The Secrets of Harry Bright (13 page)

"Make him a little more security conscious," said Sidney Blackpool, wondering if the well-stocked bar in the living room contained Johnnie Walker Black. Then he looked at his watch and saw that it wasn't 10:00 A
. M
., and thought that the Johnnie Walker impulse was very bad, vacation or not.

A few minutes later the houseboy came padding in barefoot. He wore a peppermint-green kimono with enormous sleeves and a silk-screen flying crane on the back. He was about sixty years old and now wore a strawberry-blond toupee slightly askew.

"Golly you scared me!" he said, extending a hand palm down to Sidney Blackpool.

After shaking hands with both detectives, he smiled and said, "My gosh! When that shower curtain came swishing back I expected to see Anthony Perkins standing there in drag! I was so disappointed! Would you like coffee or a drink or something?"

"No, thanks, Mister Penrod," Sidney Blackpool said. "Sorry to meet you this way."

It's okay," the little man said. "And please call me Harlan. Everyone does. I can see how you'd get suspicious, being cops and all. Pardon me, policemen, I mean."

"Cops is fine," Sidney Blackpool said.

"Really? On Dragnet Jack Webb always said you didn't like to be called cops."

"Jack Webb wasn't a cop," Sidney Blackpool said.

"Well, sit for goodness' sake," said Harlan Penrod. "I must look a fright." And after touching his toupee he realized he did. "Oh gosh," he said, trying to tug it into place subtly. "I was just clipping my nails when you pulled the curtain back. The blood? Well, I was reading the L
. A
. Times and cutting a peach and oh, I just get so mad reading about Rose Bird and her California Supreme Court. We keep voting for the death penalty and they keep fixing it so these killers stay alive. I was so mad at Rose Bird I sliced my finger instead of the peach!"

"We just stopped by to acquaint ourselves with the house and ask a few questions." Sidney Blackpool glanced at Otto who knew that he was thinking, If we can think of what question to ask in a seventeen-month-old homicide.

"We wouldn't have to put up with Rose Bird if that so-called governor Jerry Brown hadn't appointed her," Harlan Penrod said. "Did you see the portrait of him they hung in the state capitol? I mean, did the artist ever capture that repressed reclusive paranoid? In another life Jerry Brown was Emily Dickinson. I only wish we could get rid of Rose Bird and the rest of Jerry Brown's supreme court. I think just like a cop. I'm all for death!"

"We're awful sorry to disturb you like this, but . . ." "Oh, you're not disturbing me. Do you know ho
w l
onely it gets here? Mister and Mrs. Watson never come anymore since Jack died. Gosh, unless they let some friends use the place for a weekend I don't see anybody. Do you know how lonesome it gets in a house like this all by yourself?"

"Are you allowed to have friends come over?" Otto asked, his arms on the back of the sofa as he admired all the museum pieces that Sidney Blackpool hated.

"Golly yes. Mister and Mrs. Watson are very nice to work for. And of course the property keeps me busy enough. I'm not that young anymore." Harlan Penrod took a sneaky little tug on his toup when lie said that, but still wasn't satisfied that it was centered. "This is a good job, believe me. I'm not complaining. I just miss having people here to take care of and cook for. Hey! When Mister Watson called, he said that you two gentlemen might be here for a week. Would you like me to cook a dinner for you?"

"Well, I don't think so," Sidney Blackpool said. "We have our hotel and . . .

"Oh, it's no trouble! I'd just love to. My training was originally as a chef, you know. What do you like? I could fix you anything. I have carte blanche at Jurgensen's Market. You could invite your wives. Die, you bring them along?"

"We're riot married," Otto said. "Both divorced." "Really!" Harlan Penrod cried. "Oh, you must come to dinner!"

"Well, maybe later in the week," Sidney Blackpool said. "Now about the murder."

"Are you going to solve it? I mean, do you have some new clues?"

"Not really," Otto said. "We're just gonna go over the old clues. Except there ain't any."

