Thorn Boy and Other Dreams of Dark Desire (37 page)

‘
I can’t
remember how I answered this bizarre and inappropriate question,
but Arcaran raised his hands against my bluster and said, “There is
a stinging salamander on your son’s back. It is feeding upon
him.”

‘
I could
see no such thing and said as much, although I remember my flesh
went cold.

“
Oh, it
is there,” said the magician, “it is an elemental being, the cause
of the prince’s torpor. It must be removed, and quickly, for it is
already laying eggs.”

‘
When I
heard these words, I went utterly cold. It was as if I could smell
something foul in the room, something evil.’

The king shook
his head, and would have continued, but I decided it was time to
interrupt this preposterous narrative. ‘Eggs? Salamanders? Perhaps
it is time I saw the phenomenon for myself.’ I paused. ‘I trust no
action has yet been taken to remove this alleged elemental?’

The king shook
his head. ‘Indeed not. Arcaran was most insistent that your aid
should be sought first.’

‘
How
polite of him,’ I said. Quietly, I wondered why the charlatan
showed such consideration.

Accompanied
only by his vizier, King Jaiver led Meni and I to the prince’s
bed-chamber. Here, dark drapes were drawn against the heat of the
day, so that the light was brownish. I saw the boy lying on golden
pillows, covered by a thin tasselled blanket. His body gleamed with
sweat, but I sensed that should I touch him, his flesh would be
cold. I could tell at once that this was more than a fever, but I
could not credit the idea of unseen parasites.

I walked
around the bed for a few moments, sniffing the air. The strange
thing was that I could not smell sickness. The air was dry and
faintly redolent of smoke. They had been burning an acrid incense
in there. I forcibly repressed a shudder. ‘I really think he should
be moved to the temple,’ I said. ‘He needs light and air.’

‘
But the
demon creature,’ said the king. ‘You should not carry one across
the threshold of the Sektaeon. Surely that would be
dangerous?’

I made my
voice cold and harsh to indicate my patience was fraying. ‘I and my
priesthood are quite capable of dealing with any eventuality.’

The king
bowed. ‘Great lady, we have no choice but to obey your word, but I
have to say that your decision distresses me greatly. In the temple
of fire, the elemental could acquire great strength and take what
is left of my son’s life.’

‘
You
must trust me,’ I said.

Then, a faint
hiss and a dry rattle emanated from one of the dark corners of the
room and a man emerged from the shadows. He had, of course, been
present the entire time, but for whatever reason had concealed his
presence until now.

He bowed
slightly and extended his arms in an expansive gesture. Such
theatre! ‘Great lady, you must not take the boy into your
temple.’

I put as
much sneer into my voice as I could muster. ‘Ah, you must be
the
physician
who diagnosed
the case. Your presence is no longer required. I am here
now.’

The magician
stole forward. He was not garbed in the flamboyant robes I’d
expected, but in dark, close-fitting garments, such as those worn
by nomad warriors of the wilderness. ‘You are sceptical,’ he said
mildly, ‘and that I understand, but perhaps if you and I could be
alone with the prince for a short time, I could show you the nature
of the affliction.’

‘
Now is
not the time for illusions,’ I said briskly. ‘We can all see the
prince is gravely ill. Now, if you will step aside, my priest will
carry his highness to my litter.’

‘
No,’
said the magician, and for brief moment his strange dark eyes
burned with an amber spark. He held my eye for a while, almost as
if he could see through my mask, and during that time it was as if
he and I were the only people in the room. I had never encountered
such an intensity of gaze. Within it, I saw passion, fire and
knowledge, but also a fierce kind of tragedy. It shocked
me.

‘
I am an
illusionist, yes,’ said the magician softly, ‘but not just that.
There are times for illusions and there are not. I am aware of the
distinction, lady.’

I hesitated
for a moment, then said, ‘Leave us. Everybody.’

There were
murmured assents from the king and his vizier, but forthright
protests from my high priest. ‘Your reverence,’ Meni said in a
strained voice. ‘Is this wise?’

I turned my
head to him. ‘There is nothing to fear. Please, leave. I will call
you shortly.’

