Then There Was You (35 page)

As hard as it was, it was better this way. Of course, if he ever changed his mind, I knew I would support him. That’s the thing about life. Things can change on a dime. I just had to be open and willing to accept that change.

In an effort to move on from that subject, Chris stood up and carried his plate to the sink.

“Don’t worry about it,” I told him, I waved my hand toward the sink full of dirty dishes. “I can do those later.”

“I’ll help,” he offered, shrugging his shoulders. “It’s nice to do normal stuff from time to time.”

“With your
normal
date?” I teased as I stood up from the table.

Chris dropped his plate in the sink and turned to look at me. “Trust me,” he said, his dark eyes penetrating mine. “I’d take your normal over their sexy any day.”

I rolled my eyes and huffed, “Not according to the tabloids.”

“You believe that horse shit?” he asked, shaking his head. He crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back against the sink.

“Pictures don’t lie,” I said, copying his posture.

“Oh, you’re talking about the most recent Celebrity Star headliners?” Clearly annoyed, Chris furrowed his eyebrows. “Well, did the pictures tell you that the girl I was hugging just lost her husband who had been deployed overseas in the military? She was having a quilt made with his old concert T-shirts and was making it her mission to get them all autographed first. And did the pictures tell you that the girl whose hand I was holding just lost her sister to a battle with breast cancer? In an effort to raise money for breast cancer awareness, she was trying to plan a benefit concert with one of her sister’s favorite musicians. Most of what they put in those magazines is total bullshit.”

Suddenly, I felt like an idiot. I was making judgments based on sensationalized tabloid melodrama. I knew better, but it was so hard to refrain when I found myself so emotionally involved. “No,” I frowned. “No, I guess the pictures didn’t really tell me all of that.”

Chris took a step toward me. Towering over me, he brushed the hair out of my face and traced his finger down the side of my cheek. Staring into my eyes, his brown irises swirling with an indescribable emotion, he murmured, “Did the pictures tell you that I haven’t been able to get you off my mind since I saw you in New York? That the only thing I can think about is being here with you, in this
normal
life, and not having to say goodbye again?”

I couldn’t speak. My heart thundered in my chest. I didn’t want to have to say goodbye again either. Every time I closed my eyes, I relived the dream of our kiss, the feel of his arms around me, the taste of his lips on mine. I longed for him.

Chris cupped my face in his hands, staring at me with a longing that matched the one in my heart. “I don’t understand any of this, Salem. When I walked away from Kaitlyn, I thought I’d never love another woman like I loved her. I’m confused. I find myself thinking and feeling things I never imagined in a million years. I’m a fucking wreck. Part of this feels so wrong. I was a teenager. You were my counselor. It’s hard to get past that. That’s why this whole thing has me so messed up.”

He glanced away, lost for a moment in his own thoughts. He ran his fingers down the sides of my arms, triggering goose bumps on my skin. Clasping my hands and fixing his gaze on me again, he said quietly, “These strong feelings I have for you, they’re just too soon. But then I look back, remembering the bond we had, how you were there for me, how much you meant to me back then, and I realize that this thing between us now… it isn’t new. It started years ago with a closeness we didn’t understand, but both needed. A friendship that helped us both through some tough shit.”

I nodded, too overcome with thoughts and feelings to give a response. He was right. We did have a connection back then; one I couldn’t explain and didn’t understand. Since the day I’d left him at his apartment in Charlotte, I’d found myself having feelings for him that confused me too. My brain told me it was wrong because he was a teenager when I met him, but now he was a man—a strong, handsome, focused and driven man that I found myself thinking about more and more each day.

Chris pulled me closer and smiled. “Because of you, I walked away from juvie that day with hope. You listened to me, and you encouraged me. You
gave
me hope. Hope for a life out of trouble, a future in music, a chance for happiness, even love. Dum spiro spero. While I breathe, I hope, remember?” Then looking me straight in the eyes, he whispered, “I realize it now.
You
are my hope, Salem.”

I gasped. I didn’t know what to say, how to feel. All I knew was that whatever he felt in his heart at that moment, I felt it too. The sincerity in his voice caused me to swallow hard the lump that had been forming in my throat. I looked down at his tattoo as the tears slipped silently down my cheeks. All along, he’d been walking through life, hoping for something. And all along, the hope he sought was
me
.

Slowly, he leaned toward me. For a split second, we shared the air between us. This moment… it was exhilarating and scary. I felt lost, and yet I felt right at home. Inhaling simultaneously, our lips united, and the world around us disappeared.

The moment his lips pressed to mine, a pulse of electricity throbbed deep down, momentarily taking my breath away. I succumbed to the gentle pressure of his mouth on mine and kissed him back. Softly, his tongue parted my lips and delved into my mouth massaging my tongue with his. Pressing his body flush against mine, he walked me backwards until the small of my back was pressed against the counter behind us.

