The Touch of Sage (40 page)

“
I
’
spect that oughta tell you somethin
’
then, miss,
”
Winnery
mumbled.

“
Come on, Sage,
”
Mary said.
“
Let
’
s get home.
”

Sage shook her head.
“I-
I need a walk, Mary,
”
she said.
“I-
I just need a little walk.
”

“
All right, honey,
”
Mary said.
“
All right.
”

As Sage turned to leave, Ivy caught hold of her arm.
Sage looked at the vile beauty
—
repulsed by her touch.

“
I hate you,
”
Ivy growled.
“
I hate you for the way he kissed you just now.
”

Sage drew in a deep breath.
“
Then we
’
re even, Ivy Dalton,
”
she said.
“
Because I hate you.
I hate you for ever hurting him.
”

Sage turned then—
turned and walked away.
She wasn
’
t certain at first that her legs could support her.
She wasn
’
t certain she wouldn
’
t collapse in a sobbing heap right there in the middle of town.
Yet somehow she managed—s
he managed to keep walking. Somehow she managed to make it to Ruthie.
And when she did, she wondered what it would be like to lay quiet and peaceful beneath the sweet green grass of the pastures.
She imagin
ed it would be cold and lonely—
as cold and lonely as her heart felt now. Only her heart couldn
’t ascend to the glories of h
eaven. Though her lips still burned with the fire of Reb
’
s kiss, her soul felt abandoned and cold.
Though her heart still ached with the pain of being in love with a man who was so far out of reach, her arms and legs were numb.

As Sage lay down in the grass next to Ruthie
’
s grave, tears spilled from her eyes at last.
As she cried out the aching of her wounded heart and soul
,
the clouds drifted silently overhead.
As she sobbed for want of being in Reb
’s arms—of
simply
being
in his company
—
meadowlarks nesting in the piñon trees nearby called out their happy summer songs.
And as
she drifted into a sad slumber—
exhauste
d from her tears and heartache—
the breeze played among the wildflowers
,
and cattle
grazed
nearby
—careless of the world
.

Chapter Twelve

“
Never thought I
’
d see the day that nephew of mine would spend a night in jail,
” Eugenia said.

Sage sighed.
She reached down and drew a wet petticoat out of the basket at her feet.
Shaking it out, she took two clothespins from the pocket of her apron and attached the garment to the clothesline.

“Did you…did
you get to talk to him then?
”
Sage asked.
Though she
’
d cried herself to sleep near Ruthie
’
s grave the day before, Sage had been unable to sleep soundly through the night.
She
could think of nothing but Reb—
his anger at the cowboy who betrayed him
,
the beating he
’
d given the man
,
and his ordering Ivy to leave.
Most of all, however, her thoughts lingered on the way he
’d looked at her—
accusing her of being just like Ivy.
The kiss he
’
d given her had been admi
nistered with a brutal passion—an infuriated
desire.
Yet his eyes held more hurt and anger than she could
ever imagine
.

All through the night
, Sage had tossed and turned—replayed every event—
every moment she
’
d ever spent in Reb Mitchell
’
s presence.
The angel on her right shoul
der whispered he cared for her—was hurt—
that she
’
d broken his heart by not going to him after the mountain lion attack.
The devil perched on her left shoulder, however, murmured he saw every woman as owning as black and as selfish a heart as Ivy
’s—
and that it wouldn
’
t have mattered if she
’
d gone to him.

“
Yep,
”
Eugenia said.
“
Went down to the jail yesterday right after it all happened thinkin
’
I could talk some sense into Sheriff Lambson and get R
eb out. But
after I saw the way that boy was still carryin
’
on…
”
Eugenia shook her head.
“
Well,
”
she continued,
“
I got to thinkin
’
a night in jail might be just what he needed.
”
Eugenia sighed.
“It seemed to do him some good ’
cause when I saw him just now, he was settled down and on his way home like a whipped dog with its tail between its legs.
”

“
He
’
s all right then?
”
Sage asked, pinning a white shirtwaist to the clothesline.

“
Well, he
’
s out of jail, at least,
”
Eugenia said.
“
As far as him bein
’ all right…well,
that remains to be seen.
”

Eugenia did not miss the moisture in Sage
’
s eyes.
The girl had b
een crying for more than a week.
Each time she
’
d come home from her walks or her rides out on
Drifter, her eyes would be red—
her cheeks swollen and puffy.
Eugenia knew Sage
’
s heart was breaking, knew Reb
’s was too.
Confound it!
She wanted to take them both, plop them over her knee
,
and paddle their behinds good and hard!
But a body couldn
’
t force people to let go of what frightened them.
A body could only love and encourage.

Rebel and Sage were both stricken with fear.
Reb was afraid Sage wouldn
’
t forgive him for the mountain lion
attack—
couldn
’
t love him forever.
He feared she was like Ivy, only loving him on the surface.
He feared he
’
d let himself love her only to find she
’
d toss him away one day
,
having lost interest in him somehow.

Sage
,
on the other hand, was afraid to take
a chance—
afraid to show any emotion.
Fea
r kept her from running to Reb—
kept her from confessing she loved him
—
from seeing he loved her.
It was as if Reb stood on one side of
a river and Sage on the other—
both afraid to cross for fear of drowning
.
Therefore, they both simply stood gazing at each other
—
dreaming of wh
at each wished would come true—
each one certain they
’
d drown if they attempted to swim out and capture the dream.

