The Scars of Us (8 page)

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Which way do you want to practice first?”

“Um, the right.”

“Okay, keeping your right foot on the ground, I want you to push your body back with it, twisting while picking your left foot off the ground. As you slide backwards, keep your left shoulder pressed to the ground while lifting your right shoulder up until it is directly above the left. Your body should form the shape of an L. We refer to this as shrimping out. I’ll demonstrate first, then you’re going to try.”

I modeled the technique slowly several times, showing both directions before directing Kaiya to try. She executed the move very sluggishly at first, but after multiple attempts on each side, she finally was able to fluidly carry out the maneuver.

“Congratulations, you’ve mastered the Shrimp.” I smiled, slightly teasing her.

Returning my smile, she asked, “What’s next?”

“Now, I’m going to walk you through the steps to get away when an attacker traps you on the ground.”

Lying down on the floor, I continued, “Get between my legs and press against me as close as you can.”

“Wha… what?” she stammered, her cheeks flushing pink.

She’s so sexy when she blushes.

“Kneel in between my legs.” I paused, waiting for her to do as I said. “Now, scoot up and press your pelvis against me.”
Fuck, it’s so hard to be professional with her this close to me. All I want to do is rip her clothes off and fuck her.

Giving me a skeptical look, she slowly inched her way towards me until we were barely touching. I sat up and gently grabbed her by the hips, pulling her flush against me. Her lower body was cradled by the inside of my thighs, and her knees were framing the outside of my hips. “Like this,” I stated.

Her blush deepened as our eyes locked. Having her pressed against my dick caused it to start to harden.

“What now?” she asked, her voice cracking slightly. I didn’t know if she was turned on or just responding to the sudden feel of me.

“Now, place your hands outside my shoulders. This is the most common form of attack against women, and it usually escalates from this position, so it’s best to stop it as soon as possible. The first thing you want to do is brace your hands against your attacker’s shoulders, keeping your arms straight, like this.” I demonstrated. “This hinders their movement, and prevents them from coming down on your body. Notice how off balance you are?”

“Yeah, but you’re like ten times stronger than me. How am I supposed to keep a man off me that’s stronger and heavier than me?”

“You only need to keep them off you for a brief time. Once you have them in this position, use the Shrimp technique.” I modeled, pushing into the formation and propping my elevated foot against her hip. “Let me show you again.”

I demonstrated the move again before moving on to the next step. “Now, keep your foot on their hip as you slide your hands down to your attacker’s elbows, like this,” I said as I grabbed her elbows. “Next, twist back to the center, bringing both knees up and pressing both feet against their hips. The typical reaction for an attacker is to pull away, so when they do, slide your hands down to their wrists, bring your feet up, and kick the shit out of them. Then, run away and find help.”

I sat up, and we both pulled apart. “Any questions?”

“Where should I kick?”

“Anywhere— the groin, stomach, and face are the most vulnerable and effective targets to kick. Are you ready to try?”

Exhaling, she gave me a quick nod, “Yeah, I’m ready.”

“I’m going to walk you through everything, so don’t worry. Lie down and open your legs,” I instructed.

Briefly hesitating, she did as I requested.

“I’m going to get between your legs now, okay?”

When she nodded, I scooted up, placing my knees on the outside of her hips as I draped her legs on my thighs and pressed up against her. My mind briefly transported us to my bed, where she would be naked, open and ready for me, waiting for my dick to slide inside her.

Concentrate on the technique. You’ll have her soon.

“Now, I’m going to try to come down on you. Stop me by bracing your hands against my shoulders.” I started to move my upper body down toward hers, and she threw her hands up, stopping me by grabbing my shoulders. “Good, now shrimp out and place your foot on my hip.”

That move was more difficult for her to execute, so we practiced it several times until she felt like she got the hang of it before moving on to the next step. The constant contact and rubbing had hardened my cock more, but Kaiya didn’t say anything. I knew she felt it by the way she tried to adjust when it pressed against her, causing her face to redden.

“From here, slide your hands down to my elbows and move back to the center while bringing both knees up and putting your feet on my hips.”

“Like this?” she asked as she trailed her hands down to my elbows and propped her feet on me. Her touch was light as her skin grazed mine.

“Yes, now slip your hands down and grip my wrists as I pull away. I’m going to move my head to the side so you can practice kicking upwards. Go ahead and kick.”

We practiced the routine a few more times, and Kaiya moved more fluidly each time. I could tell she was becoming more comfortable with me as her body relaxed throughout the exercise. As class ended, I gathered everyone on the mat again before I closed. “Great class today, everyone. I love the enthusiasm, and I want to thank you for your active participation. Remember, we can’t predict exactly how an attack will happen, but practicing these techniques will definitely help in any situation. Always fight back—punch, kick, scream, scratch, anything to protect yourself. See you Tuesday.”

Everyone filed out of the room, except Kaiya.

Glancing shyly as she approached me, she said, “I just want to thank you for working with me. Like I said, I don’t do well with strangers touching me.”

“No problem. See you Tuesday? For the next class?”

Biting her lower lip in contemplation, she didn’t say anything for several seconds before she replied, “Yes. I’ll be here Tuesday.”

“Great, I’ll see you then.”

She turned to walk away, but I stopped her. “Wait.” I wanted to keep talking to her. Something about her intrigued me, maybe the fact that she didn’t just give into me like other girls.

“Before you go, let me give you my number, in case you need to get a hold of me for class or something.” Reaching my hand out, I gestured for her to give me her phone.

Rolling her eyes, she questioned, “Do you give your number to all your students?”