Chris moaned, grasping the sides of my face and weaving his fingers into my hair. He gently pulled me toward him, kissing me with reckless abandon. My hands found their way to the back of his head as I desperately tugged him closer to me. I felt like my body could take flight with the feelings that were swirling throughout it. The emotion behind his kiss awakened sensations inside of me that I hadn’t felt in quite some time. Or maybe ever. I melted into him, allowing the moment to overtake me. My heart felt full. Everything was perfect.

Chris ended his kiss, slowly pulling away to look at me. “Wow,” he whispered. “That was… just… wow.” He closed his eyes, leaning into me. I closed mine too, appreciating the peace between us as I breathed in the cool, refreshing scent of his cologne.

We held onto each other, savoring the moment for several minutes. Our bodies yearned for more, but our time together had all too quickly come to an end. Gently touching his forehead to mine, he groaned, “Damn, I wish I didn’t have to leave again.”

I peered up at him, staring into those dark windows to his soul. “I wish you didn’t have to leave either,” I said, clutching him to me as if I never wanted to let go. Atlanta could wait. I needed him more.

“Tonight has been wonderful,” he said softly. “Every night before I fall asleep on my rat trap tour bus, I’m going to think of this moment right here with you.”

He leaned in again, softly brushing his lips with mine, and whispered, “You’re everything I’ve been wishing for, Salem.”

I smiled under the heat of his breath and felt myself falling head over heels for Chris King.

The daily routine for me was always the same old, boring rut. Weekends were even more so. Sometimes Alexis spent the weekends at her dad’s house or with a friend. On those days, the highlight of my day was hearing Chris’s voice on the phone.

Concert or no, Chris called me every night. Sometimes, I’d get the call early, before a show. Sometimes, it was late, around two in the morning. Sometimes I’d hear loud, raucous partying in the background. Sometimes I’d hear silence. Some nights he’d be drunk off his ass, chalking it up to ‘life as a rock star’. Sometimes he’d be stone-cold sober. Nevertheless, he’d always call to say goodnight. Every night, it ended the same way.

“It’s good to hear your voice,” Chris would whisper into the phone. “I can’t wait to see you again.”

“Me either,” I’d say, sadness lacing my tone. “Hopefully soon.”

“Goodnight, beautiful. Sweet dreams.”

I’d always slip off to dreamland with a smile on my face.

“Meet me in Jacksonville,” Chris pleaded with me late one night on the phone.

“I can’t… I’ve got Alexis–”

“Bring her too,” he insisted, sounding desperate. “I’ll get two tickets to fly you down here for the weekend. She’ll be back in time to go to school on Monday. I need to see you.”

I debated his offer. God, I missed him so much. “I can’t. Her first volleyball game is this weekend. I have to be here for that.”

“I understand.” The disappointment in his voice was palpable. “Well, maybe I can fly you down to Tampa or out to New Orleans when we get there.”

The ache inside of me grew a little bigger. “I’m so sorry… I’d love to see you. I miss you. I just can’t do it this weekend.”

He sighed, long and loud. “It’s okay. We’ll work something out. I can’t wait to see you again.”

I swallowed, wishing I could reach through the phone and touch him. “I can’t wait to see you either.” We hadn’t exactly defined what we were to each other, afraid to label it, but every day without each other, our longing grew stronger. With every phone conversation, our feelings grew deeper. All I knew was that with each passing day, I felt more connected to him than ever.

Saturday came and Chris was in Jacksonville without us. Their concert had been Friday night, so they had the whole weekend off before they left for Tampa on Sunday afternoon. Alexis’s team won their game and we headed to the local frozen yogurt shop. We made a quick stop to fix our treats then headed home to celebrate.

I was teasing Alexis about the gummy worms she’d picked as a topping when we pulled into the driveway. It was getting dark. The sun was setting, and bright orange streaks illuminated the sky. The sunsets were always beautiful this time of year.

“Mom, look.” Alexis pointed toward the house.

Holy shit. It couldn’t be.
But it was Chris. On my front steps. He looked amazing in worn jeans and tight, long-sleeved Henley. He was leaning against the post, one foot propped up a step higher than the other, with both arms resting on his knees looking down at his phone. A red duffle sat next to him. He looked up when he saw us pull up to the house.

I slammed the car in Park and hopped out. He stood up when he saw me, bearing a mischievous grin and a please-don’t-tell-me-to-leave expression. I catapulted from the car, sprinting to get to him. He seemed just as eager to catch me as we both threw our arms around each other.

“What…? How did you…? You’re here!” I finally managed to get something out.

Chris tightened his grip, lifting me a couple of inches off the ground. He brushed my hair away from my face, gently kissing me on the forehead. “I missed you. I had to see you.”

I cupped his face in my hands, relishing the soft prickle of his stubbled cheeks. “I’m so happy to see you.” Then remembering his tour schedule, I asked, “But, don’t you have to be in Tampa tomorrow?”

He pulled back and frowned. “I have to leave by four in the morning. So, we only have a few hours together. But, I’ve missed you so much.”

About that time, Alexis made her way up onto the porch, gawking at our surprise visitor.