Alone, Arcaran
and I faced each other across the bed, where the prince moved
feebly, uttering sighs.

‘
I
appreciate this,’ said the magician, ‘You will…’

I interrupted
him coldly. ‘Do you know who I am?’

He frowned
briefly, then bowed again, smiling. ‘You are the avatar of Sekt,
the goddess on earth.’

‘
Yet you
speak to me with little respect. It’s clear to me that the king
dances to your tune. Who and what are you? Why are you here? What
is your aim in this?’

He continued
to smile, apparently unflappable. ‘I appreciate your curiosity and
concern. Here are the answers you seek. I am what you perceive me
to be. I am here because I was summoned. My aim in this is to heal
the prince.’

It was
clear he sought to charm me, yet there was something –
something
– utterly compelling about
this man. Merely being in his presence seemed to inform me he had
seen many wonders of the world, that he possessed great knowledge.
Perhaps he too wore a mask. However, I would not let him win me
over that easily. ‘You prey upon the rich,’ I said. ‘You dupe them
of their riches with your illusions.’

He grimaced,
head tilted to one side. ‘That is a sour depiction of my
profession, but not without some basis of truth. Still, I am a
creature of many facets. Not all of them are based upon
deception.’

I made myself
totally still. ‘Show me this parasite, then. No tricks. The
truth.’

Without
further words, he leaned over the prince and gently turned him onto
his stomach. He drew down the blanket. Reevan’s flesh appeared
sallow in the dim light, the sharp ladder of his spine too close to
the surface of his skin. The magician lifted the prince’s hair from
his neck. ‘Look closely,’ he said. ‘To see it, focus beyond the
prince’s skin. Try to look inside him.’

‘
I am
not easily suggestible.’

‘
This is
no illusion. Do as I say. You are Sekt. You must be able to see
this creature.’

For some
moments, I concentrated as he suggested, blurring my sight until my
eyes watered. Then, it came. I saw nothing with my physical sight,
yet, in my mind, I sensed pulsing movement, many legs and a
presence of malevolence. If it had a form at all, it was a filthy
smoky suggestion of a shape. I drew back, uttering an instinctive
gasp. Even then, I was aware of the power of suggestion. This did
not have to be real, simply because I’d perceived it, yet there was
no doubt an evil odour of malice oozed upwards from the bed. It was
like being in the presence of a crowd of people, who all hated me
utterly. I made no comment, confused in my own thoughts.

‘
You
see?’ said the magician.

‘
I
see
nothing,’ I
replied carefully. ‘But I sense something. This may, of course, be
an illusion emanating from you.’

‘
It is
not,’ said the magician softly. ‘Come now, great lady. You are
Sekt, a goddess. The goddess perceives all, does she
not?’

It came to me
swiftly then how wrapped up I was in the trivia of mundane life. I
lived fully in the corporeal senses, lolling around in the sun,
uttering the first words that came into my head. And yet I was
supposed to be divine, to see and sense all. Perhaps I had been too
much the lazy lioness. ‘There are ancient rituals in the temple
library,’ I said slowly, ‘which are designed to deal with
possession by bodiless entities. It would perhaps do no harm to
perform them.’ I stood up straight. ‘I must summon my priest.’

‘
No,
said the magician.

‘
It is
not your decision.’

‘
I have
another suggestion. Will you hear it?’

‘
Very
well.’

‘
I have
travelled in many lands and have seen many strange things. My
knowledge has been gathered from every corner of the world. I have
seen cases such as this before, and once a fire witch taught me how
to treat the condition. The prince is afflicted by a spirit of the
wilderness, a creature of fire. The people of this city have mostly
abandoned the old ways, and while, in some respects, this ignorance
has weakened the ancient spirits, in other ways it has made the
people vulnerable to them. They have forgotten how to protect
themselves, how to fight back.’

I remembered
the dreams I had had, the smell of burned meat around the temple.
‘I have always believed that new gods drive out the old. Sekt is
mistress here now.’

‘
Yes, a
goddess of fire. She is not that different. Like calls to like.
What reason would she have to drive out her own denizens, only
because they are known by a different name? This is why
you
can remove this parasite. In a
way, it is your servant.’