It was the most frustrating, infuriat
ing, and heartbreaking situation.
Eugenia wanted to scream with exasperation at Reb
’
s guilt and mistrust and Sage
’
s blindness and inability to express herself!
Still they were each wounde
d. She must keep that in mind—
use sympathy, patience
,
and compassion as her tools.
Yet her resolve to remain calm and patient was quickly thinning.

“
Do you love him, Sage?
”
Eugenia asked, suddenly.

Sage began to tremble
yet tried to appear unaffected.
Draping the waistband of another petticoat over the line, Sage secured it with several clothespins.
Eugenia knew the answer to her own question.
As sure as Sage stood there right next to her, Eugenia knew.
So why then did she ask it?
Yet Sage knew she would be a fool to deny it.

“
It doesn
’
t matter if I love him or not, Miss Eugenia,
”
Sage said.
“
He
’
s obviously lumped me in with Ivy.
”
Sage fought the tears begging for release.

“
He
’
s afraid, Sage.
Surely you see his fear.
Surely you know he doesn
’
t really think you
’
re the likes of her,
”
Eugenia scolded.
“
And you
’
re just afraid too!
It
’
s plain and simple.
” Eugenia rather huffed—
shook her head.
She reached out, taking Sage by the shoulders.
“
Now you look me in the eye and tell me you think Reb really still has any feelin
’
s for Ivy.
Look me in the eye and tell me you really think he doesn
’
t care for you.
I heard tell from not just a few folks in town that boy gave you quite the kiss there in front of God and the entire world a moment before Sheriff Lambson hauled him off to jail yesterday.
So you look me in the eye and tell me he doesn
’
t care for you.
”

Sage swallowed hard—
willed the tears not to leave her eyes for want of traveling down her cheeks.

“
Tell me, Sage.
Do you really think Reb feels the same way about you as he does Ivy?
I think you know he doesn
’
t.
I think you know he cares for you
,
and I think you
’
re just afraid to let him know you care for him,
”
Eugenia said.

Sage couldn
’
t confess to Eugenia, however. She couldn
’
t tell Eugenia she loved Reb more
than she did her own existence.
She couldn
’
t tell her she
’
d never know one happy moment for the rest of her life without him. She couldn
’
t tell her anything!
Not about the peach cobbler kisses in the kitchen, not about the kiss in the barn or in the pastures on the way to the ranch.
She couldn
’
t explain how t
he sun had warmed her that day—
how wearing
Rose’
s scand
alous dress had freed her mind—
allowed her to accept and indeed return the passion Reb had rained over her.
At that moment the enchanting memory still caused her flesh to prickle with goose
bumps.

Sage closed her eyes, clinging to the memory of being in Reb
’
s arms, remembering the feel of his lips to hers.
Her stomach sickened, nearly heaving at the thought of Reb ever holding Ivy
or any other woman in his arms—
ever taking any other woman
’
s mouth with his the way he had taken hers.

Sage opened her eyes as she felt Eugenia firmly take hold of her chin.
An unfamiliar frown puckered Eugenia
’s brow. H
er te
eth seemed tightly clenched. H
er eyes narrowed as she
studied
Sage.

“
Now you listen to me,
” Eugenia began.
“
I don
’
t know what went on between the two of you before that infernal cat started all this mess!
I don
’
t know what went on before that wicked Ivy Dalton stirred the soup pot further. But I do know…whatever Reb
’
s plans were for you the day he took you out to the ranch…whatever the two of you might have shared over these past couple of months…it
’
s worth fightin
’
for, Sage.
Every bit of it!
”

“How
can you be sure?
”
Sage whispered.
“
How can I be sure he wasn
’t j-
just havin
’
a bit of fun?
”

“
He wasn
’
t,
”
Eugenia stated. She sighed, releasing Sage
’
s chin
,
and lovingly caressed her cheek.
“
And you know him well enough to be certain of it in your heart.
That cat gettin
’
at you scared him, Sage.
Scared him nearly to death.
Then Ivy shows up and reminded him fresh what heartache can do to a man.
Reb knew Ivy wouldn
’t ever own his heart
…wouldn
’
t ever break his heart again.
But he knows
you
can.
”

“
Then he
’
s a coward,
”
Sage said, leaning down to retrieve another petticoat from the basket.
She shook her head, reminding her tears they could not come.
Reb Mitchell was anything but a coward.
Sage knew it.
Yet Eugenia
’
s words were harsh and accusing, hurtful.

“
You
’
re right,
”
Eugenia said.
“
You
’
re right. Forget the fact he fought a mountain lion to save your life.
Forget he tended to your wounds, sewed you up first before takin
’
care of himself.
Forget all of it.
And you
’
re still right.
He is a coward.
”

Sage shook her head again—
held her breath.
She could not cry.
Not until she was alone.
She thought of the wounds to Reb
’s body—
the deep, painful wounds inflicted by the cat.
She thought
of his attention to her wounds—
how careful he must
’
ve been.
She shivered at the knowledge he could
’
ve been killed for her sake.
The mountain lion could
’
ve killed him.
But it didn
’
t just as it hadn
’
t killed her because of him.