Authors: Camilla Läckberg
As if in slow motion she undid her seat belt and opened the car door, leaving it wide open after she climbed out. With a feeling of impending doom she walked very slowly toward the accident scene.
The first thing she saw was the blood. The red running from his head onto the asphalt and spreading out in a wide circle around his hair. The second thing she saw were his eyes. Wide open, dead.
A man was heading toward her, his arms ready to stop her. His mouth moved, said something. She ignored the man and continued straight ahead. She fell heavily to her knees next to Morgan. She placed his head on her lap and held it close, without caring about the blood that was still trickling out and now wetting her trousers. Then she heard the wail. She wondered who could sound so sad, so full of pain. Then she realized it was herself.
Charlotte and Niclas had driven faster than the speed limit all the way to Uddevalla. Lilian had assured them that Albin was safe with Veronika and Frida, so they could drive directly to the hospital from the police station. Charlotte hoped that they wouldn’t arrive too late. Her mother had sounded as if Stig’s life hung by a thread, and she caught herself clasping her hands as if in prayer, although she was not a religious person.
Stig was the friendliest person she had ever met. She realized only now how fond of him she’d grown during the time they had lived with him and Lilian. She’d met him before that, of course, but it was always during such brief visits. She hadn’t really gotten to know him until they moved in. Much of her affection for him was based on how close he had been to Sara. He’d been able to coax out the good from her daughter, favorable traits that Charlotte had always known existed but couldn’t reach. Sara was never insolent to Stig, she never burst out in a rage, she didn’t jump around like a crazy person, incapable of controlling her energy. With him she sat calmly on the edge of the bed and held his hand, telling him about her day at school. Charlotte had never ceased to be amazed at how Sara behaved when she was with Stig, and now she sincerely regretted not having told him that. She realized she had hardly even spoken to him since Sara died. She had been so immersed in her own grief that she hadn’t even thought of his. He must have been heartbroken as he lay upstairs in his room, sick and in pain and with only his own thoughts to keep him company. She should have at least gone up to see him and have a talk.
As soon as the car stopped in the car park, Charlotte jumped out. She ran toward the entrance and didn’t wait for Niclas. He knew his way around the hospital better than she did, so he would soon catch up.
‘Charlotte!’ Lilian came toward her with arms outstretched as she entered the waiting room. Her mother was sobbing, and everyone turned to look at her. People crying had the same effect on their fellow human beings as car crashes. Nobody could help looking.
Charlotte awkwardly patted her mother on the back. Lilian had never been particularly demonstrative, and physical contact with her felt unusual.
‘Oh, Charlotte, it was dreadful! I went up to bring him some tea and he was completely out of it! I called his name and tried to shake him, but I got no response at all. And nobody can tell me what was wrong with him. He’s in intensive care and they won’t let me see him. Shouldn’t I be allowed to be with him? And what if he dies?!’
Lilian shrieked so loudly it was heard all over the room, and for a moment Charlotte was embarrassed to have everyone looking at them. Her mother had always had a tendency toward the dramatic, but that didn’t make her worry any less genuine.
‘Sit down, and I’ll go see whether I can find us a cup of coffee. Niclas will be here soon, and he can probably find out something in no time. They’re his old colleagues, after all.’
‘Do you think so?’ said Lilian, clinging to her daughter’s arm.
‘Certainly,’ said Charlotte, carefully loosening Lilian’s grip. It actually surprised her how calm and secure she felt. The loss of Sara had dulled her emotions, which made her able to think practically despite her own concern about Stig.
Gratefully, she saw Niclas enter the waiting room, and she met him at the door.
‘Mamma is hysterical. I’ll go and fetch some coffee for all of us. I promised her that you would try to find out more about what’s happening with Stig.’
Niclas nodded. He raised his hand and caressed Charlotte’s cheek. The unaccustomed gesture made her flinch. She couldn’t really remember him ever touching her with such tenderness.
