in more than money.”

“You're probably right, but they didn't cross my path.” He reached forward and clasped one of her hands. “The other night I was thinking about all the things I admire about you, and the list got mighty long.”

Her eyes sparkled. “That's very kind of you to say, Wes.”

“Well, it's true. I love your candor and honesty—you're not afraid to say what you believe, yet you do it with a kind and gentle spirit. You have a sweet nature, and I admire the way you treat everyone with consideration—including the servants and other workers. I never hear you speak to them in a demeaning way, and you're always quick to offer help to others.”

He released her hand as she scooted back in the chair. “My family had servants while I was growing up, but my parents taught me that God desires all of us to have a servant's heart. I think that's why I always wanted to teach. It's my way of serving and helping others. When I was younger, I brought my schoolbooks home, and every evening I worked with two of our servants who didn't know how to read.” She stared into the distance as if transported back to another time. “We always treated those who worked for us as members of our family. And they rewarded us with loyalty and love in return.”

Wes couldn't believe his good fortune. He'd fought against coming to Bridal Veil for the winter. Now he realized that if he hadn't given in to his mother's pleas, he would never have met Callie. Surely God must have been directing his path to this woman.

“I hope you won't think me bold, but I must tell you how I feel before you leave Bridal Veil.” He moved from his chair and stooped down in front of her. “I'm declaring my love for
you, Callie. I know we haven't known each other very long, but I do know you are the woman God intended for me.”

His heart pounded as he waited for her response.

“I've come to care for you as well, Wesley. To be honest, it has been very hard for me to admit to myself that I was beginning to fall in love with you. I had promised myself that I would never again be hurt by a man.”

“And I won't hurt you—you have my word.” Wesley gathered her hands in his own.

Callie cast her gaze upon their hands. “Matthew said similar words to me.” She lifted her head and looked at him. “I don't want to constantly compare you to Matthew—it isn't fair to you or to our relationship, but you must understand that it will take time for my trust in you to take hold. After being betrayed and so deeply hurt, I guard my heart even when I don't think there's a need.” She smiled at him. “But it's your openness and honesty that have begun to break down the fence I'd built around my heart, and I'm thankful you've saved me from myself. I don't want to go through life without the ability to trust the people I love.”

His voice faltered. “I hope you count me one of those people you love.”

“I do, Wesley. And in time, I know you'll destroy any remaining doubts I might have about the love between a man and a woman.”

Wesley massaged his temples, trying to stave off the threatening pressure. He must reveal his past as well as his true identity to Callie. Waiting any longer to reveal his biggest secret could destroy her mounting trust in him. On the other hand, if he told her right now, would she order him out of her life? He already knew the answer. She was leaving tomorrow—he must tell her before she departed.

He inhaled, trying to dispel negative thoughts. “There are some things about me and my past that I haven't revealed to you. Matters that might cause you to believe me dishonest.”

“You just declared your love, and now you tell me that you've lied to me?” She withdrew her hands, and he could see the pain in her eyes.

“Please don't jump to conclusions. It has nothing to do with us or how I feel about you. This is about me and my background, as well as some things in my past. I'm not who you think. I'm not a wandering golf pro. I've enjoyed a life of privilege. My family is quite wealthy.” He reached for her hand, but she pulled away. “Please, Callie. Just listen to what I have to say. There are reasons why I didn't divulge these things to you earlier.”

She stared at him. “Honesty isn't something you pick and choose for the proper time, Wes. If you care about someone, you should be forthright at all times.” Tears rimmed her eyes. “I truly thought you were such a man, but once again I've been wrong.”

“No, you aren't wrong. Let me explain. After I've told you everything, I think you'll understand my position.”

“That remains to be seen, but I wouldn't be so—”

“Callie! Hurry! Come quick!” Maude stood near the back door, waving frantically in their direction.

Wes jumped to his feet and followed Callie to the house. Why now? Just when he'd gathered courage to tell her the truth.

Callie raced toward the back door, not certain whether she was annoyed or pleased by the interruption. Wes had been
keeping secrets. Her heart felt as though it had been torn into pieces. She'd been overcome by feelings that spanned every imaginable emotion: anger, curiosity, confusion, fear, despair, suspicion, surprise, grief, hate—but as she reached the porch stairs, she realized there was one thing she hadn't felt—the desire to forgive. Yet even as the thought crossed her mind, she shoved it away. Knowing how much truth meant to her, still he had lied.

“What is it, Maude?” Callie panted for breath as she awaited the nanny's reply.

“Lottie. She's having trouble with her breathing again. I can't get her to stop crying, and the crying makes the cough worse. She—”

Lottie pushed around Maude's skirts, her eyes red and swollen. She held a handkerchief to her mouth as she coughed and then tried to draw in a ragged breath. She wheezed and her eyes grew large at the attempt to gain enough air.

Callie leaned down and rubbed the girl's chest. “You must quit crying and calmly breathe.”

While Lottie continued to wheeze and gasp for air, Wes drew near. “Does she have any medicine that might help?” He reached for Lottie's arms and held them above her head.

Callie glared at him. “What are you doing?”

“It helps ease the spasms. Hot peppermint tea would help, too. There are properties in the tea that help open the bronchial passages. The steam will also help. And if you have a jar of honey, hold it beneath her nose and have her smell it. Sometimes that helps, as well.”

Still fighting her anger at him, Callie shifted around and glared at Wes. “Let go of her. Unless you've become a doctor in the past few minutes, I don't need your suggestions or advice.”

He released Lottie's arms and took a backward step. “I was only trying to help.”

Callie immediately regretted her harsh words. She might be angry at Wes, but acting the shrew was uncalled for and unbecoming. “I'm sorry, but I think you should leave. I need to see to Lottie.”

“Let me come in and lend a hand. If you don't need my assistance with the children, I'm sure there are other things I can do to help.” He touched her shoulder. “I need to talk to you, Callie. I want to settle matters between us before you go.”

Callie shook her head, tears threatening to spill. “I don't have time. Right now, I must see to Lottie. After that, there are other things needing my attention.” She dropped her gaze. “And I think you've already said more than enough.”

Placing an arm around a rasping Lottie, Callie hurried across the back porch of Fair Haven. As she crossed the threshold, a tear slipped down her cheek.

He'd said he loved her. Was that a lie, as well?