"I know," Harlan Penrod nodded, wrapping his kimono modestly around his bony knees. "I was wondering why two detectives came clear from Hollywood. I know you got lots of cases to work on there."

"We got cases by the gross, by the pound, by th
e c
ase," Otto said. "We're sort a doing a favor for Mister Watson. Just taking another look."

"Jack was such a beautiful boy," Harlan Penrod said. "He was so sensitive, so intelligent, so . . . kind, you know? He was at the age where kids can be fresh and know-it-all, last year of college and all that. But not Jack. He was basically such a sweet person."

"To you?" Otto asked.

"Golly yes," Harlan Penrod said. "He was so . . . comfortable to be around. He liked people and was concerned about them. I think he cared about me, I really do. Like a family member, not just an employee."

"The police report says you were out of town the night he disappeared," Otto said, going through the motions of a homicide follow-up.

"Yes, to L
. A
. I've hated myself for not being here. You have no idea how many times I've thought of it." "Why'd you go to L
. A
. ?"

"Well, I never admitted it to the Palm Springs detectives, but after all this time I guess it doesn't make any difference. I had to testify in a criminal trial and I didn't want Mister Watson to know. It was s000000 lurid."

"A criminal trial?" Otto cocked an eyebrow at Sidney Blackpool. "Were you involved in a crime?"

"Gosh no! I was sort of a witness. Oh, it was awful!" Harlan Penrod jumped up and took several little steps over to the bar where he poured himself some orange juice from a pitcher. "Care for some juice? Fresh-squeezed."

"No, thanks," Otto said, while Sidney Blackpool shook his head and spied the bottle on the bar shelf--Johnnie Walker Black.

"Well," Harlan Penrod said, returning to the sofa and crossing his legs after making sure the kimono didn't flop open. "I actually left Hollywood and came to live in the desert because of that terrible business. You see, I used to work for one of the sound studios on Santa Monica where people with no talent whatsoever go to cut records. Oh, it was so sad. All these young boys and girls with hopes and dreams. Little rock bands with some awful song the
y w
rote. Hopes and dreams. I was so depressed all the time."

Sidney Blackpool looked at his watch and Otto said, "We, uh, have an appointment in a little while."

"Do you?" Harlan Penrod was crestfallen. "Anyway, one day in the studio when they were doing a sound mix, my boss who was oh so nelly got in a terrible row with his boyfriend, this person named Godfrey Parker, a bitch if there ever was one. They were almost slapping each other's face when I went home. And the next day they found my boss. Oh, it was unspeakable!"

"What happened?" Otto was getting caught up in Harlan Pen
od's narrative.

"It was a typical queen murder," Harlan said. "I remember one in my apartment building. A closet queen cut his lover to pieces. When the cops came they found all these trash bags in the apartment. 'He's in this one,' a cop would yell. 'He's in this one too,' another cop would holler. Oh, it was awful. The best part of him was found in an alligator bag!"

"But back to the sound studio," Otto said, pouring himself some orange juice after all.

"Yes, well, the police came the next morning after the janitor called and they found my boss lying dead right there in the studio. With a studio microphone . . . oh, this is awful . . . sticking two feet out of his rectum!"

"That's pretty gruesome, all right," Otto said.

"And Godfrey had turned up the volume full blast! He was a fiend! And those cops that came that morning, do you know what they said?"

"Can't imagine," said Sidney Blackpool.

"The first one said, 'Well, I know who the deceased must be.' And then he named that T
. V
. reporter on Channel Seven? You know, the one that's always doing exposes on the L. A. P. D. And the policeman said, 'The suspect's one of us. Some cop finally did what we've all been threatening to do.' Well, they had to cut the mike pole out of him with a bolt cutter!"

"That's what Reagan felt like doing when he made the joke about bombing the Russians," Sidney Blackpool said.