‘How are you holding up?’ he asked her with genuine concern, and despite the sadness of the situation she felt something like joy blossom in her heart.
‘I’m doing all right,’ she replied, smiling at him as a sign that she wasn’t going to break down.
‘Are you sure?’
‘I’m sure. Go talk to your colleagues now, so we can get some straight answers.’
He did as she said. A while later, as she and Lilian were sitting together sipping their coffee, he came back and sat down next to them.
‘Well? Did you find out anything?’ said Charlotte, trying by sheer force of will to make him say something positive. Unfortunately it didn’t work.
Niclas’s face was grim when he said, ‘I’m afraid we have to prepare for the worst. They’re doing what they can, but they’re not sure that Stig will live out the day. We just have to wait and see.’
Lilian gasped and threw her arms round Niclas’s neck. He awkwardly patted her back. Charlotte had a sense of déjà vu. Lilian had been in this same state when Charlotte’s father died, and the doctors ended up giving her a sedative so she wouldn’t totally fall apart. The whole thing was so unfair. Losing one husband was bad enough. Charlotte turned to Niclas.
‘Couldn’t they tell you anything about what’s wrong with him?’
‘They doing lots of tests and will probably work out eventually what it is. But right now the most important thing is to keep him alive long enough to be able to find the proper treatment. As things look now, it could be anything from cancer to some viral infection. All they said was that he should have come to the hospital long ago.’
Charlotte saw the guilt flicker like a shadow across his face. She leaned her head against his shoulder.
‘You’re only human, Niclas. Stig didn’t want to go to the hospital, and it didn’t seem dangerous when you examined him, did it? He was up now and then and seemed fairly spry, and he said himself that he didn’t have much pain.’
‘I shouldn’t have listened to him. Damn it, I’m a doctor, I should have known better.’
‘Don’t forget that we’ve had a few other things on our minds,’ Charlotte said in a low voice, but Lilian still heard her.
‘Why does all the misfortune in the world have to descend on us? First Sara, and now Stig,’ she wailed, blowing her nose in the paper napkin that Charlotte had given her. People in the waiting room who had gone back to reading their magazines now looked at them again. Charlotte felt irritation seize hold of her.
‘You have to pull yourself together. The doctors are doing all they can,’ she said, trying to make her voice as soothing as possible, without taking the force out of what she said. Lilian gave her an injured look, but obeyed and stopped sniffling.
Charlotte sighed and rolled her eyes at Niclas. She didn’t doubt that her mother’s distress about Stig was genuine, but her tendency to turn every situation into a drama starring herself was incredibly trying. Lilian had always thrived when she was the center of attention, and she used every means at her disposal to achieve that position, even now. That was just how she was, and Charlotte struggled to accept it and conceal her vexation. This time her mother’s suffering was real.
Six hours later they still hadn’t heard any news. Niclas had gone in to talk with the doctors repeatedly, but they didn’t have any more information. The prognosis for Stig was still uncertain.
‘Somebody has to drive home and see to Albin,’ said Charlotte, talking as much to Lilian as to Niclas. She saw that her mother opened her mouth to protest, unwilling to let either her daughter or son-in-law go, but Niclas anticipated what she was going to say.
‘Yes, you’re right. He’ll be terrified if Veronika tries to put him to bed at her house. I’ll go, so you can stay here.’
Lilian looked annoyed, but she knew that they were right and reluctantly gave in.
Niclas kissed Charlotte on the cheek and then patted Lilian on the shoulder. ‘Everything will work out, you’ll see. Call if you hear anything.’
Charlotte nodded. She watched him vanish down the corridor and then leaned back in the uncomfortable chair and closed her eyes. It was going to be a long wait.