“Only VIP ones,” I joked. I didn’t normally give out my personal number to students, but I wanted an excuse to get Kaiya’s. I kept my hand out, and she finally placed her phone in my palm. Keying my number in, I called my phone so that I’d have her number, too.

As I gave her phone back, I said, “Let me walk you to your car.”

“You don’t have to do that—I’ll be fine.”

“Just let me walk you to your car,” I insisted.

“Fine,” she huffed before smiling.

So stubborn.

As we walked, I took the opportunity to try to get to know her better, hoping that would help in my quest to get her in my bed. I ignored the fact that I was interested in her, that I actually wanted to know more about her.

“So, do you and Kamden live together?”

“Yeah, just me and him. We’ve lived in our apartment together since college.”

“Any other family?”

Her skin paled as her eyes widened. “No.”

Okay, not a good topic. Maybe we have more in common than I thought.
“What do you do for work?”

Her face relaxed, and color began to return to her cheeks. “I’m a Project Coordinator for a marketing and public relations firm in Boston.”

“Sounds boring.”

She looked offended, but laughed. “Thanks. Not everyone gets to work out for a living.”

“It’s pretty awesome,” I admitted. We were nearing the exit doors, so my time with her was running out. “What do you like to do for fun?”

I opened the door for her as she answered, “I love to go dancing.”

“I’ll keep that in mind when I ask you out.”

She laughed again; this had to be the most I’d ever seen her do so. I was getting somewhere, finally.

“Anything else that might help my chances?”

She stopped by a black, Acura TL before leaning against it, facing me.

“You don’t want to get involved with me,” she said with a half-hearted smile.

“Oh, yeah? Why not?” I replied as I stepped closer to her.
Always fighting me.

Her eyes watched me warily. This close to her, I could see so many different hues of blue and green that made up the unique shade of her eyes. They really were beautiful. “I just… I have a lot of issues.”

“Don’t we all?” I asked in a rhetorical tone.
I know I do.

She chuckled softly, “Not like mine.”

“You tell me yours, I’ll tell you mine.”
What am I saying? I don’t want to her to know about my past—do I?

“That’s never going to happen,” she replied matter-of-factly, an unspoken challenge present in her eyes.

“Never say never.” I smirked while backing away. “Goodnight, Kaiya.”

I didn’t need to say anything else that I might regret, like telling her my whole life story.
Why does she make me feel so different? Why do I want to open up to her?

Shaking her head, she smiled as she got into her car. As I turned around, I couldn’t help but think,
Tuesday can’t come fast enough.

My body still thrummed with adrenaline from a combination of class and touching Ryker. It amazed me how just being close to him made me feel so alive, like I hadn’t really been living until I met him. Honestly, I really hadn’t.

Kaleb had made me afraid to live, afraid to trust anyone. But with Ryker, I felt there was a chance that I could open up to him, and that scared the living shit out of me.
If I couldn’t even trust Kaleb, how could I trust Ryker?

Shaking the thoughts from my head, I started my car to drive home. I didn’t want to think about anything negative when I was feeling so good, when I actually felt… happy. I knew completing one self-defense class wasn’t very significant for most people, but it was huge—absolutely huge—for me. One of the many steps I needed to take to reclaim my life and eliminate the power Kaleb had over me.

My stomach growled as I walked into my apartment, so I headed straight for the kitchen to look for something quick to throw together for dinner.

As I rifled through the refrigerator, I heard Kamden call out, “I ordered a pizza—figured you wouldn’t want to cook.”

His voice had increased in volume as he walked from wherever he was in the apartment into the kitchen. When I closed the refrigerator door, I turned to see him standing in the doorway. “How was class? Everything go okay?” he asked with concern.

“Yeah, everything went fine,” I shrugged. “I was a little nervous at first, but Ryker worked with me one-on-one to make sure I was comfortable,” I continued as I searched for the pizza, which I found right on the counter next to the refrigerator.
So observant.

“Ryker’s the instructor?” Kamden questioned. He sounded a bit bothered by the idea.

“Yeah,” I said, my focus mainly on the pizza box as I stalked towards it. Opening the cabinet above it, I grabbed a plate and put two slices on it before putting it in the microwave. When I turned back around to look at Kam, I noticed his furrowed brows and tense jaw. “What?”

“Nothing, just be careful with him,” he warned with a cautionary look in his eyes.

I voiced my thoughts aloud, perplexed by his warning, “Why?”

“I notice how he looks at you, Ky. He’s a total womanizer, and I don’t want you to be another notch on his bedpost.” He crossed his arms as his voice took on that over-protective, brotherly tone I knew so well.

Wow, I so don’t want to have this conversation.
Thankfully, the microwave beeped, giving me the perfect opportunity to escape. As I removed the plate, I said, “Don’t worry, Kam. I’ll be fine—I’m not interested in Ryker.”
Keep racking up those lies.

“I’m serious, Kaiya,” he sternly remarked, authority obvious in his words.

Placing the plate on the counter, I turned around to look at him—arms still folded tensely over his chest, eyes narrowed, mouth set in a tight, thin line.
He’s really upset over this.

“Kam, do you really think I’d be getting myself involved with someone, especially now? I’m barely holding myself together.”

The angry expression on his face eased, his features softening as he walked toward me. “You’re doing great,
sorella.
I didn’t mean to get upset at you. I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

“I know, but you have nothing to worry about. I’m not planning to get involved with Ryker, okay?” For some reason, those words caused my chest to tighten uncomfortably.
Do I want to be with Ryker?
I couldn’t deny the attraction to him, or the fact that I wanted to jump him every time I saw him, but did I want to be with him?

My stomach grumbled, interrupting my thoughts.

Kamden laughed. “You better eat—that thing sounds hungry.”