I stared down
at the prince. If this was true, I felt no kinship to the thing on
the boy’s back. I could barely sense it. I realised then that the
priesthood of Sekt had lost a lot of their magic. We were fat and
domesticated lions, dozing by pools, licking our paws. Where was
the lioness of the wilderness, breathing fire? Did she still exist
within me? I had no doubt the magician had also thought these
things. Perhaps he despised me for what I was; a mask with nothing
behind it. ‘What was the suggestion you had to make?’ I said.

‘
That
you and I take the prince out into the wilderness, where I will
teach you what the fire witch taught me.’

‘
Why to
the wilderness? Why not here?’

‘
We need
the elements around us. We need to tap their power. Too long have
you hidden behind stone, my lady. I am offering you a great gift.
If you are wise, you will take it.’

‘
You are
importunate!’ I snapped. ‘I am Sekt.’

‘
Are
you? Then banish this creature of fire now. Take it by the tail and
toss it from the window.’ He stood back with folded arms,
appraising me.

I was
breathing hard. My veil fluttered before my face. Meni would never
allow me to venture out into the wilderness alone with this man. He
would not let me be so foolish and, if necessary, would physically
restrain me. Yet there was a wild desire for me to take what the
magician offered me. I sensed he spoke the truth. I wanted to be
alone with him, buffeted by hot winds beneath an ardent canopy of
stars. I wanted to conjure fire spirits, be the lioness of the
desert. ‘It would be regarded as unseemly for me to venture out
with you alone,’ I said.

‘
Do they
watch you so stringently?’

‘
Are you
suggesting deception? How will you spirit the prince from his bed
without detection?

He smiled and
I realised he was beautiful, like the sky is beautiful, or the
raging of a storm. I had met no one like him before. ‘Remember what
I am,’ he said.

‘
When?
How?’ I asked, breathless.

‘
Tonight,’ he said simply. ‘Why delay? Will you be able to
get away?’

I thought
about the sleeping temple, the dozing guards, the great air of
torpor that hung over its colonnaded halls from dusk until dawn. I
could slip like a wraith from shadow to shadow, leap the wall like
a lioness, land without making a sound.

‘
I know
what you are,’ he said. ‘You are a goddess, yes, but are you not
also a woman? Are you not also a lioness? You crave adventure, even
the hunt. You crave the ecstasy that freedom brings. Indulge
yourself, my lady. Who will ever know?’

He was a
friend to me. I had known him many lifetimes. In the night, in the
wilderness, he would be a black lion, gliding at my side.

Once the king
and Meni returned to the prince’s bedroom, I told them that I would
perform the ancient rituals the following evening. I would need a
day to prepare. Meni seemed a little bemused by my decision, and I
knew that later he would quiz me about it, but he was loyal and did
not voice his concern in public.

Outside the
palace, back in my litter, I felt dizzy, almost sick. What was I
doing? How had I become so infected with these alien feelings? The
magician had conjured illusions for me, but I knew they could be
real, because they did not involve magical ropes, phantom flowers,
or even bittersweet memories. They were possibilities, a revelation
of what could be. I had never craved freedom, yet now it seemed the
most heady thing on earth. I had never felt the stirrings of desire
for a man, nor even curiosity, yet here it was, hot and burning in
my belly. I should have known then, sent word to the king, had the
magician drowned or beheaded. Yet, instead, I lay back among my
cushions, swooning like a lovesick girl.

I could not
wait to dismiss my servants from my presence this evening. The air
was full of a tension only I could feel. Candle flames bent into a
wind that was not there. Incense smoke curled to the side. Even
now, I entertain a dangerous hope. I think of Aan, the husband I
have never met, he whose face is beautiful. Has he found some way
to escape his temple? Has he come to me wearing the face of a man?
How can I think such things? And yet, I do not find myself thinking
about the fate of Prince Reevan, or even what the magician will
show me tonight. I think only of his face, of being near him, of
the vast expanse of wilderness around us, the infinite sky above. I
run my fingers over the mask that shrouds me. The gold feels hot
like fevered skin. I feel it might crack like the skin of a serpent
and then I will slither out of it, reborn. If he does not wither
before me, he is the one, but dare I take that chance?