31
Göteborg 1958
The disappointment ate at Mary from the inside. Nothing had turned out the way she’d thought. Nothing had changed. Except that she didn’t even receive the brief displays of kindness and tenderness from her mother now that Åke was no longer here. In fact, Mary hardly ever saw her. She was either on her way out to meet Per-Erik, or she had to go to a party somewhere. Her mother also seemed to have abandoned all attempts to control Mary’s weight, so she could eat anything in the house. By now she had far surpassed her former top weight. Sometimes when she looked at herself in the mirror she saw only the monster that had been growing inside her for so long. A voracious, fat, loathsome monster, constantly surrounded by a nauseating smell of sweat. Mother didn’t even bother to conceal the disgust she felt when she looked at her. Once she had even obviously held her nose when she passed by. The humiliation still stung.
This wasn’t the way that Mother had promised things would be. Per-Erik was supposed to be a much better father than Åke ever was, Mother would be happy, and they would finally live together like a real family. The monster would disappear, she would never again have to sit in the cellar, and that dry, sickening, dusty taste would never again fill her mouth.
Duped. That was how she felt. Duped. She’d tried to ask her mother when things were going to turn out as she’d promised, but got only brusque answers in return. When she insisted, she’d been locked in the cellar, after first being fed a little Humility. She had cried bitter tears that contained far more disappointment than she could handle.
Sitting in the dark, she felt the monster thriving. It liked the dryness in her mouth. It ate it and rejoiced.
The door closed heavily behind him. Moving slowly, Patrik went into the hall and wriggled out of his jacket. He left it lying on the floor, too exhausted to bother hanging it up.
‘What happened?’ said Erica in a worried voice from the living room. ‘Did you find out something new?’
When he saw her face, Patrik felt a pang of guilt that he hadn’t stayed at home with her and Maja. He must look like a wreck. He had phoned home from time to time, of course, but the chaos at the station after what happened had made the conversations extremely abrupt and stressful. As soon as he confirmed that everything was all right at home, he had more or less hung up on her.
He plodded into the living room. As usual, Erica was sitting in the dark and watching TV with Maja on her lap.
‘I’m sorry I was so curt on the phone,’ he said, rubbing his face wearily.
‘Did something happen?’
He collapsed onto the sofa and at first couldn’t reply.
‘Yeah,’ he said after a moment. ‘Ernst got the idea of bringing in Morgan Wiberg for questioning, completely on his own authority. He managed to stress the poor boy out so badly that he escaped out of a window, ran into the street, and was hit by a car.’
‘My God, that’s horrible!’ said Erica. ‘What happened to him?’
‘He died.’
Erica gasped. Maja, who was asleep, whimpered but then settled down again.
‘It was so horrendous, you can’t imagine,’ said Patrik, leaning his head back and staring up at the ceiling. ‘As he lay there in the street, his mother showed up. She rushed forward before we could stop her, took his head in her lap, and then sat rocking him and wailing in a way that hardly sounded human. We finally had to tear her away from him. Jesus Christ, it was ghastly.’
‘And Ernst?’ said Erica. ‘What happened to him?’
‘For the first time I actually think he’s going to be sacked. I’ve never seen Mellberg so mad. He sent him home on the spot, and after this I don’t think he’ll be coming back. Which would be a blessing.’
‘Does Kaj know?’
‘Yeah, and that’s a whole other story. Martin and I were questioning him when the accident happened, and we had to run outside. If it had happened a few minutes later, I think we could have got him to talk. Now he’s totally clammed up and refuses to say a word. He blames us for Morgan’s death, and to some degree he’s right. Some colleagues from Göteborg were supposed to arrive this morning to interrogate Kaj, but they had to postpone it indefinitely. Kaj’s lawyer put a stop to all questioning for the time being, considering the circumstances.’
‘So you still don’t know whether he was involved in Sara’s murder? And in … in what happened yesterday?’
‘No,’ said Patrik wearily. ‘The only thing that’s sure is that it couldn’t have been Kaj who took Maja out of the stroller. We had him in custody at the time. Has Dan been here, by the way?’ he said, caressing his daughter and lifting her over to his own lap.