But getting back to Jack Watson. We have some new information that he may've driven to Hollywood the day he disappeared. He bought a tire at a Bolls-Royce dealership. Would you have any idea why he might've gone to Hollywood?"

"Hollywood? No! I'm shocked! He came to the desert that weekend because he was tired from final exams at college. His fiancee was coming. We have a Rolls dealer here in Palm Springs. Why would he go clear to Hollywood for a tire?"

"He wouldn't," Otto said. "lie must've had another reason for going."

"I have no idea why he'd drive two hours when he was here to rest. And I can't imagine why he'd take the Rolls."

"Why do you say that?" asked Sidney Blackpool.

"He hated the Rolls. So pretentious, he always said. Wouldn't even ride in it. He had his own car, a Porsche Nine-eleven his mom bought him. If he was going into town for something urgent he'd drive that Porsche."

"You sure about that?" Otto asked.

"Without a doubt. He never told his folks how he hated that Rolls but he told me lots of times. That's why he never flew here when he'd come on weekends. He didn't want to be stuck driving a Rolls-Royce. He always drove down to the desert so he'd have his own car to run around in."

"Did he come here often? To rest, I mean?" Sidney Blackpool asked.

"Oh, maybe twice a month during the school year. For two or three days at a time."

"In the police report his dad said that jack seldom came here alone."

"Actually, Jack came here more than they knew," Harlan Penrod said. "His morn and dad're very busy people and he usually told them he was staying at the fraternity house, but he'd come here. I never mentioned it because right after he died I didn't want to say anything more than I had to."

"Why's that?" Otto asked.

"I'd only been working for the Watsons about six months at that time, and I heard Mister Watson describe Jack to the police. Such a bright, decent, hardworking student, he said, and yes, Jack was all that, but . . ."

"What?"

"Jack frequently came to Palm Springs to spend weekends, but never when his folks were here, and he never wanted them to know. He told me not to let on."

"Did you ever ask him why?"

"He said his dad treated him like a kid and might snoop around."

"Snoop around?"

"Sergeant, he was a gorgeous kid twenty-two years old! When he went out at night I imagine he ended up at a disco. I mean, he had a fiancee, sure, but lots of pretty college girls come in from San Diego and L
. A
. You know how it is to be twenty-two."

Sidney Blackpool looked at Otto and said, "Anything else?"

"Did you ever think he was kidnapped from the house?" Otto asked.

"Really, no," Harlan said, and his eyes had started to fill from talking about Jack Watson. "I mean, I know how dark it is in this neighborhood at night and how close we are to a ghetto, but everyone has all sorts of burglar alarms. And people are so careful. The old rich people, they'd rather have too much darkness than streetlights that might disturb their sleep. They don't even want police helicopters. Everyone's in bed at nine o'clock."

"Rather curse the darkness, eh?" Sidney Blackpool said, standing up. "Do those infrareds still work, the ones on top of those walls?"

"I think so."

"Do you always turn them on?"

"Oh, yes. I arm the burglar alarms inside and out before I go to bed, and whenever I'm out. Sometimes, though, it gets so lonely I'd almost welcome a burglar. If he wasn't mean."

"Careful, Harlan," Otto said. "Sometimes strange bedfellows make strange bedfellows."

Chapter
7

OFFICER BARNEY WILSON WOULD'VE HAD AN UNEVENTFUL career in the Coachella Valley if he hadn't gotte
n c
aught up in the labor movement. His career somewha
t p
aralleled Ronald Reagan's. That is, he was just a spea
r c
arrier until he made a speech on behalf of a colleagu
e w
ho was running for president of the police union. But
Barney Wilson never would've made that speech nor an
y s
peech were it not for a desert physician who, during
a r
outine annual physical, called the twenty-nine-year-ol
d c
op into his office and gave him the good news first. No
,
he didn't have the clap as he'd feared. He could keep th
e s
ame girlfriend and he wouldn't have to make any confessions to his wife. The bad news was that he'd only hav
e t
he girlfriend for two years. Ditto for the wife.